RE: BDSM glue

Collarspace Discussion Forums

Home Login Search

RE: BDSM glue

View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest

All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> General BDSM Discussion >> RE: BDSM glue

Page: << < prev 1 [2]

Message

<< Older Topic Newer Topic >>

RE: BDSM glue - 5/30/2007 2:18:58 AM

azzmaster

Posts: 864
Joined: 2/15/2007
Status: offline

intensity, being able to cut to the chase quicker n get that booty, the much greater likelihood of someone i meet here being cool with anal fisting thansay on match.com or christiansingles.com

(in reply to farieanne)

Profile

Post #: 21

RE: BDSM glue - 5/30/2007 7:22:32 AM

jessk

Posts: 34
Status: offline

quote:

What makes BDSM stick to you. What are the driving forces to put and keep you here.

Quite simply, the person that I am with is what 'makes it stick to me' .

_____________________________

Jess

(in reply to dogobedience)

Profile

Post #: 22

RE: BDSM glue - 5/30/2007 7:23:06 AM

mythi

Posts: 257
Joined: 2/25/2007
From: Naples, FL
Status: offline

As others have stated, I diferentiate between 'BDSM' and D/s. One is more action, the other more attitude. For me, I see the trappings of BDSM as a tool (ie the means) for D/s which is the end goal for me. I know others who are just the opposite, who use control to get to the 'fun stuff'. Personally I could, if I had to, live without any of it if my partner were still capably in charge.

But I do specify 'capable' leadership. I'm quite adept at being in charge if I have to be, and if the leader isnt leading it'll drive me to compensate for that, taking over as needed to keep things functioning. But I HATE HATE HATE (with much loathing) being the one in charge. And especially if the other person thinks they should lead, regardless of their ability to do so, there will much conflict and gnashing of teeth.

So for me a lot of the draw of D/s is finding/being with someone who has the inclination, and hopefully thereby developed the ability, to be in charge of their lives including the parts that involve me.

That and I'm a total bondage slut.

_____________________________

“The truth doesn’t change based on our ability to stomach it.”
Flannery O’Connor

(in reply to azzmaster)

Profile

Post #: 23

RE: BDSM glue - 5/30/2007 8:41:07 AM

mstrjx

Posts: 2045
Joined: 11/27/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: mythi

That and I'm a total bondage slut.

And attention whore, apparently. Just like I like 'em.

Jeff

_____________________________

Know thyself. It's the best gift you can ever give yourself.

(in reply to mythi)

Profile

Post #: 24

RE: BDSM glue - 5/30/2007 11:06:01 AM

mythi

Posts: 257
Joined: 2/25/2007
From: Naples, FL
Status: offline

Yeah, how exactly did that slip in there? Hmm?

Not that the two are at all mutually exclusive...

_____________________________

“The truth doesn’t change based on our ability to stomach it.”
Flannery O’Connor

(in reply to mstrjx)

Profile

Post #: 25

RE: BDSM glue - 5/30/2007 11:59:58 AM

farieanne

Posts: 65
Joined: 2/24/2007
From: Las Vegas
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: mstrjx

And attention whore, apparently. Just like I like 'em.

Jeff

i think most, (i know not all, there are exceptions to every rule), sub/slaves are attention whores. it's part of the appeal. our Dom/mes can't command us and ignore us at the same time, LoL!

_____________________________

Master Peter's

"A woman will always sacrifice herself if you give her the opportunity. It is her favourite form of self-indulgence.” - William Somerset Maugham

(in reply to mstrjx)

Profile

Post #: 26

RE: BDSM glue - 5/30/2007 12:14:31 PM

lateralist1

Posts: 886
Joined: 11/22/2006
Status: offline

You are probably right except that a good Master or Mistress will work out a way to stop you attention seeking when he oe she doesn't like it.
But their are more complicated reasons sometimes. Lack of self esteem. Early training. Abuse both sexual and physical. Social advancement. The list is endless.
The best one was my first slave. It has taken me a long time to figure this one out and I'm still not sure I have it right but I think he wanted an excuse to leave his wife. He allowed her to find his phone and she read my texts. Obviously thinking he was having an affair gave him the excuse to leave her. He then left me. All human life is here and a lot of it isn't very nice.

(in reply to farieanne)

Profile

Post #: 27

RE: BDSM glue - 5/30/2007 12:26:19 PM

mythi

Posts: 257
Joined: 2/25/2007
From: Naples, FL
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: lateralist1

You are probably right except that a good Master or Mistress will work out a way to stop you attention seeking when he oe she doesn't like it.

Or in my case, a good Master will simply be just as needy and neurotically codependent as I am. Right Master? lol

And for the record, he chose the new avatar. It's got a few layers of meaning for us. *g*

_____________________________

“The truth doesn’t change based on our ability to stomach it.”
Flannery O’Connor

(in reply to lateralist1)

Profile

Post #: 28

RE: BDSM glue - 6/1/2007 10:19:17 AM

JasonF

Posts: 61
Joined: 5/30/2005
Status: offline

That's a really interesting question. I really can't put my finger on it. I am a bit sadistic, but that's more of a recent development.

I think it has to do with taking care of people. When I love someone, I want to be the person to look out for them. It's about sex some too, and I like causing pain, and seeing the look of trust alternating with fear.

Maybe that's it. The trust. Someone trusting you enough to give their live over to you is an amazing thing. (I'm such a sap).

Overall... I can't put my finger on it, but the more time I spend in the lifestyle, and the people around it, the more I love it.

_____________________________

Jay
TNG-NC Council Member
engaged to my girl, junecleaver

(in reply to mythi)

Profile

Post #: 29

RE: BDSM glue - 6/6/2007 4:25:11 PM

dogobedience

Posts: 536
Joined: 3/30/2006
Status: offline

I am always interested in hearing views from others in this lifestyle, new or seasoned.

_____________________________

I start and/or reply to posts to further my abilities and share my experiences in this fantastic lifestyle.

I hope I am an intellectual instigator, making people think and or laugh and nothing more.

Tiger, proud owner of kali aka Tigerproperty

(in reply to JasonF)

Profile

Post #: 30

RE: BDSM glue - 6/6/2007 4:53:23 PM

colouredin

Posts: 4279
Joined: 2/2/2007
Status: offline

I find it hard to explain any of it, im very new to it, i was aware in nilla relationships that i asked my partner to be more dominant, and certain aspects of the kink attracted me but im still very much feeling my way, i have great crisises of consciounce thinking maybe i shouldnt be interested in this, sometimes it makes me concerned what about feminism? but really i am happier now than i have ever been, i feel that submission is not learned its simply something you are, i feel far more confident and attractive. When i went to my first fair and club a few months ago it felt like the most natural place in the world, it was such an emotional feeling i half wanted to cry saying thank god this is where i belong, these are my people and this is who i am.

(in reply to dogobedience)

Profile

Post #: 31

RE: BDSM glue - 6/6/2007 7:44:14 PM

dogobedience

Posts: 536
Joined: 3/30/2006
Status: offline

An intangible feeling is in you (the glue) embrace it and ENJOY!

_____________________________

I start and/or reply to posts to further my abilities and share my experiences in this fantastic lifestyle.

I hope I am an intellectual instigator, making people think and or laugh and nothing more.

Tiger, proud owner of kali aka Tigerproperty

(in reply to colouredin)

Profile

Post #: 32