RE: Differences - Master/Dom and slave/sub (Full Version)

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Snake -> RE: Differences - Master/Dom and slave/sub (5/4/2007 2:31:33 AM)

A good question , I think to most of the general public it means more of a total commitment then in a Dom/sub relationship more TPE but in fact it ( my experience) doesnt have to be ,it is what you decide it is. To me a Master slave has a deeper mental bond ,the ying and the yang ,the two mesh and make one whole .
After 30 plus years it is still hard to put into words ,interesting,as I said  ''good question"




UglyFatMaster -> RE: Differences - Master/Dom and slave/sub (5/4/2007 3:34:20 AM)

I grew up in a Master/slave household. My Father was the most dominant man I've ever known (even to this day). When I became a man, which meant standing up as a man to my Father, he gave me his blessing and allowed me to join the Navy.
I was stationed in the Philippines, where I purchased my first slave for 70.00usd. She served me very well and I added a maid and a houseboy to my slave chain.
My governemt found out I had purchased human beings and I was sent back to the USA and discharged. My Father explained my error and I have continued my lifestyle. That was back in the 70's.
Since then, I have met both subs and slaves. "Consentual" slaves are somewhat different than real slaves but once in a while, one can find a good one. I tend to like the Gorean model because once they are convinced that Gor doesn't exist, their training and mannerisms are excellent.
While I have no use for subs, I do not dislike them. They are just not my cup of tea. Many (not all) seem to go through life getting what they want because there are so many who are willing to compromise their dominance for sex. This is neither right or wrong but I do not live that way.
I hope this answers your question.




IrishMist -> RE: Differences - Master/Dom and slave/sub (5/4/2007 3:39:23 AM)

NOt really lol. You said that
quote:

  A sub, on the other hand and in my experience, seems to be more after the "relationship" aspect of it all.


which is what I was curious as to.

In my experience, ALL are interested in the relationship aspect; slaves included.

I am just curious as to how you came up with the idea that only submissives were.




UglyFatMaster -> RE: Differences - Master/Dom and slave/sub (5/4/2007 4:21:09 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: IrishMist

In my experience, ALL are interested in the relationship aspect; slaves included.



I think we are getting lost in semantics again. Yes, all interactions between two or more beings can be seen as a relationship. In my world view, an Owner does not have to be a "loving Master", as long as the slave's essential needs are met.
I am not interested in whether a slave feels loved. Many of the subs I have met or have read their profiles, claim to want some type of loving relationship. Note that I say "many". Not all are that way. Some pride themselves in their brattiness and others have even more different ways of being who they are.
So, in direct answer to your question on how I came to this idea, my answer is life experience and the reading/talking with people. This should have been obvious since even the part you quoted said "in my experience". But I have repeated it for you with a bit more detail in case I was unclear.




IrishMist -> RE: Differences - Master/Dom and slave/sub (5/4/2007 4:29:55 AM)

Ahhh...you are talking about emotions. Ok, that makes what you said more understandable. Thank you




MasterFireMaam -> RE: Differences - Master/Dom and slave/sub (5/4/2007 8:25:53 AM)

For me, Master/slave are spiritual roles while Dom/sub are mental roles. Top/bottom are physical roles. But, you'll get as many answers as there are people.

Master Fire




Celeste43 -> RE: Differences - Master/Dom and slave/sub (5/4/2007 12:34:25 PM)

We're 24/7. He has gradually acquired control in every area he feels requires it. But we're D/s not M/s because neither of us likes the words master or slave. He is a dominant man not a master man, I'm a submissive female (to him alone) not a slave female. We view this as personality traits, therefore the words are adjectives and not nouns.

Quite honestly, there are subs out there who are more obedient than some slaves and doms who take more control than some masters. The label doesn't matter except for those involved in the relationship.




ErusDespicienta -> RE: Differences - Master/Dom and slave/sub (5/4/2007 12:51:59 PM)

So we can't define "slave" because it's illegal. . which means we can't define "a submissive" either since it's also illegal , gramatically that is !  Submissive is not a noun.  So legally (gramatically) you cannot be ~a submissive~  There is no such thing.

Bet this starts a fire [;)]




robertolapiedra -> RE: Differences - Master/Dom and slave/sub (5/4/2007 9:49:24 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: Celeste43

We're 24/7. He has gradually acquired control in every area he feels requires it. But we're D/s not M/s because neither of us likes the words master or slave. He is a dominant man not a master man, I'm a submissive female (to him alone) not a slave female. We view this as personality traits, therefore the words are adjectives and not nouns.

Quite honestly, there are subs out there who are more obedient than some slaves and doms who take more control than some masters. The label doesn't matter except for those involved in the relationship.


This lady is very smart! I have been asked this question a thousand times and there is no answer because it is not a true question...

A 'master' is dominant and a 'slave' is submissive right? it is just wordplay and not in the realm of semantics wich could give us a little help in understanding the 'difference'.

For example, my wife is a sexslave. That is what she likes, that's what she wants and that's what she does... am I her sexmaster? I am sure that for some 'being' a slave has to do with something much larger than sexuality alone. For others it is only sex or it is a question of 'intensity' (more than, less than...)

From what I gather, a slave master relationship is a type of dom/sub relationship wich is hard to define because it is difficult to establish the consensus on the 'stereotype'. It is not important, as you like use the porn industry stereotype, use the historical stereotype or whatever you want consensually it does not matter. What matters is what works and makes you happy in a relationship. RL.





phoenixinchains -> RE: Differences - Master/Dom and slave/sub (5/4/2007 11:48:35 PM)

i like FireMasterMaam's interpritation,,,




masterelf -> RE: Differences - Master/Dom and slave/sub (5/7/2007 9:04:33 PM)

I agree with little on this one as that is greatly my view as well, I am a slave to Master Elf and he is my caretaker, my mentor, my disciplinarian, my love, my control, and my decision maker.
Slave Francine
Slave to Master Elf of the House of Elf
quote:

ORIGINAL: littleone35

I would disagree with the Op I am a sub and i belong to Master 24/7.  To me and this is only my opnion an Dom is someone who is interested in play and a Master is someone who is interested in owning and taking care of his sub/slave.

As in the same old sub  vs slave to me is this a slave give up all control to the one who owns her and a sub retains some control over her life.

Matt's littleone




sweetnessforsir -> RE: Differences - Master/Dom and slave/sub (5/7/2007 9:13:37 PM)

In this 24/7, the semantics were discussed quite ferverently for the first several months.  However, I am a submissive and He is a Master and W/we are very happy with each other. 

stephanie




Pezzle -> RE: Differences - Master/Dom and slave/sub (5/8/2007 10:55:06 PM)

It all depends on your relationship, I think. My Master uses the words 'submissive' and 'slave' interchangeably when referring to me. It is a title he calls me. I also use the term 'Dom' but more or less stick with Master. It is what he has me call him and that is what he is to me. He thinks of me as his slave, but refers to me as submissive more so -- perhaps because he is still 'breaking me in' so to speak (in the same fashion one is broken in basic training). It's almost a status to us... so really the terminology is all subjective to the pairing using it. And really our lifestyle is somewhat 24/7, but it is rather complicated to explain and I do believe this is not the correct post to put that in.

I'll get boring for a moment...

From a rather sterile and DSM style point of view, D/s is the proper term to describe power play relationships that don't necessarlly incur the use of restraints.

Don't mind me, just studying for an exam I have tomorrow -- Human Sexuality of all things.





WillowRain -> RE: Differences - Master/Dom and slave/sub (5/9/2007 1:44:03 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: UglyFatMaster

I know this has probably been brought up before but after a cursory look, I 've decided to bring it up again.
Having been around awhile, I wonder if it's just semantics or is there actually some lines drawn somewhere? How is a Master different than a Dom? How is a slave different than a sub?
I know what my answer is but apparently, I must be a bit off. To me, a Master/slave relationship is 24/7 and a Dom/sub is once in a while. Of course, each has its own rules. But I want to see how others define the differences.



This is a hugely personal thing. You might as well ask everyone if and how they like their feet rubbed.
But, one opinion, and this is just me, and just in relation to me.
Master = someone who has gained a certain knowledge base, skill level, and competance in any subject or medium.                     Better at it than the average bear, someone others come to for lessons, help, guidance.
Dominant = A person who self defines themself as a dominant in the bdsm culture. Can really mean anything, probably                 they at least top, may have submissives, may not. It is an orientation, or chosen role.
My Dominant = My Sir (to complicated to easily define, but someone I trust enough to let them make choices,                             someone I can comfortably let lead, a person I can trust and follow. Devotion object. Loved one. Dear                         friend. Cherished companion)
My Master = as yet undefined, kinda, maybe not, makes me feel spastic to even think about it. To me it means trusting                 someone enough to let them make any choice they want to about you or your life. That is very intense as an                 idea and scary to me. Kinda beautiful scary, but scary. I can't talk about this one much or I'll have to go                         breath in a paperbag.




shyinini -> RE: Differences - Master/Dom and slave/sub (5/9/2007 1:56:24 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: littleone35

I would disagree with the Op I am a sub and i belong to Master 24/7.  To me and this is only my opnion an Dom is someone who is interested in play and a Master is someone who is interested in owning and taking care of his sub/slave.

As in the same old sub  vs slave to me is this a slave give up all control to the one who owns her and a sub retains some control over her life.

Matt's littleone


And I disagree with littlone.

But then I disagree with labels in general.
One controls and one gives up control.
The amount of control one wishes to take and the amount of control one wishes to give up makes a big difference.
What one wishes to control, have authority over is another matter.
Sir wishes me NOT ever to call him master because of the last Dom I had.
He also told me, as others who are in lifestyle in his circle, I would be a slave, but I am his submissive, he says, and that is all I need to know.
 
Isnt it marvelous every relationship is different?
[:)]




Celeste43 -> RE: Differences - Master/Dom and slave/sub (5/10/2007 12:39:56 PM)

We're 24/7 and we're D/s not M/s. Just by our existence, we mess up your definitions. But the labels others use don't matter to us.

For us, he prefers to know I want to be with him and that I don't feel that I have to be with him unwillingly. I don't call myself a slave because to a Jew with any religious background or cultural education slave refers to the Nazi death camps. I don't do body modifications for the same reason. No tattos, no multiple piercings (Earlobes only). I find the term if applied to me offensive as can be.




naivetee -> RE: Differences - Master/Dom and slave/sub (5/12/2007 7:31:33 AM)

Personally, (and that means to me only) I could never be called a slave, as to me, that is giving up total control over myself. Again, to me, I am not a doormat...I am a sub. I believe in every person's specialness and their right to have individual control over themselves..and their potential. That is me.  :P  How you choose to fit that into your relationship with your other half, is your choice.  :)




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