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public leash - 6/30/2007 8:27:52 AM   
DSMXXX


Posts: 2
Joined: 3/13/2007
Status: offline 		My girlfriend and I have toyed with collar and leash around the house and privatly with friends.  We are new to BDSM, but both enjoy it a lot.  She wants to have me on a leash when we go shopping or to a public event.  I would like to comply but we are both gun shy.  (This my seem like a small step to most, but hey we all go to start somewhere.)  We were wondering if anyone has tired this and what their expericance was.  Good or Bad.  We also want to know if anyone was bold enough to ask why the other was on a leash, or was it just a lot of confused stares?   Thank You all for Your comments. 
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RE: public leash - 6/30/2007 8:34:41 AM   
joyinslavery


Posts: 955
Joined: 6/21/2005
Status: offline 		My dog doesn't seem to mind. 

Yeah, Wal-Mart or the mall on a leash is cool. 

_____________________________

"...we must learn, each one of us, that the world was not made for us, and that, however beautiful may be the things we crave, Fate may nevertheless forbid them."
-Bertrand Russell

Mainstream...The New Alternative

*Beware of dog*

(in reply to DSMXXX)
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RE: public leash - 6/30/2007 10:10:08 AM   
AAkasha


Posts: 4429
Joined: 11/27/2004
Status: offline
One word: Halloween.

I am assuming you mean normal mall?  If you mean shopping at a bdsm event - go for it, no one will be offended.

If you do the leash-in-public thing at the mall you are going to get looks and probably offend at least a couple of people.  I wonder why the need to do so?  Does it have to do with other people seeing you?  If so, consider your need for sexual stimulation, despite the discomfort of OTHER people, and how it might have a negative impact.  Try not to think so selfishly.  If the humiliation angle of it is so strong that you need to risk offending a few other people to get your satisfaction, time to do a little soul searching.

If you are both young (under 25?) and dress slightly alternative, you could pass as a couple of goth kids engaging in fashion, which probably is a lot easier. You could also dress like that at clubs without a second look.

Akasha


_____________________________

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(in reply to DSMXXX)
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RE: public leash - 6/30/2007 10:23:09 AM   
CherryLeopard


Posts: 10
Joined: 2/12/2006
Status: offline 		Certainly it could be fun for you to engage in a big public display, but I take the feelings of those around me in to consideration and would find it rather rude to walk a sub through a public mall on a full leash.  The vanilla folks in the mall haven't consented to seeing public D/s play so I try to respect that.  With that thought, a more subtle solution might be in order,  perhaps you could attach a short looped strap to a wrist cuff or bracelet-- more subtle but highly effective.  Or you could instruct the sub to follow exactly 2 steps behind you controlling their behavior that way.

(in reply to DSMXXX)
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RE: public leash - 6/30/2007 10:30:44 AM   
MsKatHouston


Posts: 1909
Joined: 6/7/2006
From: Houston, TX
Status: offline 		I think you would be able to get away with a collar a lot more than a leash in a public vanilla place.  If at a BDSM event, knock yourself out.  If in a place where there are those who are neither accepting not consenting of your particular kink, I would advise against doing it.  Taking all the "freedom of expression yadda yadda" philosophy out of it, the fact of the matter is, you may have more problems doing this in a non BDSM setting than you want to deal with.  At the least, you'll likely get some looks.  At the most you may be askked to leave.  Regardless, it is my opinion that it is a bit rude to flaunt like that and unnecessary. 

_____________________________

-Kat

~If you can't be a good example, you'll just have to serve as a horrible warning~

(in reply to CherryLeopard)
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RE: public leash - 6/30/2007 1:13:39 PM   
GoddessinDallas


Posts: 57
Joined: 11/25/2006
Status: offline 		INSANE
You are in IOWA...not NY where this activity is more common.

(in reply to MsKatHouston)
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RE: public leash - 6/30/2007 1:21:45 PM   
nyrisa


Posts: 1830
Joined: 11/20/2006
Status: offline 		I wonder why it is, that the first time someone gets to feeling a little frisky about displaying their own private kink, the first place they want to head for is the mall or shopping center? Why not plan an evening out clubbing, going to various nightclubs in your area, and strolling down the street on your leash then? Is it because the shock factor is more enjoyable when children and senior citizens see you? Does it make you feel tingly and special, to see kids asking their parents to explain this? Is it impossible to obtain the same thrill in an adults only environment? Or is it that you feel safer, in a family style atmosphere of a well lit and security patroled mall, rather than taking your chances on the responses of adults in clubs who would not be too bashful about striking up a conversation with you?

Sorry if this sounds negative. I encourage people to enjoy their lifestyle in any way they please, as long as no kids or unwilling bystanders are involved. But when kids can be expected to be around, keep it private, please.

_____________________________

A true lady takes off her dignity with her clothes and does her whorish best. At other times you can be as modest and dignified as your persona requires. Robert Heinlein

The last thing I want to do is hurt you...but it is still on my list.

(in reply to DSMXXX)
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RE: public leash - 6/30/2007 1:30:49 PM   
openmindedslave


Posts: 470
Joined: 2/27/2005
Status: offline 		funny you talk about public leashing .In a near by mall,tonight , the teenagers pretty much inherit the mall .Many are dressed  in black with makeup and died hair styles.I often see them wear a chain or a gir friend  will pull on a little chain from the boys crotch area.Don't see much going on there.They seem to get away with it..

(in reply to nyrisa)
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RE: public leash - 6/30/2007 1:32:49 PM   
nyrisa


Posts: 1830
Joined: 11/20/2006
Status: offline 		I don't generally look to teenagers to set examples for adult behavior, do you?

< Message edited by nyrisa -- 6/30/2007 1:33:04 PM >

_____________________________

A true lady takes off her dignity with her clothes and does her whorish best. At other times you can be as modest and dignified as your persona requires. Robert Heinlein

The last thing I want to do is hurt you...but it is still on my list.

(in reply to openmindedslave)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: public leash - 6/30/2007 3:55:38 PM   
petdave


Posts: 2479
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: nyrisa

I wonder why it is, that the first time someone gets to feeling a little frisky about displaying their own private kink, the first place they want to head for is the mall or shopping center? Why not plan an evening out clubbing, going to various nightclubs in your area, and strolling down the street on your leash then? Is it because the shock factor is more enjoyable when children and senior citizens see you? Does it make you feel tingly and special, to see kids asking their parents to explain this? Is it impossible to obtain the same thrill in an adults only environment? Or is it that you feel safer, in a family style atmosphere of a well lit and security patroled mall, rather than taking your chances on the responses of adults in clubs who would not be too bashful about striking up a conversation with you?

Sorry if this sounds negative. I encourage people to enjoy their lifestyle in any way they please, as long as no kids or unwilling bystanders are involved. But when kids can be expected to be around, keep it private, please.


Interesting that you should bring this up. When we went to the zoo recently, we probably saw a half-dozen families where one of the adults was holding a leash attached to the child. Brightly colored nylon, though, no leather- quite tacky, IMO, but to each their own.

Should i have asked them to explain themselves?

...dave

(in reply to nyrisa)
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RE: public leash - 6/30/2007 4:05:50 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: DSMXXX

My girlfriend and I have toyed with collar and leash around the house and privatly with friends.  We are new to BDSM, but both enjoy it a lot.  She wants to have me on a leash when we go shopping or to a public event.  I would like to comply but we are both gun shy.  (This my seem like a small step to most, but hey we all go to start somewhere.)  We were wondering if anyone has tired this and what their expericance was.  Good or Bad.  We also want to know if anyone was bold enough to ask why the other was on a leash, or was it just a lot of confused stares?   Thank You all for Your comments. 


I would only do it in select company. A public BDSM event like the Folsem Street Fair, I wouldn't have an issue, but I wouldn't go out to dinner at Olive Garden or Ruth's Chris while leashed. I would, however, wear locked cuffs on my wrists and ankles and a locked collar.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to DSMXXX)
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RE: public leash - 6/30/2007 4:08:23 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MsKatHouston

At the most you may be askked to leave. 


This is true. I would suggest not doing it if you are not prepared to handle being asked to leave gracefully.

My .02

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to MsKatHouston)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: public leash - 6/30/2007 4:10:09 PM   
SweetDommes


Posts: 3313
Joined: 10/5/2004
Status: offline 		Actually, depending on the location, your other attire and behavior, and the local 'decency laws' you may get taken to the closest police station to have a chat and pay a fine.

_____________________________

Miss Karen and Miss Holly

Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.

Friends are God's apology for relatives

(in reply to AquaticSub)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: public leash - 6/30/2007 4:13:32 PM   
DianeB269


Posts: 1596
Joined: 10/30/2006
Status: offline 		Look for fetish clubs in your area.


Diane

(in reply to DSMXXX)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: public leash - 6/30/2007 4:17:47 PM   
AquaticSub


Posts: 14867
Joined: 12/27/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SweetDommes

Actually, depending on the location, your other attire and behavior, and the local 'decency laws' you may get taken to the closest police station to have a chat and pay a fine.


This is true. I was assuming they would be acting and dressed "normally", just with a leash on.

_____________________________

Without my dominance you cannot submit. Without your submission I cannot dominate. You are my equal in this, though our roles are different.-Val

It was ok for him to beat me but then he tried to cuddle me! - Me

Member:Clan of the Scarlet O'Hair

(in reply to SweetDommes)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: public leash - 6/30/2007 4:18:19 PM   
Celeste43


Posts: 3066
Joined: 2/4/2006
From: NYS
Status: offline 		Instead of affronting strangers at the mall, why don't you make a surprise visit to your grandmother like that? After all, it isn't fair to make innocent bystanders deal with fallout from your nonsense if you don't have the courage to do it at home first.

Sheesh, some people

(in reply to DianeB269)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: public leash - 6/30/2007 4:24:54 PM   
amaidiamond


Posts: 1793
Joined: 2/6/2006
From: Watford / London
Status: offline 		I will admit to having run around Camden town with a leash on but then again I am an alternate/goth and in Camden town it is the non alternate/goths that stand out, people taking other people on leashes there may mean BDSM or may not, its pretty, common? I think is the word, London is also pretty open in general, and you can get away with a lot in an alternative/goth place or club than you can at the local coffee house lol

(in reply to Celeste43)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: public leash - 6/30/2007 4:25:07 PM   
AnonymouseTC


Posts: 30
Joined: 4/4/2007
Status: offline 		I can understand the fantasy thought of what the OP is talking about, but I would agree with what is posted by others on the reality of doing it. But I liked some of the suggestions that gave a similar kind of feel without putting everything out in the street for people to see. If you dig the mental part of the control that much then follow the advice of CherryLeopard above and have the sub walking just behind at all times and see if they can maintain the distance if the other person speeds up or slows down, or turns suddenly etc. But yeah, some fantasy stuff should stay that way.

(in reply to Celeste43)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: public leash - 6/30/2007 4:28:36 PM   
dougieboy


Posts: 19
Joined: 11/20/2006
Status: offline 		i can't believe the santimonius bs on these forums whenever the topic of public play comes up.  its like clockwork. do you really think people are going to be traumatized by seeing some dude on a leash?  there are a lot of weird people out there, and most people are fully aware of it.  relax.

(in reply to Celeste43)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: public leash - 6/30/2007 4:29:38 PM   
SweetDommes


Posts: 3313
Joined: 10/5/2004
Status: offline 		A thought for a less offensive and less obvious alternative ... use one of the wallet chains (if you live around punky/goth types or rednecks, no one will look twice ... we have a lot of both around here, which is why I thought of it lol) and she can tug you around by that.

_____________________________

Miss Karen and Miss Holly

Earth is the insane asylum for the universe.

Friends are God's apology for relatives

(in reply to AnonymouseTC)
Profile   Post #: 20
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