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RE: Strap-ons and (male) virgins - 7/19/2007 8:47:10 PM   
Hilde360


Posts: 9
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Take him like you never have before.

(in reply to BossyShoeBitch)
Profile   Post #: 61
RE: Strap-ons and (male) virgins - 7/19/2007 8:58:09 PM   
therionokane


Posts: 5
Joined: 7/19/2007
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ok...i'm new here....and i'm not a shrink.. i read all the posts. and in my opinion all of them have valid points to one degree or another. i couldnt pick one to be the best for someone that i dont know.  but i can offer my personal experience. i am 38 . when i was 23 i had a very unique girlfriend . (i'll call her Donna)  Donna was a little older..much more experienced....  and had tastes that i'd never imagined that a girl would have. our sex life was very good. i was somewhat shy...  she made hints...i wasnt sure if she was joking .. i pretended to be sure that she was.  she wanted to "do me" , as she put it. one night , we had drinks. she was very upfront with me. she told me she wanted me buzzed so she could do whatever she wanted with me. and she did. she took my cherry. at first gently with a small viberator. she worked her (or my..) way up until she used a small strapon.

well. we moved apart. (still miss her) and yes , i was kinda left hanging in the satisfaction dept. after that. but....i AM glad it happened. even though it did take me some time to reconciliate what it all meant to me in my own mind . i will say this....did it all work out perfectly...NO , it didnt.  was it morally wrong? i dont know. i dont think so though. she gave me what i wanted...more importantly..what i needed. i'll always remember her...lovingly, respectfully...and gratefully.  

(in reply to michaelOfGeorgia)
Profile   Post #: 62
RE: Strap-ons and (male) virgins - 7/19/2007 9:00:29 PM   
therionokane


Posts: 5
Joined: 7/19/2007
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ok...i'm new here....and i'm not a shrink.. i read all the posts. and in my opinion all of them have valid points to one degree or another. i couldnt pick one to be the best for someone that i dont know.  but i can offer my personal experience. i am 38 . when i was 23 i had a very unique girlfriend . (i'll call her Donna)  Donna was a little older..much more experienced....  and had tastes that i'd never imagined that a girl would have. our sex life was very good. i was somewhat shy...  she made hints...i wasnt sure if she was joking .. i pretended to be sure that she was.  she wanted to "do me" , as she put it. one night , we had drinks. she was very upfront with me. she told me she wanted me buzzed so she could do whatever she wanted with me. and she did. she took my cherry. at first gently with a small viberator. she worked her (or my..) way up until she used a small strapon.

well. we moved apart. (still miss her) and yes , i was kinda left hanging in the satisfaction dept. after that. but....i AM glad it happened. even though it did take me some time to reconciliate what it all meant to me in my own mind . i will say this....did it all work out perfectly...NO , it didnt.  was it morally wrong? i dont know. i dont think so though. she gave me what i wanted...more importantly..what i needed. i'll always remember her...lovingly, respectfully...and gratefully

(in reply to michaelOfGeorgia)
Profile   Post #: 63
RE: Strap-ons and (male) virgins - 7/19/2007 9:02:13 PM   
therionokane


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ooops...sorry about the double post...still new to this.

(in reply to therionokane)
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RE: Strap-ons and (male) virgins - 7/19/2007 11:28:16 PM   
BossyShoeBitch


Posts: 3931
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From: South Florida
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I guess that's why you emailed me the post on the other side too..

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RE: Strap-ons and (male) virgins - 7/20/2007 6:44:27 AM   
fr33rider


Posts: 1
Joined: 7/15/2007
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I wish you could take my flower

Ollie

(in reply to BossyShoeBitch)
Profile   Post #: 66
RE: Strap-ons and (male) virgins - 7/20/2007 7:02:34 AM   
MistressRouge


Posts: 876
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From: Birmingham West Midlands UK
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OOoo take that lil virgin cherry
 
I pop many first time ass virgins, and I must say it is great being their 1st!!
 
Take it, take it

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(in reply to BossyShoeBitch)
Profile   Post #: 67
RE: Strap-ons and (male) virgins - 7/20/2007 8:17:56 AM   
chiaThePet


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quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressRouge

OOoo take that lil virgin cherry
 
I pop many first time ass virgins, and I must say it is great being their 1st!!
 
Take it, take it


Ooooo, if You need help sorting throught all that mail, i'm available.

chia* (the pet) 

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You can stick me in the corner, but I'll probably just end up coloring on the walls.

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RE: Strap-ons and (male) virgins - 7/20/2007 9:50:13 AM   
zzhobie


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Joined: 6/14/2007
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When i had my first experience with a Mistress topping me with a strap on i felt more humiliation and that it was a form of punishment.   Painful and fairly harsh.  i was way over my head and should have had more communication.  A year later i was blessed by a Mistress that showed me a truly sensual part of topping me. Mistress took the time with me and the experience and connection was unbelievable.  My opinion i remember more the first time good experience of being strapped than the first time being penetrated. 
BossyShoeBitch,
If you take him under your wing, i feel he is a very lucky sub and will grow leaps and bounds by a good first experience.

(in reply to chiaThePet)
Profile   Post #: 69
RE: Strap-ons and (male) virgins - 7/20/2007 9:53:38 AM   
solvr70


Posts: 425
Joined: 8/8/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressRouge

OOoo take that lil virgin cherry
 
I pop many first time ass virgins, and I must say it is great being their 1st!!
 
Take it, take it


totally agreeing with You. just do not start with one that is 2 1/2" thick!

that one would have to work up to i'm sure (not quite there yet myself)

soooo...wishing to visit the other side of the pond. thinking there could be a number of "firsts"


(in reply to MistressRouge)
Profile   Post #: 70
RE: Strap-ons and (male) virgins - 7/20/2007 5:47:01 PM   
rick19


Posts: 98
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I am an anal virgin, and I really want to expierence a mind-blowing, satisfying (and safe) strap-on expierence. I don't want to go to a pro-domme for my first time, because there wouldnt be any intimacy, with me giving it up to a stranger....those kind of emotional needs  aren't something that could be bought, imo. Also, I have my whole life to explore and meet Ladies....now if I'm 30 and still an anal virgin, I may consider it, lol


(in reply to submissiveguy69)
Profile   Post #: 71
RE: Strap-ons and (male) virgins - 7/20/2007 7:57:00 PM   
darchChylde


Posts: 5279
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From: Warm Springs, GA but i live in San Francisco.
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i must lead off with the statement that i've not experienced recieving anal sex and at this point it is a hard limit for me.  i'm not sure if it has to do with latent homosexuality or homophobia or just the fact that i don't care for stuff in my butt.  i can't say that i will never want to try a strap-on in the future, but so far i don't even like giving anal sex; though i'm more willing to do that than the other.

With all the stigma attached to recieving anal for men, and social conditioning against sodomy; i think it would be foolish to consider male anal virginity any less of a tramatic or emotional experience than female vaginal virginity.  We're talking about submissive males here, who are generally far more in tune with their emotions than the average; and this is one of the most taboo acts for a straight male to participate in, there are some serious boundaries to cross there.  i doubt any male goes into this activity the first time lightly.  Also, one must consider the pain involved; no matter the lubrication, build up over time, i cannot imagine this activity being without intense physical pain for the first time even though there may be pleasure involved too.

Now for your question.  The submissive in question has, in you, a Dominant woman who he trusts and likes; and who obviously cares for him and is attracted to him.  Who better to bring him into the "joys of anal sex"?  Whatever his reasons, he wants to share this special moment in his life with you.  Why not accept the gift of pleasure that this is?  You may not see him as a potential submissive, but it's possible that you may grow to.  If not, so long as it is understood that this is not a long-term monogamous relationship, where's the harm?

You worry about his gift of virginity to a hypothetical future Dominant, and this says a great deal about the consideration you show this submissive.  But, i believe that a Dominant woman will already be hard-pressed to find a straight male interested in and willing to recieve anal that has not already tried it.  If this is such a major issue with the invisible woman, then perhaps this is a woman who does not deserve him.  Your friend does not have a Dominant, so his virginity is his and nobody else's; it is up to him to decide who he wishes to share it with.

Go ahead and fuck your friend, have a good time and show him a good time. There are only two people here who can decide
this or has a say in it at all, and none of them are the Invisible Dominant.


_____________________________

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if only to keep me to herself.

I'm a male dominant switch whose experienced as a poly sub to a dominant woman
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Where the fuck do I post?

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(in reply to switchsecrets)
Profile   Post #: 72
RE: Strap-ons and (male) virgins - 7/20/2007 8:15:39 PM   
BossyShoeBitch


Posts: 3931
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From: South Florida
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Thank you darchChylde..  I appreciate what you had to say.

Ummm.. aren't you supposed to be writing something else?

_____________________________

A clever man can get out of situations a wise man never gets into...
A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.

(in reply to darchChylde)
Profile   Post #: 73
RE: Strap-ons and (male) virgins - 7/21/2007 3:12:40 PM   
IvyMorgan


Posts: 729
Joined: 7/5/2007
From: Midlands, UK
Status: offline
I've got/had a few "issues" with sex/intimacy, long back story, not very interesting, but the relevent point is that, I found a friend who I could trust, and who agreed, in a no-strings-for-either-of-us way, to try some things out with me.

I felt safe enough to be able to enjoy things I was actually pretty scared about.  Because of the set-up of the relationship with him.

Just my tuppance.

(in reply to BossyShoeBitch)
Profile   Post #: 74
RE: Strap-ons and (male) virgins - 7/21/2007 4:45:21 PM   
goddessAVA


Posts: 221
Joined: 11/2/2006
Status: offline
My approach to anal play is based on the way I was introduced to it.  I had not really thought about it but my boyfriend at the time, who was outrageoulsy good in bed, started discussing it with me.  He was a master at it, we started so slow with lots of stimulation, and trust me he was 3X the size of the dildos I use most, and before I knew it I had THE most intense orgasm.  Unlike many friends who did not start out with someone who was so expert, I love it to this day.  After that, I kinda saw myself as a preacher for the anal enjoyment-I want men to understand the pleasure it can bring-if it feels good to me and I do not have a prostate, I want it to feel good to them.

As I progress in my bdsm desires, I must admit the rape/no pleasure scenarario is becoming more intriguing-having it done as power, not sensually-I discussed this with a pain slut recently.  

I guess my point is, if done properly, anyone can come to enjoy it.


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cleaning out America's assholes one at a time

(in reply to BossyShoeBitch)
Profile   Post #: 75
RE: Strap-ons and (male) virgins - 7/21/2007 10:10:26 PM   
hardbodysub


Posts: 1654
Joined: 8/7/2005
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quote:

ORIGINAL: BossyShoeBitch

quote:

ORIGINAL: hardbodysub


quote:

ORIGINAL: BossyShoeBitch

OK.. Maybe it's time for a bit of backstory here.. I really didn't mean to come off as a heartless bitch..lol!

This particular sub is someone I have known for about 8 months (he is the person I have to thank for telling me about CM) and although we have "chemistry" together,  we are probably not a good D/s match for each other. 
So we talk to each other every now and then about this and that... Eventually we get to talking about how his search for a Mistress is going (usually not going well).  So today, we were having the same such conversation and he was telling me how several of the Mistresses he has been interested in were very adament about anal/ strap-on play..
So I told him that I would be happy to "break him in" and he seemed fairly into the idea.  (He is fairly easy on the eyes and if I am being honest, I have wanted to "play" with him for quite a long time.)  If he asked me to use him after that, I would be only too happy to do so.  In the vanilla world, this sub could pick up a new girl every day of the week if he chose too.  
So I told Michael about this chat and of course he just had to bring up the morality of it (grrr).. which of course led me to start this thread...


I think the breaking in idea is a good one, as long as both of you are OK with it. Hell, after reading all this stuff, I might even be interested in being "broken in" by you!


I peeked at your profile.  Hop on a plane.  I'll be waiting..


I've seen your profile, too, and that is a very enticing invitation! I think I'm going to have to send you a private email.

(in reply to BossyShoeBitch)
Profile   Post #: 76
RE: Strap-ons and (male) virgins - 7/22/2007 3:44:58 PM   
cabana777


Posts: 1
Joined: 8/16/2006
From: Chicago, IL
Status: offline
I'd love to talk to a domme that wants to take it from me...

(in reply to hardbodysub)
Profile   Post #: 77
RE: Strap-ons and (male) virgins - 7/23/2007 10:07:13 AM   
solvr70


Posts: 425
Joined: 8/8/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: BossyShoeBitch

I had an interesting converstation with a submissive today about how difficult it is for a male sub to find a Mistress to serve (given the sheer imbalance of the male/female numbers in the lifestyle).  Somehow  the subject of strap ons came up.  He is someone who has never  engaged in any type of anal play but is fast coming to the conclusion that he may have to change his mind and submit to a strap on in order to please his Mistress.

Now, he is not my submissive and I don't forsee him ever becoming so, but there is chemistry there..  But we did discuss my taking his virginity since we do know each other and he knows I am not cruel or sadistic. (He is not a pain puppy).

My question is this:  If he does indeed plan to submit to a strap on with a future Mistress, would my taking his virginity somehow be "morally" wrong?  Virginity is quite often a cherished thing and maybe his virginity is not mine to take but belongs to someone he hasn't met yet?

I would love to hear whatever thoughts and opinions you have.  Thank you.


does sound like W/we have a number of interests in common m'Lady *s* do still remember my first time like it was yesterday. was very apprehensive about it, now i've never said "enough", even the couple of times when strapon play was hours long...

(in reply to BossyShoeBitch)
Profile   Post #: 78
RE: Strap-ons and (male) virgins - 7/24/2007 2:32:20 AM   
interestingtimes


Posts: 57
Joined: 5/14/2007
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Well there might be a que for that plane ....

(in reply to BossyShoeBitch)
Profile   Post #: 79
RE: Strap-ons and (male) virgins - 7/25/2007 6:28:57 AM   
StrictlyPandora


Posts: 4
Joined: 7/15/2007
Status: offline
michaelofGeorgia, that just doesn't make sense. The anus is an area of concentrated nerve endings, making it potentially physically pleasurable, and it is also an area of concentrated taboo, making it potentially emotionally pleasurable. If simply enjoying pleasure means you're subconsciously gay, then by all means that theory is true. ;-) (ironic tone)

Maybe "undergoing" anal play with a strap-on allows a male to enjoy a forbidden gay fantasy. Would you begrudge yourself that?

_____________________________

Name not the well from which you will never drink.

(in reply to michaelOfGeorgia)
Profile   Post #: 80
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