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onestandingstill -> RE: When did your bondage interest begin? (4/11/2007 12:29:32 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: MsParados
quote:
ORIGINAL: onestandingstill
Unrelated to sensual context I imagined when I was little (say around 5) that I could feel ropes holding my crossed wrists over my head and across my crossed ankles much like I was a slave in a boat tied into my little thin bed.
It was a great comfort to lay in that position and pretend I was tied into my bed for the night.
suzanne
I am always amazed by non sexual bondage.... my interested lay in other areas so that idea is completely abstract to me... If I may ask about your opinion about why bondage gives you a feeling of security?
I think when I was a kid it was on the lines of a baby being swaddled in their receiving blanket.
The restraint (in my mind) had a calming effect as the imagined ropes protected me somehow.
Now as an adult the aspects of non sexual bondage that just hits me hard is the helplessness I have and the trust exchange.
I- I'm a full control freak of me and my actions and responses.
I have a very hard time just letting go and letting things happen without thinking about it.
2-I'm a very strong girl physically.
In reality most of the time in a one on one exchange I can take my will back and regain control of myself and my body in most situations.
To start with I think it's TPE at one of it's highest peaks.
It's a journey of my spirit completely releasing my body to the care of someone I can entrust it to.
Being tied tight affirms I have given full and absolute control over to another human being.
Even if it's only for an hour.
It's one hour more than I've been able to just let go before BDSM.
I am not and can not control anything.
Basically not responsible thus not in charge,
That alone is a very new and liberating feeling for me.
Sometimes I get so sick of diligently being responsible for all my actions & responses.
It's rare in my life that I've had someone who didn't crumble when I needed to count on them.
It's nice to just let go and float in someone else's care and plan for me knowing I'm safe even though I really have no control or say in anting unless the other person concedes to let me.
I also totally enjoy the exercise of vulnerability and being able to trust this other person with my life literally and not have that cause me any emotional pain.
Even though bondage isn't for really long periods of time the little bursts of completely trusting my life in the hands of the person who's bound me helps me with my trust issues I have toward humanity.
It shows me and re-affirms not all want to only take from me what they can get, not all want to hurt me, and I indeed can lean on someone and enjoy the experience without it hurting me emotionally or being let down or disappointed.
It's also a confidence and self esteem builder for me.
I was a gymnast in my youth.
I'm very very flexible.
It's quite a challenge to be tied in some drastic positions.
Knowing I can go farther than lots of people due to my flexibility & the notion I'm not claustrophobic at all makes it a journey of pride for me too.
There's so very many things about bondage for me that unrelated to sexual exchanges that hit into the very core of me.
Over all restraint equates to a new found freedom for me.
suzanne
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