Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

Older gay subs


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master >> Older gay subs Page: [1]
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
Older gay subs - 7/5/2007 11:02:00 AM   
rugbysub


Posts: 14
Joined: 7/2/2007
Status: offline 		i'm an older (41) pretty normal masculine, confident gay guy who is finding it hard to find a 'real' Master who who wants a chunky (from playing rugby) mature sub to use/train/own and I'm not sure whether it becuase of my age, the way i've portrayed myself or whether I'm not of interest to most Masters for some reason.

I;m not sure whether it's my age or the fact i don't come across as overtly submissive or whether its actually more about whats going on in my headin terms of not being able to submit to guys who i don't think can 'master' me in the true sense of the word, but guys who i've met who have said they are Masters and seem to want me have turned out not to be the 'real' thing or have just not been Man or Masterful enough for me to submit to them properly and totally.

It also always seems to me that Masters seemingly prefer younger , slim smooth slaveboi types.

Is the age thing an issue? Are there any 'Real Men' Masters out there who like subs/slaves like me? Am i just not trying the right places? Can any Masters give me guidance on maybe how should project myself better?
Profile   Post #: 1
RE: Older gay subs - 7/5/2007 11:27:44 AM   
MasterFireMaam


Posts: 5587
Joined: 3/1/2006
From: Charleston, WV
Status: offline 		Be warned... you've used the term "real". We're ALL looking for "real".

Have you tried getting out into your local community? Think about posting a picture in your profile, too.

Master Fire


_____________________________

The power of who we are can be intoxicating. The power of who we could be is humbling.
-----
Ms Relationship Books
-----
BDSM How-To Books

(in reply to rugbysub)
Profile   Post #: 2
RE: Older gay subs - 7/5/2007 11:42:48 AM   
rugbysub


Posts: 14
Joined: 7/2/2007
Status: offline 		pictures waiting to be approved at the moment as I've only just joined.
I do get out - I'm not new to the scene at all and go to the SM clubs etc and am pretty sociable when it comes to talking to people , meeting etc

I take your point about the 'real' word, sorry, i think what i was trying to say was that i have come across a fair few guys who have called themselves Masters and then turn out just to be role playing it or getting off on it for the night or do not have the real 'Dominance' to know how to deal with me - if i start feeling like 'i' could actually dominate them fairly easily it kind of loses it a bit for me and i find it hard to continue being that submissive for them.

that make sense at all?

(in reply to MasterFireMaam)
Profile   Post #: 3
RE: Older gay subs - 7/5/2007 12:31:52 PM   
Rover


Posts: 2634
Joined: 6/28/2004
Status: offline 		I'm aghast!!!  Forty-one is "older"???
 
John


_____________________________

"Man's mind stretched to a new idea never goes back to its original dimensions."

Sri da Avabhas

(in reply to rugbysub)
Profile   Post #: 4
RE: Older gay subs - 7/5/2007 12:43:03 PM   
SirMIkeSD


Posts: 613
Joined: 3/16/2007
From: San Diego, Ca
Status: offline 		I don't see 41 as older as I am 47.  You are in the age range I am looking at which is basically between 36 and 50.  In fact I perfer a boy with some meat on his bones, with the small tiny ones I worry that I will break them :-)  It takes time to find the right person, how long have you been looking?  It also looks like you are a bit of a challange, in the beginning it can be hard to determine how far you can go enforcing the domanance.  Have you made clear the limits that a Master can use to bring you under control.

Mike


(in reply to Rover)
Profile   Post #: 5
RE: Older gay subs - 7/5/2007 1:14:42 PM   
Celeste43


Posts: 3066
Joined: 2/4/2006
From: NYS
Status: offline 		Have you looked in your local gay community? I find gay/lesbian power relationships underrepresented on a pansex site such as this.

(in reply to SirMIkeSD)
Profile   Post #: 6
RE: Older gay subs - 7/5/2007 1:18:03 PM   
instynctive


Posts: 2726
Status: offline 		Mmmm.. rugged, sexy, subby, gay..?

Where do I find one of those?




_____________________________


Lifestyle-friendly web hosting and design: http://kinkyqueer.net

(in reply to Celeste43)
Profile   Post #: 7
RE: Older gay subs - 7/5/2007 1:39:38 PM   
rugbysub


Posts: 14
Joined: 7/2/2007
Status: offline 		lol thanks for all the replies - i'm not sure whether i'd be considered a challenge SirMikeSd altho for some maybe - - i usually am pretty clear and upfront and i kind of think that some guys might like the idea of working on a guy they have to 'break' a little - some might think that is considered too much like hard work but then i'm thinking 'think of the benefits afterwards!' ;-)

I know 41 isn't that old and in my mind would seem perfect for someone cos they know their mind better but i do still get the impression that a lot of Masters 'like em younger' if you know what i mean.

Instinctive - rugged, sexy, subby, gay? thats kind what I'm saying so i guess you find em here lol but why does it feel like its so hard to find the guys that want that??

(in reply to instynctive)
Profile   Post #: 8
RE: Older gay subs - 7/5/2007 1:42:31 PM   
rugbysub


Posts: 14
Joined: 7/2/2007
Status: offline 		Oh by the way SirMIkeSD, that is one hell of a good beard Sir

(in reply to rugbysub)
Profile   Post #: 9
RE: Older gay subs - 7/5/2007 3:14:37 PM   
beargonewild


Posts: 22716
Joined: 5/7/2007
Status: offline 		Being a 46 yr old submissive switch, I've found that many Masters/Doms do prefer one who has some years under their belt and with some life experince. So far, I've not found my age to be detrimental at all. Granted we do have more life experience, yet our submissiveness still remains and a Master who is right for you, will see that and will take you as his property. Time and patience is the key.

_____________________________

Do Not Rile da Chosen Bear

Promiscuous boy you already know
That I’m all yours what you waiting for?

Resident MANWHORE ~1000 Bear pts~

10 NZ points
Whips~n~Cuffs

(in reply to rugbysub)
Profile   Post #: 10
RE: Older gay subs - 7/6/2007 12:22:32 AM   
rugbysub


Posts: 14
Joined: 7/2/2007
Status: offline 		Thnx beargonewild - I think i do kind of know that's true really - it's just it doesn't feel that way sometimes - I'll keep searching :-)

(in reply to beargonewild)
Profile   Post #: 11
RE: Older gay subs - 7/6/2007 6:32:22 AM   
SirMIkeSD


Posts: 613
Joined: 3/16/2007
From: San Diego, Ca
Status: offline 		rugbysub,

Thanks for comment on my beard.

Mike


(in reply to rugbysub)
Profile   Post #: 12
RE: Older gay subs - 7/6/2007 10:55:38 AM   
MstrTiger


Posts: 417
Joined: 1/14/2006
From: UK
Status: offline
I think most men of a certain age go for the younger model regardless of their sexuality, it is just the nature of things, you even say in your profile that you yourself get dominant with men much younger than yourself so I think you are in a good position to understand such men’s motivations. I think it can be frustrating not being able to find someone you are totally compatible with though it is difficult thing to do, particularly in the gay community where people tend to be very fickle, and I include myself in that and having looked through your profile I get the impression that you are also of a somewhat similar mindset. I think that if you are going to hunt for someone who fit’s a specific description exactly then you are only going to end up disappointing yourself, you have to learn to understand that people will inevitably have traits that you perceive as faults and that you have faults in their eyes in the same way also. You can live your live looking for the perfect man though the chances of actually finding someone that ticks all the right boxes no matter where you look or how hard is extremely unlikely I think there is always going to be some trait you don’t like or some impracticality that gets in the way, I think you can only find the perfect man by changing yourself or what your perception of the perfect man is, trying to find someone to fill a very specific hole in your life is extremely difficult, I think the best way of doing it is to consider making yourself a little more flexible and forgiving of other peoples imperfections.

< Message edited by MstrTiger -- 7/6/2007 10:59:05 AM >

_____________________________

Visit my website http://www.tigerdom.com

(in reply to SirMIkeSD)
Profile   Post #: 13
RE: Older gay subs - 7/6/2007 11:14:02 AM   
rugbysub


Posts: 14
Joined: 7/2/2007
Status: offline 		I have to agree MstrTiger and knowing you and your posts from other sites I know that you come across as a pretty sorted individual which i think I am too so yes, i think we are of similar mindsets. The Mr Perfect scenario is , I agree, almost a self-fulfilling failure so i agree with what you say and i don;t really think thats what i'm trying to do altho I do believe that there's nothing wrong in trying to find a person and a situation that you feel the most comfortable in - i have to say also that you can have some damn good fun, experiences and learning trying to find that ;-)

Again i gues my original post was just to see whether my thoughts on the subject were in line with others - do appreciate ur comments tho MstrTiger, sound like a cool guy

(in reply to MstrTiger)
Profile   Post #: 14
RE: Older gay subs - 7/6/2007 11:15:10 AM   
rugbysub


Posts: 14
Joined: 7/2/2007
Status: offline 		PS does anyone know how to change the 'vanilla' emoticon? have had a look round the boards and site and unless i'm being a bit dense can't find how to change it

;-)

(in reply to rugbysub)
Profile   Post #: 15
RE: Older gay subs - 7/6/2007 11:15:45 AM   
mnottertail


Posts: 60698
Joined: 11/3/2004
Status: offline 		click on the gold link about icecream at the bottom of my post

< Message edited by mnottertail -- 7/6/2007 11:16:01 AM >

_____________________________

Have they not divided the prey; to every man a damsel or two? Judges 5:30


(in reply to rugbysub)
Profile   Post #: 16
RE: Older gay subs - 7/6/2007 1:19:08 PM   
LotusSong


Posts: 6334
Joined: 7/2/2006
From: Domme Emeritus
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Rover

I'm aghast!!!  Forty-one is "older"???
 
John



Yes, but fear not, it get's younger the older you get :)


_____________________________

Life Lesson #1

I'm not your type.
I'm not inflatable.


(in reply to Rover)
Profile   Post #: 17
RE: Older gay subs - 7/6/2007 1:46:14 PM   
rugbysub


Posts: 14
Joined: 7/2/2007
Status: offline 		lol OK OK I realise that the 41 reference is not exactly 'older' in many people eyes - myself included. I think you must get the jist of what i was trying to ask tho huh?

and lotusSong - it definately does get younger the older you get ;-) :-P

(in reply to LotusSong)
Profile   Post #: 18
RE: Older gay subs - 7/6/2007 11:54:12 PM   
MySweetSubmssive


Posts: 1139
Joined: 2/7/2006
From: Lehigh Valley, PA
Status: offline 		I read your profile.  How does it support your search for a dominant to mention that you are willing/intereted in dominating others?  That piece seems extraneous as best, and sending mixed signals at worst.

Best,
MSS

_____________________________

"Oh, James, you're such a cunning linguist."

--Miss Moneypenny

(in reply to rugbysub)
Profile   Post #: 19
RE: Older gay subs - 7/7/2007 3:43:31 AM   
rugbysub


Posts: 14
Joined: 7/2/2007
Status: offline 		don't think i intend to send mixed signal- i say that i still sometimes have a little dominant tendnacy but only with much yngr lads - if it makes me a switch then i suppose you may be right but it doesn't detract from my desire to be dominated by older Masters -does it?

(in reply to MySweetSubmssive)
Profile   Post #: 20
Page:   [1]
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Master >> Older gay subs Page: [1]
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.109