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Anal - 5/11/2005 5:03:25 PM   
littleone35


Posts: 2828
Joined: 2/17/2005
Status: offline 		Recwntly talked about "preparing my ss for being taken by Master" I know it is his to take but i must admit i am a little nervous. I had a very bad experience with this. I told Master and he understands but he is still gonna take it. I trust him totally but i am afraid i will tense up and i heard that make it hurt more. Any suggestions?
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Anal - 5/11/2005 5:06:47 PM   
siamsa24


Posts: 2426
Joined: 2/2/2004
Status: offline 		If he understands then he should try to be an gentle and as slow as possible. My advice is to just relax (I know, easy to say but impossible to do) and breathe. Remember that you are doing this because you want to.
Personally, I still cannot handle anal and we have been trying for almost 2 years. Sometimes it just takes trying and re-trying I guess. People have told me that I can do it if I really wanted to, but I disagree. It's more mental then it is physical I think.

(in reply to littleone35)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Anal - 5/11/2005 5:07:41 PM   
BeautifulDoll


Posts: 107
Joined: 4/14/2005
Status: offline 		I just had this conversation with my Master, but he respects my wishes and will wait until I am ready. Talk to your Master again and express your concerns to him more thouroughly. That is what I would do.

(in reply to littleone35)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Anal - 5/11/2005 5:09:21 PM   
DrkAngl


Posts: 145
Joined: 4/9/2005
Status: offline 		Plenty of lube and foreplay.
If your Master takes things slowly then you should be ok. You might suggest lots of foreplay first. The arousal may help you relax.

A well lubed finger can help dialate the anus just by simple massage and stimulation. Take it slow and communicate with your Master. If he's as careing as he sounds from your post, then he would understand you needing time to relax as well. Just talk to him and perhaps he can help ease your fears. :) He might also have suggestions how to make it easier.

(in reply to littleone35)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Anal - 5/11/2005 5:23:39 PM   
sweetnygirl


Posts: 106
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		Definitely relax & breathe properly & have him use plenty of lube. I had never had anal sex until a few weeks ago, but went from yelling because I was scared & it hurt to begging Sir not to stop because it felt so good. He took his time & let me get used to him being inside me. I'm so happy he took the care he did, he got rid of my fear.

_____________________________

Take time to eat the flowers!

(in reply to DrkAngl)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Anal - 5/11/2005 7:43:09 PM   
Lepidoptera


Posts: 161
Joined: 4/14/2005
Status: offline 		It was never a problem for me, because I enjoy the pain associated with a forceful anal penetration..

But we ALWAYS use lube. I recommend ID Millenium, or other silicon based lubes...

At first, especially if you tense up, it will definitely hurt- but if you can just live through the first minute or so, you WILL loosen up.

Whenever I tried anal with vanilla partners it never worked because I didn't wait long enough. If you can just wait it out a little bit, it will become comfortable for you to wait for him to orgasm : )

(in reply to sweetnygirl)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Anal - 5/11/2005 9:12:36 PM   
EmeraldSlave2


Posts: 3645
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		Lepid wow...do you ever get to MD? Or we could even come to NY! OMG you look amazing and if you like forced anal and pain...

I know, you're probably getting thousands of emails at this point, but thanks for adding a little extra drool to my day.

(in reply to Lepidoptera)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Anal - 5/11/2005 9:51:30 PM   
cellogrrlMK


Posts: 672
Joined: 3/11/2005
Status: offline 		I'm always afraid of making a "mess".... how does everyone deal with that?

(in reply to siamsa24)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Anal - 5/11/2005 9:53:49 PM   
siamsa24


Posts: 2426
Joined: 2/2/2004
Status: offline 		That has always been my biggest worry (besides the size). We solved that by just real quick taking a shower after. He knows it's part of it and doesn't freak out about it.
We talked about enemas, but neither of us is real keen on the idea so we decided to just plan on heading straight to the shower after.

btw, love the new avatar (I hope it is new and I'm not just slow)

(in reply to cellogrrlMK)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Anal - 5/11/2005 10:43:24 PM   
cellogrrlMK


Posts: 672
Joined: 3/11/2005
Status: offline 		My Master doesn't seem to care all that much, I'm the one who is uptight about it...

And no, you're not slow, I just got the avatar today, Master found it for me . Thank you for noticing it, I love it!

cello

(in reply to siamsa24)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Anal - 5/11/2005 10:56:05 PM   
Jacen


Posts: 30
Joined: 9/24/2004
Status: offline 		Enemas, suppositories, laxatavies, and even going to the bathroom right before and using a condom can help

(in reply to cellogrrlMK)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Anal - 5/12/2005 1:43:18 AM   
Tangwystal


Posts: 121
Joined: 8/18/2004
Status: offline 		It's a very pretty avatar.

As to anal. I'm also one that likes it to hurt at first. It's great.

If you don't like the idea of enemas for having a clean encounter then be prepared to sometimes have a bit of a mess. Doesn't always happen tho. The quick trip to the shower after is the best idea.



_____________________________

non mihi, non tibi, sed nobis

Tangwystal

(in reply to cellogrrlMK)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Anal - 5/12/2005 2:11:04 AM   
freakylites


Posts: 2
Joined: 5/9/2005
Status: offline 		There are a few things that you can do to make anal sex more comfortable. I found that buying a small toy and trying it out on my own at first (even the thought of some one else around made me tense) helped me to learn to relax my spincters (which is the secret to anal sex). Butt plugs work wonderfully as well, as they allow you to get used to the sensation while focusing on other activities that bring you pleasure (a great way to build a positive association with anal stimulation). They as well come in a variety of sizes from beginner to who do you think you are kidding. As for mess.... try buying a disposible enema kit and pouring out the chemicals. Regular warm tap water works well. There is no need to hold the water in if you are only concerned about asthetics. And of course lube... there is no such thing as too much lube.

(in reply to Tangwystal)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Anal - 5/12/2005 5:04:16 AM   
suko


Posts: 4
Joined: 4/3/2005
From: Texas, originally
Status: offline 		I agree with freakylites that butt plugs can really help. I found that the initial penetration for sex was the most difficult to get used to until I was able to relax. I always sort of dreaded that part and the sort of gritting my teeth until I finally relaxed a bit. But then I found that by using a butt plug, even a small one, it made the pain and/or discomfort of later penetration disappear. Even leaving it in for only 10 minutes or so was enough to get everything relaxed, and it meant that I could begin to actually enjoy the sex part sooner. I don't know if others have had similar experiences, but they helped me.



_____________________________

The trouble with the rat race is that even if you win, you're still a rat. -- Lily Tomlin

(in reply to littleone35)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Anal - 5/12/2005 5:32:05 AM   
EmeraldSlave2


Posts: 3645
Joined: 1/1/2004
Status: offline 		As far as mess, I've never had it be an issue and it's something I was initially concerned about as well. If it really makes you paranoid, try an enema. That can be a whole new element to the scene.

(in reply to suko)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Anal - 5/12/2005 10:09:59 AM   
subversiveone


Posts: 332
Joined: 4/20/2005
From: Daddy's Lap
Status: offline 		Lots of great suggestions!
Mine would be:
try playing with your fingers and lube, focus on feeling the rim, if you are really experimental try oral rimming (but definitely not for the faint of heart)...
the sensation is going to be centered around the sphincter muscle when you do it.
work up to toys, think about your Master spreading you and being his to fill...he'll be so proud ;)
then when the time has 'cum' so to speak, have some baby wipes beside the area, for quick clean up or tissues for the condom... if you are super-concerned about that try the enemas or at least a bm prior to and some bidet type cleansing the exterior... if he's ever done anal he'll understand! goes w/the territory.
be prepared for the pain...im not going to lie to you...you need to work out a system to say, slow down, slower, ok, little more, back up, wait, hold on, ok again, etc.
If it embarrasses you to just say those things then develop safety words! Or moan like a banshee and pray he speaks that language...
all in all, anal is wonderful to receive and for some a real turn on if you work out the 'kinks' ;)
best wishes
xoxo

_____________________________

[img]http://www.sloganizer.net/en/style4,de-spc-de-spc-dee.png[/img]

(in reply to EmeraldSlave2)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Anal - 5/12/2005 10:16:27 AM   
mnottertail


Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline 		This is directed in general, I just am too lazy to seek out the OP again. All these are very good ideas.........one additional thing before the lube would be oragel or like brand (depending on the brand it either contains oil of cloves or a benzocaine) and will numb the muscle some which will help with that.

Sincerely,
Ron

(in reply to subversiveone)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Anal - 5/12/2005 10:46:00 AM   
cellogrrlMK


Posts: 672
Joined: 3/11/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: EmeraldSlave2

As far as mess, I've never had it be an issue and it's something I was initially concerned about as well. If it really makes you paranoid, try an enema. That can be a whole new element to the scene.


Emerald, we've done enemas a couple times in the past just to help me go, not as a precurser to anal sex (I'd never had an enema before!). I can't believe I'm talking about this, but I have regular problems with regularity . There are times when I am so stopped up that I am physically uncomfortable. The only kind of enema that helped was Fleet, and the cramps from that put me out of commission for anything else! Warm water was an interesting sensation but didn't do the trick.

I've talked to a doctor about that fact that I simply have trouble taking dumps (I can't BELIEVE I'm talking about this here!) and he has suggested taking fiber. That's my next move, pardon the pun LOL

But on another note, let's say one is doing an enema before the act. Does that really clean out the area? I have no other issues with anal, but the possibility of a mess (which did happen once with someone, who unconsciously made me feel really bad about it) takes any enjoyment I might experience out of the equation.

With great embarrassment,

cello

< Message edited by cellogrrlMK -- 5/12/2005 10:48:04 AM >

(in reply to EmeraldSlave2)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Anal - 5/12/2005 11:37:10 AM   
Mia1978


Posts: 41
Joined: 5/10/2005
Status: offline 		Depending on how open you can be with your master, I would recomend asking permision to to guide him in (controling the angle and rate of penetration), at least for the first couple times. I found that it takes a couple tries to find the right angle, then it's pretty painless (given enough lube) and once the fear is gone it usually goes very well. Definately foreplay helps in this area too whether oral or massage. We've never had a problem with mess so I can't help with that.

Only other thought, until you are used to it maybe he will be willing to not pull-out all the way during his thrusts. Penetration the first few times is the hardest, after that you may find yourself welcoming the full withdrawl for new penetration. (be forwarned though, if he does constantly withdraw and re-penetrate you may find yourself being pumped up with a little air if you catch my drift- LOL!), but maybe that doesn't happen to everyone ?? (some lubes also can cause gas)

If he won't let you guide him, then certainly practice with a dildo (or something) in various positions and speeds of penetration and so on. I found that some positions hurt like hell, but leaning 1" forward/backward or whatever makes a nice difference.

Relaxing always helps (stomach and butt muscles), breathing.... good luck, hope you enjoy!

(in reply to littleone35)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Anal - 5/12/2005 12:11:23 PM   
Lepidoptera


Posts: 161
Joined: 4/14/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Mia1978

Depending on how open you can be with your master, I would recomend asking permision to to guide him in (controling the angle and rate of penetration), at least for the first couple times. I found that it takes a couple tries to find the right angle, then it's pretty painless (given enough lube) and once the fear is gone it usually goes very well. Definately foreplay helps in this area too whether oral or massage. We've never had a problem with mess so I can't help with that.


I've never had problems with angles with more experienced (sexually) Masters- but with younger, more inexperienced men, it can be a bit rough- I've found that if I try to move to let him know where he SHOULD be putting it, he just assumes I'm trying to escape and goes back to what he was doing (wrong) before. So, verbal communication is definitely key.

(in reply to Mia1978)
Profile   Post #: 20
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