Meeting a Dom for the first time (Full Version)

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Submissive



Message

fer0l -> Meeting a Dom for the first time (5/13/2007 10:47:32 PM)

Hi all

I have been on collarme for only a number of weeks and have met a couple of Doms in real life.  The thing is, the ones I have met want sex or blow jobs etc.  As a submissive I feel obliged to do it, and even tho I enjoy it at the time, I wonder if this is considered 'the norm'.  Anyone else had similar experiences? 



MagiksSlave -> RE: Meeting a Dom for the first time (5/13/2007 10:56:09 PM)

Erm.... I dont know but all I know is Im not willing to get sexual with a man that isnt yet my Master or at least not someone that I have been with for a while and we are considering a collar. beeing a sub does not obligate you to service every single person that claims to be a Dom or who asks you to.

Magik's slave



MistressDennice -> RE: Meeting a Dom for the first time (5/13/2007 10:58:24 PM)

No!

Negotiation seems to be completely missing --- a first meeting is about checking out one another not submitting.

"Dom" = another horny male looking to get off with whomever they can dupe into meeting them, not about lifestyle choices, negotiation and consensuality.

What about sexual history, STDs, Hep, HIV/AIDS, HPV (invisible to the human eye -- can anyone say.. possiblity of mutating to cancer of penis, scrotum and more likely for a female cervical), Herpes (can travel across a condom even if there are no lesions visible) and a host of other communicable diseases (for both parties)????



spanklette -> RE: Meeting a Dom for the first time (5/13/2007 11:01:34 PM)

Depends on what kind of dynamic you're looking for. If you're looking for something nothing more serious than casual blowjobs and sex, then you've found what you seek.
 
There's nothing wrong with that...if you're looking for something more serious, then I wouldn't be choosing that particular method.
 
BTW, as a submissive person, you are not obliged to do anything that you don't feel comfortable doing. Please don't confuse being submissive with being taken advantage of.



fer0l -> RE: Meeting a Dom for the first time (5/13/2007 11:07:51 PM)

ugh.. so gullible!!  I had one Dom tell me that it shows that you are submissive... so its a good thing (?)

I always use protection  =)



fer0l -> RE: Meeting a Dom for the first time (5/13/2007 11:16:37 PM)

I am looking for something more, but I think some Doms confuse being submissive with being a slave.. or slut even  ;P
I have said several times to one particular Dom, that I dont just do things because a Dom tells me to.  You have to be worthy of my submission.



FelinePersuasion -> RE: Meeting a Dom for the first time (5/13/2007 11:17:49 PM)

You can still get diseases and get pregnant even if you "use protection"



fer0l -> RE: Meeting a Dom for the first time (5/13/2007 11:21:05 PM)

I didnt sleep with them, I was just using that as an example



earthycouple -> RE: Meeting a Dom for the first time (5/13/2007 11:24:33 PM)

um...missing the point, methinks....

is this typical and normal?  NOOOOO.  Dominants, whether male or female should never expect something like that on a "meet and greet" to prove submissiveness.  Dominants should earn their positions not demand them.



fer0l -> RE: Meeting a Dom for the first time (5/13/2007 11:30:34 PM)

Yes this is what I thought too, but then to be told that it shows your willingness to submit??




FelinePersuasion -> RE: Meeting a Dom for the first time (5/13/2007 11:35:50 PM)

I'd tell them they were full of it and to go pick up some drunk from a bar that'd buy their bullshit lol.



GrizzlyBear -> RE: Meeting a Dom for the first time (5/13/2007 11:36:38 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: fer0l
Yes this is what I thought too, but then to be told that it shows your willingness to submit??


It shows your willingness to submit anybody.  Is that what you want to show?  Aren't you really wanting to be more selective than that?



NakedGirlScout -> RE: Meeting a Dom for the first time (5/13/2007 11:44:22 PM)

It shows your willingness to give blowjobs on a first meeting. Submission has little or nothing to do with casual sex.



fer0l -> RE: Meeting a Dom for the first time (5/13/2007 11:49:07 PM)

I am selective, I wanted the Dom I was with



fer0l -> RE: Meeting a Dom for the first time (5/14/2007 2:16:29 AM)

My question was simply asking if any other subs had come across this behaviour with Doms - this has nothing to do with casual sex.



m0rgan -> RE: Meeting a Dom for the first time (5/14/2007 2:40:20 AM)

i am probably in favour of "drive by blow-jobs", but then my opinion may not be valid.
if you like sucking strangers cocks, maybe you should just crouch in toilets?
you can meet me, if you like, but i might not kiss you hello!



Daddysjezzy -> RE: Meeting a Dom for the first time (5/14/2007 3:00:41 AM)

I have been both a submissive and a slave and I am a slut for my Dominant both by nature and inclination.  I can tell you that giving out blowjobs to any self proclaimed Dominant doesnt make you more of a submissive.  It means you are willing to give guys you are trying to attract blowjobs.  Your situation is no different from high school boys trying to coerce girls into giving them blowjobs by saying "if you love me you will do this for me".   As someone else said if you are happy giving these guys blowjobs then go for it.

jezzy



Marcus440 -> RE: Meeting a Dom for the first time (5/14/2007 3:12:25 AM)

Yes!  I simply cannot believe that no one else in this forum can tell this person the truth.  Yes!  It is normal and it is classified as normal simply because it happens all the time.  A bar?  A toilet?  A chat room?  An online dating service for people who are into, Oh..... lets say "kinky" encounters?  You'd really be hard pressed to define a difference, beyond the length of the conversation  (ie. "bullshit" ) that you get from the people you might encounter. 



givemyall -> RE: Meeting a Dom for the first time (5/14/2007 3:15:32 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: fer0l

My question was simply asking if any other subs had come across this behaviour with Doms - this has nothing to do with casual sex.


In answer to your question, yes I have come across people with this attitude, a couple of times I thought sod it and had some fun because I felt like it.  I think its the same in all walks of life, you can meet a nice person who wants to get to know you and understand you in depth before making any sexual advance and then you get the ones that want to taste the goods asap.. its just learning to judge them and play them at their own game whilst not getting hurt along the way.

Good luck



bandit25 -> RE: Meeting a Dom for the first time (5/14/2007 3:20:55 AM)

You're right Marcus, it does happen all the time.  There are a LOT of people parading as doms who just want sex.  Doesn't mean a damn thing.  It's up to the OP if she wants to do it or not.



Page: [1] 2 3   next >   >>

Valid CSS!




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy
4.882813E-02