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Reading is fundemental.... - 5/1/2005 6:44:40 AM

ProtagonistLily

Posts: 1222
Joined: 12/27/2004
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I was talking to a friend I met on these boards today and we were discussing the idiotic mail we get that clearly shows our profiles haven't been read.

My profile clearly states that in a D/s relationship, I am submissive. In a casual atmosphere, I will Top on a strictly SM basis. To me, this seems fairly clear on who I am, what I'm about, and what I'm willing to do.

So, why is it I get approached as a Domme by men looking for a Mistress? Why is it that bottoms think it's ok to send you mail that says "I know you say in your profile X, but I was wondering...do you think you could do Y?"

Read the profiles. It makes for a much nicer playground around here.

Lily

_____________________________

"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"
~Dr. Seuss~

Post #: 1

RE: Reading is fundemental.... - 5/1/2005 6:46:56 AM

temptation

Posts: 111
Joined: 2/20/2004
From: heaven
Status: offline

the problem is, they cant read your post either.. so it'll keep happening :(

(in reply to ProtagonistLily)

Post #: 2

RE: Reading is fundemental.... - 5/1/2005 6:48:42 AM

Kindred2Evil

Posts: 227
Joined: 4/16/2005
Status: offline

ABSOLUTELY!!! Forgive the caps, but Lord God and Goddess people...is reading not the first thing on here that should attract you?
I'm a Domme or Domina if you prefer, and it is of no end annoying to me to get emails from Dominant males who insist on saying I'm a submissive in hiding...What????
Please, please please people...read the bloody profile all the way through before sending out idiotic mails that not only waste your time in writing them, but my time in reading them.
It's only polite to at least have some clue as to whom you are writing to before doing so, at least IMHO.

Great post Lily

_____________________________

Her touch is on the breeze that brushes your cheek, Her voice rides the thunder as the storm breaks, Her tears will clean your heartache when the rains come, Her sun will light the darkest times when you feel alone...She is the Goddess.

(in reply to ProtagonistLily)

Post #: 3

RE: Reading is fundemental.... - 5/1/2005 7:15:35 AM

GreyStorm

Posts: 423
Joined: 1/26/2005
From: Cheeseheadland
Status: offline

*note to self, scrap that email I was gonna send*

_____________________________

Ahhh temptation, I have named thee and thy name is woman.

(in reply to Kindred2Evil)

Post #: 4

RE: Reading is fundemental.... - 5/1/2005 7:26:09 AM

Kindred2Evil

Posts: 227
Joined: 4/16/2005
Status: offline

LOL okay, needed the laugh today, thank you GreyStorm!

_____________________________

Her touch is on the breeze that brushes your cheek, Her voice rides the thunder as the storm breaks, Her tears will clean your heartache when the rains come, Her sun will light the darkest times when you feel alone...She is the Goddess.

(in reply to GreyStorm)

Post #: 5

RE: Reading is fundemental.... - 5/1/2005 12:17:45 PM

BlkTallFullfig

Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ProtagonistLily
My profile clearly states that in a D/s relationship, I am submissive. In a casual atmosphere, I will Top on a strictly SM basis. To me, this seems fairly clear on who I am, what I'm about, and what I'm willing to do.

So, why is it I get approached as a Domme by men looking for a Mistress? Why is it that bottoms think it's ok to send you mail that says "I know you say in your profile X, but I was wondering...do you think you could do Y?"
Lily

In my opinion, you ought not rule out someone who approaches you as a Domme because they probably are only willing to play bottom to your top in the bedroom anyway (your S/M experience).
In my lil experience, most of the men who approach me as sub are more than happy to tell me exactly how things are going to be, and what they want in life and play; so maybe they will Dominate you, you just need to investigate further and find where their minds are. M

_____________________________

a.k.a. SexyBossyBBW
""Touching was, and still is, and will always be, the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni

(in reply to ProtagonistLily)

Post #: 6

RE: Reading is fundemental.... - 5/1/2005 3:40:58 PM

EmeraldSlave2

Posts: 3645
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline

Expecting othersto act logically and in a manner you desire is just asking to be disappointed.

People will do what they do. Why do so many doms complain about not getting responses back? We will never be satisfied if we base our satisfaction on the behavior of strangers.

As usual- if you don't like it, delete it or block it. It's not going to change.

BTW it's "fundamental."

(in reply to BlkTallFullfig)

Post #: 7

RE: Reading is fundemental.... - 5/1/2005 4:36:42 PM

MrKite

Posts: 94
Joined: 3/11/2005
Status: offline

LOL I can't wait to see cello's reply to this. Her profile clearly states that she is married to her Dominant. I'm blown away by the number of emails she gets every day consisting of asinie one liners. What's worse is that some of them are repeat offenders.
I'm baffled, bewildered and mystified by it.

_____________________________

If it feels good, do it.

(in reply to EmeraldSlave2)

Post #: 8

RE: Reading is fundemental.... - 5/1/2005 10:28:57 PM

cellogrrlMK

Posts: 672
Joined: 3/11/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MrKite

LOL I can't wait to see cello's reply to this. Her profile clearly states that she is married to her Dominant. I'm blown away by the number of emails she gets every day consisting of asinie one liners. What's worse is that some of them are repeat offenders.
I'm baffled, bewildered and mystified by it.

Actually, I was going to compliment EmeraldSlave2 on the spelling correction <G> .

As far as reading goes, obviously some people just don't do it. I wonder what the difference in email volume is between folks who have pics up and folks who don't.

(in reply to MrKite)

Post #: 9

RE: Reading is fundemental.... - 5/1/2005 10:40:31 PM

BlkTallFullfig

Posts: 5585
Joined: 6/25/2004
Status: offline

There is a huge difference...
I get rare emails when photo is not up, so it seems I am almost attention seeking by putting pic up; but for me it's just something to give better visual yah know, that I'm not Bulshitting when describing myself.

M

_____________________________

a.k.a. SexyBossyBBW
""Touching was, and still is, and will always be, the true revolution" Nikki Giovanni

(in reply to cellogrrlMK)

Post #: 10

RE: Reading is fundemental.... - 5/1/2005 11:20:20 PM

cellogrrlMK

Posts: 672
Joined: 3/11/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: BlkTallFullfig

There is a huge difference...

Why am I not surprised?

(in reply to BlkTallFullfig)

Post #: 11

RE: Reading is fundemental.... - 5/2/2005 2:46:53 AM

Quivver

Posts: 1953
Joined: 11/27/2004
Status: offline

Oh Lord i whole heartedly agree with the Pic issue, no pic = less mail that's for sure. But there is one other thing that draws unread attention..... show up as online now on the main screen and before you've been on 3 minutes there is *new* mail.

most often these are the simple one liners cause reading goes hand in hand with writing, or worse yet is when you know it's a form letter cause Einstein sure couldn't type all that in less then 3 minutes........... Grrrrrrrrrrrr ...........

_____________________________

The problem with communication ... is the illusion that it has been accomplished. ~George Bernard Shaw

(in reply to cellogrrlMK)

Post #: 12

RE: Reading is fundemental.... - 5/2/2005 2:56:03 AM

domtimothy46176

Posts: 670
Joined: 12/25/2004
From: Dayton, Ohio area
Status: offline

lol, I will admit to getting just a smidgeon of amusement from this discussion. To me it seems to go hand in hand with the constant complaint from men about never receiving replies to e-mails. In that spirit, please allow me to be the first to suggest there is no obligation to read a profile before mailing off a form letter, lmao.

***************Big Evil Grin********************

It's amazing what will feed the inner sadist on a slow day.

having waaaay too much fun at 5am
Timothy

(in reply to Quivver)

Post #: 13

RE: Reading is fundemental.... - 5/2/2005 5:31:26 AM

stormsfate

Posts: 849
Joined: 2/1/2005
Status: offline

Oh I don't agree with the pic no pic thing. Initially I received a TON of emails. (All asking where I got my shirt...lol.) Anyway...I have pics up and these days the only email I get are from those I know from here on the forum and a *rare* "I think you are just what I'm looking for" from people who obviously haven't read my profile.

I've always wondered on these types of sites where people complain constantly about how much email they get whether they are being truthful...lol. I know the HBBs get a lot (only because before my profile became viewable, I got a lot). I always wanted to do an experiment, but struggle with the idea that it would not be right to mislead people...so I haven't done it.

best regards,
f

_____________________________

Vision? What do you know about MY vision? My vision would turn your world upside down, tear asunder your illusions and the sanctuary of your own ignorance crashing down around you! Now ask yourself, are you really ready to see that vision? [/size

(in reply to domtimothy46176)

Post #: 14

RE: Reading is fundemental.... - 5/2/2005 5:42:07 AM

ProtagonistLily

Posts: 1222
Joined: 12/27/2004
Status: offline

quote:

Oh I don't agree with the pic no pic thing. Initially I received a TON of emails. (All asking where I got my shirt...lol.) Anyway...I have pics up and these days the only email I get are from those I know from here on the forum and a *rare* "I think you are just what I'm looking for" from people who obviously haven't read my profile.

I've always wondered on these types of sites where people complain constantly about how much email they get whether they are being truthful...lol. I know the HBBs get a lot (only because before my profile became viewable, I got a lot). I always wanted to do an experiment, but struggle with the idea that it would not be right to mislead people...so I haven't done it.

best regards,
f

First off, fate, what in the hell's an HBB?? ~grin~

Secondly, for personal reasons, I don't have my photo up for the general public to see, though if I'm comfortable, I'll send one to someone. I think I get maybe 3 solicitous emails a week. Most of which are forms or one liners.

And I agree with Timothy, it is kind of whiney to have started this thread, but I just don't understand why people don't read the profile.

I'm very tempted to sit down with a few bottoms (generic, all encompassing term here) and write a "How to approach a submissive" primer the way LA and Eden did for the male bottoms when approaching a Domme. Yes, I know, in their infinate Domliness they are all supreme and I should be a greatful little slut for the crumbs I'm thrown once in a while, but needless to say, some of these Doms need this.

Lily

_____________________________

"Be who you are and say what you feel because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind"
~Dr. Seuss~

(in reply to stormsfate)

Post #: 15

RE: Reading is fundemental.... - 5/2/2005 5:43:07 AM

cellogrrlMK

Posts: 672
Joined: 3/11/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Quivver

But there is one other thing that draws unread attention..... show up as online now on the main screen and before you've been on 3 minutes there is *new* mail.

Yeah Quivver, you're right actually!

(in reply to Quivver)

Post #: 16

RE: Reading is fundemental.... - 5/2/2005 8:53:25 AM

stormsfate

Posts: 849
Joined: 2/1/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ProtagonistLily

I'm very tempted to sit down with a few bottoms (generic, all encompassing term here) and write a "How to approach a submissive" primer the way LA and Eden did for the male bottoms when approaching a Domme. Yes, I know, in their infinate Domliness they are all supreme and I should be a greatful little slut for the crumbs I'm thrown once in a while, but needless to say, some of these Doms need this.

Lily

The only problem with this is that people like to be approached differently....and not for nothing, but they must be having some success, or one would think they would not keep trying the same approach...lol. I'm pretty sure that some people might be flatter by the "u r hot" email, and a beautiful relationship may evolve :::rolling eyes:::

Seriously though...three a week isn't too bad. That's about what I get, but to me, that's a pretty low number of emails. I guess I just feel overlooked because I don't get all this crappy email everyone talks about...I"m feeling left out. (NOT!).

best regards,
f

_____________________________

Vision? What do you know about MY vision? My vision would turn your world upside down, tear asunder your illusions and the sanctuary of your own ignorance crashing down around you! Now ask yourself, are you really ready to see that vision? [/size

(in reply to ProtagonistLily)

Post #: 17

RE: Reading is fundemental.... - 5/2/2005 9:09:41 PM

GreyStorm

Posts: 423
Joined: 1/26/2005
From: Cheeseheadland
Status: offline

Yeah, what is HBB?

_____________________________

Ahhh temptation, I have named thee and thy name is woman.

(in reply to stormsfate)

Post #: 18

RE: Reading is fundemental.... - 5/2/2005 10:32:04 PM

kc692

Posts: 3701
Joined: 3/24/2005
Status: offline

I will echo everyones elses resounding question;;;HBB, WTF?

(in reply to GreyStorm)

Post #: 19

RE: Reading is fundemental.... - 5/2/2005 11:38:15 PM

GoddessDustyGold

Posts: 2822
Joined: 4/11/2004
From: Arizona
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: ProtagonistLily

First off, fate, what in the hell's an HBB?? ~grin~

<snipped here> I'm very tempted to sit down with a few bottoms (generic, all encompassing term here) and write a "How to approach a submissive" primer the way LA and Eden did for the male bottoms when approaching a Domme. Yes, I know, in their infinate Domliness they are all supreme and I should be a greatful little slut for the crumbs I'm thrown once in a while, but needless to say, some of these Doms need this.

Lily

Yes, I would love to know what an HBB is too!
Now here's My thing. I don't ever approach a submissive boy online. They write to Me.
And when I write back, often it is just too much for them? Too realtime? Uh oh, this one isn't going to chat or cyber or feed My online fantasy games? They fall off the map. And I don't worry about it. Fortunately, (or maybe unfortunately?) there will be more of the same tomorrow, and the next day and the next. Of course, I am speaking from a Lady's perspective here. And someday I will find My good boys, whether it's online or at My local meetings.
I do agree with M that having a pic makes a difference. I changed Mine around and while they were off, I only got 3 emails in 2 days. And one was from a boy who regularly writes and wanted to know why My pics were gone! Makes Me suspect (just suspect, mind you!) that these boys are doing searches with "photos only" in the criteria. *W*
But I would guesstimate, being quite generous here, that only one in ten has a photo posted themselves.
Hmmmmmmmmm...
Will be checking back to learn all about an HBB!

< Message edited by GoddessDustyGold -- 5/2/2005 11:39:56 PM >

_____________________________

Dusty
They that give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety
B Franklin
Don't blame Me ~ I didn't vote for either of them
The Hidden Kingdom

(in reply to ProtagonistLily)

Post #: 20

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