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RE: What is it with people? - 5/30/2007 7:55:52 PM

SunNMoon

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Joined: 3/18/2007
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very off topic, I'm sorry about that. But Sea what happened to the wallet?

Now on topic, Lady Alzara I wish you the best of luck. I'm sure you will find your dream submissive soon.

quote:

ORIGINAL: undergroundsea

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHugs
I also have to agree with HeavansKeeper as well--commitment is something men do not easily come to unless its their idea.

In 1990, I bought a wallet. And that wallet stayed with me until 2000! That's ten years folks! Whenever someone says I cannot commit or I have no staying power, I tell them about my wallet.

Cheers,

Sea

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RE: What is it with people? - 5/30/2007 8:07:22 PM

undergroundsea

Posts: 2400
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From: Austin, TX
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quote:

ORIGINAL: SunNMoon
very off topic, I'm sorry about that. But Sea what happened to the wallet?

It lies in a box in my closet. Before you ask me if I am polyamorous, I am not. I am active with one wallet only. Instead, what that says about me is that not only can I keep a long-term relationship, I am not one to throw out my exes onto the street.

Before you feel sad for my old wallet and ask of its loneliness, please allow me to add more. I have a friend whose standard gift is a wallet. And well he gave me a gift two or three times--apparently without remembering that he had already given me a wallet as a gift the time before. Furthermore, the wallets he gave are maroon, whereas I went to a school where we had to take an oath to use burnt orange accessories over maroon ones. So those wallets also lie in that box and my old wallet is amongst kin.

Cheers,

Sea

< Message edited by undergroundsea -- 5/30/2007 8:12:56 PM >

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RE: What is it with people? - 5/31/2007 11:07:40 AM

Aimtoplease101

Posts: 319
Joined: 2/8/2006
From: San Diego, California
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I don't think the dynamic is really that much different from the vanilla dating world. Sometimes one of the persons "involved" just decides that the relationship isn't right for them. Some people handle the "parting" simply by disappearing-- no return phone calls, emails, etc. Perhaps it seems easier than a difficult or awkward disengagement.

Regards, ATP

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RE: What is it with people? - 5/31/2007 12:29:05 PM

MissHarlet

Posts: 2728
Joined: 9/11/2005
From: El Paso , TX US
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Manners count! What happened to common courtesy.
It takes little time to send a quick email and is totally nonconfrontational way of saying " Im sorry this isnt working for me and I wish you luck and happiness" or something to that effect!

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to be trusted you must be willing to trust.

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RE: What is it with people? - 5/31/2007 1:58:03 PM

LadyPact

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I happen to agree with both of these last points. Even after actually getting to the point of meeting, and following through, some just flake. They disappear, close accounts (sometimes at the same time they start a new one), and just seem to vanish. Yes, manners do count, but unfortunately, not everyone is going to use them.

Between the two of these things, is where some of Us tend to get discouraged, especially if We do know what We're seeking. More often than not, We run into the type of those that don't. You just have to shrug your shoulders, accept that in some cases, you'll never figure some people out, and just hope the next one is more promising.

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RE: What is it with people? - 5/31/2007 2:00:46 PM

Lordandmaster

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Joined: 6/22/2004
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Look on the bright side. He's not stalking you. He's not spreading malicious rumors about you. He's not trying to blackmail you.

If a relationship doesn't work out and the other person just withdraws to nowhere, these days I breathe a sigh of relief. The alternatives can get pretty ugly.

quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyAlzara

I'm venting, so bear with Me. I meet a boy...put him through hoops to see if there is more there than a craving for kinky sex..introduce him to the local community, such as it is...and then....they drop off the planet as it were. The occassional...hope You're well, Ma'am type of message...and disappears...or better yet, deletes his profile.

Q:Why do P/people do this kinda thing?

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RE: What is it with people? - 5/31/2007 9:17:03 PM

MHOO314

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My Dear Lady Alzara, people are what they are, most don't change because they find this proclivity---they are what they are---better you do those things and they disappear than they stay as a poser---and perhaps Dear Lady they pale in the light of Your glow.

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RE: What is it with people? - 5/31/2007 11:26:37 PM

MaamJay

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I have the greatest empathy with the OP, LadyPact and all the others who have experienced the frustration and disappointment of disappearing subs/slaves.

My latest "poof boy" phoned again about 10 days after doing the disappearing act to tell Me that he's been collared all along (and for the past 6 years) to another Mistress (in Germany) whom he'd not met yet ... but now he's finished "testing himself" by courting Me for 3 months and promising Me his service he is going to move to be with Her! I was NOT impressed, surprise surprise! I was beginning to beat Myself up for being a poor judge of character when Master reminded Me that what I had been seeing was the "slave beneath" ... not the bullshitter on the top! So despite some misgivings I was willing to persist because I could see the slave desire underneath. What severely pissed Me off is that he thought a simple apology would make it all right, he had no idea of how cruel this was to Me to be involved without My consent in his little experiment. I can only hope that if he's really gone to Germany to this Mistress that (a) She's not actually real and so he ends up stuck or (b) She sees through him sooner rather than later and dismisses the lying little hound! Any German Mistresses reading this site who are acquiring an Indian male slave who recently lived in Australia for 2 months?? Email Me on the "other side" of collarme!

Maam Jay

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Post #: 28

RE: What is it with people? - 6/1/2007 12:48:33 AM

pinksissyPA

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quote:

ORIGINAL: LadyHeart

I once watched a very interesting documentary on the psychology of the male submissive. The Mistress/psychologist who fronted it said that there were three types of subs. Type One: They do it once to fulfill a fantasy, then disappear, never to try it again. Type Two: It's something they crave a fix of from time to time, but it's not a permanent need. They get their fix, then disappear till next time. Type Three: the full time submissive, who has submission deeply embedded in their psyche. I tend to think that this is a very perceptive analysis, and have since worked on the assumption that as Types One and Two far out number Type Three, I'm going to get about a 1 in 20 "strike rate" so to speak, wicked chuckle.
:))
LadyHeart

That is probably very true Ma'am but it excludes the online wankers which far outnumber the other types.

Repectfully,

pink

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RE: What is it with people? - 6/1/2007 10:44:09 AM

LadyPact

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MaamJay, Wow! That is harsh! (And not in a good way.)

The only thing that I can say in your particular case is that it might be some small consolation that you do know what happend. Yes, it was underhanded and completely devoid of character, but the truth did come out in the end. You might have been left wondering and never knowing the answer. Small positive to it (I hope).

Truthfully, I was wondering if I should make the post. It is My sincere hope that My comment did not upset you.

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RE: What is it with people? - 6/1/2007 6:26:54 PM

Laura

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He got scared off by the reality. Maybe he began to realize you are a real person, with real needs of your own. Maybe he changed his mind cause reading porn sites requires less real effort from him.

I don't think many men actually want a Domme once they get one. The fantasy crumbles when it's not all his way with the Domme in the background doing what he thinks she should be doing, according to the porn he read.

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