RE: The sadistic dom vs the sensual dom

RE: The sadistic dom vs the sensual dom (Full Version)

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earthycouple -> RE: The sadistic dom vs the sensual dom (4/30/2007 7:55:42 AM)
Can't I be sadistic and sensual? D~

Aswad -> RE: The sadistic dom vs the sensual dom (4/30/2007 6:43:35 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MellowSir Just wondering which type of dominant submissives prefer. If you tell me which type of (wo)man a vanilla prefers, I'll tell you a BDSM stereotype. [:D] quote: In the vanilla world it appears there are many more women with cruel men than there are with caring ones. Whoa. I think we're hanging in quite different circles, if you're talking about vanillas. Yes, there are many who end up with domestic abuse, but not a majority, I think. Just curious; have you considered that perhaps you attract the ones with cruel men? I find some of them tend to find me relaxing/calming/reassuring to be around, despite the fact that (unbeknownst to those of them who aren't into the scene) I'm probably as cruel as whoever they're with, if not more so, given consent to act that way. quote: We all know the cliche' that women like bad boys, does that equate with mean? IMO, it relates to the primate alpha/beta dynamic, which wrt men "classically" (quoted because I don't think it has to be that way; ref. wolves vs sheepdogs) tends to mean "bad boys", and "mean boys" even more so. Guess that's why the serial killers get all those love letters. Attraction doesn't always behave reasonably. Edit: I should probably clarify that "cruel" in reference to me generally means sadistic. I don't treat bottoms/subs/slaves with indifference, emotional abuse or lack of respect, unless that's something they've specifically requested.

grlneedstolearn -> RE: The sadistic dom vs the sensual dom (4/30/2007 6:51:16 PM)
Good evening, i like bad boys but with a soft heart, if that ever makes sense, in a vanilla relationship. With this lifestyle i prefer more sensual but will endure some pain to please my Dom.

moki1984 -> RE: The sadistic dom vs the sensual dom (4/30/2007 6:52:43 PM)
my dom is a sadist..he enjoys my whimpers and keeps thinking of new ways of hurting me.....but he is also extremely sensual and sweet. i think one should be both

DiurnalVampire -> RE: The sadistic dom vs the sensual dom (4/30/2007 6:59:49 PM)
I am both, depending on the person I am dealing with at the time. My sadistic side is not very often expressed, but it is there. Both have their merits and their place. DV

slaveish -> RE: The sadistic dom vs the sensual dom (4/30/2007 8:27:31 PM)
I like Master's sadistic side as well as his sensual side. One minute he will use the leather strap on me for whatever reason, and the next minute he wants me to cuddle on the bed so that he can feel me being close to him.

Milivoje -> RE: The sadistic dom vs the sensual dom (5/1/2007 4:58:28 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross What most women want tends to be someone who will act mean and act nice depending on what will turn her on at that particular time :) Some years ago I found out that "just being my self" works best. Sometimes I like to be "cruel" sometimes I like to be "sensual", and if I do exactly what I want... it always comes out OK. People should remember one thing, if 2 (or more) people are together and they like it, it is because they are compatible in most, if not all, things. So if you would like something in a particular time, most likely your partner will enjoy the same thing at the same time.

HalloweenWhite -> RE: The sadistic dom vs the sensual dom (5/1/2007 5:01:29 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross quote: ORIGINAL: MellowSir We all know the cliche' that women like bad boys, does that equate with mean? Given all the threads we have with doms complaining that subs tell them they are "too nice" I'd say more than likely. What most women want tends to be someone who will act mean and act nice depending on what will turn her on at that particular time :) Lol. Ouch.

slavemaia -> RE: The sadistic dom vs the sensual dom (5/7/2007 6:23:32 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MellowSir Just wondering which type of dominant submissives prefer. In the vanilla world it appears there are many more women with cruel men than there are with caring ones. Does this carry over to bdsm circles as well? We all know the cliche' that women like bad boys, does that equate with mean? i like a combination. i like Master to know what's appropriate and when. Without tenderness and care, His "cruelty" would scare the bjesus out of me. Without the cruelty, His care and tenderness would bore me to tears.

soulfulkitten -> RE: The sadistic dom vs the sensual dom (5/7/2007 4:58:47 PM)
If I had to make a choice, I would choose a sadistic Dominant. I have met many sensual Doms, and been told they could never cause me pain. That is just not an option for me. Not that I require it always or on any type of consistant basis but I could not rule it out of my life forever. I do not equate sadism with being mean...though I have been on the receiving end of things from a mean Dominant who was also sadistic.

WiseCracknSadist -> RE: The sadistic dom vs the sensual dom (5/7/2007 5:06:00 PM)
You never see fun loving Dom. Is that like an oxymoron? You can't crack jokes and a whip? I enjoy both and according to whether or not my jokes are good both could be viewed as torture.

Indemnis -> RE: The sadistic dom vs the sensual dom (5/11/2007 10:58:26 PM)
I definately prefer a mixture of the two, like my own D... but then, I'm a little bit of a masochist. :)

minnetar -> RE: The sadistic dom vs the sensual dom (5/11/2007 11:02:14 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MellowSir Just wondering which type of dominant submissives prefer. In the vanilla world it appears there are many more women with cruel men than there are with caring ones. Does this carry over to bdsm circles as well? We all know the cliche' that women like bad boys, does that equate with mean? i have never been into bad boys or rude Doms. i want a sensual Dom. minnetar

babygurl4daddy -> RE: The sadistic dom vs the sensual dom (5/14/2007 11:50:23 PM)
my daddy is definitely sadistic. He even has laughed at the sight of seeing me be humiliated or uncomfortable. But I know this turns him on, so it turns me on. True, I would like to be his babygirl, rocked and cuddled and given a bottle and tucked into bed. But as 'mellowsir' said, yes, I have realized that I am attracted to the bad boys who are a challenge to gain sympathy from. It's a challenge to see emotion come out of them. But when it does you feel rewarded.. otherwise a nice sweet man would just get old after a while. Women like bad boys.. I have even had daddies who were wayyyyy too nice. I really enjoy a sadistic daddy dom who watches every move I make. It let's me know he cares about me... in wierd way I guess. [:)] As long as he respects you there is no harm done.

greeneyes1962 -> RE: The sadistic dom vs the sensual dom (5/14/2007 11:54:42 PM)
Why does it have to be one or the other, why not a combination of both attributes?

meticulousgirl -> RE: The sadistic dom vs the sensual dom (5/15/2007 1:15:13 PM)
I enjoy both honestly. There are times when my hormones just crave pain and humiliation and there are other times when i want to be with Him but i just dont want anything to hurt, but would rather just lay around or sit around and cuddle...i feel silly but my little girl comes out on occassion still and i'll go up to Him and hug Him because He's like a really tall teddy bear over me (I'm only 4"11). I just like both sides dont know why....God I hope I'm not turning vanilla...lol

homework -> RE: The sadistic dom vs the sensual dom (5/18/2007 2:00:15 PM)
i come from a place where scenes only happen once in awhile. out of those times He is only, what he calls sadisitc, once in a bluemoon. in our everyday life we are still working out what he wants from me, there are somethings that are established and i do get punished, but these come from a place of tenderness to help me. to Him it is hard to really give me the sadistic beatings that i crave, it just isn't part of how He Doms. He is very sensual and more into other things that have nothing to do with the intense physical attention i would like receive more often.i have learned that it is hard to be patient until this part of him is in the mood or until i find someone else to add to out mix who has no problem with being a sadist- but at this point i need the discipline of waiting. It has been good for someone like me, who is so new, to learn how long all of this can really take. i have to say that in all of this i have found that i like the balance between sadism and sensualness. not to say you can't do these things at the same time. just that my Dom doesn't do it very often.

pinksugarsub -> RE: The sadistic dom vs the sensual dom (5/18/2007 5:53:57 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MellowSir Just wondering which type of dominant submissives prefer. In the vanilla world it appears there are many more women with cruel men than there are with caring ones. Does this carry over to bdsm circles as well? We all know the cliche' that women like bad boys, does that equate with mean? i think Yr mistaken in insinuating that sadists are cruel or lacking in sensuality. i have sadist Friends and i know this is not the case for Them and i presume, for Others as well. i think W/women are too diverse to make any meaningful statement about W/who attracts T/them. However, at my house, the "bad boy" was a poser who served his purpose -- annoying parents -- until the unmentionable had left for college.

Kitte9 -> RE: The sadistic dom vs the sensual dom (5/18/2007 6:59:21 PM)
I am finding myself to be a sensual masochist, so I guess I'm looking for a bit of both in a Mistress.

Sinergy -> RE: The sadistic dom vs the sensual dom (5/19/2007 12:41:20 AM)
It seems like many of the submissives on here are posting they like a sadistic Dom or a sensual Dom or one of both. When exactly did it start being about what you want? I missed the memo. Sinergy p.p.s. I tend to personally identify more with the sensual Dom than the sadistic Dom, but strumpet was rather proud of the large bruises I gave her the time before last she was down in LA.

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