Controversy in the BDSM world. Know of any?

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Controversy in the BDSM world. Know of any? - 3/26/2007 4:32:37 PM

Aji

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Hello. I am Aji. I am currently working on a speech that is controversial about the BDSM lifestyle. I am PRO for the lifestyle and I need to defend myself. Does anyone know of anything that can be controversial about this lifestyle?

Ex: Death can occur. How can I still defend my position about this?

What my main goal is to sway the audience to be PRO as well for the BDSM lifestyle. Or at least not have negative conotations about it and spit at the very idea. FYI: my speech is due tomorrow (Tuesday). So if anyone out there has some great controversy about this lifestyle, PLEASE SEND ME A MESSAGE OR REPLY! I will be in your debt. THANK YOU!

<3 Sub. Aji

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RE: Controversy in the BDSM world. Know of any? - 3/26/2007 5:57:59 PM

ShiftedJewel

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Death can also occur when driving, swimming, eating, have 'nilla sex... death happens, often when we least expect it.

Consensual slavery is very controversial, but the key word is consensual. For the most part the BDSM relationships are based on open and honest communication, something that a lot of couples would do well to learn. Many practice years to learn their skills, whether it be relationship skills or flogging skills and continue to hone them on a regular basis.

Just a thought... but there are a lot of people out there that live in denial for many reasons, family, religion, fear that their spouse will think there is something wrong with them, but in this lifestyle we aren't afraid to say what it is that we enjoy and want out of life, it's just what we do.

Jewel

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RE: Controversy in the BDSM world. Know of any? - 3/26/2007 5:59:49 PM

mantis65

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I am a sub but also a human so I was going to die anyway before the tragic face sitting or being crushed by powerful thigh incident. The tragic part is it can only happen once.
People die everyday during mundane things like work and sleeping. Better to go doing something I loved

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RE: Controversy in the BDSM world. Know of any? - 3/26/2007 9:48:56 PM

Aji

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ok so besides death (i knew everyone would focus on that) what about anything ELSE? Maybe religion? Or peers? (Dont focus on just those things in next replies).

Anything ELSE that can be controversial about this lifestyle?

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RE: Controversy in the BDSM world. Know of any? - 3/26/2007 10:50:45 PM

LadyAnnabelleLee

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Aji
Anything ELSE that can be controversial about this lifestyle?

Aji, it doesn't seem to me that you define "controversy" well. Have you even bothered picking up on that whole "slave" thing? Most 'nillas have a serious issue with a willing slave.

What about some of the fetishes? Gods know there's controversy abound what with looners (balloon fuckers), scat (not defining it.) and age play.

The controversy is knocking on your door kid. Answer it!

~Lady Annabelle Lee

P.S. WHY DID YOU WAIT UNTIL TODAY TO ASK?! Dummkopf!

_____________________________

It is the loud few that speak for the quiet many. ~Me

And neither the angels in heaven above,
Nor the demons down under the sea,
Can ever dissever my soul from the soul
Of the beautiful Annabel Lee.
~An excerpt from "Annabel Lee" by Edgar A

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RE: Controversy in the BDSM world. Know of any? - 3/26/2007 10:58:46 PM

DommeChains

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Pain....both the giving and receiving of it as a sexual gratification or sign of affection,devotion, et al. And I am curious as to why you would need to ask others for areas of controversy if you are involved in the lifestyle yourself. I thought we have all had to deal with the "wtf?" why do you do (fill in the blank) that? response at some point.

And I second LadyAnnabelle.....why did u wait so late?

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RE: Controversy in the BDSM world. Know of any? - 3/26/2007 11:14:50 PM

Aji

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iono lol why i did it so late. im quitting school and loosing motivation. but now i love the topic so it just hit me to ask. and i know that the things we do in the lifestyle maybe cause some ppl to say "wtf? why do u do that?" but im talking about BDSM itself. megotaive conotations. like, it owuld be against some religions, taboo. such and such u know? just wondering what else is out there. since i see nothing wrong with it, its hard to point out the bad things. but thank u all for replying!

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RE: Controversy in the BDSM world. Know of any? - 3/27/2007 2:16:05 AM

Lashra

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BDSM is (supposedly) against the norms of society, against the laws of many places, it goes against some religions and it goes against human nature (some say). So, yeah lots of controversy to be found in the BDSM world. Pain, death, mental anguish, are all possibilities. But then again aren't they found in other aspects of life? You betcha.

~Lashra

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RE: Controversy in the BDSM world. Know of any? - 3/27/2007 8:53:04 AM

undergroundsea

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Aji
ok so besides death (i knew everyone would focus on that) what about anything ELSE? Maybe religion? Or peers? (Dont focus on just those things in next replies).

As others have said, death can occur under a variety of circumstances. Against this point, I would point out other activities people do for fun that can lead to death (motorcycle riding, etc.) And I would point out that death is not common in BDSM activities, and a majority of activities in BDSM do not create a higher risk of death.

I am not quite clear on what you seek with your examples of religion and, especially, peers when you speak of aspects of BDSM which can be controversial. In particular, the reference to peers leaves me unclear.

In any case, I gave a presentation about BDSM before a class. Here are some general ideas:

While defending BDSM, I would do it in a way so that the audience does not become defensive.

I think it helps to speak in terms that the audience can understand and describe feelings to which they can relate. I would draw analogies between my BDSM feelings and everyday feelings.

Cheers,

Sea

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RE: Controversy in the BDSM world. Know of any? - 3/28/2007 1:41:00 AM

MsCfromMelbourne

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BDSM makes some feminists very, very cross indeed

Have a look through this article for some ideas why ithe "lifestyle" is controversial. The author really poses the question is BDSM really "Stockholm Syndrome"
http://bitingbeaver.blogspot.com/2006/01/bdsm-from-bbs-perspective.htm l
The comments afterwards have lots of pros and cons - if you can stomach it!

< Message edited by MsCfromMelbourne -- 3/28/2007 1:42:59 AM >

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RE: Controversy in the BDSM world. Know of any? - 3/28/2007 1:43:44 AM

MsCfromMelbourne

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For example

Pretending that the wielding of power on one hand and the accepting of vulnerability on the other can be sequestered apart from one another such that one resides in one person and vice versa is childish. Period. If you want a good, healthy, and mature relationship, you'd damned well better be prepared to accept both. If you are naive enough to think that these two things can be teased apart and made to reside in completely separate bodies, if you can't grasp the idea that you will be simultaneously vulnerable and powerful in any close relationship, then don't have one.

BDSM is a way for the submissive to refuse to acknowledge that they are responsible for what happens to them, and it's a way for the dominant to refuse to acknowledge that they are also vulnerable. They can pretend for a moment, or an hour, or however long, that this is the case. It's not. Denial is never healthy. Denial coupled with sex is a seriously bad idea."

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<----- Corset, mask and collar designed and manufactured by metalsmith Karl H, chromed and lined in black suede. Masks and collars available from http://www.lucreziadesade.com.au/default.html. Corsets custom made only

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RE: Controversy in the BDSM world. Know of any? - 3/28/2007 7:42:12 AM

darkinshadows

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Aji

Hello. I am Aji. I am currently working on a speech that is controversial about the BDSM lifestyle. I am PRO for the lifestyle and I need to defend myself. Does anyone know of anything that can be controversial about this lifestyle?

Ex: Death can occur. How can I still defend my position about this?

What my main goal is to sway the audience to be PRO as well for the BDSM lifestyle. Or at least not have negative conotations about it and spit at the very idea. FYI: my speech is due tomorrow (Tuesday). So if anyone out there has some great controversy about this lifestyle, PLEASE SEND ME A MESSAGE OR REPLY! I will be in your debt. THANK YOU!

<3 Sub. Aji

Above anything else, I would suggest you do not look at the speech as one of defense. Why defend something that has no need to be defended? There is nothing wrong with BDSM and taking it as defending yourself, can lead to an attack / defense mode and that isn't healthy. Debate on the other hand is cool.

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RE: Controversy in the BDSM world. Know of any? - 3/28/2007 8:06:08 AM

KatyLied

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Another controversial thing is that some people gravitate to the lifestyle in order to "fix" themselves. They find the pain part to be cathartic or reliving certain events (such as abuse or rape) as therapeutic.

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