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RE: Tributes - 5/3/2007 1:56:09 PM   
GuidingLite


Posts: 233
Joined: 12/10/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DiannaVesta

No doubt the dynamic is important but first you have to get her attention long enough to see if you’re compatible.
.YUP

ALL dominant women that have been at this for more then a year is going to be skeptical of every male that contacts them. Sure you have the women that seem to be kissing sub males asses or talking the shit they want to hear. We all see these women here every single day. I say cut to the cut chase, stop the nonsense girl and stand up for what you need. Don’t ever settle for less. Make him do back flips to prove he’s worthy of your time. It won’t kill him to buy you a small gift and if he can’t do it ON HIS OWN or find some way to make your life better move him on down the road.

.....I’d rather have a handful of wonderful submissive GENTLEMEN then an army of dick weeds.    



YUP

(in reply to DiannaVesta)
Profile   Post #: 61
RE: Tributes - 5/3/2007 2:03:31 PM   
jaxbeachgirl


Posts: 12
Joined: 4/29/2007
Status: offline 		A good example from this thread:

"I agree completely with the below statement....I can honestly say that if I "ordered" a vanilla man to give me his wallet...it would be out of line...but the excitement of taking my slaves wallet in public and emptying it is exciting and fun (for both of us).

I think most of the so-called Sub/Slaves on this site are fakes for assuming Dom's are here to comply with what they want....isn't that against the entire notion of serving?"

GREAT example. Writer KNOWS his/her behavior is generally innapropriate, but totally ok (and oh so exciting for them both) if the partner is submissive. Gosh, do submissives not have the same bills? What is fun about watching somebody just drain your finances?! 

Yeppers, we submissive types are "fake" because we don't think it's cute to give hookers money.

BDSM is a PARTNERSHIP. Hookers will always abound, but submission is valuable. Shoot, make the dom give you their money--you're the one doing the work!

(in reply to jaxbeachgirl)
Profile   Post #: 62
RE: Tributes - 5/3/2007 2:30:08 PM   
Copulo


Posts: 268
Joined: 5/3/2007
Status: offline 		I have mixed feelings about all of this.
You know it can work both ways.I once had a sub that I tired of. The dynamics were not right and I sat him down and told him so. This man was loaded and within a short time of my rejection he was trying to bombard me with gifts. He even offered to buy me a Porsche Carrera. Now who was trying to buy who!!! Yes, yes I should have been a greedy bitch and just taken the car but at the end of the day I felt pretty insulted that he thought he could buy me at all!
I think so long as we don’t become greedy then a tribute is nice. By becoming greedy we ward off the ‘poor’ potential subs that could fit in with our lives perfectly, except we will never know because they couldn’t afford the tribute!!!

What I do find interesting is, when I worked as a pro Mistress I often got very expensive and unique gifts. I did not have a tribute list and I never asked for anything more than the money they were paying me for a session. The gifts just came and the thing is, this is when I least needed the gifts because I was earning a considerable amount of money!
Now Im poor ( well sort of!) and not pro Mistressing and I find a lot of the subs I meet are too tight fisted to even buy me a meal!

Maria

(in reply to igor2003)
Profile   Post #: 63
RE: Tributes - 5/3/2007 2:30:51 PM   
HotelDomination


Posts: 7
Joined: 4/9/2007
Status: offline 		In the UK hookers are another name for prostitutes, we are not talking about prostitutes we are talking BDSM and Dommes here. If you think that they are one and the same thing then you are wrong.
 
Submission is valuable, very true, but so is true Dominance.

(in reply to jaxbeachgirl)
Profile   Post #: 64
RE: Tributes - 5/3/2007 2:45:18 PM   
MissDiscipline


Posts: 117
Joined: 10/1/2006
From: Domme Beach Calif
Status: offline 		Any sub that has issues with providing tribute to me can kiss my ass- for a fee that is...

(in reply to HotelDomination)
Profile   Post #: 65
RE: Tributes - 5/3/2007 2:47:05 PM   
Copulo


Posts: 268
Joined: 5/3/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: jaxbeachgirl

GREAT example. Writer KNOWS his/her behavior is generally innapropriate, but totally ok (and oh so exciting for them both) if the partner is submissive. Gosh, do submissives not have the same bills? What is fun about watching somebody just drain your finances?! 



I have to agree that there are too many ‘bleeders’ for comfort. I have seen some Mistresses bleed guys dry and then spit them out before moving on to the next one.
One guy I know who does the clubs and has been around on the scene for years, takes his hard earned cash in little brown envelopes to the clubs. He stacks shelves for a living and is probably on a very meagre basic wage. Certain Mistresses see him coming and they all sit in line asking for an envelope before he can have the pleasure of kissing their feet. These Mistresses know who he is and that he’s not got a fat wallet. Behind his back they mock him and call him a pathetic little parasite. When he's living in the street because he's been made homeless, would these wome toss him some spare change? I doubt it!
Ok so we could argue the point that the guy gets off on giving his money away (some do) but we could also argue the point that this guy actually needs help and he needs it fast and these women need to get out on the street and sell some pussy because as far as Im concerned that’s all they are worth.

Maria

< Message edited by Copulo -- 5/3/2007 2:48:08 PM >

(in reply to jaxbeachgirl)
Profile   Post #: 66
RE: Tributes - 5/3/2007 2:49:59 PM   
MissDiscipline


Posts: 117
Joined: 10/1/2006
From: Domme Beach Calif
Status: offline 		"Behind his back they mock him and call him a pathetic little parasite"    
 
How absolutely cruel- For the money he is paying,  they should do that to his face.

(in reply to Copulo)
Profile   Post #: 67
RE: Tributes - 5/3/2007 2:52:30 PM   
cjenny


Posts: 1736
Joined: 11/27/2006
Status: offline 		This is truly a subject I know little about, I have 1 question. When is the tribute asked for / expected?

_____________________________

*Unless I cite a source it is MO.


~ ssssh. i think i've just found freedom. ~

(in reply to MissDiscipline)
Profile   Post #: 68
RE: Tributes - 5/3/2007 2:53:12 PM   
Copulo


Posts: 268
Joined: 5/3/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MissDiscipline

"Behind his back they mock him and call him a pathetic little parasite"    
 
How absolutely cruel- For the money he is paying,  they should do that to his face.


Lol well yes if he's into that then fine but I recently saw a Mistress get a black eye from getting that bit of humiliation wrong.

Do you think they are all parasites?

(in reply to MissDiscipline)
Profile   Post #: 69
RE: Tributes - 5/3/2007 3:09:40 PM   
MissDiscipline


Posts: 117
Joined: 10/1/2006
From: Domme Beach Calif
Status: offline 		Tribute is asked  for and expected when  and if Y/you discuss it and agree upon it. I am sure it is very individual- One  of my request for tribute are worshiping moment  where I require a sub to take moments out of the day to focus his thoughts and meditate on Me.  Another request may be to compensate me financially because I  take off so many damn days from work for ass holes who cancell at the last moment-  There fore not wanting my bdsm life style to become  a financial burden I request  TRIBUTE before but never during or after. And this is the end of my story- cause this horse has been reincarnated and  beaten beyond any abuse this Domme could ever deliver. Unless of course you have been on this site for a LOOOOOONG time but never managed to figure out that people do what the hell they want - And if it offends someones little heart - when ever you see  the word tribute or anything that hints of monetary, financial  or cash requirements- Run Forest ! Run!

Damn! for got my pay pal  password...

(in reply to cjenny)
Profile   Post #: 70
RE: Tributes - 5/3/2007 3:14:35 PM   
MissDiscipline


Posts: 117
Joined: 10/1/2006
From: Domme Beach Calif
Status: offline 		Parasites-  a plant or animal that lives on or in another, usually larger, host organism in a way that harms or is of no advantage to the host
- scrounger: somebody who exploits others without doing anything in return.
NO I believe if there is  exchange then it is not  PARASITISM-lol I have no idea if that is a real word.- hee hee hee

(in reply to MissDiscipline)
Profile   Post #: 71
RE: Tributes - 5/3/2007 3:18:01 PM   
VeryMercurial


Posts: 620
Joined: 6/5/2006
Status: offline 		So many women come into the lifestyle and become Professionals because of the men
that really offer so little.
I have talked to many women that have told me that they only became Professionals because they
LOVE the lifestyle but got tired of catering to men that were Do Me's.
Again, why would ANY attractive woman or woman that has anything going for herself, dress up in
fetish ware, buy expensive toys and play games with men IF she is not in a serious relationship
with them?
Can anyone explain the logic of this?  Playing with virtual strangers so that they can get their jollies?
What the hell is the woman getting out of that?
A footrub? A massage? A manicure? 

< Message edited by VeryMercurial -- 5/3/2007 3:22:04 PM >

(in reply to MissDiscipline)
Profile   Post #: 72
RE: Tributes - 5/3/2007 3:21:08 PM   
MissDiscipline


Posts: 117
Joined: 10/1/2006
From: Domme Beach Calif
Status: offline 		"Can anyone explain the logic of this?  Playing with virtual strangers so that they can get their jollies?
What the hell is the woman getting out of that? "
Apparently  the woman is getting her jollies too!
Life is wondeful - I love being the woman...

(in reply to VeryMercurial)
Profile   Post #: 73
RE: Tributes - 5/3/2007 3:23:07 PM   
VeryMercurial


Posts: 620
Joined: 6/5/2006
Status: offline 		LOL, good for you MissDiscipline!
I love being a woman also.
That last post is for the men that are out looking for what they can get,
not give a woman.

< Message edited by VeryMercurial -- 5/3/2007 3:24:00 PM >

(in reply to MissDiscipline)
Profile   Post #: 74
RE: Tributes - 5/3/2007 3:54:47 PM   
Copulo


Posts: 268
Joined: 5/3/2007
Status: offline 		I think a lot of women become pro because they can and it’s a seriously quick way of earning some serious money. You can earn the same sort of money as a lawyer if your good and have a good location for a dungeon. Who wants to be earning £9 an hour when you can be earning anything between £150 to £500 an hour!!!

I have seen so many women that first come on the scene as subs and then start to play around with a bit of switching. The next thing you know they have some posh dungeon set up in the Barbican, working a 20 hour week and are very comfortably off

After a while though money is not everything. When you get an endless stream of slavering blubbery blubs through your door and you have to make your excuses half way through a session, to go to the toilet and vomit, you start to get a little disillusioned with the whole dominance thing. At least I did.
Im now happy to choose who I want, when I want!

Maria

(in reply to VeryMercurial)
Profile   Post #: 75
RE: Tributes - 5/3/2007 4:01:24 PM   
Jevousadore


Posts: 57
Joined: 5/17/2006
Status: offline 		Hello, lopoka......

Female submissive for male Doms here popping in with what will  probably be an unpopular opinion.....but such is life!  This is just my opinion from a submissive point of view on the other side.

First of all, regarding the comments about your post being a repeated topic.  Unless the abuse aspect is a fetish for you (if so, disregard this, pls), I think it's pretty sad to ridicule you for your question.  I have been on collarme for a year and have very few posts myself.  I simply don't have the time!  Everyone had to start from the beginning, even someone with 3000 posts. And, if it wasn't a topic people wanted to continue to discuss, it wouldn't be 4 pages long at this point.

Second, I would never send any type of tribute to a Dom to prove I wasn't "flaky".  If I disappear after several emails it is because something wasn't clicking or turned me off about the other person.  Even if you are flaky, that's just the way it goes sometimes on a site such as this. Dominants can be just as bad, and until they become YOUR Dom/Domme, you are still your own person.

Same goes for contributing toward "toys" or whatever name it is given.  That should come when you meet the other person and some sort of relationship is established. In other words, you shouldn't be paying for "toys" to be used with someone else.

I may have missed a point somewhere in the posts, but I find it interesting that there are negative reactions to the implication of a man "always driving the car", yet it is perfectly acceptable to engage in the world's oldest profession of prostitution, of which many women would consider to be anti-feminism and therefore a betrayal.  And for the record, I, personally, don't believe it should be illegal.  If someone wants to sell their wares, and another is willing to buy them, that is between the parties involved.  But I digress. 

If a male Dom were to demand or even request a "tribute" from me, I would define him as a whore.  Someone who engages in sexual acts for recompense.  I don't see a difference when the sexes are swapped.

Again, if it is what you are looking for, whether as a fetish or convenience, it is one thing.  But I would say that if it isn't, and you have doubts or concerns, move along to the next profile.  Someone demanding proof of that type from you does not make them any more real than another.

Just my humble opinion.

jevousadore



_____________________________

“That little man in black says woman can’t have as much rights as man because Jesus wasn’t a woman. Where did your Christ come from? Where did He come from? From God and a woman. Man had nothing to do with Him.” - Sojourner Truth

(in reply to lopoka)
Profile   Post #: 76
RE: Tributes - 5/3/2007 4:01:37 PM   
DianeB269


Posts: 1596
Joined: 10/30/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Copulo

I think a lot of women become pro because they can and it’s a seriously quick way of earning some serious money. You can earn the same sort of money as a lawyer if your good and have a good location for a dungeon. Who wants to be earning £9 an hour when you can be earning anything between £150 to £500 an hour!!!

I have seen so many women that first come on the scene as subs and then start to play around with a bit of switching. The next thing you know they have some posh dungeon set up in the Barbican, working a 20 hour week and are very comfortably off


Maria



This is why I went pro years ago.....It's very easy money and you don't really work very
hard cuz, there is a endless supply of clients. I bought 2 houses in 12 years working as
a pro.

Diane

PS; I retired 5 years ago.

(in reply to Copulo)
Profile   Post #: 77
RE: Tributes - 5/3/2007 4:47:04 PM   
MistressRouge


Posts: 876
Joined: 3/18/2005
From: Birmingham West Midlands UK
Status: offline 		Pro Domme's that are in it just for the £ $, well their careers will be short lived I am sure.

submissive's are most definatley not stupid, they can tell when a Domme Mistress has the flair and enthusiasm, a genuine love for her work. I do emensley, and I wish to indulge in this wonderful lifestyle for many decades to come!

subs that have a problem with tribute, are just sucking on sour grapes, in My Dominant opinion.

 

(in reply to DianeB269)
Profile   Post #: 78
RE: Tributes - 5/3/2007 4:48:30 PM   
MistressRouge


Posts: 876
Joined: 3/18/2005
From: Birmingham West Midlands UK
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DianeB269

quote:

ORIGINAL: Copulo

I think a lot of women become pro because they can and it’s a seriously quick way of earning some serious money. You can earn the same sort of money as a lawyer if your good and have a good location for a dungeon. Who wants to be earning £9 an hour when you can be earning anything between £150 to £500 an hour!!!

I have seen so many women that first come on the scene as subs and then start to play around with a bit of switching. The next thing you know they have some posh dungeon set up in the Barbican, working a 20 hour week and are very comfortably off


Maria



This is why I went pro years ago.....It's very easy money and you don't really work very
hard cuz, there is a endless supply of clients. I bought 2 houses in 12 years working as
a pro.

Diane

PS; I retired 5 years ago.


Fabulous Diane  x

(in reply to DianeB269)
Profile   Post #: 79
RE: Tributes - 5/3/2007 6:52:54 PM   
undergroundsea


Posts: 2400
Joined: 6/27/2004
From: Austin, TX
Status: offline 		The word tribute is used broadly in this discussion. When I say tribute I mean money or a gift demanded to initiate or sustain contact in a non-professional relationship. My focus here is on women who claim they are seeking a personal relationship and demand tribute for a show of sincerity to weed out insincere men.

I wager there are many women who seek tribute who already have or during the course of time find a partner who does provide what they seek. I wager there are gay women who otherwise have no interest to play with men who get in on tribute. I am not compelled by the explanation that tribute is caused by men who want to be done. In my opinion, saying so is shifting responsibility onto men for a decision for which one is seeking justification internally and externally. There are men who want sexual gratification across all orientations. Why cannot one who claims to seek tribute because it is necessary pass the men who are seeking sexual gratification in favor of those who are sincere, as women do across other orientations? Why not instead choose a man with whom one enjoys BDSM play?

In my opinion tribute is not charged because it must be but because it can be.

I do not participate in relationships that require a material exchange because it is inconsistent with my social objectives and sense of self. I am interested to engage with someone because of mutual interest. And I feel I can give enough with what I am as a person to expect interest in me. This approach has worked reasonably well for me.

I pass on a profile from a person seeking tribute because I am uninterested to remain wondering whether it is a scam or not. I pass on such a profile because I feel the person seeking tribute has too different a perspective on how our interaction or relationship should occur. And I pass because I know I am able to find other options. So a claim that tribute is to weed out insincere men is somewhat ironical because it will send away men who feel as I do who are out to give in return.

Cheers,

Sea

< Message edited by undergroundsea -- 5/3/2007 7:37:09 PM >

(in reply to MistressRouge)
Profile   Post #: 80
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