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simple misunderstanding - 4/25/2007 10:10:05 AM

softness

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Simple Misunderstanding
Two old ladies were outside their nursing home, having a smoke, when it started to rain. One of the ladies pulled out a condom, cut off the end and put it over her cigarette, and continued smoking.

Betty What's that?
Shirley A condom. This way my cigarette doesn't get wet.
Betty: Where did you get it? Shirley: You can get them at any drugstore. The next day, Betty hobbles herself into the local drugstore and announces to the pharmacist that she wants a box of condoms.

The guy, obviously embarrassed, looks at her kind of strangely she is, after all, over 80 years of age, but very delicately asks what brand she prefers.

Betty: Doesn't matter son, as long as it fits a Camel.

The pharmacist fainted.

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RE: simple misunderstanding - 4/25/2007 10:11:43 AM

softness

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A Parrot Joke
This lady approaches a priest and tells him, "Father, I these two talking female parrots, but they only know how to say one thing: 'Hi, we're prostitutes. Do you want to have some fun?' "

"That's terrible!" the priest exclaimed, "but I have a solution to your problem. You can put them with my two male talking parrots. I taught them to read the bible and pray the rosary."

The lady brings over her parrots and puts them in the priest's cage. "Hi, we're prostitutes. Do you want to have some fun?" they say.

One male parrot looks over at the other and exclaims, "Put the beads away. Our prayers have been answered!"

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proudly wearing the blue collar of consideration to DK Leather, Leatherdykeuk, and LeatherEagle of the UK KRueL Leather Family

veritas, respectus honorque in corio

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RE: simple misunderstanding - 4/25/2007 10:13:29 AM

softness

Posts: 2918
Joined: 8/1/2006
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loves this one

Women Problems
A man comes home from work to find all his belongings strewn across the front yard.

He walks up to the front door and finds it locked. He tries his keys and they don't work. After pounding on the door for what felt like forever his girlfriend finally opens the door.

In shock he asks her what is going on. She replies "I found out today that you are a pedophile and we are over".

Angered he looks her square in the eyes and responds, "that is a mighty big word for a twelve year old."

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proudly wearing the blue collar of consideration to DK Leather, Leatherdykeuk, and LeatherEagle of the UK KRueL Leather Family

veritas, respectus honorque in corio

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RE: simple misunderstanding - 4/25/2007 10:31:53 AM

softness

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Little Girl Asks Mom
Little Girl: "Mommy, what's a PENIS?"

Mom: "Be a good girl and when you grow up, you'll get one."

Little Girl pondered this awhile "But what if i'm bad?"

Mom: smiling a wicked little smile to herself "Then my darling ... you'll get MORE!!!"

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proudly wearing the blue collar of consideration to DK Leather, Leatherdykeuk, and LeatherEagle of the UK KRueL Leather Family

veritas, respectus honorque in corio

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RE: simple misunderstanding - 4/25/2007 11:21:22 AM

Casie

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Those are some great jokes lol

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