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New, old or either? - 5/28/2007 10:44:22 AM

Copulo

Posts: 268
Joined: 5/3/2007
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How many of you would consider taking on a ‘new to the scene’ submissive?
Perhaps you prefer new?
Perhaps you don’t mind either way?
Or perhaps you would much prefer to have someone more experienced?

I would never say never but I prefer not to take on ‘new to the scene’ submissives

Post #: 1

RE: New, old or either? - 5/28/2007 10:51:16 AM

ownedgirlie

Posts: 9184
Joined: 2/5/2006
Status: offline

My Master prefers to take on a submissive who feels an inner pull to him, whether she is new or experienced or somewhere in between.

I had never served "real time" when we met. He has developed me into the slave I always needed to be but could not get to on my own. He has brought in girls who were highly experienced as well. If a girl feels that internal pull and yearning to submit to him, the rest of what he wants of her will follow.

(in reply to Copulo)

Post #: 2

RE: New, old or either? - 5/28/2007 11:34:22 AM

MiladyElaine

Posts: 1086
Joined: 10/10/2004
Status: offline

It depends on attitude and commitment and obedience.

_____________________________

A crazy quilt is warm but oddly put together.

Milady

(in reply to ownedgirlie)

Post #: 3

RE: New, old or either? - 5/28/2007 11:43:15 AM

GoddessKai

Posts: 119
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: Hazel Park, Michigan
Status: offline

I agree with MiladyElaine. It really depends on the attitude, commitment and obedience of the submissive in question. Sometimes I prefer a male that's already been trained in service. Other times, I don't want to have to re-teach and recondition a submissive because of certain behaviors.

(in reply to MiladyElaine)

Post #: 4

RE: New, old or either? - 5/28/2007 12:52:22 PM

thetammyjo

Posts: 6322
Joined: 9/8/2005
Status: offline

Honestly I am most attracted to younger and less experience but with some experience.

Why? Fewer old habits to unlearn especially for someone who has been a slave previously.

Also since I am attracted to younger that does tend toward less experience though not always.

_____________________________

Love, Peace, Hugs, Kisses, Whips & Chains,

TammyJo

Check out my website at http://www.thetammyjo.com Or www.tammyjoeckhart.com

And my LJ where I post fiction in progress if you "friend" me at http://thetammyjo.livejournal.com/

(in reply to Copulo)

Post #: 5

RE: New, old or either? - 5/28/2007 12:57:41 PM

mpnaleksandra2

Posts: 24
Joined: 1/10/2006
Status: offline

As long as there is mutual attraction, desire and understanding, the level of experience is not of much importance

(in reply to thetammyjo)

Post #: 6

RE: New, old or either? - 5/28/2007 1:29:44 PM

EvilGeoff

Posts: 523
Joined: 8/24/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Copulo

How many of you would consider taking on a ‘new to the scene’ submissive?
Perhaps you prefer new?
Perhaps you don’t mind either way?
Or perhaps you would much prefer to have someone more experienced?

I would never say never but I prefer not to take on ‘new to the scene’ submissives

*raises his hand*

I've had a brand new to the scene girl, I've had limited experience girls, I had one who was much, much more experiend in the scene than I was even though I was several years older...

I respond to the person, their heart, their desire, their submission. Their level of experience (or lack of it) is either a tool I can use to my advantage, or a challenge to overcome, for good or ill it is part of the person. I will try to make it work for me, regardless.

YIK,
- Geoff

(in reply to Copulo)

Post #: 7

RE: New, old or either? - 5/28/2007 1:52:03 PM

Calandra

Posts: 725
Joined: 11/22/2004
Status: offline

I hafta go with the crowd here...

cubby was trained very well when I first met him. He was only 21, but he had been diligent in his service to the household before Mine, and he was a joy to behold. The hardest thing to teach him was not to use thirdspeak and to learn to take personal downtime and develop his own interests.

I've also had delightful experience with ones who were totally new and inexperienced though.

The important thing is to find someone who is motivated and sincere.

_____________________________

Lady Kathryn
Athens, Ga.
House of Phoenix

"Nothing is ever final until you're dead - and even then I'm sure God negotiates" Anjelica Huston in Everafter

(in reply to Copulo)

Post #: 8

RE: New, old or either? - 5/28/2007 1:56:34 PM

DiurnalVampire

Posts: 8125
Joined: 1/19/2006
From: Nashville, TN
Status: offline

I prefer the "blank slate". I like being someone's firsts most of the time, and I dont like unteaching previous experience. I also prefer mine young, so it is easier to find the less experienced ones at those ages. The one thing I do not like, however, i someone who think that even without experience that their education makes them "better" than anyone else. REading science books doesnt make you a chemist, so reading BDSM literature and how-tos dontmake you a good slave. They make you a better educated one.

That said, with the right chemistry, I will consider someone with more experience. It all comes down to chemistry and the willingness to learn what I like regardless of what they have been taught before.

DV

_____________________________

I will be your Dominate if you will be my submit - Fox

Snarko Ergo Sum
If you cannot change your mind, how are you so sure you still have one? -proverb

*Owner of Fox - collared 10/13/07*
VampiresLair

(in reply to Calandra)

Post #: 9

RE: New, old or either? - 5/28/2007 1:57:34 PM

Aileen68

Posts: 6091
Joined: 8/2/2005
Status: offline

From a sub point of view.
I've been with very experienced right down to brand new.
Both have their appeal to me.
I think I like new just for the fact that he is going through just as many firsts right along side of me. And it's fun to watch him evolving as he explores this with me.

(in reply to Copulo)

Post #: 10

RE: New, old or either? - 5/28/2007 2:13:11 PM

hereyesruponyou

Posts: 770
Joined: 1/22/2007
Status: offline

Depends on the chemistry, but honestly brand new and has no clue what role they really want to play can be exhausting. Then it depends on how much time i ahve available. When i am busy i don't feel i can give someone new all they need

(in reply to Aileen68)

Post #: 11

RE: New, old or either? - 5/29/2007 2:14:05 AM

Copulo

Posts: 268
Joined: 5/3/2007
Status: offline

Im with hereyesruponyou on this. Not that I haven’t had complete newbies or that I would never consider taking one on.
Chemistry is something that takes time to build and its something that is very rarely instantaneous. I guess I am perhaps a little over cautious when contemplating about a new sub.
When I first came into this I was very specific in my mind about what I wanted. I then started to go to munches, clubs and parties and suddenly my mind was like a whirlwind. There was so much to do and try and I wanted to go on this amazing journey and try all sorts out. In that time what I wanted changed at least half a dozen times. As time went on I started to look more deeply into what it was I actually wanted and I discovered I had come full circle and was right back round at the beginning. I know that I needed to do that journey first before I could settle down.
I have seen this similar pattern with subs, particularly those that go to fet and BDSM clubs, so Im not saying a new sub is not a good sub but I feel a new sub often has some of their own journeying to do
My sub needs to be very much part of who I am and that means being with me when I work the clubs. Im an avid party goer and although we get plenty of time alone, they are also thrown into the full swing of the BDSM social world.
I need to know they have done there exploring and reached a stage of wanting to settle down. Of course some just don’t need to explore and for that reason I would never say never but I have seen too many new subs going from one Mistress/Master to another before blossoming and becoming true to themselves.

(in reply to hereyesruponyou)

Post #: 12

RE: New, old or either? - 5/29/2007 2:31:24 AM

ExSteelAgain

Posts: 1803
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Georgia
Status: offline

At one time in my life, if I intended to make her my slave, I would have demanded a newbie. Knowing she had been Domed by others would have been an obstacle to my ego. With time and maturity, I realize we all have pasts unless we are very young.

I do think there is an excitement when you are the first to spank or flog a woman and space her beautifully, much like the first time a woman is brought to an orgasm. There is power in taking that control of her and knowing she is going to desire you to do it again and again.

< Message edited by ExSteelAgain -- 5/29/2007 2:35:47 AM >

_____________________________

You can paint a cinder block bright pastel pink, but it's still a cinder block. (By Me.)

(in reply to Copulo)

Post #: 13

RE: New, old or either? - 5/29/2007 2:33:49 AM

Einzelganger

Posts: 221
Joined: 4/8/2007
From: Orlando, FL
Status: offline

*laughs* Ok, I have little to add to this thread, but GoddessKai's signature just made me snort pink lemonade out my nose, lol.

However, I should like to think that, if the dom and sub have chemistry, and the submissive is a quick learner, then experience (or lack thereof) shouldn't matter too much, as experience will come with time anyway; of course, as I'm seeking a long term relationship, that's my mind's current orientation. If it isn't a long term relationship, though, I suppose experience has its benefits...

-Einzelgänger

(in reply to GoddessKai)

Post #: 14

RE: New, old or either? - 5/29/2007 2:49:04 AM

TheLegend

Posts: 13
Joined: 4/20/2006
Status: offline

In the main have always had newbies and corrupted them. This is a long slow process however and a lot of patience and understanding is required. However as had been said before if the chemistry and desire to learn are there, the rewards can be amazing.

(in reply to Einzelganger)

Post #: 15

RE: New, old or either? - 5/29/2007 4:13:01 AM

DeviantDiva

Posts: 16
Joined: 11/25/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Aileen68

From a sub point of view.

I've been with very experienced right down to brand new.
Both have their appeal to me.
I think I like new just for the fact that he is going through just as many firsts right along side of me. And it's fun to watch him evolving as he explores this with me.

I really like how you put this.

For me, there is an appeal about evolving and exploring together with someone who genuinely wants to. I also say this because I myself am still fairly new to D/s exchanges and for the last couple of months have had the most amazing opportunity to explore with a beautiful submissve who is as eager to learn and grow as I am. Its quite intoxicating on so many levels.

I do agree with a lot of the discussion so far as well....chemistry, sincerity and mutual respect are so key and probably more so relevant than level of experience.

(in reply to Aileen68)

Post #: 16

RE: New, old or either? - 5/29/2007 4:34:33 AM

sweetnurseBBW

Posts: 2464
Joined: 1/26/2006
From: North Carolina
Status: offline

Everyone was new at one point and everyone needs to learn but also people have their own preferences. I think the individual themselves should be taken into account not the amount of time they have spent on the scene. Thank goodness when I was new someone took the time to give me a chance. That was 12 years ago but I do realize some just prefer not to take on a new person. Whatever works for you.

_____________________________

Sir Pain's pain slut

(in reply to Copulo)

Post #: 17

RE: New, old or either? - 5/29/2007 4:36:42 AM

jaunty1

Posts: 102
Joined: 3/20/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: Copulo

How many of you would consider taking on a ‘new to the scene’ submissive?
Perhaps you prefer new?
Perhaps you don’t mind either way?
Or perhaps you would much prefer to have someone more experienced?

I would never say never but I prefer not to take on ‘new to the scene’ submissives

It matters very little to me. I just would look for someone who wanted to be with me first. If melissa had not been interested in the M/s dynamic, it would not have mattered to me. I would still have married her simply because she is a wonderful and beautiful person; inside and out.

Live well

Alex

_____________________________

(in reply to Copulo)

Post #: 18

RE: New, old or either? - 5/29/2007 5:10:30 AM

canupleaseme

Posts: 775
Joined: 7/9/2006
Status: offline

When I worked in a dungeon I didnt care how much experience they had. When it came to meeting my boy because I was new to the whole significant bdsm relationship thing I was glad that he was inexperienced and new. I was approached by a few boys who were very experienced and I felt uncomfortable thinking I would be corrected or not seen as capable. Looking back know its easy to say it wouldnt of really mattered but I must admit it did at the time

_____________________________

Proud mistress

(in reply to jaunty1)

Post #: 19

RE: New, old or either? - 5/29/2007 5:33:30 AM

Copulo

Posts: 268
Joined: 5/3/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: canupleaseme

When I worked in a dungeon I didnt care how much experience they had. When it came to meeting my boy because I was new to the whole significant bdsm relationship thing I was glad that he was inexperienced and new. I was approached by a few boys who were very experienced and I felt uncomfortable thinking I would be corrected or not seen as capable. Looking back know its easy to say it wouldnt of really mattered but I must admit it did at the time

I can understand this. When I first started to work as a pro Mistress it was under the guided supervision of a very experienced Mistress. I was still however, left on my own during her busy periods.
I can honestly say with hand on heart that I didn’t know what the hell I was doing and I used to beg her to give me the newbies because they had nothing to compare me with!!
People may come back with ‘well it can’t be natural to you then’ and all I can say to that is, I was as nervous as hell. I wanted to get it right and I wanted to learn but I did not have the experience and know how to deal with the many dynamics of being able to dominate and do sadistic things to all these men and especially to men that had been coming back and forth for years.

I don’t prefer old timers to new people because they are trained (geez pre-trained holds absolutely no interest to me) but because, like I have said before, they seem more sure about what they are about and what they want.

I have read what people have posted and it has made me think that perhaps if I was not so much out and about on the scene and was not going to be introducing a sub to this big scene life and giving them a taste of just how wild it is, then I would very probably be able to settle down with a newbie in the comfort of my own home.

(in reply to canupleaseme)

Post #: 20

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