RE: BDSM glue (Full Version)

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azzmaster -> RE: BDSM glue (5/30/2007 2:18:58 AM)

intensity, being able to cut to the chase quicker n get that booty, the much greater likelihood of someone i meet here being cool with anal fisting thansay on match.com or christiansingles.com



jessk -> RE: BDSM glue (5/30/2007 7:22:32 AM)

quote:

What makes BDSM stick to you. What are the driving forces to put and keep you here.

Quite simply, the person that I am with is what 'makes it stick to me' .



mythi -> RE: BDSM glue (5/30/2007 7:23:06 AM)

As others have stated, I diferentiate between 'BDSM' and D/s.  One is more action, the other more attitude.  For me, I see the trappings of BDSM as a tool (ie the means) for D/s which is the end goal for me.  I know others who are just the opposite, who use control to get to the 'fun stuff'.  Personally I could, if I had to, live without any of it if my partner were still capably in charge.

But I do specify 'capable' leadership.  I'm quite adept at being in charge if I have to be, and if the leader isnt leading it'll drive me to compensate for that, taking over as needed to keep things functioning.  But I HATE HATE HATE (with much loathing) being the one in charge.  And especially if the other person thinks they should lead, regardless of their ability to do so, there will much conflict and gnashing of teeth.

So for me a lot of the draw of D/s is finding/being with someone who has the inclination, and hopefully thereby developed the ability, to be in charge of their lives including the parts that involve me.

That and I'm a total bondage slut. [:D]



mstrjx -> RE: BDSM glue (5/30/2007 8:41:07 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: mythi

That and I'm a total bondage slut. [:D]



And attention whore, apparently.  Just like I like 'em.

Jeff



mythi -> RE: BDSM glue (5/30/2007 11:06:01 AM)

Yeah, how exactly did that slip in there?  Hmm?

Not that the two are at all mutually exclusive...[;)]



farieanne -> RE: BDSM glue (5/30/2007 11:59:58 AM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: mstrjx

And attention whore, apparently.  Just like I like 'em.

Jeff


i think most, (i know not all, there are exceptions to every rule), sub/slaves are attention whores. it's part of the appeal. our Dom/mes can't command us and ignore us at the same time, LoL! 



lateralist1 -> RE: BDSM glue (5/30/2007 12:14:31 PM)

You are probably right except that a good Master or Mistress will work out a way to stop you attention seeking when he oe she doesn't like it.
But their are more complicated reasons sometimes. Lack of self esteem. Early training. Abuse both sexual and physical. Social advancement. The list is endless.
The best one was my first slave. It has taken me a long time to figure this one out and I'm still not sure I have it right but I think he wanted an excuse to leave his wife. He allowed her to find his phone and she read my texts. Obviously thinking he was having an affair gave him the excuse to leave her. He then left me. All human life is here and a lot of it isn't very nice.



mythi -> RE: BDSM glue (5/30/2007 12:26:19 PM)

quote:

ORIGINAL: lateralist1

You are probably right except that a good Master or Mistress will work out a way to stop you attention seeking when he oe she doesn't like it.


Or in my case, a good Master will simply be just as needy and neurotically codependent as I am.  Right Master?  lol

And for the record, he chose the new avatar.  It's got a few layers of meaning for us. *g*



JasonF -> RE: BDSM glue (6/1/2007 10:19:17 AM)

That's a really interesting question. I really can't put my finger on it. I am a bit sadistic, but that's more of a recent development.

I think it has to do with taking care of people. When I love someone, I want to be the person to look out for them. It's about sex some too, and I like causing pain, and seeing the look of trust alternating with fear.

Maybe that's it. The trust. Someone trusting you enough to give their live over to you is an amazing thing. (I'm such a sap).

Overall... I can't put my finger on it, but the more time I spend in the lifestyle, and the people around it, the more I love it.



dogobedience -> RE: BDSM glue (6/6/2007 4:25:11 PM)

I am always interested in hearing views from others in this lifestyle, new or seasoned.



colouredin -> RE: BDSM glue (6/6/2007 4:53:23 PM)

I find it hard to explain any of it, im very new to it, i was aware in nilla relationships that i asked my partner to be more dominant, and certain aspects of the kink attracted me but im still very much feeling my way, i have great crisises of consciounce thinking maybe i shouldnt be interested in this, sometimes it makes me concerned what about feminism? but really i am happier now than i have ever been, i feel that submission is not learned its simply something you are, i feel far more confident and attractive. When i went to my first fair and club a few months ago it felt like the most natural place in the world, it was such an emotional feeling i half wanted to cry saying thank god this is where i belong, these are my people and this is who i am. 



dogobedience -> RE: BDSM glue (6/6/2007 7:44:14 PM)

An intangible feeling is in you (the glue) embrace it and ENJOY!



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