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RE: Lack of Replies? - 7/19/2007 12:49:44 PM   
littleone35


Posts: 2828
Joined: 2/17/2005
Status: offline 		I know you probley don't want to hear this but takes time ans paitence to find a good woman or man for that instance.

Matt's littleone

(in reply to MistressDaisy73)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Lack of Replies? - 7/19/2007 7:01:32 PM   
sub7boy


Posts: 9
Joined: 5/15/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: MistressDaisy73

I think I have seen this complaint about, oh lets see... over a thousand times. I also see complaints "dissing" people who write in their profiles something like "if you msg me, please have more than one sentance" or "if you email me, please be able to constuct a proper sentence", etc.

Personally, I WOULD say that in my profile, but I like to stay on friendlier footing. :) (Just call me Mistress Daisy, the friendly Domme) SO, I say none of that in my profile, and I get barely coherant one sentance emails from subs asking if I am interested. I used to reply to almost every email, regardless and just say "no thanks" but, here are my reasons I don't do that anymore:

As someone already pointed out, that often gives a person the opportunity to say "why not" or otherwise continue an unwanted exchange.


Thanks MistressDaisy73
And as for those who write in their profile "if you contact me be able to contsruct a sentance" I can't say I blame them in the slightest.

My peeve is not that people do not respond to poorly written emails: rather that no matter how polite and articulate you are, there are swathes of women who will simply ignore you. Which is just plain rude.

(in reply to MistressDaisy73)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Lack of Replies? - 7/19/2007 8:24:49 PM   
Mystique567


Posts: 273
Joined: 6/11/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sub7boy


The replay rate I have had so far from women on BDSM sites is around 20%. And that 20% is by and large from women who - no offense to them - are out of my league. Honestly I'm not looking for a supermodel here, just someone I could be compatible with, and with an intelligence level at least equal to mine.

What does it take to find a decent woman these days!?



Wow, I think I was just offended for the 20% the women who are not in your league

(in reply to sub7boy)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Lack of Replies? - 7/20/2007 4:09:02 AM   
maledave7


Posts: 142
Joined: 8/4/2006
Status: offline 		It takes time to find someone. I have sent out a few emails with no replies. I have learned some things that will grab a woman’s attention. Reading all of the woman’s profile is a good thing. You can learn a lot in what a woman has written in her journal too. I find something in it to write to her about and ask her a question about it. When I act like a gentleman and sent her an email, many times she will sent me a reply.

(in reply to sub7boy)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Lack of Replies? - 7/20/2007 4:20:37 AM   
sub7boy


Posts: 9
Joined: 5/15/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Mystique567

quote:

ORIGINAL: sub7boy


The replay rate I have had so far from women on BDSM sites is around 20%. And that 20% is by and large from women who - no offense to them - are out of my league. Honestly I'm not looking for a supermodel here, just someone I could be compatible with, and with an intelligence level at least equal to mine.

What does it take to find a decent woman these days!?



Wow, I think I was just offended for the 20% the women who are not in your league


Sorry. Sometimes it can't be avoided.

(in reply to Mystique567)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Lack of Replies? - 7/20/2007 5:42:52 AM   
ripples


Posts: 31
Joined: 7/4/2007
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sub7boy
Sorry. Sometimes it can't be avoided.


Judging by your posts and your profile, I think there's going to be an awful lot of women out of your league.

(in reply to sub7boy)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Lack of Replies? - 7/24/2007 7:12:20 PM   
Mystique567


Posts: 273
Joined: 6/11/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: ripples

quote:

ORIGINAL: sub7boy
Sorry. Sometimes it can't be avoided.


Judging by your posts and your profile, I think there's going to be an awful lot of women out of your league.



Yes being rude and offensive can always be avoided, sometimes it just means you don't get an answer

(in reply to ripples)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Lack of Replies? - 7/24/2007 9:34:04 PM   
Feliw


Posts: 32
Joined: 4/1/2007
From: Panama
Status: offline 		as a personal experience, since the first day i registered in collarme, i sent about 30 emails per week, really long and dedicated ones, some have like two paragraphs, and i just got 10 replies aprox.  Its really sad, make me think that all the effort i put on the mail is no use, and is multiplied since my first lenguage is spanish and i am learning english.

But well, in the moment i made the email i know that they maybe ignore me cause i live so damn far from everyone.

(in reply to Mystique567)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Lack of Replies? - 7/24/2007 9:49:19 PM   
SexyRed


Posts: 529
Joined: 8/19/2004
Status: offline 		You know why there are a lack of replies? Because women like me get a ton of emails. 90% of them are unintelligible, or just say:
-Hi
- ou are hot!
-Nice hair
-Great smile
-Great tits
- nice profile
- got anymore pics? (I have 4) and usually they have NO photo
- tell me about yourself (if my profile was any longer I would have to have perfect bound) and they have NO profile written
- how long in lifestyle
- what do you want in a Dom
- limits?
- where in NJ are you at
- relocate?
- will you switch
- Hi Ma'am


and so on...

the worst thing is even if the reply seems genuine and reads well, and they seem to actually have read the profile, invariably the guy is either married, has a girlfriend, too far away, wrong kinks, not my type or just disappears.

therefore, while I like to say thanks to everyone who writes, it does get downright annoying and a waste of time to even offer a courteous reply.

< Message edited by SexyRed -- 7/24/2007 9:51:54 PM >

_____________________________

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(in reply to Feliw)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Lack of Replies? - 7/24/2007 9:57:29 PM   
Feliw


Posts: 32
Joined: 4/1/2007
From: Panama
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: SexyRed

You know why there are a lack of replies? Because women like me get a ton of emails. 90% of them are unintelligible, or just say:
-Hi
- ou are hot!
-Nice hair
-Great smile
-Great tits
- nice profile
- got anymore pics? (I have 4) and usually they have NO photo
- tell me about yourself (if my profile was any longer I would have to have perfect bound) and they have NO profile written
- how long in lifestyle
- what do you want in a Dom
- limits?
- where in NJ are you at
- relocate?
- will you switch
- Hi Ma'am


and so on...

the worst thing is even if the reply seems genuine and reads well, and they seem to actually have read the profile, invariably the guy is either married, has a girlfriend, too far away, wrong kinks, not my type or just disappears.

therefore, while I like to say thanks to everyone who writes, it does get downright annoying and a waste of time to even offer a courteous reply.


Well, that some usefull info i will consider before mesaging someone.

(in reply to SexyRed)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Lack of Replies? - 7/24/2007 10:15:51 PM   
leatherorlace


Posts: 215
Joined: 2/21/2005
Status: offline 		HEXZACTLY! I suspect hat this boidawg is seeking another or fresher fantasy for masturbatory fodder.
Gentry

_____________________________

M. Gentry
Doctor of Delicious Deviance
Pope of Perverse Practices
Archbishop of Santorum Production
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Intergalactic Hero of Great Renown

(in reply to ripples)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Lack of Replies? - 7/25/2007 7:18:48 AM   
dawntreader


Posts: 3045
Joined: 11/23/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: sub7boy

I see a lot of complaints from women in the online BDSM world that the men that message them are not genuine, or are simply looking for a quick fling.

I sympathise with the problem, and with the complaints, but also see that very few women in the online communities are willing to make much effort to change this. If you do find a message from a genuine guy, it doesn't take long to write back "thanks for your message, but you are not what I'm looking for right now" or "thanks for you message, lets chat" but instead it seems that if you are a male who is genuinely interested in BDSM, you will be ignored by women no matter what.

The replay rate I have had so far from women on BDSM sites is around 20%. And that 20% is by and large from women who - no offense to them - are out of my league. Honestly I'm not looking for a supermodel here, just someone I could be compatible with, and with an intelligence level at least equal to mine.

What does it take to find a decent woman these days!?


This rant is like so many others... but to the OP i would say - if you are looking for a partner/hook-up, post a picture. You are most likely sending messages to submissives that have photos up, so do the same. And before retorting about a fear of posting  a picture, i will say you can certainly send one with your first c-mail to a girl.
 
In regards to finding a "decent" girl, based on Webster's definition, i would suggest that what you find decent would be subjective to your opinion ~

_____________________________

It is choice - not chance - that determines our destiny~
Jean Nidetch

There is a war going on for your mind...if you are thinking, you are winning~
Flobots

(in reply to sub7boy)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Lack of Replies? - 7/25/2007 8:42:14 AM   
MisPandora


Posts: 2911
Joined: 4/7/2004
From: Philadelphia, PA
Status: offline 		I'd be responding to, on average, 10+ emails a day on here if I were to do as you suggest, 99% of which were one liners, foreigners, or folks significantly outside of my stated parameters.  Why answer those who shouldn't have written in the first place if I've made it SO UTTERLY CLEAR what I seek.  My bottom line is that if you respect me and don't waste my time, pay attention, read, and do what's asked of you, you'll garner a reply whether I like you or not.

_____________________________

Pandora
Ms World Leather 2004
Ms Philadelphia Leather 2004

"Simply put, if you want a real femdom to love you, give her reasons to love you." Gloria Brame

(in reply to sub7boy)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Lack of Replies? - 7/25/2007 8:57:35 AM   
feastie


Posts: 1793
Joined: 6/4/2004
Status: offline 		I'd have to ask you about the content of your emails.  Aside from that, the fact that you are getting a few replies is pretty good.  Not many people get a reply to an email at all, not that one is always deserved.

_____________________________

Snarky and loving it.

Disclaimer: Any views expressed in any post are my opinions only. They may or may not be yours.

(in reply to MisPandora)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Lack of Replies? - 7/25/2007 5:47:27 PM   
Stephann


Posts: 4214
Joined: 12/27/2006
From: Portland, OR
Status: offline 		I'll say something shocking....

I usually get replies to my messages.  Not always, mind you, but a good 50-75%.  I do, because I rarely (read once in a blue moon) write random people.  I almost always write people whom I've interacted with or shared an idea with on the message boards here.  I also suspect I receive more email from women than the average joe schmuck on here, because I know I post (or in the past posted) regularly.

Frankly, people don't change their profiles often.  Most people - women especially - worth writing don't spend eight hours a day writing random people.  Just because a woman has an ad, doesn't mean she's availible, single, or interested in meeting; add all that up to how much email they get from...well...idiots, and you can see how excited they are to wade through dozens of clone emails.

To be dissappointed less, men need to share more, here, in public, and expect nothing more than friendship over there, in private.  The results might even surprise you.

Stephan


_____________________________

Nosce Te Ipsum

"The blade itself incites to violence" - Homer

Men: Find a Woman here

(in reply to feastie)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Lack of Replies? - 7/25/2007 6:03:53 PM   
onegoodgirl


Posts: 126
Joined: 5/6/2007
Status: offline 		I'm surprised so many have responded to this obvious (badly executed) trolling attempt.

I wont respond to the OP because.. well.. I've not nothing that hasn't already been said.. but I will share with the ladies something I've always done on here...

If I do respond to a message I've received with "Thanks, but no thanks"... (for whatever reason) I immediately block them to prevent any of those pesky "whine-whine-whine-but-whyyy" responses from coming back to me.

Edited to fix a typo. Cause I'm anal like that.


< Message edited by onegoodgirl -- 7/25/2007 6:05:01 PM >

_____________________________

"This aint a scene.. it's a god-damned arms race!" - Fall Out Boy

http://www.myspace.com/bellaemiliana

(in reply to Stephann)
Profile   Post #: 36
RE: Lack of Replies? - 7/25/2007 10:16:15 PM   
feastie


Posts: 1793
Joined: 6/4/2004
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: Stephann


To be dissappointed less, men need to share more, here, in public, and expect nothing more than friendship over there, in private.  The results might even surprise you.

Stephan


 
I'm not sure whether to congratulate you, faint, or drool.  Regardless ... "PERFECTLY SAID!" 

_____________________________

Snarky and loving it.

Disclaimer: Any views expressed in any post are my opinions only. They may or may not be yours.

(in reply to Stephann)
Profile   Post #: 37
RE: Lack of Replies? - 7/25/2007 10:30:37 PM   
Stephann


Posts: 4214
Joined: 12/27/2006
From: Portland, OR
Status: offline 		No congratulations are necessary; while I've learned a great deal online, I've never...never... had a BDSM relationship transition from online to offline success.  The last woman I dated, wrote me first on collarme, I wrote her back, and never heard from her again... till I literally bumped into her at a play party.  I didn't even know who she was, until she asked me if I was on the site.  That didn't even turn out well.

On the other hand, I do believe that relationships from online to offline can work; they just need to progress from online to offline very quickly; more than two months, and that person becomes a chat buddy with a next to nil chance of becoming something more.

Anyway...yeah... thanks though :)

Stephan


_____________________________

Nosce Te Ipsum

"The blade itself incites to violence" - Homer

Men: Find a Woman here

(in reply to feastie)
Profile   Post #: 38
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