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I need a hug - 7/4/2007 10:36:16 AM

cjenny

Posts: 1736
Joined: 11/27/2006
Status: offline

My best friend. We met jeez, when we there 13. Her son comitted suicide this morning & I can't stop crying.
I keep seeing him 7 years old & playing on his real grown-up drum set to Stevie Ray Vaughn music.
Boy this hurts. Havent been able to reach my friend on the phone understandably. There is nothing I can do to make things better. Thats what Im supposed to do, I always make things better for people and I cant do anything to fix this. Im sorry I just.. had to put this somewhere.

_____________________________

*Unless I cite a source it is MO.

~ ssssh. i think i've just found freedom. ~

Post #: 1

RE: I need a hug - 7/4/2007 10:39:21 AM

SubinMaine

Posts: 1888
Joined: 1/7/2006
Status: offline

*hugs* damn, that sucks....

_____________________________

That which yields is not always weak...

(in reply to cjenny)

Post #: 2

RE: I need a hug - 7/4/2007 10:40:37 AM

mistoferin

Posts: 8284
Joined: 10/27/2004
Status: offline

Oh cjenny I'm so sorry. It is such a helpless feeling but really the only thing you can do is be there for her. There just are no words....

_____________________________

Peace and light,
~erin~

There are no victims here...only volunteers.

When you make a habit of playing on the tracks, you thereby forfeit the right to bitch when you get hit by a train.

"I did it! I admit it and I'm gonna do it again!"

(in reply to cjenny)

Post #: 3

RE: I need a hug - 7/4/2007 10:43:27 AM

angelic

Posts: 1807
Joined: 1/24/2005
Status: offline

Jenny, i am so sorry. Do what you have always done and be her friend... you have my deepest condolences.

_____________________________

~....and once you have tasted flight, you will walk the earth with your eyes turned skyward, for there you have been and there you long to return.~ -- Leonardo de Vinci

(in reply to cjenny)

Post #: 4

RE: I need a hug - 7/4/2007 10:52:58 AM

badgirl64

Posts: 28
Joined: 2/6/2005
Status: offline

Jenny,

Damn! I thought my day sucked!

You have the biggest hug from me! I am so sorry to hear about your friend's son. You and your friend have my deepest sympathy!

Carla

(in reply to angelic)

Post #: 5

RE: I need a hug - 7/4/2007 12:12:43 PM

cjenny

Posts: 1736
Joined: 11/27/2006
Status: offline

Thanks everyone.

I can remember being 22 and thinking my life was over because emotional pain can be so so raw. I wish.. I wish there was a way to let ppl like him know that it truly would pass eventually. I wanna go back in time and tell him that. Cuz 22 is just too damn young.

But thanks. For listening.

_____________________________

*Unless I cite a source it is MO.

~ ssssh. i think i've just found freedom. ~

(in reply to badgirl64)

Post #: 6

RE: I need a hug - 7/4/2007 12:17:06 PM

slaveish

Posts: 1086
Joined: 2/19/2007
Status: offline

How horrible. And on a holiday too. I am very sorry, jenny.

_____________________________

You only lose what you cling to. ~~Gautama Sidharta

If we have no peace, it is because we have forgotten that we belong to each other. ~~Mother Teresa

(in reply to cjenny)

Post #: 7

RE: I need a hug - 7/4/2007 12:30:14 PM

velvetears

Posts: 2933
Joined: 6/19/2006
Status: offline

i can't even fathom the anguish - when we love others, like you do your friend, their pain becomes our pain. She will need you, other friends, family in the months to come - no words can heal or help that kind of grief *hugs* my prayers and chants are with you and your friend.

_____________________________

Religion is for people who are scared of hell, Spirituality is for people who have been there

(in reply to slaveish)

Post #: 8

RE: I need a hug - 7/4/2007 12:49:17 PM

domiguy

Posts: 12952
Joined: 5/2/2006
Status: offline

Cjenny take care of yourself and give whatever comfort is possible to your friend. It is just awful to hear of such news...I hope you are well.

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(in reply to velvetears)

Post #: 9

RE: I need a hug - 7/4/2007 12:54:50 PM

SeeksOnlyOne

Posts: 2012
Joined: 5/14/2007
Status: offline

so sorry hon......the day i was burying my mom, a family came in to make arrangements for burying their 16 yo daughter that had hung her self in her own closet.......

the pain of losing my child is something i dont even want to try to imagine......bless you and your friend.....

_____________________________

it aint no good til it hurts just a little bit....jimmy somerville

in those moments of solitude, does everyone sometimes think they are insane? or is it just me?

(in reply to domiguy)

Post #: 10

RE: I need a hug - 7/4/2007 12:57:00 PM

adoracat

Posts: 1779
Joined: 2/16/2007
Status: offline

i am so sorry, hon. there are no words, only tears for you and for your friend and her family

kitten, who still grieves her own losses

(in reply to SeeksOnlyOne)

Post #: 11

RE: I need a hug - 7/4/2007 12:57:04 PM

Dane

Posts: 25
Joined: 5/12/2007
Status: offline

Your friend will be glad to just have you there. She won't need you to make anything better. You'll make it better by being available... but remember to take care of yourself. Get yourself as many hugs as you're going to be giving out so that you don't become drained. All my best to you and condolences to your friend.

(in reply to domiguy)

Post #: 12

RE: I need a hug - 7/4/2007 1:09:08 PM

SadoCasinero

Posts: 30
Joined: 12/8/2006
Status: offline

So hard..so sorry..*hugs*...another reminder to tell our friends and family how much they mean to us before it's a eulogy.

(in reply to cjenny)

Post #: 13

RE: I need a hug - 7/4/2007 1:21:27 PM

completenz

Posts: 315
Joined: 1/10/2007
Status: offline

oh hon
i am so so sorry this has happened. There is really nothing else i can say except please look after yourself and your friend. Suicide is such a waste, it has touched my life too
biggest heartfelt hug from me
chrissie

(in reply to cjenny)

Post #: 14

RE: I need a hug - 7/4/2007 1:30:31 PM

bandit25

Posts: 3029
Joined: 6/18/2005
Status: offline

So sorry to hear that. Unfortunately, you can't go back in time and, even if you could, he wouldn't listen. When one is young, everything is so intense. Please accept my condolences.

(in reply to cjenny)

Post #: 15

RE: I need a hug - 7/4/2007 1:59:41 PM

stella40

Posts: 417
Joined: 1/11/2006
From: London, UK
Status: offline

In the quiet moments
When the hurt is hard to bear
May love be your shelter,
and the memory of precious moments be your comfort
You are held in gentle thought and prayer.

stella

_____________________________

I try to take one day at a time, but several days come and attack me at once. (Jennifer Unlimited)

If you can't be a good example then you'll just have to be a horrible warning.

(in reply to cjenny)

Post #: 16

RE: I need a hug - 7/4/2007 2:02:22 PM

Craftsman

Posts: 885
Joined: 6/12/2005
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: cjenny

My best friend. We met jeez, when we there 13. Her son comitted suicide this morning & I can't stop crying.
I keep seeing him 7 years old & playing on his real grown-up drum set to Stevie Ray Vaughn music.
Boy this hurts. Havent been able to reach my friend on the phone understandably. There is nothing I can do to make things better. Thats what Im supposed to do, I always make things better for people and I cant do anything to fix this. Im sorry I just.. had to put this somewhere.

---<<<[[[{{{(((cjenny)))}}}]]]>>>---
Just adding my hugs into the mix. At times like this, one cannot have too many, and cyber-hugs are just not as satisfying as the rl ones. Gather many of both kinds, especially the rl ones.

Suicide is such a terrible shock to those of us who are the survivors. It is so hard to avoid the feelings of inadequacy, of having failed the person who commits suicide somehow. At least that's how I have experienced it. My conclusion is that it is no one's fault. It just is. It hurts like hell. There is no Aspirin for that pain.

Don't feel you have to be strong. Cry when you need to, and let your friend cry with you and on your shoulder. That seems to be the best medicine for the pain. If your situation is any way similar to mine, you'll take turns being basket cases, and that's OK, because it lets you both recover, to heal to some extent, and to grow in compassion and understanding.

So much for my pompous soap-boxing.

Take good care of you.
C/

< Message edited by Craftsman -- 7/4/2007 2:04:58 PM >

_____________________________

You do not have to be perfect to be perfect.

(in reply to cjenny)

Post #: 17

RE: I need a hug - 7/4/2007 2:04:33 PM

LadyEllen

Posts: 10931
Joined: 6/30/2006
From: Stourport-England
Status: offline

Jenny, I cant make any of the pain of this go away and cant say anything more than has been said already. Just send a big hug over the waves.

E

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In a test against the leading brand, 9 out of 10 participants couldnt tell the difference. Dumbasses.

(in reply to bandit25)

Post #: 18

RE: I need a hug - 7/4/2007 3:56:18 PM

HaveRopeWillBind

Posts: 514
Joined: 7/15/2006
Status: offline

quote:

ORIGINAL: cjenny

...There is nothing I can do to make things better...

Jenny,
Any chance you can just go and be with her? That's likely what she would need most right now.

(in reply to cjenny)

Post #: 19

RE: I need a hug - 7/4/2007 4:01:16 PM

MistressNoName

Posts: 664
Joined: 10/26/2006
Status: offline

My heart goes out to you, jenny. Please remember to take care of yourself as you try to be there to comfort your friend.

MNN

(in reply to cjenny)

Post #: 20

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