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smcontrol -> The Web & D/s (4/19/2007 9:48:45 PM)

I found D/s before there was an internet so the information was limited to say the least.  I didn't know there was a name for it even.  We called it "doing what I say" way back then.  BTW they were called "albums" way back then.....laughing.  This was before anyone would ever seriously mention "children" as a limit because the entire concept of not having sex with children seemed to be kind of implied as part of being an adult.  But anyway...

When the internet really exploded suddenly there were all these people out there who had some of the same feelings and thoughts and Ideas and it was amazing, to me at least.  Just the shear NUMBERS of U/us were amazing and I found some people who had been around a while setting up informative sites for no other reason than to share and with what I found to generally be a sincere desire to teach.

Then at some point I bumped into a chat site and people were having online relationships which at first I pronounced to be silly and then realized there were lots of reasons they were into the relationship that way and it was really fairly silly for a man who gets off from the site of a well whipped bottom or the like to say that anyone elses deal was either silly OR sane.

Then at some point there seemed to be some who started to believe there were right and wrong ways to do everything.  People were referred to as being "real" or "wannabes" or "not true" (as in if you were a TRUE submissive you'd be happy to let me piss down your throat).  And I'm not talking about the right way to safely perform some particular act or fetish or whatever so you didn't kill or injure your girl.  I'm talking more about the "How many submissives can dance on the head of a pin in Heaven" kind of discussions.  Suddenly if the girl called herself a slave she had to be into "no rights at all" while submissives were "allowed some choices."  What if she just thought the word slave was hotter?

Once as a joke I posted a thread on a D/s site stating that I was no longer allowing my slave to vote and that moving forward she would vote in the election for who I told her to vote for.  It flamed immediately and I was both heralded as a "real" Dom, ridiculed for being insecure, and was referred to a number of sites on the general themes of "when sadism becomes abuse."

My only point is that all of these ideas and concepts are all theory until you are involved in an active D/s based deal and then it all has to do with the two people and how they make it work.  Just like in the so called straight (or vanilla) world.  For me it's always been about the girl and how she responds and thinks about the things I teach and train her to do for me...  It's not like ten strokes of the cane is boring and eleven is hot right?  It's about her threashold and how she feels about giving me the gift of her pain.  And it's not like the humiliation she accepts (yes I know the theory that nothing you do for your Master is humiliating) has to be some certain something all the time.

Then again this entire rambling post could be an example of the thing I am whinning about. Or it could be I had to write a check to the IRS a couple of days ago and still havn't gotten to that happy I'm only paying taxes because I made some money last year place.

Just a thought.

Michael





The world breaks everyone and afterward many are strong in the broken places. But those that will not break it kills. It kills the very good and the very gentle and the very brave impartially. If you are none of these you can be sure it will kill you too but there will be no special hurry.
Ernest Hemingway, A Farewell to Arms, 1929



slavejali -> RE: The Web & D/s (4/19/2007 11:28:34 PM)

I'm not quite sure if I'm getting the purpose of your topic, unless its just to say, "The itnernet can be a good source of information exchange and at the same time don't get caught up in the internet world of bdsm cuz it can be really..umm...odd?" hehe

I've done the internet bdsm chat sites, its a very very odd world where a sense of humor is deemed unslavish, types of play genrally accepted within real world bdsm are deemed "too extreme" and even "abusive". I think what you got to remember is, internet bdsm chats are full of vanillas people with kinky ideas who have never once stepped into a dungeon, never lived within a face to face master/slave dynamic, yet an entire typed bdsm pop culture has emerged full of all its rules and regulations that may have nothing at all to do with really living it.

Anyways..wanted to respond to you since you spent the time to write a topic...its all good in the end hey? Whatever floats peoples boats, don't sweat it and condolences on the IRS cheque.[:)]



MasterGremlin -> RE: The Web & D/s (4/20/2007 12:16:06 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: smcontrol

I found D/s before there was an internet so the information was limited to say the least.  I didn't know there was a name for it even.  We called it "doing what I say" way back then.  BTW they were called "albums" way back then.....laughing.  This was before anyone would ever seriously mention "children" as a limit because the entire concept of not having sex with children seemed to be kind of implied as part of being an adult.  But anyway...

When the internet really exploded suddenly there were all these people out there who had some of the same feelings and thoughts and Ideas and it was amazing, to me at least.  Just the shear NUMBERS of U/us were amazing and I found some people who had been around a while setting up informative sites for no other reason than to share and with what I found to generally be a sincere desire to teach.

Then at some point I bumped into a chat site and people were having online relationships which at first I pronounced to be silly and then realized there were lots of reasons they were into the relationship that way and it was really fairly silly for a man who gets off from the site of a well whipped bottom or the like to say that anyone elses deal was either silly OR sane.

Then at some point there seemed to be some who started to believe there were right and wrong ways to do everything.  People were referred to as being "real" or "wannabes" or "not true" (as in if you were a TRUE submissive you'd be happy to let me piss down your throat).  And I'm not talking about the right way to safely perform some particular act or fetish or whatever so you didn't kill or injure your girl.  I'm talking more about the "How many submissives can dance on the head of a pin in Heaven" kind of discussions.  Suddenly if the girl called herself a slave she had to be into "no rights at all" while submissives were "allowed some choices."  What if she just thought the word slave was hotter?

Once as a joke I posted a thread on a D/s site stating that I was no longer allowing my slave to vote and that moving forward she would vote in the election for who I told her to vote for.  It flamed immediately and I was both heralded as a "real" Dom, ridiculed for being insecure, and was referred to a number of sites on the general themes of "when sadism becomes abuse."

My only point is that all of these ideas and concepts are all theory until you are involved in an active D/s based deal and then it all has to do with the two people and how they make it work.  Just like in the so called straight (or vanilla) world.  For me it's always been about the girl and how she responds and thinks about the things I teach and train her to do for me...  It's not like ten strokes of the cane is boring and eleven is hot right?  It's about her threashold and how she feels about giving me the gift of her pain.  And it's not like the humiliation she accepts (yes I know the theory that nothing you do for your Master is humiliating) has to be some certain something all the time.

Then again this entire rambling post could be an example of the thing I am whinning about. Or it could be I had to write a check to the IRS a couple of days ago and still havn't gotten to that happy I'm only paying taxes because I made some money last year place.

Just a thought.

Michael







The world breaks everyone and afterward many are strong in the broken places. But those that will not break it kills. It kills the very good and the very gentle and the very brave impartially. If you are none of these you can be sure it will kill you too but there will be no special hurry.
Ernest Hemingway, A Farewell to Arms, 1929



Pretty much my experience with the internet and D/s to a T. One point of observation on top of this: It's not limited to D/s type of people. I've spent the last 8 years doing internet marketing (this is a way of getting paid for your internet addiction) and have seen the exact same scenario played out in 4 industries and 6 different hobbies. It's just how the web works.

MG



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