Not feeling right

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seekshertrue1 -> Not feeling right (3/13/2007 2:40:00 PM)
I was supposed to meet a potential slave today for lunch. I called to let him know I was running late but I was on my way. He told me that he didn't feel good about today. I asked why and he couldn't/wouldn't tell me. The phone went static and he was gone. I tried calling him numerous times and even went to where we were supposed to meet. I didn't find him there. Did I not do the right thing?

mixielicous -> RE: Not feeling right (3/13/2007 2:41:53 PM)
last minute anxiety. welcome to my life. try calling in a few days when he's had time to mull the situation.

goodpet -> RE: Not feeling right (3/13/2007 2:44:24 PM)
yes, cold feet, got scared.. might just be a passing anxiety. If he seems like he was worth the meeting, then give him a day or two and talk to him.. maybe let him know you understand but do not expect it to happen again.. then give it more time to talk, e-mails, and phone conversations before arranging a meeting right away. You'll know how soon to try again.

chastiseme -> RE: Not feeling right (3/13/2007 2:54:33 PM)
i agree with the above responses ... this might have been his first time meeting anyone he has met and spoken to online and probably got cold feet and just couldn't handle the situation. i remember my first time. i couldn't eat anything that day i was so nervous but i still managed to go out and meet that person.

littleone35 -> RE: Not feeling right (3/13/2007 2:56:27 PM)
You got good advice and did the right thing by telling him you were running late. Seems like he got cold feet. Matt's littleone

proudsub -> RE: Not feeling right (3/13/2007 3:37:27 PM)
quote: He told me that he didn't feel good about today. I asked why and he couldn't/wouldn't tell me. The phone went static and he was gone. Maybe he is married and the guilt got to him.[:o]

lateralist1 -> RE: Not feeling right (3/13/2007 4:16:08 PM)
Just leave the door open but don't chase him. If he has changed his mind once he can do it again.

windchymes -> RE: Not feeling right (3/13/2007 4:18:56 PM)
If you hadn't called, he would have probably been a no-show anyway. Nothing new.

Llyren -> RE: Not feeling right (3/13/2007 4:43:19 PM)
At the risk of a small segue, it does go both ways. I was asked to lunch on Sunday by someone I met here. Not only was he a no-show, he has taken down his profile and hasn't emailed or called me. Cold feet seem to be universal. Or else he actually was married and his wife found out. [sm=preen.gif]

windchymes -> RE: Not feeling right (3/13/2007 5:22:22 PM)
Unfortunately, it's part of the whole deal here. It's happened to me, too. It's fun for many to play online, but reality, ooooh, that's different! lol At least we walk away wiser.

KatyLied -> RE: Not feeling right (3/13/2007 5:27:43 PM)
I feel like a new song...Poof, the Magic Subbie

Llyren -> RE: Not feeling right (3/13/2007 5:52:40 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: KatyLied I feel like a new song...Poof, the Magic Subbie Poof, the Magic Subbie, lived off somewhere. Where that was I'll never know, and I do not care! Poof, the Maggic Subbie, said that he'd arrive So off to meet him, I did take a drive! He said he would travel, just to meet this dame. So although I waited, he simply never came! Even though he seemed to be really great online, Since he blew me off that day, he isn't worth my time! Poof, the Magic Subbie, never did appear Yet at my profile, he always seems to leer! Poof the Magic Subbie, simply go away. Not now or any other day will we ever play!

KatyLied -> RE: Not feeling right (3/13/2007 6:00:44 PM)
Oh my, well done. Seriously, I'm sorry the guy poofed, but there are many, I hate to use the word "fakes" here. Some people are just playing in their parent's (or wife's) basement and have no intention of ever taking it to the next (real) level.

Llyren -> RE: Not feeling right (3/13/2007 6:23:11 PM)
Thanks, Katy. I might polish it up a bit later, but the songbunny pounced, so I had to scribble it. As far as the guy, honestly, I'm a bit relieved, since I'd been having doubts about whether it was a good idea. It would have been nice had he at least told me he wasn't coming, but better to find out he's a squirrel now than later. One thing puzzles me. Why do so many people immediately demand rl contact when they have no intention of actually following through with it? [sm=preen.gif]

seekshertrue1 -> RE: Not feeling right (3/13/2007 8:00:17 PM)
When you get an answer to that question let me know. After a previous experience, I had decided I would go slower with the next one. This meeting was upon his insistence not mine. We had tried to meet once before but he wasn't able to meet. Guess I should have seen this second time coming too. I'll live and learn yet again.

chastiseme -> RE: Not feeling right (3/13/2007 8:31:21 PM)
ohh ... that was the second time ... scratch my comment about cold feet ... he was definitely playing around and wasn't sincere about meeting with you ... i wish you more luck with the next one [;)]

sublizzie -> RE: Not feeling right (3/13/2007 8:46:22 PM)
I can understand not meeting the first time and rescheduling it, but when you don't show for the 2nd time? You snooze, you lose.

MsSonnetMarwood -> RE: Not feeling right (3/13/2007 9:11:45 PM)
Unfortunately, it's not unusual for one person to poof when trying to move from typing online to meeting face to face. I would say it's probably more uncommon for both people to actually follow through. If I'm meeting someone from online, I generally have a couple criteria to cut down on poofing. One is only agreeing to meet those who have had some real time experience, particularly if they'd gone to something - a munch, whatever - in the local scene. The other is to meet them within a month of first contact, no excuses. I also only meet them somewhere that I want to be anyway - a munch, a bookstore. That way, if they're a no show, then I'm enjoying myself anyway. The other thing is that if they've stood me up - no second chances, period.

lighthearted -> RE: Not feeling right (3/14/2007 5:47:32 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Llyren quote: ORIGINAL: KatyLied I feel like a new song...Poof, the Magic Subbie Poof, the Magic Subbie, lived off somewhere. Where that was I'll never know, and I do not care! Poof, the Maggic Subbie, said that he'd arrive So off to meet him, I did take a drive! He said he would travel, just to meet this dame. So although I waited, he simply never came! Even though he seemed to be really great online, Since he blew me off that day, he isn't worth my time! Poof, the Magic Subbie, never did appear Yet at my profile, he always seems to leer! Poof the Magic Subbie, simply go away. Not now or any other day will we ever play! where's Troll when you need him?

happypervert -> RE: Not feeling right (3/14/2007 7:05:36 AM)
quote: Guess I should have seen this second time coming too. Not really -- someone can have legitimate reasons for missing a meeting, so I think that it is worth giving him a second chance if he was worth meeting in the first place. However, not explaining his discomfort or answering your calls gets him tossed right in the shit can.

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