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Complications? - 4/2/2007 10:25:15 PM

Devilslilsister

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I was just laying in bed daydreaming about making my Dom's life perfect. Starts out that we would move back in together (this time his place and not mine) and i would keep it perfect. Dunno, something about keeping HIS place absolutetly perfect gives me a feeling of happiness. I could go on and on about why that would be grand, but i'll spare you all the details. I dont usually get past the daydream of keeping his place perfect because well i dun need to.

But i started thinking. Wouldnt it be grand if i could make his life perfect? Absolutetly fricken perfect. Right down to the last i dotted and T crossed.

Except, i'm a realist and i have needs outside of making things perfect. These "needs" are totally screwing with my daydream. i know i need certian things to keep me going, like postive reinforcement things. i know that the more you take on, the bigger the need gets. If the need is filled, exshaustion and other factors dont really play in. The bigger need just complicates things. = ( HOW would i go about making his life absolutetly perfect, if i would need so much from him? hmmmmmm. You'd think that it almost defeats the purpose.

i am realising that having needs, COMPLICATES things. Totally complicates things. What a pain in the butt. Wouldnt it be nice if we were all needless? The sky would be the limit of what we could do. Gah, we could go around making everyones life perfect. Do you think it'd be possible to run out of things to do if you didnt have to worry about filling your own needs? I think being needless would totally cut down on worry and stress too.

Wouldnt it be lovely? i think it'd be the ideal life. Except, i dont think its possible to make it a reality. The need to sleep puts a total damper on available time. I dont think its even possible function on solely extreme basic needs. There is always some sort of need - the need to be smiled at, the need to connect with another, the need to laugh... gah so many needs. Always some sort of lame need to mess up my daydream. Heck, even the need to submit messes it up.

yeah i'm totally dissing needs atm - they're majorly messing up my daydream. i wish i could continue my daydream and incorporate in "being needless" - but that just makes the daydream ludicrious to me.

i wonder...... is it an achievable goal? To become needless? Anyone else achieved that goal? Is it any way shape or form plausible so i can write it down on my To Do list?

Needs IMO are a pain in the BUTT.

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RE: Complications? - 4/2/2007 10:50:04 PM

santalia

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greetings...

i'm not certain how to really respond to your questions, other than to say there is basically only one way to become needless and that is to cease to exist. Since that is not the ideal circumstance, we must then deal with our needs as best as we can while still focusing on our One. Perhaps trying to make your needs work themselves out would be the answer here. There are needs He will be constantly aware of. If you're an affectionate person, He will see that on a regular basis, and affection to an affectionate person is a definite need. But, there are other needs He doesn't need to be constantly aware of, such as if you're a neat freak. If you feel a need to keep a place immaculately clean, you can be certain to get your cleaning fetish satisfied while He is out of the house, say at work, and then focus on His needs while He is there.

Another thing to consider, is the fact that meeting His needs can also meet your own needs. You feel a need to serve Him, to be certain He is well cared for. As you serve Him, as you care for Him, you are meeting that need.

i hope this helps...

well wishes

-santalia{JR}t

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RE: Complications? - 4/3/2007 2:51:00 AM

Valyraen

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I've considered having a perfect life before... and, quite frankly, I'd be bored off my ass. Life without any stress or challenge or problems would be an endless monotone of sunshine and rose petals, and I think that might just drive me mad after about a week. I need the intellectual stimulation of change and complication, even if I don't always welcome it into my life with outstretched arms.

If variety is the spice of life and I'm a guy that likes Cajun cookin'... well, I think you see where I'm going.

Valyraen

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RE: Complications? - 4/3/2007 3:23:04 AM

gypsygrl

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I love reading your posts/threads.

quote:

Except, i'm a realist and i have needs outside of making things perfect. These "needs" are totally screwing with my daydream. i know i need certian things to keep me going, like postive reinforcement things. i know that the more you take on, the bigger the need gets. If the need is filled, exshaustion and other factors dont really play in. The bigger need just complicates things. = ( HOW would i go about making his life absolutetly perfect, if i would need so much from him? hmmmmmm. You'd think that it almost defeats the purpose.

Brilliant insight. :)

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RE: Complications? - 4/3/2007 6:41:27 AM

onestandingstill

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I honestly think our needs in our relationship can solidify our relationships if dealt with properly.
It's in seeing your partner care about your needs you build trust. It's in meeting your partners needs you submit to him.
Even though they do cause heat sometimes they are an essential element in life that can in a healthy relationship forge stronger paths between the two of you.
suzanne

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RE: Complications? - 4/3/2007 6:44:36 AM

slavejali

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Well as the Buddhists say "Desire is the cause of all suffering"

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RE: Complications? - 4/3/2007 7:18:28 AM

LuckyAlbatross

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I think it's simply life showing us the lesson again and again to accept who we our in all our imperfections.

Most people, especially perfectionists, get very upset at things that they cannot control and things which limit their abilities. They rage against it and can become very self centered in their perspective on how they need to provide it all, they need to provide it all right now, and they need to provide it all perfectly.

Life can be a great lesson teacher in how to simply relax, stop being so focused on self, and just be who we are.

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RE: Complications? - 4/3/2007 9:42:53 AM

Devilslilsister

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quote:

"Desire is the cause of all suffering"

Ya know, and i'm really starting to believe that. Not just know it, but believe it. I mean really, think on a large scale here. If humans didnt have needs.... we wouldnt have alot of bad crap out there happening.

We could end all human suffering.

Do you all see how bad all this need stuff is? Good Lord!

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RE: Complications? - 4/3/2007 9:54:19 AM

crouchingtigress

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why does it make a differnece of his house or yours....why did you all move apart the first time?

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