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ORIGINAL: jthorne


Psssh. A true dominant realizes it's all about the submissive. I agree with whoever said these people have never been in real relationships.

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ORIGINAL: WhiplashSmile

Just drop their mirror in swimming pool and watch 'em drown...  I myself actually have a very low tolerence for Narcissistic people especially Dom/mes.  In fact they tend to provoke a sadistic deeply sarcastic side in me, where I want to reach inside their mind and crush it for the empty beer can that it is.   I actually get off on, enjoy or take pleasure in humilating, shaming or otherwise verbally putting these types in their place. 

Don't get me wrong I believe in a healthy ego, but anybody who is so in Love with themselves that they can't see past their wonderful image they are seeing in their own mirror..  Grrrrrrrrrrrrr...

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ORIGINAL: Evanesce

I will freely admit I'm every bit a narcissist.  And I'm a slave.  I'm also a dominant woman.  My life IS all about me, but in being all about me, it takes the form of service to one and domination of others, because that's what makes ME happy.  In serving the Kaptin, my need to be caretaker is met.  In surrendering control of my life to Him, my need to be "reined in" is met.  In dominating others, my need for power is met.

Even though every scenario in my life is, on the surface, a give-and-take situation... it's all driven by what I need in order to feel fulfilled.  If I didn't need it, it wouldn't be happening. 

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ORIGINAL: BayouSub

This does not just apply to dominant males.  There is significant narcissim among dominant females. 

For me, a dom/sub relationship is symbiotic, that is, both parties benefit from the relationship.  Dommes have a tendency to forget this because the ratio of subs to dommes so favors them.  Frankly, I find some domme profiles absolutely insulting. 

Dominants would do well to remember that their power orientation does not make them smarter, better looking or physically stronger than submissives.  It does not give any greater weight to their opinions. 

I choose to submit because it is something that I enjoy and is consistent with my nature.  I assume that dominants enjoy my submission or they would not engage in it.    I don't think submission is a gift because a gift implies that I get nothing in return and I get much in return from submission.   I assume that the dominant enjoys being in control as much as I enjoy submitting to that control and, thus, they are not giving me a gift.  They are enjoying themselves and, if that is not the case, they are submissive rather than dominant  (IMHO).

Bottom line:  I consider dominance and submission a MUTUAL thing.  It's not all about the dominant and it's not all about the submissive. It's about both.  The best relationships, in my opinion, happen when each party recognizes this mutuality.

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ORIGINAL: Lillithsdream

I've been on CM for a long time now....met and talked with many Dom/masters.
The one characteristic I find extremely prevalent, is narcissism. Repeatedly I kept hearing their needs, their wants...what they seek sexually, what they expect in RL, like housework, contributing monetary, on and on. Why? Don't they realize since it is a power exchange it's not all about them? It's about the "us" factor? What do they have to offer? Everyone has different styles....to me wiping the board clean, totally, before each relationship is the way to go, not to be compared to anyone. Narcissism is indeed a mental disorder....and it seems big time in BDSM. I have switch tendencies...man...do I feel giving some of these doms a good flogging~!