julietsierra -> RE: Why is age such a deciding factor for many women? (6/14/2007 1:31:33 PM)
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quote:
ORIGINAL: LuckyAlbatross I have to admit I never understood allowing your own kids have that sort of say in who you are with- they can't respect you, your choices or someone else just because of age? Does that really teach them to respect diversity, respect you as an adult? Obviously the person you bring in MUST be a respectful person and fit well in the existing family, but I don't see how age is automatically a big deal for that. Nor do I think one needs to date someone very different in order to teach someone about diversity or respect- I simply don't see how it necessarily causes a problem either. And I've never understood the "I've got a daughter your age, so I can't be with you" issue either. I think it tends to be more the parent are unable to separate relationships than anything. Perhaps because I'm polyamorous and I understand forming very unique simultaneous relationships which respect eachother that make it difficult for me to understand. Now, plain personal preference I completely understand. Well, I have no problems separating relationships. My children come first. My Master comes first. They share that position in varying degrees based on who they are. But since I am a member of my family and have people who aren't all adults to be concerned with, I keep things as "normal" as possible. This means my interest in bdsm is mine and mine alone. It means my interest in swinging is mine and mine alone. I do not allow either of those interests to touch upon the lives of my children as much as I possibly can. And as I am a single mother in a community of largely married couples, I try to fit in around here as much as possible. I'm even looking forward to when my youngest graduates from high school so that I can change my name back to my maiden name. Until then, I won't do anything because it's not my children's responsibility to "explain" their mother to anyone - and that includes my last name and theirs, as well as the men in my life. And I really don't think I have too much to worry about regarding their "diversity training." We are a diverse family as it is. However, explaining why mom has more than one man in her bed or why mom is dating someone a couple of years older than her son is more diversity than I'm willing to venture into. Why is that so difficult to understand? I'm an adult. I don't give a rat's ass who fucks who and how much or how often. My children get to make their own choices in this life. This is a kink we live and while I find it normal for me, I don't presume it's normal for my children. I know how much kids talk amongst themselves and deal daily with children whose parents are not making good choices in terms of what's right for their children. Personally, I just really do not need to fuck and be beat enough to make choices that are a detriment to the people I have the responsibility of caring for, My children are not going to be a part of that crowd of largely dysfunctional teens if I have anything to do with it. To the original poster, if dating someone twice your age is so darned important to you that you can't understand why it's not important to me, well then, just stick around. My Master has promised to release me on my 102nd birthday. He says then I can go rob the cradles of all the nursing homes. We can make a date. How's that? juliet
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