The good submissive

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MariaB -> The good submissive (4/20/2007 8:08:58 AM)
I am a lifestyle dominant and I am very specific in what I look for in a submissive. I wanted to put it to the submissive/slaves on here. What do you feel are the most important dynamics for being good at what you do? Now I know and respect that each and every one of us are different and one mans meat is another mans poison, so to speak! So, I am not asking how you like to submit or personal experiences, but asking what attributes, within your submission would you think make a long term and successful relationship?

leili -> RE: The good submissive (4/20/2007 8:15:55 AM)
i think that first of all it is very important to pay attention to the needs of your Dominant. for example, if your Dominant likes....coffee, always have fresh coffee at hand and always check the said cup without your Dominant having to ask you. and prepare it the way he/she likes it.....another thing on being submissive is you have got to LIKE to serve. if you do not like serving, then why the hell are you a submissive in the first place? lol, you know? the top attributes should be complete obedience, exquisite beauty (which i'm working on right now lol), and definitely just having the desire to serve and please the Dominant. seeing them happy should make the submissive happy. anyway, i could go on and on and on on this subject but that's enough for now lol [;)]

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: The good submissive (4/20/2007 8:17:30 AM)
Self awareness Refusal to settle or not be true to myself Adaptability

MariaB -> RE: The good submissive (4/20/2007 8:24:35 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: leili i think that first of all it is very important to pay attention to the needs of your Dominant. for example, if your Dominant likes....coffee, always have fresh coffee at hand and always check the said cup without your Dominant having to ask you. and prepare it the way he/she likes it.....another thing on being submissive is you have got to LIKE to serve. if you do not like serving, then why the hell are you a submissive in the first place? lol, you know? the top attributes should be complete obedience, exquisite beauty (which i'm working on right now lol), and definitely just having the desire to serve and please the Dominant. seeing them happy should make the submissive happy. anyway, i could go on and on and on on this subject but that's enough for now lol [;)] Hello leili and thank you for the reply You say exquisite beauty. I am a little baffled by that!. Do you mean beauty from within or outwardly beautiful

MariaB -> RE: The good submissive (4/20/2007 8:27:51 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross Self awareness Refusal to settle or not be true to myself Adaptability Ha, i like this response! I have read a lot of your posts and I relate to a lot of what you say. Thank you

Leigha23 -> RE: The good submissive (4/20/2007 8:45:11 AM)
i would like a man to be dominant in the mind which is being a likeable man, creative, chill personality and likes people. not a man with a tough guy attitude who is a hater of women and not a man with more enemies than friends and a man who has his life in order and does not play games with peoples minds.

MariaB -> RE: The good submissive (4/20/2007 9:14:09 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Leigha23 i would like a man to be dominant in the mind which is being a likeable man, creative, chill personality and likes people. not a man with a tough guy attitude who is a hater of women and not a man with more enemies than friends and a man who has his life in order and does not play games with peoples minds. I think the same goes for a dominant wanting the same attributes in a sub.

MrDiscipline44 -> RE: The good submissive (4/20/2007 9:15:17 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Leigha23 not a man with a tough guy attitude who is a hater of women Are you saying a guy with a tough guy attitude is a hater of women? Are you lumping these two seperate and wholely different things into one, or are they actually two seperate things to you and you just didn't put in the correct punctuation marks?

juliaoceania -> RE: The good submissive (4/20/2007 11:00:08 AM)
My willingness to learn from my mistakes, be introspective when asked to be, the willingness to listen even when I do not like what I am hearing (that is a hard one...smiles) come instantly to mind. I take pride in myself and what I do no matter what I am doing in all aspects of my life, I also think this tends to be a good attribute for a submissive. I have high self esteem, which seems to be something that my Daddy prizes in me.

xxblushesxx -> RE: The good submissive (4/20/2007 11:04:10 AM)
honesty thoughtfulness working for what is best for both of you learning how to communicate with your Master in a way that works for both of you growth respect brattiness...lol

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: The good submissive (4/20/2007 11:58:56 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: juliaoceania I take pride in myself and what I do no matter what I am doing in all aspects of my life, I also think this tends to be a good attribute for a submissive. I have high self esteem, which seems to be something that my Daddy prizes in me. We all know it's just a really good cover for you Julia ;)

jauntyone -> RE: The good submissive (4/20/2007 12:14:31 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MariaB I am a lifestyle dominant and I am very specific in what I look for in a submissive. I wanted to put it to the submissive/slaves on here. What do you feel are the most important dynamics for being good at what you do? Now I know and respect that each and every one of us are different and one mans meat is another mans poison, so to speak! So, I am not asking how you like to submit or personal experiences, but asking what attributes, within your submission would you think make a long term and successful relationship? Greetings what are the most important dynamics for being good at what I do? Well, since I don't see slavery as a job so to speak, I think that the things that make any relationship successful should apply here. Ability to adapt and compromise; respect for each other and the relationship; honesty with yourself and each other; communication. I wish you well melissa

MariaB -> RE: The good submissive (4/20/2007 1:37:48 PM)
Thanks for all the intelligent responses. I just hope that some of those subs out there that think that submission is just about servitude will read this and take on board what submission ‘should’ be about. There are so many subs on this site but I honestly believe that very few could of answered this question. So many good words Ability, compromise, adapt, respect, honesty, communication, self esteem, pride, thoughtfulness, self awareness and my favourite ‘growth’! All I can add to that is ‘integrity’ and being able to have the ability to sacrifice your own ethics.

juliaoceania -> RE: The good submissive (4/20/2007 2:22:49 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross quote: ORIGINAL: juliaoceania I take pride in myself and what I do no matter what I am doing in all aspects of my life, I also think this tends to be a good attribute for a submissive. I have high self esteem, which seems to be something that my Daddy prizes in me. We all know it's just a really good cover for you Julia ;) Like being undercover?...smiles

sambamanslilgirl -> RE: The good submissive (4/20/2007 2:23:17 PM)
having similar interests as a vanilla and BDSM is very important to me because if we don't have anything in common building a relationship would be a difficult thing to do. the rest - trust, honesty, integrity, intelligence, successful, mentally and financially stable, etc. fall into place.

MariaB -> RE: The good submissive (4/20/2007 2:46:48 PM)
I agree sambamanslilgirl. If any of this is going to be long term then its very important to focus on one another’s vanilla interests. That feeling of submission/dominance is still their but it is just less visible.

AquaticSub -> RE: The good submissive (4/20/2007 3:34:05 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MariaB I am a lifestyle dominant and I am very specific in what I look for in a submissive. I wanted to put it to the submissive/slaves on here. What do you feel are the most important dynamics for being good at what you do? Now I know and respect that each and every one of us are different and one mans meat is another mans poison, so to speak! So, I am not asking how you like to submit or personal experiences, but asking what attributes, within your submission would you think make a long term and successful relationship? While hard to define, I think that the most important attributes may be both the desire to obey (obviously) and also the confidence in your dynamic to "step outside" of your submission and be able to tell your dominant/master when something is wrong.

leili -> RE: The good submissive (4/20/2007 4:41:47 PM)
i mean exquisite beauty both inward and outward, but more importantly inward, of course

sillygirl09 -> RE: The good submissive (4/20/2007 5:22:44 PM)
I think being totally honest with myself as to what I want and doing my best to express that to any partner I have is most important.

slaveish -> RE: The good submissive (4/20/2007 7:49:20 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MariaB So many good words Ability, compromise, adapt, respect, honesty, communication, self esteem, pride, thoughtfulness, self awareness and my favourite ‘growth’! All I can add to that is ‘integrity’ and being able to have the ability to sacrifice your own ethics. I'm not sure about sacrificing my own ethics, even though I am a slave. I am flexible and have changed a great deal since Master took an interest in training me for his Household. Ethics, I think, are those things we hang on to even when it is difficult to do so; otherwise, they'd be called "quirks". To add a couple more words to that list, I think creativity (who wants a boring slave ... or a boring Master for that matter) and ingenuity have a place on there.

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