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Use of Mental Reassurance - 4/21/2007 5:26:51 PM

AmazonLady

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My Sir and I do not live together so sometimes it can be difficult for U/us to have a constant 'touch' or comfort with each other. W/we work this out by using a great deal of communication, including : email, messenger, phone and video cam. Through this He also uses a great deal of mental visulization and reassurance. This for me is almost as important as the very act of 'aftercare' or physical touch itself. With this amazing gift my Sir can bring me to orgasm without either of us touching each other, because W/we have worked hard to create a mental connection with each other. O/our relationship is not based just on touch and sensation, but also on tasks that I do for Him, while He is not there. Because I think about Him all through it.. well its a very good feeling for me and keeps my mind busy.

I am curious how often this is used in a D/s relationship and how it can be used in the dynamic in diffrent ways.

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RE: Use of Mental Reassurance - 4/21/2007 7:21:49 PM

hisannabelle

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From: Tallahassee, FL, USA
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greetings,

i would think of this as automatic for many of us...certainly His and my mental connection is very much central to our relationship, even more so than physical. i'm not very good at talking about it, though...but i look forward to reading the other replies.

annabelle.

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RE: Use of Mental Reassurance - 4/21/2007 9:37:20 PM

AmazonLady

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See how fresh and new I am!
lol

I understand that this is not a unique way of using reassurance. I know that I am very emotional and this helps me to cope with the 'away' time.

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RE: Use of Mental Reassurance - 4/23/2007 2:39:28 AM

agirl

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Hello AmazonLady,

In my own relationship, although I have regular physical touch, the fact that we are apart more than we are together has meant that other ways of connecting and being intimate have developed. I see it a little like the heightened sense of smell, or hearing, that a blind person develops.

It's like a different way of being, in between. If we saw each other more often, I know that this aspect would change and I think I would miss it.

In a way, it has become like having a relationship with two different people and when he is physically present, I'm different, too.

agirl

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RE: Use of Mental Reassurance - 4/23/2007 2:44:15 AM

m0rgan

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an interesting thread. i am wondering much of this myself. i have no valuable insights yet, but maybe soon i will.

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RE: Use of Mental Reassurance - 4/23/2007 5:20:57 AM

BDOMsecret

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I also am in a LDR. W/we use the phone and vid/conf, email and IM. I believe W/we have learned more about each other since all we have are the "words". There has to be lots of communication, and He knows me better now than anyone has before. I am reassured often, and when W/we are together, it makes lying in His arms all the sweeter *s*.

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RE: Use of Mental Reassurance - 4/23/2007 7:29:36 AM

LuckyAlbatross

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I actually don't know of a single long term fulfilling relationship which has emotional closeness as a part of it which doesn't employ those sorts of connections.

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