GoddessDustyGold
Posts: 2822
Joined: 4/11/2004
From: Arizona
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quote:
ORIGINAL: Olias
As a sub guy mainly into body worship I have predictably become adept at such tasks as foot, bottom and pussy worship & I am told that I am most satisfactory at all three but I am still not popular with ladies within the BDSM scene (the ones that I have been to find that is).
Please explain to me someone, If I am completely compliant in times of submission and if I perform my physical duties well then why is it that once a domme finds out that I am not looking for intercourse then I am dropped like a stone.
I thought BDSM was NOT about sex!!
My fantasy remains that I am available for the use, convenience and amusement of a lady, I am completely submissive, I attack my physical tasks with application and gusto and in finale, I seek nothing for myself, although this is, of course, the decision of the lady, and I am quite happy to be sent away once I have given the required service & hopefully pleasure so why, do many ladies run a mile simply because I want only this scenario & no intercourse.
Do many of the domme ladies need to feel tht their sub wants them?
Is the whole domme/sub thing based on the understaning that the sub wants sex & submits out of desperation for this.
Help me understand please.
Where are all the domm ladies in the North-East?
Bold emphasis Mine...
Well, the mental and emotional dynamic is not normally based upon the sexual activities. Yet you emphasize that the activites you are submissive with and satisfactory in, such as bottom and pussy worship are important and seem to make up the whole of your offerings in a D/s or M/s relationship. It sounds like these activites are what make up your ability to submit. I realize you state you are mainly into body worship, but Methinks, this might be pretty much all you are into. Examine yourself to see if you have an attitude regarding other areas of service. Do you come across with an impatient and resentful attitude. Are you only doing other limited areas of service in order to get to the "prize"?
Please look again at what you wrote. I can only give My take on this., but I do feel that you are saying you are happy to be involved with oral sex and ass worship. Throw in a little foot worship (Agreed that most Ladies do enjoy a good foot massage ! *Smile*) and you are content and expect to be sent away after you have disapatched these important duties.
You also state, quite clearly, that you are "completely compliant in times of submission". What are "times of submission"? You are supposed to be submissive at all times in all things.
You may be having a problem bcause you seem to be viewing this as an opportunity (yes, I know you say you seek nothing for yourself) to participate in oral sex, and ass worship and you can provide some nice foot worship, but in other things, are you compliant also? Are you even interested in a relationship? A relationship that is based upon your submission at all times and in all circumstances to the Lady who might choose you? Or are you submissive when you are ordered to get your tongue ready, but when it is time to iron or do the dishes you are less than compliant in your submission? I might be reading this wrong, but it is what I am seeing in your lament here.
Some Ladies enjoy intercourse and expect it. Other do not. Some Ladies do not expect or want oral and ass worship either. You are making assumption here that all FemDoms want you to use is a talented tongue and then they will send you on your merry way, while they get up and make the bed. Most of the Ladies I know, on a personal level, are not really interested in intercourse with their slaves. And if they are, they can certainly get it with the snap of a finger and it would be their right, as the Domina, to thank you for your initial service and then have you straighten out the bed and greet the main course at the door. *Shrug* I am not saying this is what most Ladies will do. I am saying they can, and if you have more on the ball than a talented tongue, your lack of interest in sexual interxcourse might not be offputting at all. Those seeking a cuck might be more inclined to keep you around in that capacity. Although, even with that, a cuck is usually a humiliated and deprived boy who longs to serve with intercourse but is not good enough to do so. Seems you wouldn't be feeling deprived since you have no interest in the first place. I'm just saying...
I do not think that this has much to do with your lack of interest in intercourse and more to do with the fact that you think a talented tongue is enough to keep you around. Be grateful that you have enough of that particular talent that you can be used and thrown away. It is what most boys prefer. But if you are seeking something deeper and more permanent, then you need to find the Lady who is willing to accept those times as your "times of submission", and compromise with you on who is in charge the other 95% of the time. If you are even around the other 95% of the time.
Just one Domina's POV.
Edited to add a bit about your OP title: It crack Me up to continually realize that males seems to think that oral worship and ass worship is not sex or sexual. IT IS! A lack of penile to vaginal contact does not make a realtionship non-sexual. I would consider your offerings of submission to be just as sexual as intercourse.
< Message edited by GoddessDustyGold -- 4/13/2007 11:28:14 AM >
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Dusty
They that give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety
B Franklin
Don't blame Me ~ I didn't vote for either of them
The Hidden Kingdom
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I thought it wasn't about SEX - 
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