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More Food For All The Dirty Minds.... - 4/24/2007 3:33:26 PM   
TotalDevotion2U


Posts: 115
Joined: 11/16/2006
Status: offline
For All Those Dirty Minds ...




These may sound bad but the moral at the end is a good one...

I was scared at first.
It was very wide, and very long,
and it angled straight up.
I decided I had to try it once.
I slowly and carefully eased myself onto it.
It felt weird at first.
Then I got used to it.
I went up and down, and up and down on it.
I was really loving it.

Now I ride on escalators all the time.

I took my fingers and slowly,
and gently stretched it apart.
It was so pure and white.
I licked it once, twice ... I found I couldn't stop.
I licked it faster and faster, and harder.
I began to scrape my teeth against it.
There it was, in my mouth!
All sweet and creamy.
I was done.

And I threw away the outsides of my Oreo cookies.

I squeezed it gently at first,
then a little bit harder.
There seemed to be more and more of it
I moved it towards my lips.
It was a strange and new sensation for me.
I put it in my mouth
and moved it around and around with my tongue.
The time soon came when I knew I had to spit it out.
It was quite an experience.

The 1st time I tasted toothpaste.

They were both round and firm.
There was only the slightest difference between the two.
I took one in my hand and twisted it hard.
I used my other hand to grab the other one
and twist it hard the other way.

Now there's a brighter light bulb in the living room.

It was very long, kind of thin.
I slid it between my fingers
until I got to the end of it.
I was turning it on.
It became firm in my hands,
and the end was wet.
Then it got very hard and began gushing out of the tip.

Then I took the garden hose and watered the bushes.

I knew it could be done.
I wanted to try but I didn't know if I could do it.
I called my friend.
He said he knew how to do it and would teach me.
He put his arms around me and started.
I watched nervously in the mirror.
He finally finished and pulled back slowly.
I felt relieved that it was over.

I hate neckties.

It looked warm and dark, and juicy and inviting.
I wasn't sure just what I wanted to do with it.
I carefully pulled it apart with my fingers to look into it better.
I knew how great it would be if I just started eating it.

But I decided to put ketchup on my burger.

MORAL???

It is not the word that corrupts the mind, but the mind that corrupts the word.
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RE: More Food For All The Dirty Minds.... - 4/24/2007 6:51:29 PM   
ta2dqt


Posts: 375
Joined: 3/3/2006
Status: offline
LOVE just about ALL your jokes!! Love jokes! Humour and happiness Truely makes the world go round!!!  ;)

_____________________________

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"People are like fine wine, they get better with age!"

"Everything happens for a reason."



myspace.com/theoneandonlyta2dqt

(in reply to TotalDevotion2U)
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RE: More Food For All The Dirty Minds.... - 4/24/2007 7:21:25 PM   
rukna


Posts: 204
Joined: 12/13/2006
From: Bangalore
Status: offline
toothpaste one was good

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for daily dose of humor visit
http://www.enagar.com/

(in reply to TotalDevotion2U)
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RE: More Food For All The Dirty Minds.... - 4/24/2007 7:40:03 PM   
HouseofBear


Posts: 1280
Joined: 2/9/2005
Status: offline
Those were excellent, grinz.

(in reply to rukna)
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RE: More Food For All The Dirty Minds.... - 4/24/2007 7:55:18 PM   
TotalDevotion2U


Posts: 115
Joined: 11/16/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ta2dqt

LOVE just about ALL your jokes!! Love jokes! Humour and happiness Truely makes the world go round!!!  ;)


Thanks for the positive feedback, it is appreciated.  I agree with you in that laughter can serve as a great therapy for us all.  It can really help alleviate those crappy days that we all have sometimes.

(in reply to ta2dqt)
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