Dom to-do-list

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WiseCracknSadist -> Dom to-do-list (3/13/2007 4:42:28 PM)
Hey everyone I'm a new Dom and I was just wondering what wonderful things that you might have to suggest that I do with my girl. I'm just curious what others like to do and then from there I can build my own bag of tricks. Also links to sites or posts that describe or explain different things to do would be appreciated. I completely expect there to be a bunch of smartass remarks before anyone gets serious (oops did I steal your thunder?). But for all who give me serious examples and help me out you have my thanks. P.S. The kinkier and more creative the better.

kyraofMists -> RE: Dom to-do-list (3/13/2007 4:52:16 PM)
Considering the thread that you started on poly that she is afraid she is going to be replaced, I would suggest building certainty in the relationship as something that should be at the top of your list. Knight's kyra

Quivver -> RE: Dom to-do-list (3/13/2007 4:52:23 PM)
ooooooh oooooooooh me first!! Dom for Dummies coming to your local book store soon! Groan.............

WiseCracknSadist -> RE: Dom to-do-list (3/13/2007 5:03:12 PM)
She likes to be Domianted and loves the bedroom fun. So I figured if I could come up with some fun stuff for her to do or us to do together I could build her esteem a little. If I'm investing in us maybe I can keep her from thinking I want to replace her. In either case I don't appreciate you mixing my business from thread to thread. Even though I posted it on a forum doesn't mean I need you airing it out from thread to thread. It's my business.

velvetears -> RE: Dom to-do-list (3/13/2007 5:04:43 PM)
http://www.dungeonnet.com/weblinks/Masters/ http://dungeonnet.com/weblinks/Rentals/more2.html http://gloria-brame.com/ http://www.xs4all.nl/~wijnands/rosie/rosie.htm http://www.fetishalliance.net/Stories/stories.htm http://www.leathernroses.com/generalbdsm/generalbdsm.htm#terms http://www.informedconsent.co.uk/encyclopervia/BDSM http://p081.ezboard.com/fthejourneyofthewaysfrm17.showMessage?topicID=283.topic http://www.albanypowerexchange.com/BDSMinfo/rack_vs_ssc.htm http://www.bdsm-education.com/rights.html http://www.enslavement.org.uk/essays http://www.sub-dom.com/d-s-article.htm http://www.domsub.info/ http://www.domsubfriends.com/1home.shtml http://rogerothornhill.typepad.com/confessions_of_an_english/2006/06/index.html http://www.bdsmlibrary.com/ http://www.domsubfriends.com/voye/index.shtml http://www.restraining-order.com/home.htm http://section12.com/ http://www.dshaven.com/index1.html http://www.steel-door.com/ http://www.americanfetish.net/ http://duskpeterson.com/leatherculture/bibliography/index.htm http://www.tdl.com/~thawley/oldgd.html http://www.frugaldomme.com/ Tried to give you a variety - hope this was helpful :-)

FukinTroll -> RE: Dom to-do-list (3/13/2007 5:05:10 PM)
Look here.

hisannabelle -> RE: Dom to-do-list (3/13/2007 5:05:45 PM)
it's readable for anyone who reads this thread, too, so she's not exactly airing your business. you've already aired it. if you didn't want people to see it, you shouldn't have posted it in the first place. :) that said, your original question is pretty damn vague. give us something to go on - a direction, something the two of you are interested in but don't know anything about, -something- to work with...maybe you will garner more suggestions that way.

RWAble -> RE: Dom to-do-list (3/13/2007 5:11:35 PM)
Take time to understand what drives her submissive soul and learn together as you both go. The brain is a wonderful tool.

WiseCracknSadist -> RE: Dom to-do-list (3/13/2007 5:18:48 PM)
It's damn vague so that I can get a more varied response. If I was specific I might not get something interesting because someone would not believe it to be on topic. And I don't need to be scolded publicly by someone who does not have full knowledge of what she's talking about. This is a seperate thread. If you have something to say about that topic look it up and post it there.

KnightofMists -> RE: Dom to-do-list (3/13/2007 5:20:48 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WiseCracknSadist In either case I don't appreciate you mixing my business from thread to thread. Even though I posted it on a forum doesn't mean I need you airing it out from thread to thread. It's my business. It's your business.. then keep it your business... instead of bringing it to the boards! The moment you put anything onto boards..all of it becomes subjected to the scrutiny of others to at their preference... regardless of where and when you have posted it. Secondly, this type of defensive response is not likely going to get you much of a warm acceptance from those you seek advice from. thirdly... as far as advice of my own to you.... "Stupid is as Stupid does!"

KnightofMists -> RE: Dom to-do-list (3/13/2007 5:23:02 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WiseCracknSadist And I don't need to be scolded publicly by someone who does not have full knowledge of what she's talking about. This is a seperate thread. If you have something to say about that topic look it up and post it there. How interesting that you considered yourself scolded.. maybe your girl is not the only one with a confidence issue.

hisannabelle -> RE: Dom to-do-list (3/13/2007 5:23:35 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WiseCracknSadist It's damn vague so that I can get a more varied response. If I was specific I might not get something interesting because someone would not believe it to be on topic. And I don't need to be scolded publicly by someone who does not have full knowledge of what she's talking about. This is a seperate thread. If you have something to say about that topic look it up and post it there. i have posted there. i'm fairly certain that since she posted about it, she probably read the thread, too. kyra's a pretty intelligent and respected poster, not the type to go spouting off at the mouth. still, as you've seen from the range of responses, such an open-ended question is more likely to get a "look up any bdsm site on the net" or "search the boards" rather than in-depth replies. all i'm proposing is that if you want in-depth replies, you might want to try narrowing it down a bit. if you don't, by all means, continue to expect people to give you the answers based on absolutely no information whatsoever. :)

PlayfulOne -> RE: Dom to-do-list (3/13/2007 5:25:06 PM)
If you don't have any ideas of your own, and you apparently do not seem interested in or know what she is interested in, then we can't do anything to help ya K

KnightofMists -> RE: Dom to-do-list (3/13/2007 5:25:43 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: hisannabelle if you don't, by all means, continue to expect people to give you the answers based on absolutely no information whatsoever. :) yup.. stupid is as stupid does

WiseCracknSadist -> RE: Dom to-do-list (3/13/2007 5:31:34 PM)
It's funny how people react. It's even funnier you think I care. My confidence in myself is fine. My mistake was including other people. You're friend is wrong and y'all are useless for coming to her aid. I'm not looking for warm welcomes. I'm just using y'all for my own ends. Hate me if you must. I won't be losing any sleep over it.

hisannabelle -> RE: Dom to-do-list (3/13/2007 5:36:12 PM)
i don't think you care, and i don't particularly care all that much. it's just that you persist like it's actually -working- for you when in reality you're -not- going to get the answers you want. which most likely means one of two things: either you posted the thread just to see if you could stir up shit, or you posted the thread in genuine curiosity, didn't get the reaction you wanted, acted like an asshole in response, and are continuing to act like an asshole out of stubbornness or stupidity or what-have-you. my "defense" of kyra was based more on the fact that she, alandra, and Knight are all people whose posts i find regularly insightful. i wasn't trying to be useful, i was just trying to point out the fact that she, in fact, DID know what she was talking about (as she has posted on the other thread) and it might behoove you to listen to her. she certainly doesn't need anyone to defend her posts; they defend themselves.

KnightofMists -> RE: Dom to-do-list (3/13/2007 5:38:42 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WiseCracknSadist It's funny how people react. It's even funnier you think I care. My confidence in myself is fine. My mistake was including other people. You're friend is wrong and y'all are useless for coming to her aid. I'm not looking for warm welcomes. I'm just using y'all for my own ends. Hate me if you must. I won't be losing any sleep over it. LMAO

kyraofMists -> RE: Dom to-do-list (3/13/2007 5:40:03 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: WiseCracknSadist She likes to be Domianted and loves the bedroom fun. So I figured if I could come up with some fun stuff for her to do or us to do together I could build her esteem a little. If I'm investing in us maybe I can keep her from thinking I want to replace her. Considering the issues that she is having, I think that is a recipe for disaster. Building her self worth/esteem based on things that you do together is going to send the message that she is valuable because of these things that she does or you do together. What happens then if you bring another girl in and start doing these same things with the other girl? No longer will your girl be valuable for the things that you do, since you have another to do them too. She will be right back into thinking she can be replaced. If you want to strengthen the relationship then show her that you value her for who she is and not what things she can do or you can do together. Knight's kyra

kyraofMists -> RE: Dom to-do-list (3/13/2007 5:44:00 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: hisannabelle kyra's a pretty intelligent and respected poster, not the type to go spouting off at the mouth. Thank you, annabelle. It is nice to know that other's appreciate my posts. I have grown a lot throughout the time I have posted on these boards and it feels good to share that with others. Knight's kyra

sambamanslilgirl -> RE: Dom to-do-list (3/13/2007 5:49:54 PM)
my two cents - start building a relationship first before asking about what we like to do. my pov from what others have surmised, your relationship is unstable.

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