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PairOfDimes -> RE: what is the best way to have a casual session come to a end? (4/27/2007 2:10:49 PM)
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It's often good to have some idea of what you want to accomplish in a scene--this goes both for people leading and people following (i.e. dominants and submissives). Having goals doesn't mean that you have to want to do lots of emotional-growth stuff, but rather, that you have some central theme or mission for the scene. If you know what you want out of a scene, then you can likely get what you want out of a scene. Then, when you've accomplished that, whatever it is, you'll know that it's time to bring a scene to an end.
How do you structure a scene so that the end isn't a surprise? Think of structuring a novel or a play. You generally want a buildup, a climax (note: I did not write orgasm, I wrote climax), and a denouement--a cool down, for our purposes, or a tying of loose ends. You can end abruptly, immediately after the climax, perhaps, but you must recognize that that is an artistic choice, just as it is in writing.
It is good to be somewhat mindful of time when you play, even if you don't have a later appointment. Tops usually do the clock-watching, possibly because it's difficult for people to look at their wristwatches with hands tied behind their backs. :)
And yes, what I've written above is much like structuring any number of other things--a game, a dinner, a lecture.
Monica
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