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RE: New, old or either? - 5/29/2007 6:42:04 AM   
CDOM3


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Joined: 2/22/2007
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Well first off, mental and emotional stability. From there, a sub/slave with experience has the plus of the knowledge but can also frankly come with 'baggage' or preconceptions.
A sub/slave with no experience does require a huge investment of time and effort but, for myself, the process and especially the reward of seeing the knowledge put into practice wonderful.
In the end, it is the chemistry.

(in reply to Copulo)
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RE: New, old or either? - 5/29/2007 7:54:59 AM   
canupleaseme


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Its funny isnt it.  When I first started working there I was extremely nervous and I did have a few of the other more exprienced mistresses laugh at my preference to newbies but being dominant is about confidence to me and I guess having newbies allowed me to build on that.  Now when its come to my first proper bondage relationship its a completely different ball game than the dungeon work and I felt right back at the bottom again so having my partner in the same boat was a plus for me becasue its meant we can learn together and I can train him my way.  I imagine its very hard to undo anothers hard work if its not how you want it for yourself.  With my maid I'm glad she has some experience becasue I dont have as much time with er as I do my boy so her having some idea of what I want is certainly helpful and there is less pressure for me but I think its different depending on the type of relationship your in.  If I was to go to a fetish party and spank random people (pre arranged of course) it would make no difference to me if they had been bondaging ten years or ten weeks 

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RE: New, old or either? - 5/29/2007 8:14:36 AM   
Faramir


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I'm only interested in an intimate love relation, in eros, so I don't care about a checklist (size Y tits, X amount of experience, does/doesn't gag when throat fucked, etc).  I can only respond to a person, to her as her, as hopefully she is to me.  When I see a laundry list in a woman's profile, (the "experienced Master" checkbox is the most common), I'm off put, because I hear that person looking for a checklist, not a person.

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True masters, true subs and slaves, X many years in the lifestyle, Old Guard this and High Protocol that--it's like a convention of D&D nerds were allowed to have sex once, and they decided to make a religion out of it.

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RE: New, old or either? - 5/29/2007 9:19:35 AM   
chellekitty


Posts: 3923
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this has been an interesting thread for me to watch as i have gone threw a gamut of emotions...outrage that someone wouldn't want an experienced submissive...exasperation that young must mean inexperienced...sheepish that nearly 6 years ago i would have been outraged that someone didn't want a new submissive or that i might possibly be a lot of work (for the record i was)...amusement that somehow someone out there is gonna read one of these post and say "see, i was right" because your opinion happened to be their opinion...
somewhere out there is a Dominant or a Poly household that wants to take on a bipolar bisexual masochistic addict that has to have a uhaul to relocate her baggage and thats just the emotional stuff...and i am positive of that, so i am not giving up...
also, not that it was asked but i prefer an experienced Dominant cause its a bitch to have to give instruction from the bottom but not top while sceneing, and yes i have done it...that being said...i have been with experienced Doms who couldn't hold a long term relationship together with all the duct tape in the world...so if an inexperienced Dominant is willing to suck up their pride and go ask help from other Dominants and they have relationship skills that exceed highschool level, i am all for it...
chelle
House Infernus (which btw is not a collar...)

(in reply to Faramir)
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RE: New, old or either? - 5/29/2007 9:47:48 AM   
Copulo


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quote:

ORIGINAL: Faramir

I'm only interested in an intimate love relation, in eros, so I don't care about a checklist (size Y tits, X amount of experience, does/doesn't gag when throat fucked, etc).  I can only respond to a person, to her as her, as hopefully she is to me.  When I see a laundry list in a woman's profile, (the "experienced Master" checkbox is the most common), I'm off put, because I hear that person looking for a checklist, not a person.


Oh come on! Im not talking about a checklist here. Im not interested if a sub has had his balls stretched beyond imagination or a female has been fisted successfully, Im talking about where there head is at.

When I first got into this I wanted to dominate someone verbally. I also had a sadistic streak that was very specific. When I got out onto the scene I was all over the place. I wanted to try anything and everything and for a while I forgot what first brought me to this place. To be honest I became so f*cking confused about what I wanted to do or be that I ended up never feeling any emotional attachment to a submissive and at times I even resented them. Where ever I went I left a whole load of debris. Eventually I left the scene for a while because it just confused me.
Years later I was back but this time much more channelled into knowing what I wanted and what I was looking for. I had journeyed forward to reach that eventual goal I needed to reach and that goal was the same one I had right at the very start, (full circle) to be very verbally dominant with very specific pain angles attached. The difference is, I now do that with absolute clarity because I’ve done the rest and got the t-shirt!

I have come to a point in my journey where I am extremely comfortable with who I am and I want to be with a submissive who has reached that stage of being extremely comfortable in who they are and not have to guide them through this whole emotional journey that often takes years.

If a new sub came to me with those qualities already deeply imbedded then I would be ecstatic


(in reply to Faramir)
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RE: New, old or either? - 5/29/2007 1:09:39 PM   
MistressSassy66


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Joined: 11/5/2004
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I like Either...

I think there can be something said for the
new submissives reactions compared to an experienced submissives.

Then again the experienced submissive can handle more sometimes.
And they know what they like...

I'm sticking with Either.

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Mistress Sassy

http://www.mistresssassy.com

In the Immortal Words of Bob....Fuck the dumb shit.

"I love you not only for what you are,But for what I am when I'm with you."- Opening line from a poem by Roy Croft

(in reply to Copulo)
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RE: New, old or either? - 5/29/2007 3:13:27 PM   
MissHarlet


Posts: 2728
Joined: 9/11/2005
From: El Paso , TX US
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I try to remember " we were all new once".  That said, the mindset is what is most attractive to me and I have found it in both new and more experienced as well as lacking in both.

I do however, agree that those that are in the midst of the " newbie frenzies" require a lot of effort and time.  I know I did !!



_____________________________

Protectress of hearts/souls of all submissives calling Bounty's Place home, by order of Bounty~Proprietor

To be respected you must be respectful, to be loved you must be willing to love,
to be trusted you must be willing to trust.

(in reply to MistressSassy66)
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RE: New, old or either? - 5/29/2007 3:26:03 PM   
ExSteelAgain


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Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Georgia
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Yeah, most of us get off on the newbiegasms.

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You can paint a cinder block bright pastel pink, but it's still a cinder block. (By Me.)

(in reply to MissHarlet)
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