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Breath Play Advice - 6/19/2007 12:49:10 AM

Jberg

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Have a friend that wants to try breath play. I am concerned about leaving marks on her neck Any advice on how not to leave marks?

John

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RE: Breath Play Advice - 6/19/2007 12:52:30 AM

dincubus

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personally i have always considered breath play too dangerous with anyone i have ever played with. i have tried once.. and the results were not good

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RE: Breath Play Advice - 6/19/2007 5:31:38 AM

Stephann

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I regularly engage and enjoy breathplay. Here's a few considerations.

First off, breathplay doesn't simply mean cutting off air intake. If anything, that is probably the most risky of 'breathplay' activities. More commonly, I engage in a type of choking where the object is to restrict - not block - the ability to breathe.

My first venture into it was with a girlfriend who enjoyed breathplay. She showed me exactly how she wanted my hand. Try it on yourself, by putting your thumb and index fingers in a V on your own collarbone. Now push in and up slightly till it slides off the collarbone. From there, you don't need to slide the hand up, just in. You'll find there's a sensation of your throat tightening, but no actual pain. You can push in that spot with both hands (though carefully), and that tightening sensation will increase, with minimal risk of any damage. You'll find you can still breathe and even talk. Yet, it is that tightening sensation that creates a sense of alarm.

A technique I use myself is with a belt. Using a very thick belt, wrap it around the neck as low to the base of the neck as possible. From there, you can pull with light or moderate effort (think the force you use to open a refridgerator) with very little risk. Be careful not to tear the skin with the buckle.

Something VITAL to this sort of play is to discuss non verbal signals. Watch her face, and make sure she knows to wave or 'blink' her hands if she's in distress. This is a VERY dangerous type of activity, no matter how safely you approach it, so be prepared to let off immediately. NEVER use any sort of restraint on the middle or upper part of the throat; severe injury or death are not only possible, but likely if you misjudge.

Play safe,

Stephan

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RE: Breath Play Advice - 6/19/2007 5:33:45 AM

ExtremeOwnerIL

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Jberg

Have a friend that wants to try breath play. I am concerned about leaving marks on her neck Any advice on how not to leave marks?

John

I have different advice and questions -
1. How much breathplay have you done in the past?
2. How familiar are you with the signs of various stages of oxygen deprivation?
3. Do you know CPR?
4. Have you played enough with your bottom so that you know her physical reactions well enough to manage her safely if she can't communicate?

Based on how you answer those questions, I have different advice.

If you can't give answers to all 4, I'd say stay away from the breathplay until you've gathered more knowledge. It's not a "holier than thou" thing, it's a "this is not just spanking, this is life/death kinda stuff." Leaving marks is the least of your concern. Lack of knowledge on a risky form of play is a bigger concern. Learn the risks, make sure your bottom is aware of the risks and play within your means/knowledge base.

If you're familiar with breathplay, and you've got the requisite experience, then you know the areas of the neck that are prone to marks and you should already have played with her enough to know how she marks. The only way you're going to avoid marking the neck is to engage in play that doesn't include the possibility of marks.

If you haven't seen it before, Jay Wiseman has info on the web about breath play. It's not in favor of it, but it does point out a lot of areas that you should be aware of so you can make up your own mind and know your own comfort with the risks.
http://members.aol.com/OldRope/breamain.htm

You might get some snarky answers, but I'm not trying to be snarky, just advice I'd give anyone asking about breathplay. I do this VERY little, and it's more of a mindfuck than actually oxygen deprivation.

Kindest regards,
EO

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RE: Breath Play Advice - 6/19/2007 6:02:37 AM

earthycouple

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I'm with ExtremeOwnerIL. He's right.

I'm a nurse with CPR cert and will not engage in breath play until I've learned first hand in person from someone I know to be damn good at it. Then I must experience it myself next. Then I will try it but only with the person who taught me RIGHT there to guide me. Then once I am comfy with my new "skill" I'll take it home.

I personally feel this is how we should approach everything but ah that's my opinion.

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RE: Breath Play Advice - 6/19/2007 6:34:22 AM

YourShyPet

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I wonder have you considered not going for the throat so to say... I'm very eeky about having someones hands or something around my throat... but I do find it extremely exciting and pleasurable when my Daddy puts his hand over my mouth and pushes down, and up slightly blocking off my mouth and my nose... I'm sure it really works for us because I'm very small... hence have a small face, and he has very large hands... but it might be an option..... or a jumping off point for you... and it also gives you the option to in very close contact with the other persons face so you can guage their reaction to it... just a thought.

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RE: Breath Play Advice - 6/19/2007 6:55:51 AM

MstrssPassion

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first of all

you don't aply pressure to the throat...

merely mentioning "looking for ways to not mark the throat" is the mark of inexperience & most likely reason enough for you to NOT be engaging in this form of "play" because there could be a fine line between playing with someone & killing someone if you crush their trachea

< Message edited by MstrssPassion -- 6/19/2007 6:56:31 AM >

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RE: Breath Play Advice - 6/19/2007 7:36:52 AM

LuckyAlbatross

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Just don't touch the throat- cover the mouth and nose.

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RE: Breath Play Advice - 6/19/2007 8:17:22 AM

SimplyMichael

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Remember it is often the fantasy that is desired, you want to choke the mind not the body. Make her imagine she is being choked more than actually choking her. The hand over the mouth can be very hot.

People can and do die from breathplay, just google, cop and choke hold...

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RE: Breath Play Advice - 6/19/2007 10:04:01 AM

MasterFireMaam

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Most of what is termed "breath play" isn't that, it's "blood flow to the brain play". This is usually what's involved when you're squeezing the neck. It's really hard to describe this kind of play accurately without personal lessons. I, like others have, advise your friend find someone in real life who knows how to do this and learn from them. If he's leaving marks on her neck, he's most likely doing it wrong and/or squeezing unnecessarily hard.

For "true" breath play, "Hold your breath," is often very effective. Usually, just the sensation of a hand on the throat while holding your breath is enough to create the rush. But, if you want to guarentee they can't breath, don't squeeze the neck, cover the nose and mouth with your hands. If they pass out, remove your hands so that the autonomous response will reactivate breathing. Make sure you know CPR in case this does not happen. Make sure whomever is being choked knows the risks and agrees.

Master Fire

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RE: Breath Play Advice - 6/19/2007 10:14:36 AM

slaverosebeauty

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I enjoy breathplay, but, I avoid ANY sorta 'strangulation', just covering the nose and mouth works for me, its a bit safer; also, I am so vocal that most of the time sex ends up with some form of breathplay so I don't bother other people. The neck is an area were so many things can go wrong; I have heard horror stories.

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RE: Breath Play Advice - 6/19/2007 8:53:28 PM

RedheadGirlNY

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When presented with the "Breathplay is a hard limit" by a dominant, my first question is "You don't like to be deep-throated and control the action?"

Yes. Breathplay is very, very dangerous. Staying away from the throat is crucial. But I also consider being face-fucked while a fistful of my hair is used to control the situation every-bit as much "breathplay" as any of the other suggested activities.

Oh, yeah, you guessed it: I like it.

Red

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RE: Breath Play Advice - 6/20/2007 3:52:40 AM

Jberg

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I am amazed with the response to my question in such a short time. This is my first time posting and really glad I did. So far it is just something she approached me with. We have yet to play in this manor. I am just very uncomfortable with this play as I have not been taught, trained, etc.
Thank you to everyone whom replied in kind. I will look for a mentor who has experience in this play and learn in person, learn various stages of oxygen deprivation, keep my hands off the neck and control via nose and mouth, then lastly make sure we have another non audible safe gesture such as blinking. Again great advice.

Regards,
John

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RE: Breath Play Advice - 6/20/2007 11:32:54 AM

Wyrd

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Another tool I use is to have them squeeze my hand while I do it, should they want it to stop, they can release my hand, should they slip off into sub space or unconciousness they will release my hand.

This is not a "safe" form of play no matter you level of training, I am an EMT and a CPR instructor, and still it is not totally safe, I have had a girl who unknown to me and to her had a suppressed breathing impulse, when we did a little play, she stopped breathing, and required me giving rescue breaths to start her back breathing, luckily she did start again, and she now avoids breath play wisely.

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RE: Breath Play Advice - 6/20/2007 1:05:03 PM

JerryInTampa

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I've got a good chunk I'd like to say: but most has already been said.

If you are thinking about cutting blood flow to the brain (sleeper hold) don't. At least not if your level of skill is that you are asking here.

If you are planning on restricting airflow so that she falls unconsious. Don't. Same reason as above.

If you are thinking about interrupting breathing or creating a siuation where breath feels labored (danger play) then go to down. Several suggestions have been put forth on how to do it (letting your dead weight lie on top of her can tend to do it pretty well after only a minute or so too as she has to life your weight with each breath).

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RE: Breath Play Advice - 6/20/2007 1:08:20 PM

MarkMinette

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I've done it before, using an idea I had gotten from another site. Covering the nose/mouth with your hand alone takes some pressure and effort to keep it in place. Purchase a pair solid of gel footwear insoles. The gel makes a very good seal against the skin of the face, and can be easily be removed, or breathing can be controlled simply by slight hand pressure. Go slow with this practise, and don't try to "do it all" in one session.

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RE: Breath Play Advice - 6/20/2007 10:58:42 PM

LadyHeart

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I researched this whole topic a few months ago, and what stopped me in my tracks was something I read that basically said this:
Any form of asphyxiation play has the potential to trigger heart failure, with no warning, and since even the medical profession can't predict a heart stoppage of this nature, it is inherently unsafe. More people die from this form of play than all others put together (admittedly some of the deaths are auto erotic, ie people doing it to themselves and screwing up).
So I stopped researching and dropped the whole idea. The threat of it - yes. Doing it - no, not for me.
:))
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RE: Breath Play Advice - 6/20/2007 11:12:25 PM

SirTyson

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As everyone has stated already, this is a very dangerous area and should be researched long and hard before even attempting it. Go to clubs that have training classes or exhibitions to learn more about it as well. Talk to others who have first hand experience and can help you as well. Also you should have some type of non verbal sign your sub/slave can use to let you no enough is enough like someone stated as well.

That being said, there are plenty of ways to control someones breathing. As stated, I would refrain from using anything on someones throat as people have said. Other then using your hand over someones mouth you can use other things as well. Celefain wrap works, a piece of latex or rubber held over the mouth makes a great seal. A leather hood or mask with no holes. Another form of controlling breathing is the use of corsets. This is something you shoudl research as well before attemping as it could cause internal injuries if not done properly.

After you've done plenty of reserch and you feel your ready to practice, go clowly and cautiously. You might even think about having someone who is skilled in this area to watch you as well to be on the safe side and be there to instruct you.

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RE: Breath Play Advice - 6/21/2007 1:12:14 AM

Evanesce

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John, you've gotten some good information here, and the truth is that breath play is NOT safe. I say this as an occasional practitioner of breath play. It is NOT safe, and there is not one thing you can do to MAKE it safe. There are steps you can take to help mitigate the risk factors, but every form of breath play, be it asphyxia, compression, strangulation, or suffocation; has its own set of inherent dangers. Bruising is the least of your worries!

I would strongly urge you to seek your local educational group and find out if there are qualified educators near you in this area of play. If not, see if perhaps they can bring someone in to give a presentation on breath play. The Kaptin and I, ourselves, have been to a lecture/demo on this subject twice in the past year. This is one area where there is no such thing as too much knowledge. Because it's such a risky activity, it is imperative that both top AND bottom be aware and prepared.

Some people will suggest to you that it's "safer" to not cut off breathing, but to cut off blood supply to the brain instead. Not true. Do you know how quickly brain damage begins when blood supply (aka oxygen) is cut off to the brain? Do you know how quickly the heart will stop? And then there's that 100% invisible, undetectable risk of breaking loose arterial plaque, which then travels to the brain and results in death. Is it LIKELY to happen? Maybe not. CAN it happen? Absolutely it can! Is it a risk you're willing to take? Is it a risk your partner is willing to take?

Learn the techniques. Learn the risks. Weigh the risks and benefits for yourself, and then make an informed decision on whether or not you want to engage in breath play.

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RE: Breath Play Advice - 6/21/2007 5:14:22 AM

eyesopened

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Just out of curiosity.... has the "S/he wanted me to..." ever been a valid defense in a manslaughter trial?

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