"Do terrible experiences make for terrible people?" Nietzsche

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"Do terrible experiences make for terrible people?... - 7/3/2007 5:25:55 AM

MadRabbit

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New topic of discussion...

Do you think that one day a story that is told here regarding a negative experience with a male Dom will go without a post automatically ruling that he is in fact an asshole, a cheating bastard, a predator, a fake, a wannabe, or a HNG?

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RE: "Do terrible experiences make for terrible peo... - 7/3/2007 5:44:58 AM

MasterGremlin

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No, because unfortunately, people no matter what "lifestyle", are narrow, reactionary and judgemental.

Sincerely,
minxy

(in reply to MadRabbit)

Post #: 2

RE: "Do terrible experiences make for terrible peo... - 7/3/2007 5:45:23 AM

earthycouple

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*S* someone say something about you, MadRabbit? I see where you are going with this...one person complains, we only have their point of view, and we all judge on that. Well in a perfect world we'd have our crystal balls out and we could tell where reality crosses perceptions. I think we do the best we can with limited information and I don't always side with the "victim". Victim being poster. I try to weed out those who are searching for attention or are making mountains out of molehills but we can't always do that.

So to answer the question...yes I think some of us can discern to a point.

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RE: "Do terrible experiences make for terrible peo... - 7/3/2007 6:03:15 AM

MzStormD

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From: Southern Illinois,USA
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I've always believed in the old saying my grampa told me "There's 3 sides to every story, his, hers, and the real story."

MzStormD

(in reply to earthycouple)

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RE: "Do terrible experiences make for terrible peo... - 7/3/2007 6:15:27 AM

mstrjx

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I think it would be difficult to come across a man who, in some way shape or form, isn't one of those to begin with. I try to stray away from all of those to begin with, and for the better part I succeed. You don't see the thread running loose in here where my name gets bandied by the malcontect.

But you can't avoid the inevitable. A old saw goes something like this..... "There's two kinds of people in the world. There are assholes, and then there are those people who are assholes and just don't know it (or admit to it)."

Which one are you?

Jeff

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RE: "Do terrible experiences make for terrible peo... - 7/3/2007 6:27:02 AM

becca333

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Feeling a little tender? You do seem to identify with those 'bad' Doms a lot.

(in reply to MadRabbit)

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RE: "Do terrible experiences make for terrible peo... - 7/3/2007 6:45:47 AM

Faramir

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quote:

ORIGINAL: becca333

Feeling a little tender? You do seem to identify with those 'bad' Doms a lot.

Feeling a little tender? You do seem to identify with bitter, vindictive subs.

Anyway, no one has said anything lately about MR--I am sure he is speaking in a general sense. When a female submissive posts here about a negative experience, or about doubts, the vast majority of female subs responding assume that the OP has been victimized in some way, and express contempt for the presumed violator/predator.

Likewise, while a minority of male doms say the same thing, to whit: "Teh lifestyle is full of predaters you must be careful many r fakes, wannabees and dangerous (not like me, I'm so different and speshul)," the majority voice something excuplatory or a rejection of a rush to judgement.

We project ourselves into those roles based on gender, and since we are "good," then given the negative experience, it couldn't be our fault, the "other" must be "bad." It's a good example of how we onconsciously center our dialogue and our horizon of expectation on ourselves. Just a human trait.

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RE: "Do terrible experiences make for terrible peo... - 7/3/2007 6:56:08 AM

kiyari

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Actually, my take on the OP's point was... that it is hardly news when a 'Domly' poseur takes advantage of someone in here... and then the noble calling of 'Dominant' is tarred in that person's experience, in consequence.

Just hazarding a guess, really fairly clueless

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Black Water Dragon

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RE: "Do terrible experiences make for terrible peo... - 7/3/2007 7:00:14 AM

beargonewild

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quote:

ORIGINAL: MadRabbit

New topic of discussion...

Do you think that one day a story that is told here regarding a negative experience with a male Dom will go without a post automatically ruling that he is in fact an asshole, a cheating bastard, a predator, a fake, a wannabe, or a HNG?

I would have to respond yes and no to your question. We humans being emtional creatures and many of us do voice our opinion based more on emotional reaction before stopping to clearly consider the other side of the story. If a poster relates a negative experience on here, it would be greatly helpful is the other person also posted their side of the issue. Having both sides to a negative experience does permit a clearer understanding of said situation and hopefully less likely to give a one sided opinion.

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(in reply to MadRabbit)

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RE: "Do terrible experiences make for terrible peo... - 7/3/2007 7:18:27 AM

stella40

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From: London, UK
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I see your point MR and it is a good point, but good people can have negative experiences too.

I think it's called life.

And then there's people. Everyone has an asshole and an opinion. It's just that there are a few who get mixed up as to which is which.

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I try to take one day at a time, but several days come and attack me at once. (Jennifer Unlimited)

If you can't be a good example then you'll just have to be a horrible warning.

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RE: "Do terrible experiences make for terrible peo... - 7/3/2007 8:33:17 AM

becca333

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quote:

ORIGINAL: Faramir

quote:

ORIGINAL: becca333

Feeling a little tender? You do seem to identify with those 'bad' Doms a lot.

Feeling a little tender? You do seem to identify with bitter, vindictive subs.

Since my personal sub experiences have been good I don't know what I'd have to be bitter about. I've frequently stated how fortunate I am, and how much fun I've had.

But it's nice to see you guys sticking together on a thread about how horrible subs are for sticking together. I appreciate the fine irony.

(in reply to Faramir)

Post #: 11

RE: "Do terrible experiences make for terrible peo... - 7/3/2007 8:38:12 AM

MstrssPassion

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oh good grief charlie brown... ya'll didn't toss enough at each other on the other thread so you gotta drag it to other areas... both of you need a time out (or maybe some hot monkey love sex to work the tension out)

http://www.collarchat.com/m_1120349/tm.htm

< Message edited by MstrssPassion -- 7/3/2007 8:39:26 AM >

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MstrssPassion

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RE: "Do terrible experiences make for terrible peo... - 7/3/2007 8:39:35 AM

imthatacheyouhav

Posts: 1259
Joined: 4/16/2007
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quote:

ORIGINAL: mstrjx

I think it would be difficult to come across a man who, in some way shape or form, isn't one of those to begin with. I try to stray away from all of those to begin with, and for the better part I succeed. You don't see the thread running loose in here where my name gets bandied by the malcontect.

But you can't avoid the inevitable. A old saw goes something like this..... "There's two kinds of people in the world. There are assholes, and then there are those people who are assholes and just don't know it (or admit to it)."

Which one are you?

Jeff

Wow...i couldn't disagree more with this awful generalization.

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(in reply to mstrjx)

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RE: "Do terrible experiences make for terrible peo... - 7/3/2007 8:44:33 AM

becca333

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Joined: 4/11/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: MstrssPassion

oh good grief charlie brown... ya'll didn't toss enough at each other on the other thread so you gotta drag it to other areas... both of you need a time out (or maybe some hot monkey love sex to work the tension out)

http://www.collarchat.com/m_1120349/tm.htm

Quite possibly. But oh dear god most definitely not with each other.

(in reply to MstrssPassion)

Post #: 14

RE: "Do terrible experiences make for terrible peo... - 7/3/2007 8:45:14 AM

LaTigresse

Posts: 26123
Joined: 1/15/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: MadRabbit

New topic of discussion...

Do you think that one day a story that is told here regarding a negative experience with a male Dom will go without a post automatically ruling that he is in fact an asshole, a cheating bastard, a predator, a fake, a wannabe, or a HNG?

Perhaps, if they are entirely focused upon internet interaction. However I think if a person is involved in getting out and meeting people, getting to know them, establishing a personal reputation, then one person's negativity will have very little impact.

All of the internet communication in the world is still no substitute for spending physical time with people.

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RE: "Do terrible experiences make for terrible peo... - 7/3/2007 8:47:08 AM

becca333

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Joined: 4/11/2006
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quote:

ORIGINAL: LaTigresse

All of the internet communication in the world is still no substitute for spending physical time with people.

Very true - there's no substitute for r/l experience.

(in reply to LaTigresse)

Post #: 16

RE: "Do terrible experiences make for terrible peo... - 7/3/2007 8:50:25 AM

MstrssPassion

Posts: 2444
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: West Palm Beach, FL
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quote:

ORIGINAL: becca333

quote:

ORIGINAL: MstrssPassion

oh good grief charlie brown... ya'll didn't toss enough at each other on the other thread so you gotta drag it to other areas... both of you need a time out (or maybe some hot monkey love sex to work the tension out)

http://www.collarchat.com/m_1120349/tm.htm

Quite possibly. But oh dear god most definitely not with each other.

yes... with each other...

you're already having a go at each other like an old married couple, might as well consummate the misery

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MstrssPassion

(in reply to becca333)

Post #: 17

RE: "Do terrible experiences make for terrible peo... - 7/3/2007 8:50:47 AM

slaveish

Posts: 1086
Joined: 2/19/2007
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: MadRabbit

New topic of discussion...

Do you think that one day a story that is told here regarding a negative experience with a male Dom will go without a post automatically ruling that he is in fact an asshole, a cheating bastard, a predator, a fake, a wannabe, or a HNG?

A whole thread without one? Nope. Unless the OP is determined to be a troll. ~ever helpful~

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You only lose what you cling to. ~~Gautama Sidharta

If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other. ~~Mother Teresa

(in reply to MadRabbit)

Post #: 18

RE: "Do terrible experiences make for terrible peo... - 7/3/2007 9:00:34 AM

charmdpetKeira

Posts: 916
Joined: 6/2/2007
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quote:

Do you think that one day a story that is told here regarding a negative experience with a male Dom will go without a post automatically ruling that he is in fact an asshole, a cheating bastard, a predator, a fake, a wannabe, or a HNG?

It would depend on:

How the story is told, by the person doing the telling.
Who reads the story, and how they interpret it.
What the story is about.

The reason for such responses, is the same for any “automatic” response; emotions based on personal experience. So, until everyone learns to drop their emotions when making such judgments… the answer is no.

Bright side; no one person nor group is exempt from such judgment.

Sincerely,

k

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Life is tough, that does not mean it isn't fair.

There is no wrong choice, only consequence.

(in reply to MadRabbit)

Post #: 19

RE: "Do terrible experiences make for terrible peo... - 7/3/2007 9:09:28 AM

MstrssPassion

Posts: 2444
Joined: 1/1/2004
From: West Palm Beach, FL
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quote:

ORIGINAL: MadRabbit

New topic of discussion...

Do you think that one day a story that is told here regarding a negative experience with a male Dom will go without a post automatically ruling that he is in fact an asshole, a cheating bastard, a predator, a fake, a wannabe, or a HNG?

Or that the female dominant is not a gold digging whore who has no employment skills & feeds of unsuspecting innocent men that simply wish to find their One....

The only two ways that these types of rash judgments calls are going stop happening...

1) all fakes, HNG's, trolls, predators, lying, cheating, gold digging whores, bad people & poo-poo heads disappear forever, never to be seen or heard from again

OR...

2) people stop jumping into situations with people they know nothing about &/or start assuming responsibility & accountability for their stupid faux pas.

Neither of which is likely to happen any time soon... so, best practice... don't participate on thread where people bitch about "someone done somebody wrong"... even with both parties present the facts are never straight... there was one of those on here just yesterday I believe.... two sides of the story offered but they sounded like two entirely different stories. Drama like that is best worked out in IM or face to face... broadcasting it to the masses is tacky.

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MstrssPassion

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