RE: Demanding Submissive Profiles?

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AquaticSub -> RE: Demanding Submissive Profiles? (7/19/2007 9:16:43 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Mistressor I've also found that after speaking to a slave/sub for a little while, and realising that they are not what I seek, how quickly they become abusive when I POLITELY advise them that I choose not to collar them. I have had a number of "fuck you bitch" type replies. Makes you wonder how they would react in person doesn't it? And subs get a *LOT* of that from so-called masters. Hell I get it even though I'm owned, say it clearly in my profile and my owner is in my picture. It's not orientation - it's people. There are assholes in every walk of life.

MistressDolly -> RE: Demanding Submissive Profiles? (7/19/2007 9:33:38 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SirDraco7 I'm just basically wondering if a submissive/slave who has a demanding profile actually really submissive? Are they a submissive who would most likely top from the bottom? And please don't get me wrong, I understand why it's needed in some cases. Mostly idiot single males who don't read or are not respectful, or couples with an idiot male, or 'females' who are actually idiot males behind the computer are the cause of such. Yes, there are more causes than men, but they/we are the main cause. It's not always the fact that it's demanding, it's more the tone if anyone can understand what I mean here. Asking for a picture to be included is fair if you have one posted. Asking for set ages, or locations, or even saying 'no men' is understandable as well. But can't such be done and said without being demanding? is it really needed? is it respectful? I have seen countless profiles of demanding subs. Again, it's all in the tone. You could easily change them from sub to Dom and actually see the profile fitting better type of thing. And why is such seemingly more and more commonplace? is it ok for a sub to be Dom-like in their profile?(I'm trying to be gender neutral here btw, apologies if I slip up here or there) And then... About those who follow the rules and orders placed down. Does their replies Make them any less of a Dom? Does it start the potential 'relationship' off on a wrong foot if she's aggressive and demanding and he's defensive and doing what he's told too so he can get to step two or three? I'm just wondering if anyone has noticed this and thought about such like I have, and I was wondering about people's opinions about it as well. curiously thoughtful Sir Draco I don't think it is their intent to appear "demanding". Women, by nature, are typically more selective and discriminating, and when you combine that with supply and demand, it seems natural their profile list of needs, preferences, etc appear quite long.

SubinMaine -> RE: Demanding Submissive Profiles? (7/19/2007 9:40:57 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: GhitaAmati quote: ORIGINAL: SubinMaine Well, then, i guess i'm going to "submissive hell"....lol. What fun could it possibly be for a Dominant personality to dominate a person with no backbone or personal thoughts/preferences...wouldn't that be like Domming a wet dish rag? Kind of makes me happy i'm not "looking" smile....but then, my profile has been approved by Sir and He is the only one i really need to worry about so.... B, I think you misunderstood what I was saying. I am all for a sub stating her expectations before entering into any relationship. This is afterall a consensual thing we practice and what the hell is the point in doing something if both parties arent enjoying themselves and getting their desires met. All I meant to say is that sometimes its better to demand what we DO want than to use our entire profile to demand what we DONT. Makes for an easier read for the most part. anyway...might I direct you to my signature line...Ill meet you in subbie hell. Ooops, my apologies there Ghita, my post wasn't really directed to anyone person in particular, i didn't even realize it was going to automatically reply to you grin edited to add and for the record i do agree with what you said about stating things that you are looking for rather than what you are not :) Seems i can't follow my own belief structure on that though heh [:D]

Anarrus -> RE: Demanding Submissive Profiles? (7/19/2007 10:20:15 AM)
If I see a sub or slave profile that's populated by too many "I want" "I need" "you must" "me", etc. then I simply pass her by with no offense taken and no malice thought of, nor directed. Actually I'm grateful that her profile saved me the time and thoughts I'd spend writing her a message. Lotsa different fish in the sea...move along now ...move along. Anarrus

SubinMaine -> RE: Demanding Submissive Profiles? (7/19/2007 10:29:05 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Anarrus Lotsa different fish in the sea...move along now ...move along. EXACTLY....and, of course, in all fairness, this works for the sub/slave as well.... Lotsa different fish in the sea...move along now...move along. [;)] To each their own...just like there are some Dominants out there that want the groveling, there are also Dominants out there that don't want the groveling...at least not until they are firmly established in a relationship. Now...Anarrus...hypothetical question...if you came across a sub's profile that stated the following: i want to serve, i need to serve, my image of a perfect Master is one who must allow me to be at His beck and call, one who must let me submit, one who must fulfill me by allowing me these things and, in return recieve that which He desires most, an obedient, attentive and maleable submissive. Would you just "pass them by"? (of course i'm being difficult here, but i'm bored right now and can't seem to turn my brain off)...don't take it personal [:D] Just my thoughts

GhitaAmati -> RE: Demanding Submissive Profiles? (7/19/2007 10:39:33 AM)
B, Im glad you asked this, because its something Ive been wondering for a little while now too. Do most Doms really want someone to respond to the question "what do you want in life" by saying "whatever pleases you Master". To me honestly, if someone asks me a specific question, they want a specific answer. If Sir asks me where I want to go to dinner tonight Im gonna tell him the name of a specific resteraunt. He may choose to go somewhere else anyway, but I answered him specifically. Just like if I am asked to describe what I want in a Master/Sir/Dom/Top whatever I am looking for. There are alot of subs out there looking for different things. If they all said "I wanna do whatever pleases you" how would you know which one was a good match for you? If everytime Sir asked me what I want, or what my opinion was on something, I answered with "whatever you want or think is fine" Id be out the door in no time. He may not agree with what I say, he may choose to tell me to do something else compleatly, but he wants to know my thoughts and opinions, even if the only reason he wants to know is so he can do the total opposite....

SubinMaine -> RE: Demanding Submissive Profiles? (7/19/2007 10:43:54 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: GhitaAmati B, Im glad you asked this, because its something Ive been wondering for a little while now too. Do most Doms really want someone to respond to the question "what do you want in life" by saying "whatever pleases you Master". Which brings me back to the "wet dishrag" comparison...honestly, i'd think a Dom would want to dominate someone who has a brain and is CAPABLE of making clear, concise thoughts and expressions. Not someone who never has a personal opinion...wouldn't be much fun for them in my eyes...now, of course, i'm talking having a brain, not being so difficult as to earn the label insubordinate [;)] edited for typo

GhitaAmati -> RE: Demanding Submissive Profiles? (7/19/2007 10:50:38 AM)
There is a definante difference between having a brain and being bratty. Sir enjoys that we can have actual conversations about things in life. If I knelt in the corner all day with a glazed look on my face repeating "whatever pleases you master" he's get bored with me rather quickly. I sometimes wonder if the desire for a mindless slave isnt a result of fantasy books. While Im sure it would be fun to use one of them "fuckdoll" slaves for a night, would someone really want one as a permenant part of their household? That being said..im taking applications for a live in slave with no expectations of anything other than getting to do my dishes and laundry....it would be great if she was slightly attractive.....

Mystique567 -> RE: Demanding Submissive Profiles? (7/19/2007 10:58:04 AM)
I think I have a forceful profile, I do this because I am not a doormat, I do deserve respect and so often do not get it from the people who message me. It gets frustrating to get mail that is how they would like you to serve them and either a naked picture of them or some woman in the position they want to put you in. When you do message then asking why they would think you would want to see or hear that, you get a flaming email about how "not submissive" you are. CLICK BLOCK So I do have a forceful profile, hopefully to find someone strong enough and respectful enough to be my Master.

SubinMaine -> RE: Demanding Submissive Profiles? (7/19/2007 11:07:07 AM)
Good on you Mystique! smile i'll admit it, my profile is a bit on the "bitchy" side and very, VERY up front. This stemmed from the numerous "bow now before me slave" (um...read my profile, i'm not a slave), or "send me naked pictures and I'll consider you" (um...read my profile, i'm not on the market for "consideration") or the ever popular "I'll show you what a REAL Master is like"....Ack! i could only take so much...needless to say, the only Dom/mes that approach me now are ones that are appreciative of a brain and really are looking for simple friendships. EXACTLY what i was hoping it would do...it's a win-win [8D]

Anarrus -> RE: Demanding Submissive Profiles? (7/19/2007 11:08:58 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SubinMaine quote: ORIGINAL: Anarrus Lotsa different fish in the sea...move along now ...move along. EXACTLY....and, of course, in all fairness, this works for the sub/slave as well.... Lotsa different fish in the sea...move along now...move along. [;)] To each their own...just like there are some Dominants out there that want the groveling, there are also Dominants out there that don't want the groveling...at least not until they are firmly established in a relationship. Now...Anarrus...hypothetical question...if you came across a sub's profile that stated the following: i want to serve, i need to serve, my image of a perfect Master is one who must allow me to be at His beck and call, one who must let me submit, one who must fulfill me by allowing me these things and, in return recieve that which He desires most, an obedient, attentive and maleable submissive. Would you just "pass them by"? (of course i'm being difficult here, but i'm bored right now and can't seem to turn my brain off)...don't take it personal [:D] Just my thoughts Thanks.... This brought a smile to my face. Hypothetically....of course not. Read and taken in the context as written, hypothetically, I'd think she'd be worth further exploration. I hope my answer's helped with your boredom at least a little. Anarrus

SubinMaine -> RE: Demanding Submissive Profiles? (7/19/2007 11:13:18 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Anarrus Thanks.... This brought a smile to my face. Hypothetically....of course not. Read and taken in the context as written, hypothetically, I'd think she'd be worth further exploration. I hope my answer's helped with your boredom at least a little. Anarrus Hooray! You have a good sense of humor...thank You for taking my post in the lighthearted way it was meant smile And, yes, You DID help with my boredom....ooo look...something shiny.....[;)]

GhitaAmati -> RE: Demanding Submissive Profiles? (7/19/2007 11:16:40 AM)
im considering painting my tits with glitter just for B.... oops..sorry for that hijack....

SubinMaine -> RE: Demanding Submissive Profiles? (7/19/2007 11:19:04 AM)
quote: ORIGINAL: GhitaAmati im considering painting my tits with glitter just for B.... oops..sorry for that hijack.... PERK...now THAT would definitely help with my boredom! [;)][:D]

SirDraco7 -> RE: Demanding Submissive Profiles? (7/19/2007 3:59:12 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: GhitaAmati B, Im glad you asked this, because its something Ive been wondering for a little while now too. Do most Doms really want someone to respond to the question "what do you want in life" by saying "whatever pleases you Master". Personally I do not. I want, desire and seek a girl who is her own self. Who has her own thoughts desires wants and needs. Robots are so boring and unacceptable to me. Would it be so wrong to say: "What pleases me is for you to be yourself and not a robot?" :)

GhitaAmati -> RE: Demanding Submissive Profiles? (7/19/2007 4:06:56 PM)
I dont think that would be wrong at all to say...and I think it would help things if more of the top types said it.

PrincessEllie -> RE: Demanding Submissive Profiles? (7/19/2007 4:07:50 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: BitaTruble I think the vast majority are probably submissives who seek compatibility and aren't willing to submit to just any Tom, Dick or hairy who comes along. If a particular profile doesn't appeal to you, move on to the next one. No harm, no foul and consider just how much time you've saved yourself by skipping over someone with whom you have no compatibility rather than wasting all that time only to find it out later. This is exactly the mindset I take. And I have to admit I've had enough bullshit out of people here to have my profile a bit edgy and demanding.

SirDraco7 -> RE: Demanding Submissive Profiles? (7/19/2007 4:08:08 PM)
Ok I'd like to thank everyone who replied to this with their thoughts and opinions. I'd like to Note that I do not think that submissives who speak what they seek and desire are bad. Actually I LIKE and Enjoy seeing profiles of submissives who say what they look for and seek. So just because someone knows what they desire, and they voice their desire, it does not make them have a bad profile in my eyes. Nor Do I think a submissive should submit to everyone, or Anyone in fact unless he or she chooses so. But Respect? My origional post was intended for and about profiles that voice their needs and desires in a negative or sometimes hostile way. As some have pointed out, it's not what is said, it is HOW such is said. Just explaining my first post more, so hopefully it is better understood.

themischievous1 -> RE: Demanding Submissive Profiles? (7/19/2007 7:07:24 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: SirDraco7 is it ok for a sub to be Dom-like in their profile? About those who follow the rules and orders placed down. Does their replies Make them any less of a Dom? Does it start the potential 'relationship' off on a wrong foot if she's aggressive and demanding and he's defensive and doing what he's told too so he can get to step two or three? The only reason I changed my profile from submissive to switch is because I got fed up with the sterotypical notions and expectations of what a sub/dom should be like. As someone who just doesn't fit into the boxes that other people design as definitions for these labels, I got sick and tired of being told that "I wasn't really a submissive because I have the personality traits of a dominant," or "You're not submissive enough, you should be a dom instead." Often I remember thinking to myself that if the people who were telling me this crap were any kind of credibly strong dominant people to begin with, they wouldn't have been intimidated by how "aggressive and strong" I was as a submissive. Phffffttttt.... I became very frustrated with all of the labeling and the expectations and I solved the whole damn problem by changing my label to switch. Now I can be who I want to be, however I want to be, without having to fit into someone else's box. The only problem I've got now is attempting to overcome all the ridiculous sterotypical notions various people have about switches. At any rate, it's always something, right?!! [:D]

themischievous1 -> RE: Demanding Submissive Profiles? (7/19/2007 7:13:26 PM)
quote: ORIGINAL: Rastimmipitwax Pfft, if a "submissive" does not know how to write in a manner that does not come off as Dominant, it is pretty obvious that they have a very strong personality that is going to take a lot of work to Dominate. If you don't think you can handle that, move on, a real Dom/me will come along soon enough who has what it takes. Omg...that was a mouthful. You savvy really well, bud. And I agree one hundred percent. [;)]

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