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RE: It's really a MAN - 3/16/2007 3:06:47 PM

MIstrezzTanya

Posts: 26
Joined: 7/11/2005
Status: offline

I really agree with hereyesuponyou.... most wankers are empty after a couple of days... and I'm evaluating the potential of a submissive from the very first second we're chatting.

I used to call initially just to assure Myself that the person that I was talking to on the other end was of the sex they said they were..

then there was a stalker.......

NOW.. I always want to see your cam. I'll evaluate before I ask for it.. and I will even call once I've verified the identity

Then again.. I have been known to ask for driver's license's too..lol

I'll be honest. My total preference is to create a submissive in my reality, I've been fortunate online, but I prefer the physcial prescence.... I'm MUCH more diabolical live!

Miss Tanya

_____________________________

Build a man a fire and you keep him warm for a day. Set a man on fire and he will be warm for the rest of his life... lol

http://360.yahoo.com/mistrezztanya

(in reply to hereyesruponyou)

Post #: 21

RE: It's really a MAN - 3/16/2007 7:19:09 PM

GoddessDustyGold

Posts: 2822
Joined: 4/11/2004
From: Arizona
Status: offline

I have no problem with getting on the telephone in short order. Of course, I do not chat on IM, and I will exchange some email first. If someone is local and we have talked on the phone a few times, then I will arrange a meeting in a public place, like a Starbucks. I am not one to waste time, and I do state that in My profile. In fact, having the courage to talk on thephone and/or come out from behind that keyboard and meet for coffee or at a munch wins big points with Me. I seemtohjavethe opposite ptoblem. Either Iamgetting a onelienr wityh a phone number,orI amgetting every excuse in the book as to why it isnot possible tomeet Me f2f.
No, there is nothing wrong with asking for a phone call after a little bit of reasonable correspondence and/or IM chat. Chances are, I would be making those arrangements faster than you! *Smile*

_____________________________

Dusty
They that give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety
B Franklin
Don't blame Me ~ I didn't vote for either of them
The Hidden Kingdom

(in reply to SmackNMe)

Post #: 22

RE: It's really a MAN - 3/16/2007 7:45:43 PM

DianeB269

Posts: 1596
Joined: 10/30/2006
Status: offline

I gave my phone number to a sub once and I'll never do it again. Phone calls at 1,2,and 3am.
No thanks!!!

< Message edited by DianeB269 -- 3/16/2007 7:46:32 PM >

(in reply to SmackNMe)

Post #: 23

RE: It's really a MAN - 3/16/2007 8:09:38 PM

ExtremeMP

Posts: 44
Joined: 8/16/2004
From: New Orleans area
Status: offline

Have had several who were men posin as women in the past. Also had one who was very good at coming up with reasons for no phone or meet. Turned out she was married and using her MARRIED daughters pics as her own! Eventually caught up with her though in the long run.

Point is not all are men some are married and getting their kicks...

(in reply to SmackNMe)

Post #: 24

RE: It's really a MAN - 3/16/2007 8:36:34 PM

LadyIce

Posts: 406
Joined: 7/4/2006
Status: offline

"Meeting" on cam is a great first date.
Neither person has to go out of their way, and it can save a lot of time, prior
to meeting realtime.

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 25

RE: It's really a MAN - 3/16/2007 9:06:44 PM

Misstoyou

Posts: 1149
Joined: 9/4/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: GoddessDustyGold

... I will arrange a meeting in a public place, like a Starbucks. I am not one to waste time ...

Me, as well. Especially Starbucks. They're readily identifiable, and just everywhere! lol

It really shouldn't be a surprise that sub or Dom/Domme, people online aren't necessarily who they say they are. That's why no one is real to me until I meet them real-time, though I know that's easier for a Domme to arrange than a submissive.

_____________________________

~ Miss Marie

a.k.a. "mean Lady"

(in reply to GoddessDustyGold)

Post #: 26

RE: It's really a MAN - 3/16/2007 9:43:21 PM

BlkTallFullfig

Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
Status: offline

I personally don't like people putting hoops for me to jump through in order to believe me... I expect to be trusted on a basic level, and on a coninuum during our contact.
That being said, I'm very open/easygoing, and have a cell phone that I can talk to someone on as soon as we wish to move the conversation to the phone. Likewise, I don't like people who are excessively private/secretive. M

_____________________________

a.k.a. SexyBossyBBW
""Touching was, and still is, and will always be, the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni

(in reply to SmackNMe)

Post #: 27

RE: It's really a MAN - 3/16/2007 10:23:49 PM

GoddessDustyGold

Posts: 2822
Joined: 4/11/2004
From: Arizona
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ExtremeMP

Have had several who were men posin as women in the past. Also had one who was very good at coming up with reasons for no phone or meet. Turned out she was married and using her MARRIED daughters pics as her own! Eventually caught up with her though in the long run.

Point is not all are men some are married and getting their kicks...

I agree...it is not always the male who is playing a game. However...
Herein lies the difference. I would not have the patience to be that persistent. The person would have already gone into My ignore mode. I think most of the Ladies I know have pretty much the same attitude. Each person takes their own amount of time, but a willingness to chat on IM, but refuse to follow through on a realtime meet is a red flag to Me. Unless people are happy with that status quo, of course.
I mean, honestly...for Me, why bother if it is not going to go to realtime?
I am so annoyed with My spacebar! These posts are taking way too long!

_____________________________

Dusty
They that give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety
B Franklin
Don't blame Me ~ I didn't vote for either of them
The Hidden Kingdom

(in reply to ExtremeMP)

Post #: 28

RE: It's really a MAN - 3/16/2007 11:08:50 PM

LadyHugs

Posts: 2299
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

Dear SmackNMe, Ladies and Gentlemen;

It is rather sad, that some individuals must play games and hurt people in their honest efforts finding a match.

What needs to be said though, independent of natural Women, there are those who identify as Women who are born men and may not completed their 'change.' There are those who have high pitches for men's voices so they can pull off a trick of the voice, posing as a Woman. There are those men who look more like real women--that is scary! So, even via phone, web cam --the real gender identity isn't known. Only real time meeting, the ability to interact with someone and references are the only considerations which may lead you to a 90% chance you are dealing with a natural Woman. Yet, you still must understand medically changed, men to women are legally identified as women.

Just some thoughts.

Respectfully submitted for consideration,
Lady Hugs

(in reply to SmackNMe)

Post #: 29

RE: It's really a MAN - 3/16/2007 11:11:40 PM

littlesarbonn

Posts: 1710
Joined: 12/3/2005
From: Stockton, California
Status: offline

I've never really had the kinds of problems people talk about with meeting people online. For me, I guess it has more to do with the fact that the people I interact with online are practically people I would have interacted with in real life as well. The current person I am seeing is someone who knows all of my friends because she has been in the community as long, or obviously longer, than I have, so when we met up online, we were essentially long lost friends who just had never met before. Most of the other people I converse with online are people I know from other areas of the community so that their online presence is only one presentation of themself.

That doesn't mean someone I've never heard of before can't become an attractive addition, but I'm a pretty plain person who doesn't do a lot of email tag before needing to actually meet someone in person, if that person is serious. If the person is not serious, then it doesn't really matter because being friends of the Internet is just one of those things that happens, but it rarely goes further than that for me if it's just Internet contact only.

_____________________________

<---- FYI, this picture looks JUST like me

http://www.littlesarbonn.com/Stickman/Stickman.htm
The Adventures of Stickman and the Unemployed Lego Spaceman

(in reply to GoddessDustyGold)

Post #: 30

RE: It's really a MAN - 3/17/2007 1:35:12 AM

hobbit9sub4u

Posts: 130
Joined: 10/29/2006
From: Bates Motel(florida)
Status: offline

i odtn see anythign wrong with asking for a phone call if your both ready, i myself hate to be on the phone or messenger to long, unless its with a good friend i generally prefer e-mails. i admit i am one to put off phoning anyone, i usually ask master to do it for me because i get so uncomfortable talkign over the phone.

that being said, i will say that the reason i hate it so much is because i sound liek a child, literally, ive had people call from different places(wantign me to switch long distance or cable companies, not that we have cable, lol) and as soon as i answer that ask in this sticky sweet voice, is your mommy or daddy home? oy.(to that i reply no, but would you liek to talk to my husband, im bad, hehehe) im just terrifyed that i wont be taken seriously by anyone i my want to talk to.

_____________________________

I may be schizophrenic, but at least I have each other, and when I am alone I am together.

(in reply to littlesarbonn)

Post #: 31

RE: It's really a MAN - 3/17/2007 4:42:14 AM

MistressFeathers

Posts: 121
Joined: 2/4/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DianeB269

I gave my phone number to a sub once and I'll never do it again. Phone calls at 1,2,and 3am.
No thanks!!!

I've had the same problem.
However, after a period of time when I feel comfortable I may be persauded to give it out so long as the receiver fully understands that I use my phone for work & a 3am phone call makes me think 'who has died?'

(in reply to DianeB269)

Post #: 32

RE: It's really a MAN - 3/17/2007 4:56:48 AM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressFeathers

quote:

ORIGINAL: DianeB269

I gave my phone number to a sub once and I'll never do it again. Phone calls at 1,2,and 3am.
No thanks!!!

This is exactly the reason why I do actually prefer cam rather than phone as a way of verifying identity. If I find I am not interested, I don't want My number out there. It's a lot less troubling to block someone from your IM than your phone.

I've had the same problem.
However, after a period of time when I feel comfortable I may be persauded to give it out so long as the receiver fully understands that I use my phone for work & a 3am phone call makes me think 'who has died?'

(in reply to MistressFeathers)

Post #: 33

RE: It's really a MAN - 3/21/2007 9:30:10 AM

subgrrl4u

Posts: 8
Joined: 3/15/2007
Status: offline

This has happened to me before where a man was possing as women. He was quite believable but had excuses for not being able to talk on the phone or meet. We corresponded via e-mail and chat for nearly 6 weeks when his he finally came clean and told me. It seems he had fallen in love with me and his conscience was bothering him. Long story short that ended the relationship and I learned a valuable lesson. If someone is who they say they are they should within a reasonable amount of time (most of the time a week or two) move forward in proving they are who they say they are. If someone tries to make you feel bad about asking or question why they have to prove anything to you.... run .....run like hell!!!!!

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 34

RE: It's really a MAN - 3/21/2007 9:34:02 AM

MuscleyandCute

Posts: 82
Joined: 9/23/2006
Status: offline

quote:

they deal with a hetero male sub that has been deceived by a man posing as a mistress. I want to continue seeking out a mistress but after a recent wake up call, I am reluctant. I found out a person I was IM'ing was really a man when he slipped up and exposed his gender on IM.

Is it wrong to ask a mistress to speak on the phone after about a week of talking back and forth

quote:

ORIGINAL: SmackNMe

I need to ask the mistresses here how they deal with a hetero male sub that has been deceived by a man posing as a mistress. I want to continue seeking out a mistress but after a recent wake up call, I am reluctant. I found out a person I was IM'ing was really a man when he slipped up and exposed his gender on IM.

Is it wrong to ask a mistress to speak on the phone after about a week of talking back and forth?

You might be a little inexperienced at this no offence meant at all, most male subs when they are new to all this are more trusting in human nature as they are going upon the standards of what they see in real life no doubt. This is a learning experience for you and your observational and precuational skills will be gradually honed to make you more aware.

(in reply to SmackNMe)

Post #: 35

RE: It's really a MAN - 3/21/2007 9:41:38 AM

SmackNMe

Posts: 13
Joined: 3/13/2007
Status: offline

thanks but i asked the Women.

(in reply to MuscleyandCute)

Post #: 36

RE: It's really a MAN - 3/21/2007 9:52:51 AM

MsKatHouston

Posts: 1909
Joined: 6/7/2006
From: Houston, TX
Status: offline

...and several men have already posted with their opinions which are also very valid. It is, after all a public board. As with any thread...take what works for you, leave the rest.

For my response:

It happens and unfortunately the Internet lends itself to such. Be wary but not completely distrusting. If after a time, you go to cam or phone, great. It should eventually, anyway. But don't get too invested into a "relationship" until you have passed some of the hurdles of verification and genuine meetings.

_____________________________

-Kat

~If you can't be a good example, you'll just have to serve as a horrible warning~

(in reply to SmackNMe)

Post #: 37

RE: It's really a MAN - 3/21/2007 10:08:48 AM

SmackNMe

Posts: 13
Joined: 3/13/2007
Status: offline

that's right and it's my right to want a woman's opinion in a women's forum with a question directed towards a woman, right?

after all, "it's a public board".

i want what i asked - a woman's opinion. deal with it or leave me be. and please save your corrections for someone else. save it.

(in reply to MsKatHouston)

Post #: 38

RE: It's really a MAN - 3/21/2007 10:14:10 AM

LadyEllen

Posts: 10931
Joined: 6/30/2006
From: Stourport-England
Status: offline

So, do I just give half an answer? I'm confused

E

_____________________________

In a test against the leading brand, 9 out of 10 participants couldnt tell the difference. Dumbasses.

(in reply to SmackNMe)

Post #: 39

RE: It's really a MAN - 3/21/2007 10:23:36 AM

SmackNMe

Posts: 13
Joined: 3/13/2007
Status: offline

aye, point taken!

(in reply to LadyEllen)

Post #: 40

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