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RE: it IS easier to lie online - 6/1/2007 12:34:38 PM   
domiguy


Posts: 12952
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline 		I think it is fun to lie when participating in the forums of CM...Or when sending messages or even when creating your profile....Right now as I am typing this I have just shit my pants.

Anywhoo I think that there are very few misunderstandings that arise in the forums of CM. Whatever happens out here is because someone has taken offense to something someone posted and due to the fact that they are probably clinically insane they proceed to have a meltdown.

I think this is an ideal way to convey a message as well as receive information......A large chunk of crap just fell out of my pants leg.....If people have communicating out here they probably suffer the same fate in their personal relationships.  The people who have been duped have allowed this to happen....Sucks to be them......My dog is now rolling around on the floor in the poo.......I find his site to be pretty damn cool....And it can be used to find tremendous succes an enjoyment if you just use your noggin.....My dog just coughed up someones finger and smells like crap.

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RE: it IS easier to lie online - 6/1/2007 12:39:41 PM   
LadyPact


Posts: 32566
Status: offline 		The finger or the dog?     

< Message edited by LadyPact -- 6/1/2007 12:40:00 PM >

(in reply to domiguy)
Profile   Post #: 42
RE: it IS easier to lie online - 6/1/2007 3:05:25 PM   
ELUSIVE1


Posts: 536
Joined: 9/11/2005
Status: offline
This online community is no different than a huge city...you will have those undesirables that will lie, cheat , steal etc...and you will have those that are brutally honest...I think anyone that says they don't lie, is the biggest liar of all...I admit to telling folks that I really don't care to meet that my calendar is full...small harmless lie,but a lie all the same...if you are developing online relationships in the hope of meeting real time, you won't lie...just food for thought


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Profile   Post #: 43
RE: it IS easier to lie online - 6/1/2007 3:37:48 PM   
MadRabbit


Posts: 3460
Joined: 8/9/2006
Status: offline 		Its also incredibly easy to be honest online then it is in real life.

Everyone focuses on the lieing part, but the Internet also brings a very helpful communication tool.

Just look at the forums...People come here and relate incredibly personal and private stories to complete strangers all the time. If the context was different and this was a face to face group where everyone could see each other, I doubt many people would be quick to start sharing their own intimate, private and embarressing details.

Without the prescense of face to face interaction, the normal issues of shyness, uncomfortableness, embarressment, etc are fealt less.

Of course, at the same time, accountability, courtesy, and politeness go right out the window as well. People say things to each other they wont all the time in a face to face confrontation. Want to know what someone thinks? Ask them. Want to know what they REALLY think? Ask them on the Internet.

Compare your average conversation on sexual desire that you have on the Internet with someone to the average conversation on sexual desire that you have face to face over even over the phone. Personally, I get way better details and information threw a message conversation then in the other two forms of communication.

Once I have established some degree of real time trust with someone, I still prefer to have some conversations over the Net as supposed to face to face. I get more honesty and less resistance due to shyness or embaressment or privacy.

Only positive conversations though. Miscommunication and misunderstanding have quickly turned negative conversations into serious issues that have affected my relationships.

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Profile   Post #: 44
RE: it IS easier to lie online - 6/1/2007 3:43:54 PM   
cjenny


Posts: 1736
Joined: 11/27/2006
Status: offline 		I agree with you MH. It is much easier to expose my underbelly to the internet than it ever is one-on-one, face-to-face. Heck I've posted more about myself online than anyone has or will ever know about me in person.
No one here can see me, and I can't see them. So I can't see the things I fear ie, ridicule or repugnance. I may receive it in text but I don't have to see it in their eyes.
It's okay to be me online.
I'm glad there is an online so that there is somewhere to be me even if it doesn't exist!

Lying makes for too much remembering of details lol. When I mess up details or such it is because of cognitive issues. If I can't remember two months ago, I sure can't remember a crafted personality
(sorry I had a nana urge).

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Profile   Post #: 45
RE: it IS easier to lie online - 6/1/2007 6:34:28 PM   
stella40


Posts: 417
Joined: 1/11/2006
From: London, UK
Status: offline 		Whoa whoa whoa!

Hang on a minute here. People saying it's easier to lie online because you miss out on the body language and inflections? Really?

I don't see much of a difference. Someone you don't know so well can just as easily lie to your face as someone you don't know so well writing you an e-mail. Sure, there are signs such as body language in person, but there are also nuances in the written language as well. This is why we have so much literature, English is one of the greatest literary languages in the world.

I have a big problem with the OP's theory. How so? Well following the logic of the OP, this would mean actors would have problems interpreting Shakespeare or any other classic playwright for that matter. Most actors working with a script never get to meet the author of that script, so how do they manage to perform Hamlet just as well in London as they do in Toronto?

Okay so talent and ability to feel and interpret the language is individual, Tom Hanks cannot play Hamlet like John Malkovich or even Robin Williams, but the written language contains just as many implications, inferences and nuances as the spoken language, if not more.

English is also not a standard language, it's individual. It's not only different in the UK from what it is in the USA or Australia, New Zealand or Canada, but also from city to city, town to town and village to village. Someone in Glasgow uses English far differently from someone in London. So does a native New Yorker from someone in Florida. Your use of English changes with your surroundings, your environment and even the people you associate with. This is why whenever a native English speaker opens their mouth you can usually immediately work out where they come from, whether they've been educated or not, what their possible vocation is and so many other things. Online most people can tell if they're dealing with a male or a female, someone old or someone young. Written English contains just as many clues as spoken English.

You cannot write without thinking - it's impossible. And it's been known since Ancient Greece that written language, like spoken language contains three things - ethos (your own individual character), logos (logic, or logical thinking) and pathos (or emotion). And are you trying to tell me you cannot tell roughly how someone is feeling when they write something to you?

It is generally when someone perceives that it is easier for others to be dishonest and more prone to lying online that they succumb to floccipaucinihilipilification (writing something off as worthless) but I don't believe that it makes a difference whether you're communicating online or face to face - trust takes time to establish and develop.

< Message edited by stella40 -- 6/1/2007 6:40:55 PM >

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Profile   Post #: 46
RE: it IS easier to lie online - 6/1/2007 6:41:30 PM   
dcnovice


Posts: 37282
Joined: 8/2/2006
Status: offline 		People lie online?

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it's never enough to keep up.

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INTELLIGENT LIFE IN THE UNIVERSE

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Profile   Post #: 47
RE: it IS easier to lie online - 6/1/2007 7:09:01 PM   
TemptingNviceSub


Posts: 3054
Joined: 10/1/2005
Status: offline 		People who lie, lie on line ..People who are truthful are truthful on line . Of course your truth may be my lie..often times it is subjective..But let us not forget that many Dominants use the internet as a way for their submissives to journal, a way to open up fully usually without repercussions, to be sometimes brutally honest without worrying to much about seeing his disappointment, or to fear seeing disgust in his eyes or what have you..But to me the really great thing about communication via the internet........................I can wear my white granny panties and no one knows it! ...Tempting

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I have greatly enjoyed the second blooming...suddenly you find at the age of 50, that a whole new life has opened before you.........Agatha Christie.

You must make tracks into the unknown~~Thoreau

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Profile   Post #: 48
RE: it IS easier to lie online - 6/1/2007 7:10:14 PM   
dcnovice


Posts: 37282
Joined: 8/2/2006
Status: offline 		Thanks, Tempting! I actually was kidding.

_____________________________

No matter how cynical you become,
it's never enough to keep up.

JANE WAGNER, THE SEARCH FOR SIGNS OF
INTELLIGENT LIFE IN THE UNIVERSE

(in reply to TemptingNviceSub)
Profile   Post #: 49
RE: it IS easier to lie online - 6/1/2007 7:13:15 PM   
angelic


Posts: 1807
Joined: 1/24/2005
Status: offline 		~fast reply~ lying on line can and will bite you in the ass.  Not only have you lied, you have put it into written word.

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~....and once you have tasted flight, you will walk the earth with your eyes turned skyward, for there you have been and there you long to return.~ -- Leonardo de Vinci


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Profile   Post #: 50
RE: it IS easier to lie online - 6/1/2007 7:27:33 PM   
hereyesruponyou


Posts: 770
Joined: 1/22/2007
Status: offline 		First of all, it was not my hypothesis, but one of other more learned individuals. I asked for opinions of others.

Anyhoo, to say that anyone can lie to your face as well as they do online is silly. Maybe some people can. Perhaps those same actors who interpret Shakepeare or whoever in their own way (ever seen 2 productions the same? and how about the fact they have a Director telling them how to act?) can do this, but i can't. I show all my emotions on my face. It's a huge help as a domme since the sub knows exactly how i am feeling and responds in turn. Online i can say anything and get away with it. I can say things that i think are sarcastic and obviously not to be taken seriously, but have them taken completely seriously by someone else. With tone and inflection this happens much less often. If i IM my daughter and ask her if she wants burgers tonight and she sends back "I don't care", i have no idea how she meant that. Was there a typical teen eye roll and tinge of sarcasm in her voice, was there true disinterest, was there a hint of yum that sounds good or what?

I think the English language is alot of fun. And i prefer books over movies/plays/etc. I like the fact that with a book I do the interpretation, i am not stuck with someone else's idea of what i should see in those words.

(in reply to stella40)
Profile   Post #: 51
RE: it IS easier to lie online - 6/1/2007 7:38:59 PM   
TemptingNviceSub


Posts: 3054
Joined: 10/1/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: dcnovice

Thanks, Tempting! I actually was kidding.
Sorry dc novice..I was actually referring to the OP..big oops....Tempting

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I have greatly enjoyed the second blooming...suddenly you find at the age of 50, that a whole new life has opened before you.........Agatha Christie.

You must make tracks into the unknown~~Thoreau

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Profile   Post #: 52
RE: it IS easier to lie online - 6/1/2007 7:41:47 PM   
hereyesruponyou


Posts: 770
Joined: 1/22/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: TemptingNviceSub
But to me the really great thing about communication via the internet........................I can wear my white granny panties and no one knows it! ...Tempting


Awwww, don't you mean red satin and lace thong with matching garters and such??? After all this is the internet!

(in reply to TemptingNviceSub)
Profile   Post #: 53
RE: it IS easier to lie online - 6/1/2007 8:10:00 PM   
TemptingNviceSub


Posts: 3054
Joined: 10/1/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: hereyesruponyou

quote:

ORIGINAL: TemptingNviceSub
But to me the really great thing about communication via the internet........................I can wear my white granny panties and no one knows it! ...Tempting


Awwww, don't you mean red satin and lace thong with matching garters and such??? After all this is the internet!
.D'oh...well I said you could wear white granny's however..as per usual I am wearing my black little babydoll nightie and matching thong with my hair
in a ponytail.........now...how would you all like to purchase some land with a desert view???..Tempting

_____________________________

I have greatly enjoyed the second blooming...suddenly you find at the age of 50, that a whole new life has opened before you.........Agatha Christie.

You must make tracks into the unknown~~Thoreau

(in reply to hereyesruponyou)
Profile   Post #: 54
RE: it IS easier to lie online - 6/2/2007 6:14:30 PM   
addicted2it


Posts: 322
Joined: 5/31/2004
From: California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: hereyesruponyou

...it is so much easier to lie on the Internet than in other social interactions. minus the perceptible cues of voice tone, eye contact, and expression, email so lends itself to emotional deception that people assume outrageously fabricated identities, simply because they can."

Might also explain why there is so much misunderstanding on these boards.....


People lie and misrepresent themselves online, and it DOES happen often and for a variety of reasons which you mentioned.

Case in point: The other day, I was browsing the thumbnail photos of people who posted there profiles on CM when I came across a photo of a very beautiful femmedomme who was obvioulsy new to the scene.  After reading her profile, I sent her a short message of admiration, as well as a polite suggestion about how to meet others in R/L.

Anyway, she sent me a response in which she asked me if I was the same person who corresponded with her a short time ago.  She  also said that they were just getting to know each other when he up and disappeared.  And then she asked,, "Are you blowing me off?"

I would have known if I had ever written to her before, plus I checked my "Sent Mail" folder and found no record of any correspondence with anyone who matched that screen name.  So, I wrote back to say that unfortunately it was not me...and that if he had blown her off, then it would be his loss and not her's.

After thinking about this a bit, it occurred that the person in question might have been lying to her, and when they were scheduled to meet face-to-face, he just couldn't pull it off, so he disappeared.  I mean, she is exquisite, so why would anyone be fool-enough to let her get away, unless that person was not telling the truth to begin with?




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Profile   Post #: 55
RE: it IS easier to lie online - 6/2/2007 6:23:20 PM   
VeryMercurial


Posts: 620
Joined: 6/5/2006
Status: offline 		Don't tell me people actually lie online?

(in reply to addicted2it)
Profile   Post #: 56
RE: it IS easier to lie online - 6/2/2007 6:38:17 PM   
michaelOfGeorgia


Posts: 4253
Status: offline 		of course it is...nobody can see the crossed fingers, so no need to hide them behind the back...LOL

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Profile   Post #: 57
RE: it IS easier to lie online - 6/2/2007 6:53:09 PM   
addicted2it


Posts: 322
Joined: 5/31/2004
From: California
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: VeryMercurial

Don't tell me people actually lie online?


No, they only fibb a little, and then tell themselves that it really didn't hurt anyone's feelings. 

"Oh, your honor, I didn't really mean to do it!"

Yeah, right!


< Message edited by addicted2it -- 6/2/2007 6:54:36 PM >

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Profile   Post #: 58
RE: it IS easier to lie online - 6/2/2007 7:20:29 PM   
MellowSir


Posts: 260
Joined: 4/17/2007
Status: offline 		Sure is easier to lie online, and as for those who have online "relationships" yet never actually see the other in person, well they're welcome to their little fantasies, reality means less to some than others.....by the way, I'm rich, have no problems whatsoever, and am a master at all things in bdsm lol

(in reply to SunNMoon)
Profile   Post #: 59
RE: it IS easier to lie online - 6/3/2007 3:07:31 AM   
ExSteelAgain


Posts: 1803
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Georgia
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: hereyesruponyou
And i prefer books over movies/plays/etc. I like the fact that with a book I do the interpretation, i am not stuck with someone else's idea of what i should see in those words.


I would hope you would come close to that author's intent. Heh.

Seriously, I'll give you this about lying online vs RT. If someone is going to lie, they can probably lie easier from the standpoint of having fewer hints of the physical setting. As far as lack of facial expressions or what have you, a good onine writer will explain emotions and the expressions caused. It all depends on the abilities and sensitivities of those chatting. 

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Profile   Post #: 60
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