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So you are a Master! - 11/1/2013 12:35:32 PM

KnightofMists

Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
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So you are a Master and you got your slave to prove it!

Small problem.

- You don't know much about punishment in fact you never even punished you dog let alone a human.
- you never done any training before gosh what should I train the slave to do?
- you never really been responsible for anyone before not even babysitting!
- you never did this and that and that and this.. But!

Your a master and you have your slave to prove it!

===========================

Don't you just love it when the person suddenly thinks its cool to be a Master... Well cause it is, is it not? But they just don't have the first clue about it just the same. They come on the boards, trying not to look stupid and ask well... Question that damn you should already know if you gonna be a master. Like really.. You can't count to three and you in grade one? Geeeez where have you been hiding!

So in instead of ranting about those that jump in the pool withou even a thought about knowing how to swim let alone that water is wet and how deep it is! I ask this question!

What tools, skills, abilities, knowledge, character etc etc etc are pretty important to enter into Master 101 class let alone pass the class. Those prerequisites .... What are they... Come now... Let's give some new people some help that they sort of should have a handle on.... BEFORE they strut along singing they are a Master! With there slave in tow of course.

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

Post #: 1

RE: So you are a Master! - 11/1/2013 12:40:58 PM

mnottertail

Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline

quote:

With there slave in tow of course.

They should know the proper usage of their and there.

Well, yanno, master is as ubiquitous a name as cocksucker in the company jargon.

Everyone starts somewhere.

Rage against the machine? Prolly shouldnt have it.
Balance a checkbook? Prolly should have it.
A habitual conviction record? Prolly shouldnt have it.
A house (some place of your own that you pay for), job, responsibility, some personableness and personality. Prolly should have it.

Ugh, K.....to write the complete works, is a daunting task, glad I am e pluribus unum.

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30

(in reply to KnightofMists)

Post #: 2

RE: So you are a Master! - 11/1/2013 1:01:27 PM

Spiritedsub2

Posts: 3316
Joined: 7/18/2012
Status: offline

~fr

I recently had a 30 year old "Master" message me saying he's unemployed, living in his car, and he wants to live with me and allow me to serve him (including blow jobs, nodding to Ron).

I feel about your question the way I do about the "critique my profile to make it attractive to women" threads. In profiles I want to see the real person, not artifice. Regarding masters, why give people tips and tricks to model mastery? Isn't mastery (and dominance) intrinsic? A master or dominant acts from his nature, and if he doesn't know how, I vastly prefer to see that.

_____________________________

Don’t grieve. Anything you lose comes round in another form.
~ Rumi

Laughing Dolphin

(in reply to mnottertail)

Post #: 3

RE: So you are a Master! - 11/1/2013 1:05:51 PM

Blonderfluff

Posts: 2253
Joined: 10/9/2013
From: Down the Shore
Status: offline

self-control and honesty.

After that.

What spirited sub said. ^^^^Let's not make it any easier for the inexperienced to get the knowledge the easy way. Learn and earn it.

_____________________________

Don't fear moving forward slowly...fear standing still.

I'm Blonde. Jane Blonde.

(in reply to Spiritedsub2)

Post #: 4

RE: So you are a Master! - 11/1/2013 1:09:15 PM

Blonderfluff

Posts: 2253
Joined: 10/9/2013
From: Down the Shore
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: mnottertail

quote:

With there slave in tow of course.

They should know the proper usage of their and there.

Well, yanno, master is as ubiquitous a name as cocksucker in the company jargon.

Everyone starts somewhere.

Rage against the machine? Prolly shouldnt have it.
Balance a checkbook? Prolly should have it.
A habitual conviction record? Prolly shouldnt have it.
A house (some place of your own that you pay for), job, responsibility, some personableness and personality. Prolly should have it.

Ugh, K.....to write the complete works, is a daunting task, glad I am e pluribus unum.

Oh. And the proper use of your. And You're Also, to And too.

Unless, when you say "to funny" you are Actually on a quest to FIND funny. In that case, it's appropriate.

< Message edited by Blonderfluff -- 11/1/2013 1:10:08 PM >

_____________________________

Don't fear moving forward slowly...fear standing still.

I'm Blonde. Jane Blonde.

(in reply to mnottertail)

Post #: 5

RE: So you are a Master! - 11/1/2013 1:09:56 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

The term master just means in a relationship with a slave. It doesn't imply competence.

There are a lot of guys out there who are fathers because they got some girl pregnant. Doesn't mean they have any relationship or responsibility to the child. It doesn't mean they're good fathers.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to Blonderfluff)

Post #: 6

RE: So you are a Master! - 11/1/2013 1:44:46 PM

KnightofMists

Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

The term master just means in a relationship with a slave. It doesn't imply competence.

There are a lot of guys out there who are fathers because they got some girl pregnant. Doesn't mean they have any relationship or responsibility to the child. It doesn't mean they're good fathers.

Hel yeah.... So instead of just letting them go fucking... Maybe we try to help those gonna listen to be better fathers... Cause after all they are gonna fuck.

Or we can do as spirited sub suggests... Let them go fuck and see after the fact if any of them are good fathers. Cause let's face it... It's only tricks to be a master and we all know S types are gonna fall for that shallow shit!

No... It not tricks and bulshit... In fact I thing ideas like spiritedsub are part of the problem! And definitely not part of the solution.

Honesty is not trick.

Self awareness and introspective is not a trick

Time management and conflict resolution skills are not tricks.

Critical thinking and decision making skills are not tricks.

And the list goes on.

< Message edited by KnightofMists -- 11/1/2013 1:45:50 PM >

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 7

RE: So you are a Master! - 11/1/2013 2:06:13 PM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

I tend to call those sperm donors, Des.

OK, OK.......

quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists
What tools, skills, abilities, knowledge, character etc etc etc are pretty important to enter into Master 101 class let alone pass the class. Those prerequisites .... What are they... Come now... Let's give some new people some help that they sort of should have a handle on.... BEFORE they strut along singing they are a Master! With there slave in tow of course.

I don't think it's going to shock anybody on this board that My first answer is going to be an education. I'm skipping all of the topping stuff because the question specifically refers to M/s. The way to get that education is to learn from those who already know what they are doing. I'm not a huge fan of attempting to do that through a message board, though sometimes, it can work. I'm a greater proponent of getting out to the local community to actually SEE with your own eyes how other people's dynamics work.

People don't like when I say this because a relationship isn't supposed to be "work" but management skills from a person's professional life can be a serious plus. How exactly do you punish a person or have a corrective action plan? Ever compare one of these threads that we have around here about adjusting behavior or how to deal with unacceptable behavior and stick it up against a human resource manual from a corporation that has written policies about employee standards? Try it. They are ridiculously similar.

The ability comes from being able to carry such a thing out. If you've ever worked with even thirty people under you, it's not hard to pick up the difference between the letter of the law in policy and balance that out with personalities. You learn that certain methods work with certain people and you might have to take a completely different approach with someone else.

Character. This always translate to Me as "be a good human being." Part of that is to be the person that you would aspire to be. Honesty might not always be the easiest thing but you choose every single time that you take that path or not. Continual learning on things like how to have healthy relationships. That doesn't have to start with the bright, shiny, new slave. What about your other relationships like your friends, family, and your community? Do you know how to participate in a healthy way? Build and foster those relationships? If you don't, learn how to do that.

Yeah, kind of a long post, but it's really just the tip of the iceberg.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 8

RE: So you are a Master! - 11/1/2013 2:23:31 PM

mnottertail

Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline

and they should understand the stupid chicken dance.

http://www.collarchat.com/m_100186/mpage_1/tm.htm#100186

and you can quote me.

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 9

RE: So you are a Master! - 11/1/2013 3:22:20 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

I'm not saying they're people I would respect, KOM. Because I don't.
But I don't see how you're going to enforce this.

And spiritedsub has a valid point. Not that these dudes shouldn't learn, because they should.
But how do you teach someone over a website to crave the responsibility more than the rights? I don't think you can. I think this is the crux of the problem. And if they didn't learn it growing up, or in the army, then the only way is through therapy. Which you can't do in a forum.

What you don't want to do is just teach them the right thing to say, to talk the talk but not to walk the walk, because that just means they'll be more likely to do harm. And that's what spiritedsub was saying. Don't teach them the right buzzwords to throw around, so they can convince someone to meet with them. If they aren't interested in becoming people with integrity, then all you will do is teach them to be better at hiding their sociopathology. And I hope you'll agree that would be a bad thing.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to mnottertail)

Post #: 10

RE: So you are a Master! - 11/1/2013 3:23:52 PM

Spiritedsub2

Posts: 3316
Joined: 7/18/2012
Status: offline

Honest people don't need to be taught how to be honest.
Fathers (not just sperm donors) don't need to be taught to love and care for their kids.
Introspective people don't need to be taught to look at themselves and within.
Loving people don't need to be taught to love.

Teaching people to ape behaviors that don't come from their intrinsic nature results in ephemeral conduct, easily falling by the wayside over time or under stress because it is without foundation.

Edit: DesFip just said it much better than I did.

< Message edited by Spiritedsub2 -- 11/1/2013 3:24:56 PM >

_____________________________

Don’t grieve. Anything you lose comes round in another form.
~ Rumi

Laughing Dolphin

(in reply to KnightofMists)

Post #: 11

RE: So you are a Master! - 11/1/2013 3:41:00 PM

KnightofMists

Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: DesFIP

I'm not saying they're people I would respect, KOM. Because I don't.
But I don't see how you're going to enforce this.

And spiritedsub has a valid point. Not that these dudes shouldn't learn, because they should.
But how do you teach someone over a website to crave the responsibility more than the rights? I don't think you can. I think this is the crux of the problem. And if they didn't learn it growing up, or in the army, then the only way is through therapy. Which you can't do in a forum.

What you don't want to do is just teach them the right thing to say, to talk the talk but not to walk the walk, because that just means they'll be more likely to do harm. And that's what spiritedsub was saying. Don't teach them the right buzzwords to throw around, so they can convince someone to meet with them. If they aren't interested in becoming people with integrity, then all you will do is teach them to be better at hiding their sociopathology. And I hope you'll agree that would be a bad thing.

Enforce it? Me. Hell no! What's that line about good men doing nothing.... Kinda applies don't you think? Hell on this board.... An idiot gets tarred and feqthered pretty damn quick.... At the same time... I seen some great patience and teaching being given to one one wanting it. So enforce... I think we just keep trying to do we is happening... Call shit when it's there.... And give that kindness to share when deserving. No need for the police.... I am very happy we the mob just doing what the mob does over all..... But I do think individuals should hid in the mob either. You definitely don't! I might not agree with what yous say... Sometimes I might thing its absolute horse shit! But damn... I have tremendous respect that you say it! You stand up and make sure your counted........ I respect that! A lot

I agree that we not looking to teach the talk without the walk. But.... I am also thinking.... It's making sure people are looking at the walk and not just the talk! Frankly... They already know the buzz words all those idiots.... But there are fools that are just seeing the buzzwords... The problem can't be fix from one direction so to speak........ Sometimes we get what we settle for.... I think we should settle for more don't you?

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to DesFIP)

Post #: 12

RE: So you are a Master! - 11/1/2013 3:46:30 PM

KnightofMists

Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Spiritedsub2

Honest people don't need to be taught how to be honest.
Fathers (not just sperm donors) don't need to be taught to love and care for their kids.
Introspective people don't need to be taught to look at themselves and within.
Loving people don't need to be taught to love.

Teaching people to ape behaviors that don't come from their intrinsic nature results in ephemeral conduct, easily falling by the wayside over time or under stress because it is without foundation.

Edit: DesFip just said it much better than I did.

I agree. Can't teach to be honest... Or to love and desire to care.....

But you know..... As much as you say you honest and you and care.... Show me. How do you show! W

When do you know a person is introspective... How does that show up?

Show me the money! Love that line lol... So has the talk.... But how do we recognize the walk.... And that can't be faked consistently over time. If they can walked it.... Just maybe they are worth more time

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to Spiritedsub2)

Post #: 13

RE: So you are a Master! - 11/1/2013 5:05:54 PM

DarkSteven

Posts: 28072
Joined: 5/2/2008
Status: offline

When some guy with two days of experience, all online, posts and calls himself a Master, I usually mention that I have twelve years of experience and still don't consider myself one. I congratulate him on having achieved the title so early. Not one of them has picked up yet on the sarcasm.

_____________________________

"You women....

The small-breasted ones want larger breasts. The large-breasted ones want smaller ones. The straight-haired ones curl their hair, and the curly-haired ones straighten theirs...

Quit fretting. We men love you."

(in reply to KnightofMists)

Post #: 14

RE: So you are a Master! - 11/1/2013 5:08:46 PM

KnightofMists

Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: DarkSteven

When some guy with two days of experience, all online, posts and calls himself a Master, I usually mention that I have twelve years of experience and still don't consider myself one. I congratulate him on having achieved the title so early. Not one of them has picked up yet on the sarcasm.

Maybe they just figuring you a slllllowww learner..... You know you being old and all

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to DarkSteven)

Post #: 15

RE: So you are a Master! - 11/1/2013 7:53:57 PM

LadyPact

Posts: 32566
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Spiritedsub2
Honest people don't need to be taught how to be honest.

Actually, they do. To be more precise, they have to be untaught the practice of dishonesty.

Fascinating stuff, really. It's related to early childhood development. Somewhere around the age of 2/3 we become cognizant of actions/consequences, and ways that we can manipulate the outcome. I'm no expert, of course, but it goes something like this.......

Toddler takes the forbidden cookie. Adult comes along, asks the toddler if they took the cookie. In the beginning of this development phase, the toddler will answer in the affirmative. The toddler then experiences the negative result.

Later in the phase, the toddler takes the forbidden cookie. Adult comes along, asks the toddler if they took the cookie. The toddler doesn't really have a fully formed sense of right and wrong, so rather than preventing the action that causes the negative outcome, they learn to manipulate the situation. If telling the adult "no" reduces or eliminates the negative consequences, congratulations! The child has now learned that lying helps them to avoid whatever penalty they might have to face had they told the truth.

It isn't until later in childhood development that we can grasp things like telling the truth will be more beneficial in the end because the brain is still in the early stages of the here and now. We can't project yet. You can't reason with a toddler (age 2/3) and introduce the scope of 'you'll be better off if you tell the truth now, rather than lie.' There's another couple of years before the brain can understand that.

Dishonesty is almost always connected to the attempt to avoid negative consequences. This is why aversion therapy has been successful in some adults. When the negative consequences become greater for the lie than for telling the truth, we can learn to change our patterns. One form of this is studies that have been done having patients who are pathological liars to go back and tell the truth in every instance where they have been less than honest. The adult brain learns to grasp the concepts that the toddler brain could not and a new behavior has been formed.

_____________________________

The crowned Diva of Destruction. ~ ExT

Beach Ball Sized Lady Nuts. ~ TWD

Happily dating a new submissive. It's official. I've named him engie.

Please do not send me email here. Unless I know you, I will delete the email unread

(in reply to Spiritedsub2)

Post #: 16

RE: So you are a Master! - 11/1/2013 8:11:22 PM

KnightofMists

Posts: 7149
Joined: 7/29/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyPact

quote:

ORIGINAL: Spiritedsub2
Honest people don't need to be taught how to be honest.

Actually, they do. To be more precise, they have to be untaught the practice of dishonesty.

Fascinating stuff, really. It's related to early childhood development. Somewhere around the age of 2/3 we become cognizant of actions/consequences, and ways that we can manipulate the outcome. I'm no expert, of course, but it goes something like this.......

Toddler takes the forbidden cookie. Adult comes along, asks the toddler if they took the cookie. In the beginning of this development phase, the toddler will answer in the affirmative. The toddler then experiences the negative result.

Later in the phase, the toddler takes the forbidden cookie. Adult comes along, asks the toddler if they took the cookie. The toddler doesn't really have a fully formed sense of right and wrong, so rather than preventing the action that causes the negative outcome, they learn to manipulate the situation. If telling the adult "no" reduces or eliminates the negative consequences, congratulations! The child has now learned that lying helps them to avoid whatever penalty they might have to face had they told the truth.

It isn't until later in childhood development that we can grasp things like telling the truth will be more beneficial in the end because the brain is still in the early stages of the here and now. We can't project yet. You can't reason with a toddler (age 2/3) and introduce the scope of 'you'll be better off if you tell the truth now, rather than lie.' There's another couple of years before the brain can understand that.

Dishonesty is almost always connected to the attempt to avoid negative consequences. This is why aversion therapy has been successful in some adults. When the negative consequences become greater for the lie than for telling the truth, we can learn to change our patterns. One form of this is studies that have been done having patients who are pathological liars to go back and tell the truth in every instance where they have been less than honest. The adult brain learns to grasp the concepts that the toddler brain could not and a new behavior has been formed.

Lol.... God this whole cookie example reminded me of my eldest daughter when she was that toddler age. Mom was out doing stuff and little daughter hanging with Dad. The sweetheart asks if she could have a cookie. Responsible Dad says yes you can go get one! Mom comes home much later and asks what is with the empty cookie bag to Dad. Mmmmmmmm. Daughter! I thought I told you could only have One cookie! Daddy I had one! And then one and then one and then...... Dad learned children are quick to find loopholes in instructions!! And had no cookies for his milk :(

< Message edited by KnightofMists -- 11/1/2013 8:12:25 PM >

_____________________________

Knight of Mists

An Optimal relationship is achieved when the individuals do what is best for themselves and their relationship.

(in reply to LadyPact)

Post #: 17

RE: So you are a Master! - 11/1/2013 10:06:44 PM

DesFIP

Posts: 25191
Joined: 11/25/2007
From: Apple County NY
Status: offline

I guess where we're disagreeing is that you believe this clueless types already know the buzzwords.
I don't and spiritedsub doesn't. As sub women, we get guys coming on and asking us to fix their profiles so they can get a woman. You would be surprised how many don't know the buzzwords. They don't know that having only dick pics are not the thing to do. And they argue with us when told their profiles suck. If they do change it so they say all the right things, while still believing all the wrong ones, we fear that we are then going to be partly responsible when some woman comes on and tells us what the clueless idiot did to her.

And that fear of helping to create a bad outcome is why we don't believe spoonfeeding them on the net is a good thing.

_____________________________

Slave to laundry

Cynical and proud of it!

(in reply to KnightofMists)

Post #: 18

RE: So you are a Master! - 11/2/2013 9:37:11 AM

OsideGirl

Posts: 14441
Joined: 7/1/2005
From: United States
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: KnightofMists
Let's give some new people some help that they sort of should have a handle on.... BEFORE they strut along singing they are a Master! With there slave in tow of course.

For me, if someone comes strutting along saying they're a Master, they should know their slave well enough that they know what tasks, punishments and play they like or be able to have a conversation to find out.

To me M/s is a HUGE commitment. You've agreed that you will have complete responsibility for that person. To come here and ask the equivalent of "what should I get my wife for her birthday" to a group of strangers, is essentially a fail to me. It means that you jumped in before you should have. You made a HUGE to commitment to someone you don't know. Which in most cases means poor decision making.

_____________________________

Give a girl the right shoes and she will conquer the world. ~ Marilyn Monroe

The Accelerated Velocity of Terminological Inexactitude

(in reply to KnightofMists)

Post #: 19

RE: So you are a Master! - 11/2/2013 8:08:21 PM

FrankAr

Posts: 817
Joined: 10/1/2005
Status: offline

Greetings,

Maybe I am old fashioned but by my standards the Master has to be able to have enough money coming in to survive for two people. If you can't survive on your own wage for two people then do not fucken get a slave. I mean if the Master has the slave working and then the money goes into a different account and they use this for rainy days...like a holiday once a year or the account is for her back up in case he dies, then that is logical.

If the Master gets a slave so that he gets ahead in life then he is fucken nuts. The Master should get a slave as a bonus to compliment his life, not as a bonus money windfall. He should be able to guide the slave by his way of life, as a beacon of maturity. Some of the topics that have been discussed on the boards by new Masters, I really think they go into it with their dicks and they think it is a money windfall, how fucken stupid are they.

I wonder if the society is going down a path that it is easier to go online and get answers then to read a book and go online and spend hours of sifting through pages on the net for some inspiration. A Master that would take the effort would be a magnet for slaves, because then they can understand that the Master does have the time and inclination of maturity and knowledge behind them to become their slave.

Just my two cents worth. Be well.

Frank Ar.

_____________________________

I am just me, simple ol me.

Even the softest whisper can be heard in the loudest group....Frank H.

(in reply to KnightofMists)

Post #: 20

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