quote:

ORIGINAL: stella40

quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressRouge

For a rewarding and successful dynamic, 50/50 exchange, a mixture of both.

I agree with this 100%. I don't think you can be too simplistic and divide people into Dominant and submissive, because when it comes down to it we're just talking about people - individuals - who prefer either the dominant or submissive role in their close personal relationships.

What it all boils down to I guess is such a relationship can only be successful when there's honesty, openness, trust and communication where the needs, wants and desires of each is met by the other and everything becomes mutual.

Someone identifying themselves as submissive and wanting to serve and someone identifying themselves as dominant and wanting to be served to me is a bit of a no brainer - it goes without saying. But just because you identify yourself as a submissive doesn't necessarily mean you are able to serve any Dominant, and vice versa. Good intentions are fine, you may want to serve, or you may wish to be served, but these intentions usually come to nothing unless you're with the right Dominant or the right submissive.

In my opinion in BDSM nobody is entitled to anything, it doesn't matter if you're a Dominant or a submissive, you don't just get yourself into a relationship by being entitled to something. Nice nicks and nice words are fine, but you only get yourself into a successful D/s relationship by backing up your words with actions, inspiring trust and confidence in the other person, and being open and honest about what you really want from the relationship. That is, unless you want a one-sided relationship.  

quote:

I've noted that Dominant types,  on several occasions post that a submissives job is to "make the Dominants life easier".  Is this based on the Dominant being entitled just because they identify as Dominants?  Or is it a direct result of the submissives desire to please?   Is it a combination of both?

quote:

ORIGINAL: spankmepink11

I've noted that Dominant types,  on several occasions post that a submissives job is to "make the Dominants life easier".  Is this based on the Dominant being entitled just because they identify as Dominants?  Or is it a direct result of the submissives desire to please?   Is it a combination of both?

I'm not sure why, but when a "D" type states that the main purpose of a submissive is to make the Dominants life easier,  it kind of rubs me the wrong way.  I don't necessarily think that submission is a "gift" but i also wouldn't like said submission to  be something  thats taken for granted.

I want to be much more to my partner than a tool to make their lives easier, even if my desire to please accomplishes that by default.