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Enyo -> RE: Is anyone just a "regular" person? (5/12/2007 10:13:14 AM)
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During college I was lucky enough to find (and eventually fall in love with) a Domme who dragged me kicking and screaming into the lifestyle as a submissive. I'd always been naturally dominant in life, with friends, co-workers and with my lovers and it didn't take long for me to figure out that I had a much better time being the Domme. It didn't take long for me to embrace it, I had plenty of time and resources and I started taking classes and trying to learn as much as possible....because I didn't want to hurt anyone, because I didn't know how to tie knots, because I love to learn new things. When I finally got into a relationship with my own submissive, we really talked and I listened to his ideas and fantasies...and then it was back to the books...not all of his kinks were things I would have considered but as I learned more...and started to practice many of them my limits evolved. As time went on I was also exposed to other Doms and subs, all with their own unique kinks, I asked a lot of questions...learned as much as I could about the ones that interested me and put my own spin on them to involve them in my relationship(s). Just because I consider myself an expert in some areas doesn't mean I can't learn anything new, it also doesn't mean that I've had hundreds of subs that I've practiced on, it does mean that I feel I can execute scenes (or parts of scenes) containing those elements flawlessly...
I guess what I want to say is, just because someone is younger doesn't necessarily mean that they are inexperienced, if you have questions, then ask them...there might be a logical explanation. If you are considering a relationship but doubtful, also consider asking them to prove their experience. I'd love to tie someone up fully clothed (and have done it before) just to prove that I can...and that they won't be able to get out. Of course caning and flogging is a little harder to prove and can cause more damage...so my advice is to learn as much as you can and then ask questions until you feel comfortable they know what they are talking about or leave and keep looking or if you are definitely interested suggest maybe going to a class together or getting a Dom that you know is experienced to run a training or refresher course.
Hell, if you are talking to someone from your local scene ask for references, someone probably knows them and can tell you the rumors or has seen them at a party and can tell you if it was a positive or negative experience.
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