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ChainedExistence -> Claustrophobia and Bondage? (3/12/2007 4:16:21 PM)
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I am claustrophobic...I don't like elevators that aren't made of glass, I don't like sitting in a seatbelt when the car is not moving, I cannot handle turnstiles, and having the sheets cover my head. I can't IMAGINE how anyone could go into caves, or go deep sea diving underneath all that water. The mask alone would give me a heart attack. I would risk my own safety to get away from the illusionary threat that confined spaces make me feel, yet I find the grandest comfort in being bound. Even as a little girl, I would twist my sheets into wrist restraints to settle myself into sleep, and as an adult, I love blindfolds, and gags and feeling myself pinned underneath Master. I love his hands around my throat, I like feeling totally and completely overtaken and overwhelmed by the very things that would make me feel like screaming in terror any other time. I am not sure how this happens or why. It seems that the claustrophobia would make me unable to enjoy those things, or the bondage would undo the feeling of claustrophobia. Yet, they both exist in me simulateneously and all I can do is wonder how.
Does anyone else feel the same? ( probably so, but maybe you can explain it better)
Can anyone offer any other contradictory elements about themselves?
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