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Complete and total rant - 6/9/2007 8:48:48 AM

octavia

Posts: 377
Joined: 5/20/2007
Status: offline

Son of a bitch!
My x husband was just here, grinning all over the place. Of course we all know what that means, the lucky bastard got laid last night. We have been seperated about a year now i woud say and I am actually happy for him.
He is vanilla and our entire marriage has been sexually disfunctional. I just couldn't respond to him sexually, I would try... I would fake. I was very aware of his ego, but you know i just couldn't keep it up. Well.. he couldn't keep it up, that was a part of the problem but i digress.

From our discussion, things went really well, he got an amazing ego boost in how much she responded to him. One part of me is validated. I mean I suspected that our whole fooking trouble was compatibility and if we could both find suitable partners we would be fine. Well, on his end that has now been proven at least priliminarily true. He really is a good person, I do love him, and i am happy for him. He deserves to be with a woman who he can satisfy and who satisfies him.
Now for the bitchy,ranty, whiny part. Damn it!!!!!!!!!! Im the one that has shoulder the entire responsibility for all this ending. Hell, I've shouldered all the responsibility period!!! This was the FIRST girl he has dated, I've been on prolly fifty first dates...( they are not all turning m down

Im just damn picky after that mess of a marriage, and wasted about 6 months dating vanilla still before i figured i t out. ITS NOT FAIR. I want to be able to finally.. after 13 fooking years feel turned on by the touch of a lover. I just want to pull my hair out.
Goddamnsonofabitchfookinshit!

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RE: Complete and total rant - 6/9/2007 10:16:32 AM

nyrisa

Posts: 1830
Joined: 11/20/2006
Status: offline

Come on now, face it. It is different with men. Like I've heard men say, "Even the worst piece of ass I ever had, was pretty damned good." If Mr. X had been on a dry spell, he'd be grinning ear to ear if he had banged Quasimodo. And, for all he knows, she probably faked it, too.

Hang in there. I am sure the right one will come along for you. *smiles*

_____________________________

A true lady takes off her dignity with her clothes and does her whorish best. At other times you can be as modest and dignified as your persona requires. Robert Heinlein

The last thing I want to do is hurt you...but it is still on my list.

(in reply to octavia)

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RE: Complete and total rant - 6/9/2007 11:27:42 AM

NakedOnMyChain

Posts: 2431
Joined: 11/29/2004
From: Indiana
Status: offline

She's got a point. Guys who have fallen for the faking routine are a little more... erm... oblivious when it comes to other women faking.

Good luck looking! There's a great person out there for you.

_____________________________

"Oh, it's torture, but I'm almost there."
~The Cure

"I ask for so little. Just fear me, love me, do as I say, and I will be your slave."
~The Labyrinth

(in reply to nyrisa)

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RE: Complete and total rant - 6/9/2007 7:16:15 PM

octavia

Posts: 377
Joined: 5/20/2007
Status: offline

thanks for the support. No.. no faking, he really did find someone he is compatible with. I really really am happy as hell for him. He is a good guy, just a vanilla guy. Its like my ending the relationship is finally starting to pay off for him. He is getting to see what sex and intimacy can be, and not having to worry about my kinky D/s needs. I told him tonight that i had found this community, he seemed pretty up on it actually!!!! He doesnt know the first thing, but he has lived with me for the last 13 years. Go figure. He wishes any and all men who might try to date me luck.