RE: Fine Dining vs. Amateur Diners

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SDFemDom4cuck -> RE: Fine Dining vs. Amateur Diners (5/15/2007 12:57:11 AM)
quote: Sdfem, wow, you really earn your money! Eighty services in an eight hour shift? It actually wasn't that bad considering I had two large parties of 20 (at separate times) that night. I happen to enjoy large parties. I'm efficient and organized so that helps a great deal. quote: Who are the best tippers as a group? Older people, young people, men, women? There's really no answer to that. My um is young and he's a great tipper, but then he grew up with a mom waiting tables as a second job for most of his life and a grandmother on his father's side that did as well. He's taught many of his friends the advantages of tipping well. Some college kids and highschool kids are great tippers but I know it's hard for them to afford and frankly, if they leave me anything at all, I'm happy. We're in prom season here and get alot of high school kids. I've been known to follow them out and return their tip with a hint to send the girl some flowers the next day with it instead. Doesn't change how I serve them in any way, but I'm always overly appreciative when a kid on a tight budget trying to take his girl on a special date leaves something. Even if it is the proverbial puddle of change. I've had older people that tip great, and some that don't, regardless of the service provided. It's an individual thing. I have friends, that know I'm waiting tables to get through school, who argue that they don't think tipping is necessary. That it's my job and I shouldn't be paid extra to do it. Of course, I point out the fat bonus they just got for completion of project and explain that it's no different than a tip. Reward for service well done. If it's a couple, I focus on the woman more so than the man, I don't ignore him, but my attention will tend to focus more on the female of the couple. More likely than not, at the end of the evening if she likes me, the tip will be better. We pre-bus our own tables as the courses come. At the end of the dining experience the only thing that should be left on the table for the bussers to handle is glassware. quote: I have a saying that I made up and that I like; "You have to take care of the people who take care of you." Great saying...it works both ways as well. With that I'm off to bed. Homework is finally finished and I have class in a few hours. Ugh.

Vendaval -> RE: Fine Dining vs. Amateur Diners (5/15/2007 1:08:38 AM)
General reply - This is a great topic and one that needs to be discussed more often. I worked in restaurants both as a server and as a hostess. As a customer, I am polite and leave a tip of 10-20% depending on the type of establishment and the quality of the service. Only a few times have I ever sent food back to the kitchen, as when the friend zucchini were char-broiled briquets! lol I pay close attention to how an individual treats those who wait or serve them. If someone is rude and antagonistic to a server, bar-tender, cab driver, etc. I loose a lot of respect for them. And on the few occasions when I have received poor service, then I have reported it to the management. And small children running loose in a crowded restaurant are not just an annoyance; their behavior endangers themselves and everyone else. I have seen a 4 - 5 year old slip out under the table and run down the hall, directly in front of the doors to the kitchen. (These doors had small windows that provided a limited view at head level, with no visibility of the floor level.) One of the waiters was coming out with a tray full of food and hit the door and the kid was smacked hard in the head. The parents were fortunate that was the worst that happened. Ms. Sonnet and Ms. Jo, rest up after the big weekend and do something special for yourselves with some of that hard-earned tip money. (spelling edit)

Wildnfreehrt2004 -> RE: Fine Dining vs. Amateur Diners (5/15/2007 1:20:57 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: hisannabelle greetings, thanks for this thread :) i work at a fast food restaurant, and i've never been a waitress, but because i go out to eat alone often, i do try to be a good customer. i'll rarely complain about food and i usually tip at least 30%, sometimes 50%. i do have one problem, though: because i eat alone, i often get unfriendly and/or unattentive wait staff. i'm used to it at this point, but if i'm going to be paying $20-$25 for a meal and then tipping you $8-$12, it would be really, really, really nice if you'd pay attention when i say that my hamburger is literally raw all the way through (as in, bleeding out). i realize you didn't cook it, but, um, i have a thing about raw, or even medium rare, meat, and i come to your restaurant at least once every couple of weeks and this totally makes me nauseous. so you could at least pay attention long enough to take it back to the kitchen. okay /rant :P but yeah, i usually try to be nice. i've even paid for rather expensive meals when the food was so bad i literally didn't eat it. i'm kind of a doormat when it comes to dining at restaurants. but i do appreciate all the waiters out there :) annabelle. Hear, hear! When I take out my daughter or daughter and mother, we get looked at like we're going to be bad tippers. After getting terrible service several times, I am making a policy of making it known that I tip 15% for mediocre service, 20% for good service and more for great service. I used to wait tables, serve drinks, bartend and QC/audit restaurants. I also pay attention to how my date tips, if they tip less than I do consistently - they're gone. I had one very fun date at Alfred's in SF, Alfred stopped at our table and my date had pulled a one dollar bill out of his wallet and set it near the wall on the table. He told Alfred (thinking he was our waiter) that here was his tip if the service was good. We had the best service because we had everyone rolling in laughter and he tipped very well. Wildy

cjenny -> RE: Fine Dining vs. Amateur Diners (5/15/2007 4:35:41 AM)
General reply. I automatically begin with a 20% tip, then depending on service it either stays there or gets shaved accordingly. It has to be pretty bad for me to take off some of the tip. I tip for service not food, they aren't the ones that cook it. Question: Why oh why, oh why do some servers sit down with me? Not just sit down, but if I'm in a booth they sit right up against me. Big yuck for me, they aren't my dining companion or my best friend. It makes me uncomfortable. That isn't something that causes tip reduction but it does bug me. Question: Is it ever appropriate to tip the chef? Especially if it was a splendid meal, sometimes I pass a compliment but who knows if it reaches them. So can I tip them? If yes... how do I?

farglebargle -> RE: Fine Dining vs. Amateur Diners (5/15/2007 4:53:51 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: bigskycountry As an avid new york city diner, I am around servers quite a bit. My father owned and was head chef at an upscale restaurant in a resort town in montana when i was gowing up and my mother was one of the servers. He has imparted quite a bit of knowledge about food quality and what to expect when you ask for a certain item. My mother has let me know why certain things may happen and what to look for in order to find out what to say to the manager when things are unsatisfactory. I also alternated for 2 years as soundguy at both a comedy club and a jazz/dinner club. Got the "fly-on-the-wall" experience, heard it coming in both ears from both sides of the counter. First off, I will list my largest and most pervasive gripe about dining out: steak preperation. I know what blood-rare is and i know what rare is. I also know what my favorite looks like: pittsburgh blue/black and blue. Do not say "ok" and proceed to allow the chef to nod and prepare me a steak that is merely rare, it insults both of you. Your chef should know whether or not the grill the establishment furnished him is capapble (has enough btu output) to prepare this kind of steak properly. I will digress for a moment and say that I never expect or ask for this prep outside of any place that has more than four steak cuts offered and has the term "dry-aged" or better on their menu (I also sneek a peek at another diner's steak to check the fat coloration to see if I'm eating grass or grain fed beef, which speaks to integrity). The chef may know what it is and how to make it, but that does not mean it is possible to make with the gear in the kitchen. I will likely enjoy it, quite a bit too, but that is why I left an 18% tip and am writing out a quick note to the manager (I find seeking them out and having a conversation with them boorish and such actions would be an offense to my present company). Damn, now I need to take a ride to Argentina...

mistoferin -> RE: Fine Dining vs. Amateur Diners (5/15/2007 5:02:54 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: cjenny Question: Is it ever appropriate to tip the chef? Especially if it was a splendid meal, sometimes I pass a compliment but who knows if it reaches them. So can I tip them? If yes... how do I? I have my own catering business and I also cook and manage a restaurant kitchen. I try to take time when I have it to touch base with customers. Some restaurants here have a policy where tips are pooled and a percentage of the total automatically goes to the kitchen. The remaining tips are then split between the servers and bartenders. I am really not fond of the practice but it rather depends upon the establishment. If the restaurant is paying their servers an actual wage that is at the same level as the kitchen staff then yes, I believe that they should share their tips with those who have prepared the food and cleaned up the mess....after all the food is the main reason people come to the restaurant. If though, the servers are being paid $2 an hour and the folks in the kitchen are making $10 to $25....then no, I think that the servers should be allowed to keep all of their tips. I have had people who have come to the kitchen door (even come right into the kitchen) or summoned me to the table to give me a compliment or a tip. While I appreciate that they want to make such a gesture, it really isn't a good idea to come to the kitchen. The kitchen is a very busy place and really isn't a place for customers for obvious safety and hygienic reasons. Servers are usually very good about passing along compliments.

Level -> RE: Fine Dining vs. Amateur Diners (5/15/2007 5:35:10 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: spankmepink11 Thank You Ladies, i agree. SCFemDom....great points...and very true... I agree too. Interesting thread, MSM.

MsSonnetMarwood -> RE: Fine Dining vs. Amateur Diners (5/15/2007 5:36:12 AM)
quote: Is it ever appropriate to tip the chef? Especially if it was a splendid meal, sometimes I pass a compliment but who knows if it reaches them. So can I tip them? If yes... how do I? I wouldn't say it's inappropriate, but in my 10+ years working in restaurants, I've never had anyone offer a tip to the chef. I do make sure that I go back to the kitchen with compliments, because you KNOW I'm headed back there if there's a complaint about the food LOL. We actually have a great kitchen staff, and they're well paid because they're worth it. What you may not know - the exec chef is NOT the one grilling your steak. Typically they will create the dishes, do the ordering, and do a lot of prep work, but most likely it's a line cook of minority heritage without any kind of formal culinary training and probably worked his way up from being a dishwasher that's actually going to be cooking your dinner, and doing a great job at that.

DomKen -> RE: Fine Dining vs. Amateur Diners (5/15/2007 6:37:20 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: MsSonnetMarwood What you may not know - the exec chef is NOT the one grilling your steak. Typically they will create the dishes, do the ordering, and do a lot of prep work, but most likely it's a line cook of minority heritage without any kind of formal culinary training and probably worked his way up from being a dishwasher that's actually going to be cooking your dinner, and doing a great job at that. When I was working back of the house I was amongst the last of the native english speakers working as a line cook. The executive chef and sous chef were also but all the other line and prep cooks were, legal, immigrants. The money was pretty good but the hours were awful and the working conditions weren't the best. From what I hear the chain casual dining places are pretty much all hispanic in back now. Which really blows me away. Are there no high school kids willing to work in a restaurant anymore? BTW don't bother tipping a chef. They make a good wage and the odd couple of bucks isn't going to mean much to them. Do ask your server to compliment the kitchen if you enjoyed the food. It does help balance out all the complaints a kitchen hears every night. To the guy upthread with a specific way he wants his steak, from the description it sounds like you want the steak seared hard but still very rare. On a flat griddle that is virtually impossible. Over an actual live flame grill it is going to be tricky you need to know the hot spots and need to spend a lot of time on that single steak. If the restaurant seers their steaks on the stove top and finishes them in the oven it should be possible to get what you want if the line cook handling the order knows what he is doing, although don't order this when the menu calls for a pan sauce. The pan the steak was in will likely be too hot to not burn the sauce and the kitchen really can't keep your steak sitting around till the pan cools enough. As to the best tippers I found that men with dates were usually good, they didn't want to appear cheap, while groups of men that were clearly not on a business dinner could be counted on to leave virtually no tip. Worst place I worked was one where the gratuity, 15%, went on the check automatically. Virtually no one ever tipped more and lots of people complained about being "forced" to tip.

LuckyAlbatross -> RE: Fine Dining vs. Amateur Diners (5/15/2007 7:28:09 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SDFemDom4cuck We pre-bus our own tables as the courses come. At the end of the dining experience the only thing that should be left on the table for the bussers to handle is glassware. Actually this is something I find irksome- unless the server specifically asks if we'd like to have any plates removed, even before moving their hands to grab them, and we say yes, I say hands off. I understand the efficiency of clearing the table in shifts and making for quicker and easier turnover, but for me, dishes for courses are ideally brought and taken away all at once. And I dislike the more frequent trend of taking plates away piecemeal by grabby waiters.

DomKen -> RE: Fine Dining vs. Amateur Diners (5/15/2007 7:42:39 AM)
Pre bussing is a way to cut down on staff, fewer busboys, and a way to make the servers job even more hectic which apparently is considered a good thing by the people who invents these new practices in the restaurant trade. Do you know why it seems to take longer to get water and a bread basket on your table than it used to? Because that used to be something the busboys handled. Fewer busboys due to the servers pre bussing the tables means you wait longer for water and bread.

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