RE: Sex between Dommes & subs

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RE: Sex between Dommes & subs - 5/11/2007 7:56:25 PM

BoiJen

Posts: 2608
Joined: 3/7/2007
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Do what feels ight is the general consences. For me the whole of my D/s relationship isn't based on sex. Sex and Sm play are rewards for my efforst and service. I also get many other rewards or my service. a pet doing something I want to do on a night out...these things are a sign that I'm doing what's right. And if I wasn't doing good I wouldn't have these things. That's always been clear to me as a servant. If sex is part of your dynamic then have fun indulge how ever you want. Understand that no servant wants to disappoint or anger a dominant. It happens sometimes but that's not what we're after. We're after having fun and pleasing the dominants we serve. So yeah...make it work for you not the other way around.

(in reply to Aimtoplease101)

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RE: Sex between Dommes & subs - 5/11/2007 9:19:18 PM

Wickad

Posts: 428
Joined: 3/12/2005
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(fast reply)

Well, you seem to be getting a number of replies that think sex with a sub is a good thing.

I, for myself, disagree.

I have found that men end up trying to take advantage of their Dominants once you have had sex. They seem to expect that once you've had sex that they don't have to be as service orientated or as obedient. This change in the submissive is usually almost imperceptible - a small lag in responding to commands, a look of defiance before doing something unpleasant, etc. The idea that we are suddenly much more on the same level as equals.

This is just my opinion and, as this thread indicates, it is in the minority.

I wish you well in the development of your D/s dynamic no matter what it ends up looking like and suggest you follow your heart in this matter. If you feel it will work to have sex with your boy then by all means don't let any nay-sayer, such as myself, stop you. If you have some doubts, you might want to wait and see how the relationship develops before taking that step.

Wickad

(in reply to BoiJen)

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RE: Sex between Dommes & subs - 5/11/2007 9:24:26 PM

MzMia

Posts: 5333
Joined: 7/30/2004
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Thanks Wickad, you certainly have made some valid points.
I love these discussions.

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Namaste'
To Each His/Her Own
"DENIAL ain't just a river in Egypt." Mark Twain

What's your favorite fetish?
"My partner's whisper"--bloomswell

(in reply to Wickad)

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Post #: 23

RE: Sex between Dommes & subs - 5/11/2007 9:24:53 PM

DiurnalVampire

Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
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I have had good relationships both with and witout the sex part of it. The only downside I have ever had to a sexual submissive is that they think they are more important to you than they are. They lose sight (sometimes) of being a slave, and think they should get liberties. Sex can be enjoyable, but they have to remember that it is just another asopect of their service and doesnt necessarily mean they are going to be afforded perks for it.

DV

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VampiresLair

(in reply to Aimtoplease101)

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RE: Sex between Dommes & subs - 5/11/2007 9:25:28 PM

MzMia

Posts: 5333
Joined: 7/30/2004
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BoiJen, welcome to CM.
I am enjoying reading your posts and
I think you are a hottie.

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Namaste'
To Each His/Her Own
"DENIAL ain't just a river in Egypt." Mark Twain

What's your favorite fetish?
"My partner's whisper"--bloomswell

(in reply to BoiJen)

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Post #: 25

RE: Sex between Dommes & subs - 5/11/2007 9:41:35 PM

Majik

Posts: 358
Joined: 4/24/2005
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For me I am a VERY sexual person and my 'play' with my sub is usually sexually charged. So If I want sex...I get sex...and that is usually all the time. Doesn't mean it has to be penetration but some sort of sexual release is usually in order for me. He belongs to ME...I will do with him what I want.=]

(in reply to MzMia)

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RE: Sex between Dommes & subs - 5/12/2007 7:29:14 AM

BoiJen

Posts: 2608
Joined: 3/7/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: MzMia

BoiJen, welcome to CM.
I am enjoying reading your posts and
I think you are a hottie.

Okay and thank you. I wish CM would let me post my after-[arty pics. I've got some excellent marks. Anyways my point in all of this is that sex in play depends all where the Tops head is and where the bottom's head is. It's all about communicating that this is a reward for good behaviour. I've never seen a domme who LIKES to punish their servants. Because for the most part that means not playing with them and doing the things they enjoy as well as what the servant enjoys. It's the possitive reinforcement modle. I find it works well. Also, exercises in humility are great. Not embrasement but humility. Knowing one's place. After all...that's part of why we do what we do, correct?

(in reply to MzMia)

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Post #: 27

RE: Sex between Dommes & subs - 5/12/2007 8:13:47 AM

TexasMaam

Posts: 1467
Joined: 6/22/2005
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Bind him in a body harness, blindfold or hood him, have him stand at the foot of the bed with his feet slightly apart, his erection bouncing above the mattress...

Then back up on his cock and tell him to keep his hands behind his back and not move until you're finished...

Oh Yeah Baby I want intercourse with My sub!

TexasMaam

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RE: Sex between Dommes & subs - 5/12/2007 8:23:03 AM

TexasMaam

Posts: 1467
Joined: 6/22/2005
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OK on a more serious note: Intercourse with a sub is the ultimate, but only if I can control the sexual interaction.

Example: There is a huge difference between a Female Domme backing up on a bound and tied submissive's aroused cock, using him for pleasure and the exact same scenario with the opposite perspective of a kneeling submissive female being 'fucked' by a dominant male standing behind her, using her.

Using the sub as a sex toy, hearing him beg for permission to cum, feeling his release, is what makes Me tick. It is intimate, cherished, sexual interaction, but I control it, not the other way around.

TM

< Message edited by TexasMaam -- 5/12/2007 8:24:24 AM >

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