pathetic or courageous ??

pathetic or courageous ?? (Full Version)

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myobedience -> pathetic or courageous ?? (4/20/2007 8:04:01 PM)
How many times have you read profiles where the subbie threatens any one who talks to them without first asking request from the DOM or the dom saying no ONE can talk to MY subbie without permission? How pathetic do you think this is? How courageous do you think this is?

minnetar -> RE: pathetic or courageous ?? (4/20/2007 8:06:55 PM)
i wonder if they can be a registered member and not have a profile. Just makes me curious as to why they are registered with a profile. minnetar

TemptingNviceSub -> RE: pathetic or courageous ?? (4/20/2007 8:14:56 PM)
Neither...it just is..Who am I to judge others dynamics..You never know,when it might be your dynamic that is being judged...[:)]..Tempting

myobedience -> RE: pathetic or courageous ?? (4/20/2007 8:21:04 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: TemptingNviceSub Neither...it just is..Who am I to judge others dynamics..You never know,when it might be your dynamic that is being judged...[:)]..Tempting Who the hell is judging? jeeeeesh just asking a question is now judging??

juliaoceania -> RE: pathetic or courageous ?? (4/20/2007 8:25:00 PM)
I think this is neither pathetic or courageous. There are all sorts of reasons for this, none of them are my business or my concern. I am concerned with my rules that I live by, not anyone else's dynamic and judging their rules as courageous or pathetic. I have something similar to that in my profile, I really do not care if people think I am pathetic or I am courageous, all that matters is that I am his...

ownedgirlie -> RE: pathetic or courageous ?? (4/20/2007 8:26:54 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: myobedience quote: ORIGINAL: TemptingNviceSub Neither...it just is..Who am I to judge others dynamics..You never know,when it might be your dynamic that is being judged...[:)]..Tempting Who the hell is judging? jeeeeesh just asking a question is now judging?? "How pathetic do you think this is?" is a judgmental type of question, as it already carries an assumption of negativity. As opposed to an open ended, "What do you think of this practice?" Regardless, I find such a practice neither pathetic nor courageous. It is a rule implemented by a dominant for reasons that are pertinent to their relationship.

TemptingNviceSub -> RE: pathetic or courageous ?? (4/20/2007 8:41:47 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: myobedience quote: ORIGINAL: TemptingNviceSub Neither...it just is..Who am I to judge others dynamics..You never know,when it might be your dynamic that is being judged...[:)]..Tempting Who the hell is judging? jeeeeesh just asking a question is now judging?? As owned girlie said it had judgemental connotations..however..I was not accusing you of said judgement..when I wrote this "You" was as in "myself"...also worried that it may be misread, as such can easily happen in written communication, I put the smiley to show that I was not attacking you or anyone..I apologise for any misconception...Tempting

hisannabelle -> RE: pathetic or courageous ?? (4/20/2007 8:59:09 PM)
greetings myobedience, i don't find it particularly pathetic or courageous, to be honest. makes me wonder how much the dom believes in the sub's ability (or the sub believes in their own ability) to handle their own affairs, and i think that if neither of them believes the sub is capable of that, that speaks of a bigger problem, to me. but overall i guess it's just personal preference. i can't see myself messaging someone for permission to talk to someone else, so unless it's a poster who i really, really, really want to get to know really badly, i'm likely just to click on to the next profile. annabelle.

FelinePersuasion -> RE: pathetic or courageous ?? (4/20/2007 9:07:50 PM)
I think it's extreamly pathetic chest thumping roar I am giant ape mentality behavior. quote: ORIGINAL: myobedience How many times have you read profiles where the subbie threatens any one who talks to them without first asking request from the DOM or the dom saying no ONE can talk to MY subbie without permission? How pathetic do you think this is? How courageous do you think this is?

juliaoceania -> RE: pathetic or courageous ?? (4/20/2007 9:23:05 PM)
quote: i can't see myself messaging someone for permission to talk to someone else, so unless it's a poster who i really, really, really want to get to know really badly, i'm likely just to click on to the next profile. Bingo, we have a winner for why my profile starts out telling people to email him instead of me. For some reason I was having quite a few people ask me specifics about our relationship.... and I did not like it because he would direct me to answer those emails and tell them to ask him directly. I figured they could just skip asking me anything and go directly to him...smiles.

ownedgirlie -> RE: pathetic or courageous ?? (4/20/2007 9:26:32 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: FelinePersuasion I think it's extreamly pathetic chest thumping roar I am giant ape mentality behavior. quote: ORIGINAL: myobedience How many times have you read profiles where the subbie threatens any one who talks to them without first asking request from the DOM or the dom saying no ONE can talk to MY subbie without permission? How pathetic do you think this is? How courageous do you think this is? How do you know there aren't personal reasons why she needs this?

FelinePersuasion -> RE: pathetic or courageous ?? (4/21/2007 12:05:35 AM)
owned I don't. Maybe of course they want it that way too. It's just my personal opnion.

ownedgirlie -> RE: pathetic or courageous ?? (4/21/2007 12:55:01 AM)
I understand it's your opinion. You are opining that someone who may be doing someone else precisely what they need is extremely pathetic, chest thumping and ape-like behavior. I see that often here, where opinions by outsiders are expressed having no idea what goes on in the relationship they are so adamantly judging. It's a pet peeve of mine. I happened to use your post to express it. [;)] There was a time my ape-like Master put that rule on me. There were very personal reasons for it, and my gratitude was such that no one but him understood.

NakedGirlScout -> RE: pathetic or courageous ?? (4/21/2007 1:30:57 AM)
I find it can be pathetic if it's done for paranoid reasons, or to create drama, where the couple basically goes online in order to play "Now I've Got You, You SOB" to anyone who makes the mistake of greeting the sub in question. Other times it's done simply for control, like choosing the sub's clothing for example, there is no reason except they enjoy this aspect of power exchange (oops I'm making myself wet thinking about it). Last reason I can think of is that maybe the sub is having a lot of difficulties in her life, and getting approached by other doms is not what she needs right then, and this is her Master's way of giving her a measure of protection. Some people can't handle having to tell persistent Doms that they don't want to talk to them, and having a restriction like this makes it much easier, they can say "I'm not allowed to" instead of trying to socialize their way out of a bad situation. Sometimes it's the sub who has begged her Master to place this restriction on her because someone has been harrassing her. I gather from your post that you meant the first category?

MsCfromMelbourne -> RE: pathetic or courageous ?? (4/21/2007 1:53:07 AM)
I find the practice annoying and rather rude However I understand that some subs get their jollies feeling "protected" from the Big Bad World by a Big Strong Dom. And some Big Strong Doms like displays of territorial control. They also love the power play of being asked for - and graciously doling out- consent to other dominants. I wonder what kind of dominants would bother asking? Its best to ignore people like them (which is the end result of appointing a gate keeper). There's enough friendly people in any scene to avoid the ones trying to play petty power games with you

MsCfromMelbourne -> RE: pathetic or courageous ?? (4/21/2007 1:56:28 AM)
And why would a Dom let his or her sub be online anyway if no-one can talk to him or her? Maybe catching up with friends (or their Dom if its a LDR), but probably pimping for their Dominant. Best to avoid them.

AquaticSub -> RE: pathetic or courageous ?? (4/21/2007 2:48:24 AM)
~Fast Reply~ I find it to be neither. We've considered putting it on mine in hopes that trolls and men looking to "steal me away" would be put off, but then I wouldn't get to snark them personally. [:D]

OnlyHis -> RE: pathetic or courageous ?? (4/21/2007 3:43:12 AM)
Everyones relationship dynamics are different. In my relationship with Master He decided that if another Dom or Master wanted to speak to me online they had to ask his permission first. At play parties and such too , a Dominant does not approach someone elses property unless they talk to the Master/Owner first. At least that is what i have seen. When it comes to other subs or slaves i am free to make friends , share experiences ( to a certain degree), and give them help if i possibly can. Same thing for profiles. When mine was active i got to many hits from Dominants that thought because i was a slave i was their slave. Some were quite graphic in what they thought i should do for them. Master had me deactivate the profile. This is not pathetic or courageous. These are rules Master has for me and it works for us in the relationship we have. That is what counts .

eyesopened -> RE: pathetic or courageous ?? (4/21/2007 3:48:53 AM)
my former Master would have preferred that i deactivate my profile when we were together. However, i explained to Him that i enjoyed reading and commenting on these message boards. Why keep a profile active just to post on the boards? Because it becomes open season on flaming, discounting and discrediting a person's posts and the person themselves if they post but have a "profile unavailable". Ya just can't make everyone happy.

subsfaith -> RE: pathetic or courageous ?? (4/21/2007 4:34:46 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: myobedience How many times have you read profiles where the subbie threatens any one who talks to them without first asking request from the DOM or the dom saying no ONE can talk to MY subbie without permission? How pathetic do you think this is? How courageous do you think this is? I do not speak privately to other dominants online, however, contrary to the question, this is my choice and not my Sir's. My choice is to demonstrate further respect for my Sir and his postion in my life, and Sir gratiously accepted this respect. I purposely only chat in rooms where the rules state permission should be gained before PMing. When I am approached to chat I make it clear that I do not chat in the first sentence, and sometimes I get a barrage of abuse back because it doesn't say that on my profile. But why should it? I do not feel the need to discuss my personal relationship with anyone who just happens to click on my profile LOL I can understand why some Sir inist on gainin g permission from themselves, sometimes it is thier own insecurity, sometimes a method of training, and sometimes, as I have been guilty of in the past, because the submissive cannot fully recognise when someone is disrespecting thier union by subtly hitting on them. It could be for one of many reasons and I think each should be judged on its own merits. As for judging others, why does everyone have such a bee in thier bonnet about this? Those who have a go at a poster for judging someone are guilty of judging the poster. We all make judgements, from an early age we learn how to behave with others by thier reaction to our actions. Real Life / Big Brother are a worldwide successes because it is an innate human behaviour to judge others. We pick our friends by judging them. The minute you post personal information about yourself you are inviting others to look at your profile and make a judgement on it, do they want to read your posts, do they want to be your friend, dom etc, the list is endless. Deal with it. :: smiles ::

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