Collaring

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KarbonCopy -> Collaring (4/11/2005 12:26:47 AM)
I just got a simple question. I know that there is a great deal of pride that comes along with being collard, and there is a great deal of respect to the whole tradition. My Mistress and I met eachother and started dating before we got into our D/s relationship, we didnt eve know that eachother were into it. Then we did some soul searching and realized that I am sub and she is Domme. Now we're engaged, and thus the different degrees of collaring are useless, since we know that we're already spending the rest of our lives together. Is it frowned upon to just be "collard" Isnt that practically the same thing as becoming engaged? I mean without going through all the different types of collars? for us the only different collars I will wear is my "at home collar" and my "out and about collar for more social events" What are the publics perceptions on this?

SweetDommes -> RE: Collaring (4/11/2005 1:40:53 AM)
As far as I'm concerned, if it works for you then yay and congrats. To hell with what other people think of you. You are together, you are a stable relationship and you know where you both stand within that relationship - that is all that other people need to know.

KarbonCopy -> RE: Collaring (4/11/2005 2:26:56 AM)
True enough. I just hold the traditions and am a firm beliver that some things should still be respected, but thats just the old fashionist in me. But yes, if it works go with it right? I was just wondering what the general opinion is on this, since I've run into a great population of arrogant people that are obessed with things being to a strict rule guideline and use every definition as if they were some kind of Fetishit 10 commandments.

sf-Sub -> RE: Collaring (4/11/2005 2:36:22 AM)
What does she want? Do you want to be collared? If so, do you want a permanent collar? One can be collared several ways. • Just for play any type of collar you can imagine. • Certainly a classy looking neck chain that is locked on. Allows you to be collared but not look like a dog in public. • A locking anklet chain. • Some consider Chastity devices / belts a form of collaring. • Hell even a wedding or promise ring is a form of being collared. It is what she and you find safe, sane and consensual. If you do any kind of work, job or sports where a collar would get in the way then I would advise against anything that would be unsafe. If you are interested in collaring check the post out When should a sub be collared here on collarme.com

Oumae -> RE: Collaring (4/11/2005 8:01:34 AM)
KarbonCopy...it is what is right for your Mistress and you that counts. Don't worry about trying to fit into the boxes that some people think are so important. Enjoy yourselves. Oumae

ShiftedJewel -> RE: Collaring (4/11/2005 9:16:54 AM)
quote: KarbonCopy...it is what is right for your Mistress and you that counts. Don't worry about trying to fit into the boxes that some people think are so important. I totally agree! KarbonCopy, if it feels good, do it, if it feels REALY good, do it twice. Jewel

perverseangelic -> RE: Collaring (4/11/2005 9:19:53 AM)
Karbon- My situation is EXTREMELY similar to yours, except that I came into the relationship with a knowledge of who I am. Still our relationship progressed much as yours did. I wear my partners collar. Am I collared? I don't know, but I don't think so. It isn't really something that crossed our minds. I belong to him, and anything else is icing.

KarbonCopy -> RE: Collaring (4/11/2005 10:52:02 AM)
Well the collar wont be something I wear all the time like if i'm at work and stuff, but I suppose my engagement ring provides the same sort of ownership brand. lol

perverseangelic -> RE: Collaring (4/11/2005 11:29:29 AM)
nod I wear mine all the time, but then mine is semi-subtle and fits my style. It's mostly a fetish thing for me. I have a thing for locking/permanant collars/cuffs. My partner is willing to oblige. (incedentally a thousand good wishes to you)

KarbonCopy -> RE: Collaring (4/11/2005 11:43:37 AM)
Thanks ^__^ I appreciate the kindness :)

MaitresseEden -> RE: Collaring (4/11/2005 4:17:09 PM)
Like my quote says.. Define yourself for yourself..and that includes your relationships. I for one take collars extremely seriously, and in order for me to put one around a subs neck there had best be a ring around my finger. Others take the lightly and pop them on at first meeting,or pop then on and off just for an evening.. Be comfortable in what you have, define it for yourself and you will be much happier than trying to please the rest of the world. Ms. Eden

KarbonCopy -> RE: Collaring (4/11/2005 11:41:54 PM)
Yea I think its because I do take collaring seriously, and I hate seeing how people just use it as some sort of a ownership tag. Its more serious than that. Its like dating someone and just within two weeks getting engaged.

ManOwner -> RE: Collaring (4/14/2005 7:47:22 PM)
I agree with the people who say do what you want and don't worry about it. There's no reason you should care what I think, but I'll tell you anyway. For me, a collar represents humiliation and control, and it turns me on to use it - although it doesn't mean much without a leash. I in no way analogize it to a sign of ownership or committment a la wedding rings.

QnofH3arts -> RE: Collaring (4/27/2005 7:44:10 PM)
If I adhered to everyone else's rules and guidelines regarding how I "should" live this lifestyle, I would not be the one in charge anymore, now would I? I will make my own rules, thank you very much.

BeachMystress -> RE: Collaring (4/27/2005 8:26:03 PM)
I'm currently dealing with this as I'm about to collar my finacee. He started as my sub, became my boyfriend and has moved into the position of life partner. To me, the collaring is different than the engagement because it symbolizes a different/special area of our life. His collar will be worn 24/7 and only removed for medical necessity. http://www.bondagecollars.com/sdcc.htm While I can see how you'd feel that the engagement would negate the need for a collar, it is a symbolic reminder that you are more than her husband; you are her life-devoted submissive. It depends upon how you and she feel about it though. If it doesn't matter to the two of you.. then it doesn't matter. And yes, to me a collar holds the weight of an engagement. You've made a commitment to each other. In this day and age of disposable relationships, engagement, marriage, collars, commitment and forever don't mean very much it seems. To me they still do however and when I say I am collaring and marrying the man, it means I intend to be with this man for the rest of our lives.

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