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atku2005 -> Introduction (4/28/2007 10:16:27 PM)
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I am a 27/male sub from India.
The above line doesn't mean anything. It is only the tip of the iceberg. When i look at myself, I see a self destructive creative man who has a burning desire to take pains for others. This is primarily because i cannot see others in pain. I feel that like taking all the pain in universe and make the world a happy place to live for others. That doesn't happen because i am saturated with pain, mentally and bodily.
When i say pain, I mean the urge, the tension in nerves and muscles. It is a real agony. Believe me its not pleasurable. Agony o defeat, agony of jealousy, agony of being dominated, agony of not being dominated, agony of sexual and higher level dissatishfaction.
I curse God for creating so much of pain on earth. I love God for creating this beautiful universe also. God likes to give pleasure and also pain. He is the biggest sadist i have ever seen. Still i love to surrender to Him.
I am highly educated, with a scientific bend of mind. My thoughts are very complex which even i don't understand, so i don't expect others to understand. I dream of a life where i live with a Dominant partner, who dominates and trains me in the lifestyle. I wish to make Her happy with all my energy, creativity, emotions and devotion. It is difficult to practice than to say.
I had some online experiance. Some were traumatic, some were a soothing breeze, some i still cherish and for some i cry every night for losing them . See how deep these D/s relationships touches me.
Now i am with a mentor, whois training me online. Why online? I am tired of searching and i couldn't get anything here locally. I would like to know lots of people in this lifestyle, specially Dommes and Goddeesses , to learn more about the lifestyle.
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