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RE: Creating the Perfect slave - 5/5/2005 6:42:22 PM   
glassdoll


Posts: 131
Joined: 4/24/2005
Status: offline 		you can't entirely shape a person-- and going out for that perfet beau is more about the hunt than the catch.

(in reply to QnofH3arts)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Creating the Perfect slave - 5/5/2005 6:52:10 PM   
LadyAngelika


Posts: 8070
Joined: 7/4/2004
Status: offline
quote:

My typical response to those is "if I wanted a doormat, I'd go to (insert favorite store here) and buy one for $5"


Oh man! I saw the most beautiful doormat at Caban tonight but it was $87,00. Maybe I should consider financial domination...

- LA

_____________________________

Une main de fer dans un gant de velours ~ An iron hand in a velvet glove

(in reply to SweetDommes)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Creating the Perfect slave - 5/5/2005 8:25:06 PM   
QnofH3arts


Posts: 35
Joined: 6/19/2004
Status: offline
quote:

There's nothing wrong with teaching (molding) a submissive or a slave, it enhances the bond between Dominant and property, I believe it helps give purpose to the relationship. Would you not train a new puppy? Do married couples not train each other in subtle ways? Why should this be any different? You know what you like, there may be someone out there who is into and desires the same thing...they need to be taught, trained, or molded into that which closely resembles what it is you are after.


For the sake of argument, though, (since this thread has gotten a bit off track), let Us consider the fantasy of reshaping a man in the image We desire. No, We are not kidnapping someone off the streets, but instead have entered into a consensual relationship with someone who wants to try living this fantasy. Someone who really does come close to meeting most of Our criteria. As it happens in this fantasy, We are all financially independent and can take as much time off work as necessary to fully immerse Ourselves in the training.

How do We go about this training in such a way as to create what We want without losing what We already enjoy and appreciate about this man? And how much time could We realistically last in a fantasy such as this?

(in reply to Kindred2Evil)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Creating the Perfect slave - 5/5/2005 11:04:06 PM   
SweetDommes


Posts: 3313
Joined: 10/5/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyAngelika

quote:

My typical response to those is "if I wanted a doormat, I'd go to (insert favorite store here) and buy one for $5"


Oh man! I saw the most beautiful doormat at Caban tonight but it was $87,00. Maybe I should consider financial domination...

- LA


Heh, none of my favorite stores have stuff that expensive (at least, not unless it's an area rug rather than a door mat) - we're poor LOL

(in reply to LadyAngelika)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Creating the Perfect slave - 5/5/2005 11:07:07 PM   
SweetDommes


Posts: 3313
Joined: 10/5/2004
Status: offline 		I'm not sure about this - I mean, most of the things that I expect to be done a certain way are pretty simple. And in general, most of the guys that we talk to are fairly to very intelligent, and learn quickly what we expect of them in terms of online so in theory, would catch on to what we want in r/l fairly quickly as well. While it would be nice to take a few weeks off to train I can't see taking more than a week - I would probably get bored if it really required that much time.

(in reply to QnofH3arts)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Creating the Perfect slave - 5/6/2005 4:16:27 AM   
anthrosub


Posts: 843
Joined: 6/2/2004
Status: offline 		Of all the profiles I've seen over the years, I've only seen one from a Domme stating her intention was to take a male and literally make him disappear off the face of the earth. But then, her profile showed her age to be very young (around 20 if I remember right), so that might account for having such an extreme idea. I've thought about how the D/s dynamic would develop between partners many times.

Initially, there would be a discovery period. Finding out what's already functional or matches the Domme's intent and identifying what areas need reshaping. The next stage would be the actual (and most focused) training period and would likely not take very long. During this stage, the sub would be introduced to his new life and oriented about the Domme's ultimate goal. From there, it would be a simple matter of reinforcement conditioning.

I think something similar occurs in vanilla relationships but there, the conditioning and reinforcement is not overt. It's more in the background and only comes to the fore during discussions about how each partner is feeling regarding each other and the relationship as a whole. Each partner in a vanilla relationship is conditioning the other indirectly and commonly refers to this dynamic as "getting to know each other."

anthrosub

_____________________________

"It is easier to fool people than it is to convince them they have been fooled." - Mark Twain

"I am not young enough to know everything." - Oscar Wilde

(in reply to SweetDommes)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Creating the Perfect slave - 5/6/2005 9:35:19 AM   
Dave8544


Posts: 49
Joined: 7/23/2004
Status: offline
quote:

So is it only Me or do all of you Ladies receive emails from men offering themselves up as "blank canvasses" to be remade in the way that would please Us most?

This is what the game players do, seems so many women seem to want this.

(in reply to QnofH3arts)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Creating the Perfect slave - 5/6/2005 3:50:19 PM   
LadyAngelika


Posts: 8070
Joined: 7/4/2004
Status: offline
quote:

I think something similar occurs in vanilla relationships but there, the conditioning and reinforcement is not overt.


Exactly. It's passive aggressive most usually.

As I said, we should look for our right matches and not start trying to break down and rebuild people. That's my take on it for what it's worth.

- LA

_____________________________

Une main de fer dans un gant de velours ~ An iron hand in a velvet glove

(in reply to anthrosub)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Creating the Perfect slave - 5/6/2005 11:30:32 PM   
SweetDommes


Posts: 3313
Joined: 10/5/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Dave8544

quote:

So is it only Me or do all of you Ladies receive emails from men offering themselves up as "blank canvasses" to be remade in the way that would please Us most?


This is what the game players do, seems so many women seem to want this.


Actually, that is what males seem to think that we want. I don't know of any - vanilla or otherwise - who are serious about wanting a relationship who honestly want a blank canvass. Some may say that about certain aspects (like, they don't want someone who is already trained in D/s by someone else so that they won't have to retrain) but not the entire person.

(in reply to Dave8544)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Creating the Perfect slave - 5/8/2005 5:54:22 PM   
MsPurrmeow


Posts: 261
Joined: 10/30/2004
Status: offline 		I think the concept of "breaking a man" or taking him completely out of the world is simply from the sexual fantasy side (the man's sexual fantasy.) Such extremes are great for temporary roleplay, but are not even the least bit attractive to me as potential slaves.

The snivelling garbage that most men spew that they really think is attractive to Dominant women does not serve them well, and usually it's why they are on the market for a long, long time. If a man presented himself to me as an educated, intelligent, life-experienced individual who was seeking someone to serve from a position of strength, courage and dedication, that would be the end of my search.

Too many men think that we want pre-weakened pile of mud to construct with. If they really had the respect for women and dominants that they claim, they would understand that they are assigning us a lot of work and responsibility that is not about pleasure for most of us. (Caveat being the playtime and power exchange games that CAN be exciting.) I need a slave I can respect, because without respect, I would not trust them with caring for me.

Purr

(in reply to SweetDommes)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Creating the Perfect slave - 5/11/2005 12:43:59 AM   
mirado


Posts: 1
Joined: 2/18/2005
Status: offline 		I truly do not understand the concept of “breaking” in this context. In my particular worldview, my submission is dedicated to enhance the life of both my Domme and myself. Training is a methodology whereby She helps me reach higher levels of service and a far more intense exchange of power, which benefits both parties. Stated differently, if it was necessary for Her to “break me” (via training or otherwise), my submission would be valueless as an initial matter, and there would be minimal opportunity for enhancement of either parties’ life experience. A paradigm in which a submissive would require a complete reformatting of his psycho-spiritual hard drive in order to meet his Domme’s expectations arises from either the most pedestrian and misplaced of submale fantasies or from a Domme’s quiet, and quite understandable, desperation that the “perfect” slave for Her does not exist.

< Message edited by mirado -- 5/11/2005 12:50:12 AM >

(in reply to MsPurrmeow)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Creating the Perfect slave - 5/12/2005 10:32:12 AM   
MaitresseEden


Posts: 477
Joined: 8/8/2004
From: Houston, Texas
Status: offline
quote:

I truly do not understand the concept of “breaking” in this context. In my particular worldview, my submission is dedicated to enhance the life of both my Domme and myself. Training is a methodology whereby She helps me reach higher levels of service and a far more intense exchange of power, which benefits both parties. Stated differently, if it was necessary for Her to “break me” (via training or otherwise), my submission would be valueless as an initial matter, and there would be minimal opportunity for enhancement of either parties’ life experience. A paradigm in which a submissive would require a complete reformatting of his psycho-spiritual hard drive in order to meet his Domme’s expectations arises from either the most pedestrian and misplaced of submale fantasies or from a Domme’s quiet, and quite understandable, desperation that the “perfect” slave for Her does not exist.



Well Said!.. Bravo!

Ms. Eden

_____________________________

"If I didnt define myself for myself, I would be crunched into other peoples fantasies for me and eaten alive. - Audre Lorde"

(in reply to mirado)
Profile   Post #: 32
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