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Anticipating Subspace or Sub Drop - 3/19/2007 7:57:18 PM   
vegassub777


Posts: 14
Joined: 3/11/2007
Status: offline 		I was wondering if there was any way to anticpate, before going into a scene, if one was going to float or drop.  I was with some friends the other night, and went into a scene really wanting to go into subspace, but that didn't happen, and it wasn't long before I dropped and was on the floor crying.  I know that everyone is different, but are there any ways to guage whether I will float or drop before I go into a scene?
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RE: Anticipating Subspace or Sub Drop - 3/19/2007 8:21:03 PM   
IrishMist


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Joined: 11/17/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: vegassub777

I was wondering if there was any way to anticpate, before going into a scene, if one was going to float or drop.  I was with some friends the other night, and went into a scene really wanting to go into subspace, but that didn't happen, and it wasn't long before I dropped and was on the floor crying.  I know that everyone is different, but are there any ways to guage whether I will float or drop before I go into a scene?

I doubt it.

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RE: Anticipating Subspace or Sub Drop - 3/19/2007 8:58:50 PM   
sublimelysensual


Posts: 298
Joined: 7/25/2005
Status: offline 		Let me preface this by saying, I would consider myself to be on the low-medium end of the experience gauge. That being said, I don't think there is a way to tell..I've experienced things I thought I would hate and absolutely loved them, and things I thought I would love and I just was so-so about. I think though, that to go into a scene with that kind of expectation..ie, expecting to space, or expecting to drop, probably has a negative effect on your reactions..I know if I went into a scene thinking..okay, this is going to make me space, I would probably be waiting on it and concentrating about it rather than letting myself fully experience what was going on..in other words, my attention would be split, and for me, that would make it hard to go anywhere. Hope that helps....

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RE: Anticipating Subspace or Sub Drop - 3/19/2007 9:10:11 PM   
slaveish


Posts: 1086
Joined: 2/19/2007
Status: offline 		There's no way to tell when you're going to drop, but if you can predict some winning lotto numbers I'd appreciate a private message.

I will tell you that when I want very badly to be in subspace and thus expect to get there, I can drop hard. Over-expectation is a real buzz-kill.

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If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other. ~~Mother Teresa

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RE: Anticipating Subspace or Sub Drop - 3/19/2007 9:43:23 PM   
veronicaboundcd


Posts: 101
Joined: 1/4/2005
Status: offline 		As far as my experiences go, I think there are too many variables to be able to predict either, but mind set and circumstances can play a big role.

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RE: Anticipating Subspace or Sub Drop - 3/19/2007 9:45:58 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: vegassub777
I was wondering if there was any way to anticpate, before going into a scene, if one was going to float or drop.  I was with some friends the other night, and went into a scene really wanting to go into subspace, but that didn't happen, and it wasn't long before I dropped and was on the floor crying.  I know that everyone is different, but are there any ways to guage whether I will float or drop before I go into a scene?

Not with any serious degree of accuracy.  There are things that very likely will put me into subspace and likely put me into subdrop.  I've learned this only after years of a wide variety of scenes from a wide variety of contexts.

Depending on whether I WANT that to occur and can handle it occuring, we generally try to avoid or go for those things.

And life is just funny so sometimes it doesn't matter and you have to deal as best you can.

Best overall is to make sure your physical preparation is taken care of- you've eaten and rested, you're not going to be under severe stress afterwards. 

Even if life does drop a few bombs on you, just remember that subspace and subdrop never killed anyone.  It may suck at the time, but it's a good learning experience for next time, or even just for that moment.

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RE: Anticipating Subspace or Sub Drop - 3/20/2007 3:50:25 AM   
ExSteelAgain


Posts: 1803
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Georgia
Status: offline 		Does a certain type of play cause you to space nicely? What type play most often causes you to space? From my experience flogging can have predictable results and most often ends in the sub spacing. It is easy to control the session and guide the sub to any stage because of the physical characteristics of the flogger working on such a wide area without the intense, biting pain of some implements. (Yeah, yeah, I know it still hurts.) The same thing with spanking, but less so. Cane, paddles and so on are far less predictable. In addition, certain activities may cause subdrop. If the sub is susceptible to intense fear of something, playing around it, may leave her in subdrop for a couple of days. Possibly you can learn to predict from the type activity the scene will entail. Good luck.

< Message edited by ExSteelAgain -- 3/20/2007 3:53:13 AM >

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RE: Anticipating Subspace or Sub Drop - 3/20/2007 5:14:43 AM   
kyraofMists


Posts: 3292
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline 		I don't even try to predict subspace because that is highly dependent on what he wants.  He knows the things that put me there and he knows the things that take/keep me out of it.  My responsibility is to be completely open and surrender to him and let him take me where he wants me to go.  It helps me to spend some quiet time alone letting go of life's distractions, focusing my mind on being in the moment and making sure that I am physically up to the play.

It is highly unusual for me to experience sub drop at all.  In reading the boards it seems that my idea of sub drop is different than other people.  My idea of sub drop is an out of control emotional spiral.  The act of crying during or after a scene does not equate to sub drop to me.  For me it is just a natural reaction to the stimulus and can be quite cleansing and uplifting.  I don't read anything more into it than that and I cry until I am done.  I don't consider being tired after a scene sub drop either, to me it is just a normal reaction to the physical reactions in play. 

I do a pretty good job at predicting sub drop for myself but then there are always those emotional triggers that get touched during play that you can't predict and those are capable of making me drop.  He once grabbed me just like my mother used to do when she spanked me and he hit me on the ass.  Since that time, I immediately start sobbing uncontrollably when he spanks me with a paddle; it dredges up memories of being a bad girl.  He tries to undermine the trigger by complimenting me while doing it and letting me know that he thinks I am a good girl and he continues to do this after play to help me not let the memories lead me to a negative headspace.  For now, he will not let anyone else use a paddle on me until we work past it.

Knight's kyra

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"Passion... it lies in all of us. Sleeping, waiting, and though unbidden, it will stir, open its jaws, and howl. It speaks to us, guides us... passion rules us all. And we obey..." ~Angelus

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RE: Anticipating Subspace or Sub Drop - 3/20/2007 5:43:03 AM   
CelticPrince


Posts: 3613
Joined: 4/15/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: vegassub777

I was wondering if there was any way to anticpate, before going into a scene, if one was going to float or drop. I was with some friends the other night, and went into a scene really wanting to go into subspace, but that didn't happen, and it wasn't long before I dropped and was on the floor crying. I know that everyone is different, but are there any ways to guage whether I will float or drop before I go into a scene?


vegassub,

You pose a good question and with any good question there is a good answer but it is one that is best suited to the individual person.

I believe that sublimy has come closest to the point. Les antisipation and more appreciation might work well for you.

Good Fortune

CP

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RE: Anticipating Subspace or Sub Drop - 3/20/2007 5:48:48 AM   
KnightofMists


Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline 		I do not consider it very constructive for a bottom to attempt to anticpate some sort of subspace or other wise.  I have always found it best if a bottom is prepared with an open-minded to accept what is and let what is be!  I have found that this kind of mindlessness into most types of plays will leave a person much more empowered and content from the play.  But, as I said this is most types of plays and this is plays with me.  Other's may get different results.

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An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

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RE: Anticipating Subspace or Sub Drop - 3/20/2007 6:22:42 AM   
Celeste43


Posts: 3066
Joined: 2/4/2006
From: NYS
Status: offline 		I only float from a long thuddy scene that isn't too painful for me.

However one thing that will help avert dropping is to consider what shape you are in before playing. Did you get a full night's sleep? Have you eaten that day, no junk food? Are you fully hydrated?

Then there's the emotional stuff. Is there some stress in your life that you can't solve or handle well, did you tell your top that this was going on so they could watch you. Do you feel like you're getting sick, a couple of times now I've wound up tensing during play and then falling apart and had it happen that the next day a full blown cold appeared.
Are there any issues between you and the top? If you're in a relationship and things aren't going well then clear the problems up first because play will make them worse.

Check in with your body, check in with your emotions. If you aren't in good shape when you start it's more likely you won't be in good shape when it ends.

(in reply to KnightofMists)
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RE: Anticipating Subspace or Sub Drop - 3/20/2007 7:09:30 AM   
Driver1961


Posts: 459
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline 		He dips His lid,

As others have said, triggers are  very individual which I thoroughly agree with but if you are publicly playing- have a trusted friend observe and relate later the Ds actions and your reactions.   Definately take note of fluids, prior mental state, hunger, tiredness, etc, etc....  Or if you play with the same Dom primarily- they will be able to give observations if pre-warned.

It is doubtful that you will be able to confidently predict but you will be able to detect some patterns that you give you better control on how 'Not to' rather than 'How to'. 

My thoughts are based on several in depth discussions with masochists, and subs in private and public play situations.

Sub-space is my only enviable action as a Dom....  but hell, I don't receive pain. (nope- not even a pinch on my nipple!)

Warm regards to all, Driver.

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RE: Anticipating Subspace or Sub Drop - 3/20/2007 12:01:53 PM   
mixielicous


Posts: 1283
Joined: 4/6/2006
From: Boston area, Massachusetts
Status: offline 		fast reply, not really in advance, but i can tell right before space is about to happen, i usually fall silent, and the pain is gone, and before i know it He hits me hard enough to bring the pain back and then send me into space.

i cant help with the drop coz i dont really experience it after sex unless i am drunk and feeling guilty about something, which is really just being drunk haha

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RE: Anticipating Subspace or Sub Drop - 3/20/2007 7:23:28 PM   
vegassub777


Posts: 14
Joined: 3/11/2007
Status: offline 		Thanks for your replies.  I have done some thinking about it, and I think the main thing is that I needed to be alone. I had spent quite a bit of time around people for about a day or so before that, and I need time alone to recharge, but didn't have the chance.  But your answers do give me much to think about as I continue on this journey.  Thank you.

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RE: Anticipating Subspace or Sub Drop - 3/20/2007 8:57:23 PM   
Sinergy


Posts: 9383
Joined: 4/26/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: IrishMist

quote:

ORIGINAL: vegassub777

I was wondering if there was any way to anticpate, before going into a scene, if one was going to float or drop.  I was with some friends the other night, and went into a scene really wanting to go into subspace, but that didn't happen, and it wasn't long before I dropped and was on the floor crying.  I know that everyone is different, but are there any ways to guage whether I will float or drop before I go into a scene?

I doubt it.


I have a different opinion about this, and i would ask that you not view me as being argumentative or insulting.

My question would be, why do you want to know?

This lifestyle provides people with a means to strip rational thought away and expose their inner, limbic system, self.  Please avoid the chanting and I am not looking for donations to my church.

The sub is put into a place where she/he has whatever done to her.  This causes glandular changes in her bloodstream.  Mental changes in her/his head.  His/her cognitive brain attempts to cope.  Her/his non-cognitive system basks in it's chemical soup and ponders/doesnt ponder it's existence.

The Dom is put into a place where He/She is doing things.  This also causes changes.  Etc.  The cognitive mind attempts to cope.

We have sub space and Dom space.

This is just me, but I dont see it (from a Dominant viewpoint) as something I have to micromanage.  Things are happening.  I know and am in control of what is happening for me, but my understanding is that my sub is seeking a place where he/she can just experience and not be in control.

There is a reason subspace and/or sub drop happens.  Wondering why seems like an attempt to control the situation, and I would personally recommend you not worry about "why."

Let it be...

Sinergy

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David St. Hubbins "This Is Spinal Tap"

"Every so often you let a word or phrase out and you want to catch it and bring it back. You cant do that, it is gone, gone forever." J. Danforth Quayle


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RE: Anticipating Subspace or Sub Drop - 3/20/2007 9:10:40 PM   
DiurnalVampire


Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline 		Not to any degree of acuracy, you cant tell if you are going to get into subspace or not.  Nor if you will drop.
We assume Angel will drop after our scenes, but that is from experiences that we have had often.  Unless you are playing with the same people who know what will trigger what responses, you are going to be hit and miss about every time.  Even when you do know someone well, it isnt 100%

DV

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RE: Anticipating Subspace or Sub Drop - 3/21/2007 5:13:15 AM   
imtempting


Posts: 1280
Joined: 2/11/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: mixielicous

fast reply, not really in advance, but i can tell right before space is about to happen, i usually fall silent, and the pain is gone, and before i know it He hits me hard enough to bring the pain back and then send me into space.


That happens to myself aswell. The person I used to play with said I would do pretty much what you said. Its a better high then xtc.. :whistles:

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RE: Anticipating Subspace or Sub Drop - 3/21/2007 9:26:01 AM   
junecleaver


Posts: 1145
Joined: 4/6/2005
Status: offline 		Not really.  I just try to let go and experience the scene.  He decides where we go and when.  Generally, he goes into a scene wanting me to reach 'subspace' which is kind of like this heady feeling that makes me quiet and makes the pain irrelevant.   The things I can do on my end that are essential in getting me to subspace:  -physically preparing myself for the sceneif I'm tired or hungry it doesn't happen-mentally preparing myself for the sceneI include a few minutes, usually spent in the bathroom, before a scene to make sure my head is clear and I can push away whatever happened that day.-focusing on himFor me, this means not focusing on the pain.  I'm not a masochist.  It doesn't feel good.  If I focus on it, then I just freak myself out and end up hyperventilating or something.  I have to focus on him--his pleasure and direction. If I haven't done these things, chances are I definitely won't reach the desired headspace.  I think they are really common things others do, you just have to figure out exactly how you should do them for yourself.

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