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Introvert or Extrovert - 4/23/2007 6:53:54 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline 		I was pondering something today about submissiveness and personality. I was wondering if submissives tend to be introverted or extroverted.

I am very much an extrovert. I am comfortable talking in front of groups of people. In fact I get paid to talk to people all day (my job requires a lot of conversing and being friendly). I like crowds of people sometimes. In fact I love people. I feel comfortable talking to almost anyone, and I am warm to people. I wonder if submissives tend to be shy and retiring, or outgoing and gregarious, or most of us fall somewhere in between.

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Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt
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RE: Introvert or Extrovert - 4/23/2007 7:01:34 PM   
kyraofMists


Posts: 3292
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline 		I am very much an introvert, but I do not think that it has much to do with my being submissive. 

I have met an extrovert who was a wonderful slave.  She is very outgoing and friendly but as soon as he wanted her attention she was right there at his side.  It was a wonderful dynamic to witness and I hope I get to see more of them in the years to come.

Knight's kyra

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"Passion... it lies in all of us. Sleeping, waiting, and though unbidden, it will stir, open its jaws, and howl. It speaks to us, guides us... passion rules us all. And we obey..." ~Angelus

(in reply to juliaoceania)
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RE: Introvert or Extrovert - 4/23/2007 7:06:09 PM   
hisannabelle


Posts: 1992
Joined: 12/3/2006
From: Tallahassee, FL, USA
Status: offline 		greetings julia,

i am generally introverted. i shy away from parties and other involved social situations, i have very few close friends, etc. however, i do love to chat and often when i am out or at work i will strike up conversations with strangers and customers. i have a little bit of extrovert in me, but i am mostly introverted.

i think it's possible to serve well regardless of whether one is an introvert or extrovert - both present their own challenges and they can both be useful at times as well. for our relationship, my introvertedness is definitely valued because He is a very private person and not at all a social butterfly either - it's one of the ways in which we are very compatible.

i think this is a really interesting thread topic :) i look forward to reading the responses.

annabelle.


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RE: Introvert or Extrovert - 4/23/2007 7:07:52 PM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline 		I don't think it has anything, really, to do with role. I'm often introverted...but, I can be an extrovert, too.

The Jungian definitions of these are:
An introvert is fed from internal activities...books, quiet time, inner spirituality (prayer).
An extrovert is fed from external activites...parties, group activities, outward spirituality (church).

Master Fire


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RE: Introvert or Extrovert - 4/23/2007 7:15:58 PM   
Asraii


Posts: 91
Status: offline 		While I would not go so far as to call myself introverted; I will say that I perfer solitude to crowds; and I perfer staying in the background to being 'center stage'.
 
I am just the kind who does better listening than talking.

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RE: Introvert or Extrovert - 4/23/2007 7:19:27 PM   
LuckyAlbatross


Posts: 19224
Joined: 10/25/2005
Status: offline 		I'm highly introverted, but I've trained myself to appear extroverted when the occasion deems it proper.

I haven't noticed any correlation in reality to orientation/social leanings.  I have noticed tons of stereotypes though :)

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RE: Introvert or Extrovert - 4/23/2007 7:20:21 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline 		Extroverts

  • are interested in what is happening around them
  • are open and often talkative
  • compare their own opinions with the opinions of others
  • like action and initiative
  • easily make new friends or adapt to a new group
  • say what they think
  • are interested in new people
  • easily break unwanted relations

Introverts

  • are interested in their own thoughts and feelings
  • need to have own territory
  • often appear reserved, quiet and thoughtful
  • usually do not have many friends
  • have difficulties in making new contacts
  • like concentration and quiet
  • do not like unexpected visits and therefore do not make them
  • work well alone


So people can see what type more fits them

http://www.socionics.com/main/types.htm

Most people range between the two, on personality tests I am slightly more extroverted than introverted... but very few people are all extrovert or introvert... we tend to have qualities of each... most people are balanced to some degree.

< Message edited by juliaoceania -- 4/23/2007 7:22:17 PM >

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

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RE: Introvert or Extrovert - 4/23/2007 7:28:42 PM   
Asraii


Posts: 91
Status: offline 		Well to be honest, I think this list is a bit off.
 
While I am interested in my own feelings and thoughts; I am more interested in how others feel and the way that they think. Which is why I am such a good listener  Yet, if I have an opinion on something, I tend to state it. If I feel that I need to speak up; I do. I can be quite assertive when the situation calls for it; I just perfer not to be. ( I guess I look for ways to avoid confrontation; attempt instead to reason things out )
 
I do need my own space; I'll give that one up. A few hours in the company of friends and I just want to be left alone for the next couple months.
 
I do appear to others as being a bit reserved, or as someone told me once; a bit snobbish
 
I actually have quite a few friends though; and make friends fairly easy. Probably because I can sit and listen to them and I have a wonderful memory. It's rare for me to forget anything once I have heard it, read it, or seen it.
 
I do like the quiet over loud voices. And I do perfer my own company to that of others.
 
Some from the list hit the mark, but it can go either way when you think about it.
 
 

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RE: Introvert or Extrovert - 4/23/2007 7:35:28 PM   
imthatacheyouhav


Posts: 1259
Joined: 4/16/2007
Status: offline 		i am definately extroverted but i'm not sure i fit all the things listed above for extrovert....my grandma used to say about me, that a stranger was just a friend i hadnt met yet ...and that remains the case today i believe. i was also in retail management for about 15 years so dealing with the public is something i'm used to....i'm just a very submissive extrovert....LOL

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RE: Introvert or Extrovert - 4/23/2007 7:38:26 PM   
Aileen68


Posts: 6091
Joined: 8/2/2005
Status: offline 		I'm introverted on even days.
Extroverted on odd.

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RE: Introvert or Extrovert - 4/23/2007 7:59:25 PM   
Smythe


Posts: 369
Joined: 12/31/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

I was pondering something today about submissiveness and personality. I was wondering if submissives tend to be introverted or extroverted.

I am very much an extrovert. I am comfortable talking in front of groups of people. In fact I get paid to talk to people all day (my job requires a lot of conversing and being friendly). I like crowds of people sometimes. In fact I love people. I feel comfortable talking to almost anyone, and I am warm to people. I wonder if submissives tend to be shy and retiring, or outgoing and gregarious, or most of us fall somewhere in between.




There was a thread not too long ago about Meyers-Briggs personality types and Dominance or submission. I can't recall that anything really lined up except for the fact that there were a hell of a lot of introverts on this board. Way more than in the general population. So you might not get a good sample from the folks here.
Smythe



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RE: Introvert or Extrovert - 4/23/2007 7:59:57 PM   
petdave


Posts: 2479
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania
Most people range between the two, on personality tests I am slightly more extroverted than introverted... but very few people are all extrovert or introvert... we tend to have qualities of each... most people are balanced to some degree.


Viewing your list of traits, it does seem that being a submissive will come more easily if you are an extrovert rather than an introvert... i am a huge introvert, and the "need" to have time completely to myself can sometimes be at odds with serving my wife... i suspect extroverts generally either have or develop a better sense of empathy, which is important in being a proactive sub. i guess the summary version is that introverts are literally more self-centered, which is usually an obstacle to being a good/twue/real/natural submissive?

...dave

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RE: Introvert or Extrovert - 4/23/2007 8:03:31 PM   
junecleaver


Posts: 1145
Joined: 4/6/2005
Status: offline 		 I am very much introverted.  I think it's made me kind of soft and that softness sometimes come off as submissiveness.  But I doubt it has any real correlation.  Most of the s-types I've met in person seem kind of extroverted and forceful to me, but I obviously haven't met everybody so I don't know.

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RE: Introvert or Extrovert - 4/23/2007 8:05:08 PM   
minnetar


Posts: 1272
Joined: 4/11/2007
Status: offline 		i believe it all depends on the comfort level of the situation.  i can be either.

minnetar

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RE: Introvert or Extrovert - 4/23/2007 8:08:15 PM   
juliaoceania


Posts: 21383
Joined: 4/19/2006
From: Somewhere Over the Rainbow
Status: offline 		 
quote:

suspect extroverts generally either have or develop a better sense of empathy, which is important in being a proactive sub. i guess the summary version is that introverts are literally more self-centered, which is usually an obstacle to being a good/twue/real/natural submissive?



I thought introverts would be better, you know the whole shy speak when spoken to thing would come more naturally for an introvert perhaps (if that is what a dom desired, and mine doesn't).

Daddy and I are both extroverted, extremely outward toward others, but he will be the first to tell you he does not connect with others like I do pretty naturally. I remember when we met his landlady for the first time (OMG this little old lady is so adorable), I just connected to her right away... I do that often. I do not talk about me, I talk about them, people like to talk about themselves. Daddy is very out going, but he does not reveal himself as much as I do.

He speaks in front of classes all the time, and in front of their families. He has been in videos... he just is not shy, and he has a lot of charisma.

My Daddy and I have the same Myers Briggs personality profile, ENTJs

< Message edited by juliaoceania -- 4/23/2007 8:09:18 PM >

_____________________________

Once you label me, you negate me ~ Soren Kierkegaard

Reality has a well known Liberal Bias ~ Stephen Colbert

Great minds discuss ideas; Average minds discuss events; Small minds discuss people. Eleanor Roosevelt

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RE: Introvert or Extrovert - 4/23/2007 8:27:25 PM   
Elegant


Posts: 1024
Joined: 3/15/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MasterFireMaam

The Jungian definitions of these are:
An introvert is fed from internal activities...books, quiet time, inner spirituality (prayer).
An extrovert is fed from external activites...parties, group activities, outward spirituality (church).



Hmm..wonder if that makes me an introverted extrovert or an extroverted introvert? *grin*


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RE: Introvert or Extrovert - 4/23/2007 8:32:10 PM   
slaveish


Posts: 1086
Joined: 2/19/2007
Status: offline 		Many years ago, I had to to take a psychological exam as part of a job application process. The test was about two hours long, and full of (the researcher kept assuring me) traps to make sure the test-taker was being honest.

A week later, the researcher called me back to his office. It seemed we had a problem. He said in all the years he'd been administering the exam he'd never seen anything like it. Apparently I'm an extroverted introvert. No shit.

Now if somebody could please tell me what that means ... ~still pondering after all these years~

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You only lose what you cling to. ~~Gautama Sidharta

If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other. ~~Mother Teresa

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RE: Introvert or Extrovert - 4/23/2007 8:32:45 PM   
astarri


Posts: 265
Joined: 4/22/2007
Status: offline 		i am an estraverted introvert: a walking contradiction to be honest. When out in the community i am very much the people person, entertaining and generally amusing . At home i am an introvert. I need peace and tranquility. I need a place to wind down from all that extraversion. 

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RE: Introvert or Extrovert - 4/23/2007 8:40:06 PM   
minnetar


Posts: 1272
Joined: 4/11/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: slaveish

Many years ago, I had to to take a psychological exam as part of a job application process. The test was about two hours long, and full of (the researcher kept assuring me) traps to make sure the test-taker was being honest.

A week later, the researcher called me back to his office. It seemed we had a problem. He said in all the years he'd been administering the exam he'd never seen anything like it. Apparently I'm an extroverted introvert. No shit.

Now if somebody could please tell me what that means ... ~still pondering after all these years~


no need to understand at all - you are sweet and that is all that matters lol!!

minnetar

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RE: Introvert or Extrovert - 4/23/2007 9:40:26 PM   
santalia


Posts: 142
Joined: 1/10/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: juliaoceania

shy


*smiles*

That's me...very much.

i like to call myself a wallflower.

i'm quiet and shy to a fault at times.

-santalia{JR}t

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