Collarme sting-a-long (Full Version)

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RazorJAK -> Collarme sting-a-long (4/12/2007 2:03:51 AM)

Let's do a sing-a-long ...

At the club I semi-frequent,  there's a night called "Kinky Kareoke".  Take known songs and fudge the lyrics up a bit. 

I'll start off with "Be My Slave"  sung to the tune of "Be our guest".  And we all know about ten different "doms" this one can be directed towards.

Be My Slave
---
Need a slave! Need a slave!
Need a sub who will behave
Must be keen to learn, well mannered and
A lass I can deprave
Online chat
D/s play
Want to know me? That's the way!
Then, if you do not appall me
I might even let you call me
Real life meets? So one hopes
I must show you all the ropes
Let me tell you the behaviours that I crave
And if I list them out
I should leave little doubt
I need a slave
Need a slave
Be my slave

Anal plugs
Bondage (light)
Bondage (heavy, day-and-night)
Masturbation, penetration
The occasional hard bite
Being lent
Getting laid
Chores and serving as a maid
Exhibitionism, beating
Controlled bathroom use and eating
Cattle prods! Anal play
Lots of sex, both straight and gay
And of course I would require you to shave
If that sounds good to you
Come on and join the queue
To be my slave
Be my slave
Be my slave

Be my slave! Be my slave!
And your pathway I will pave
I can pay to ease your way
Right from the cradle to the grave
Full time job? College fees?
Work at anything you please
Pocket money, per requirement
And a fund for your retirement
Rent free stay, use of car
I can really take you far
And all that you have to do is catch the wave
It can be really great
To have a Dominate
So be my slave, be my slave, be my slave

Be my slave, be my slave
I'm no bounder, cad or knave
You can play in perfect safety
In your cosy little cave
I'll be firm, I'll be kind
All your needs I'll keep in mind
From emotional to sexual
(What do you mean, "intellectual"?)
Like a flower you can bloom
You'll have lots of growing room
Though of course your independence you must waive
Now surely such a deal
Is bound to have appeal
To any slave
Be a slave
Be my slave!

Folks can be derisive
To a Dom with no submissive
He's not whole without a role he can assume
Ah, you say, I have my wife and children?
Yes, but they have lost their springlike bloom
Journals I've been trolling
And communities enrolling
In my quest to find the bestest sub around
Who could know that folks would be so boorish?
Carping, mean and mocking
Well, I find that rather shocking!

"Need a slave? Need a slave?
Sorry, cannot do that, Dave!
You're a swine who's out of line
Now please don't whine or misbehave"
Is that so? They shall see
They should not have messed with me!
I won't be the one to blink first
I shall teach them all to think first!
I shall sue Six Apart
Till they hand them down a lart
They'll be banned without a chance their blogs to save
Then I'll resume my search
Until I find my virtuoso slave
Be my slave
Be my slave
Please, be my slave!!!





Najakcharmer -> RE: Collarme sting-a-long (4/12/2007 2:07:24 AM)

**applauds with delight**  Me likey!

By the way, that's called "filk".  Google for the term and you might find much that pleases you, though most of it won't specifically be kinky. 




RazorJAK -> RE: Collarme sting-a-long (4/12/2007 10:22:35 AM)


*chuckles*

Oh, trust me sweety,  I know filk.  One can't go to a single dragon*con without learning what that is.  I tickled Tom Smith's funnybone when I told him that I was humming "Crystal Gayle kills Frank Heinlein." when she played here last summer.

On one of the old (now defunct) BDSM forums I was a member of,  the sigfile I used was a line from Tom Smith's PQR.

But I'm glad you like the tweaking.  I can't lay claim to the lyrics.  They just seemed so fitting.




lilsquaw -> RE: Collarme sting-a-long (4/12/2007 10:39:27 AM)

giggles, that was fabulous. 




Najakcharmer -> RE: Collarme sting-a-long (4/12/2007 10:49:54 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: RazorJAK
Oh, trust me sweety,  I know filk.  One can't go to a single dragon*con without learning what that is.  I tickled Tom Smith's funnybone when I told him that I was humming "Crystal Gayle kills Frank Heinlein." when she played here last summer.


What, not Crystal Gayle on Arrakis?  You know, the good old favorite, "Don't it make my brown eyes blue"?  LOL

See you at DragonCon.  :)




RazorJAK -> RE: Collarme sting-a-long (4/12/2007 11:06:17 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Najakcharmer

See you at DragonCon.  :)



I'll be the 6'2" redhead man with hellboy facial hair, wearing a kilt and thong-eyepatch.  I'll be easy to find.  Just figure out where the Devil's Panties/In the Puddle booth is and I'll most likely be there.

Except for when I'm getting pirates drunk,
or playing Hired Goon for the 6'0" redhaired leather amazon  who I swear is a reincarnation of Boedicca ,
or molesting Voltaire and/or Rogue,
or ...

Y'know,  dragon*con pictures are why I could never go into politics.  ;-)






Hanable -> RE: Collarme sting-a-long (4/12/2007 6:13:19 PM)

wow... that is a nice version of the song... not child approperate.. but then again this site isnt either.. if i can get a song together ill post it.. i swear i will.

H >:)




phoenixinchains -> RE: Collarme sting-a-long (4/15/2007 3:04:22 AM)

lauphing my little welted butt off,,,  more please?     Phoenix




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