Collarspace Discussion Forums


Home  Login  Search 

RE: Junior "dommes"


View related threads: (in this forum | in all forums)

Logged in as: Guest
 
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Mistress >> RE: Junior "dommes" Page: <<   < prev  1 [2]
Login
Message << Older Topic   Newer Topic >>
RE: Junior "dommes" - 7/22/2007 10:06:52 AM   
AAkasha


Posts: 4429
Joined: 11/27/2004
Status: offline

I was a pretty sophisticated femdom in a lot of ways when I was 18 - 22.  I had been dominating men for a few years already, and while my experience with "toys" and gear was still on the limited side, I had a really good foundation. But the most important thing was that my desire to dominate was completely authentic. At that time I was still dominating totally clueless vanilla guys, so it was up to me to seduce them and introduce the idea to them.  All done very carefully, very calculated, and in a way that made it clear that just because I was kinkny didn't mean they were going to get LAID.

When I found the BDSM "scene" online it did seem like some of the older kinky people didn't take me as seriously, even in my mid 20s.  When I went to events, though, all the male subs who were older certainly were interested enough, but it felt that they were interested in any femdom because the ratios were so bad for them.  I still didn't connect with men in their 30s or 40s at that age - ever - because it just seemed to weird/creepy and there was no attraction.  I stuck to goth/industrial dance clubs in my 20s to find boytoys and play partners.

Wow, come to think of it, I have never dated a man over the age of 30!

Akasha


_____________________________

Akasha's Web - All original Femdom content since 1995
Don't email me here, email me at [email protected]

(in reply to skareamoos)
Profile   Post #: 21
RE: Junior "dommes" - 7/22/2007 2:49:41 PM   
MistresssAria


Posts: 165
Joined: 6/17/2007
Status: offline 		I'm 23 years old and PREFER submissives who are about twice my age.  I find it more satisfying to have control over someone with that sort of age difference.  I feel that I've have enough life experience/mentors/self-studying/subbing/etc., and most importantly a love for Domination and happy submissives to be able to do this.  I won't say that I know everything, or am an expert in anything, or am trying to just make quick money because god knows that's a great way to lose subs and it doesn't tend to work out as expected.  But we all had to start somewhere.  If asked, I'll go over my knowledge in different areas.....some I've been doing for years, but hand me some bondage rope and I'm tossing that confusing stuff to the side and grabbing my chains ;)


_____________________________

"It never got weird enough for me." -Hunter S. Thompson

~*~*~Mistress Aria~*~*~

(in reply to DawnFire)
Profile   Post #: 22
RE: Junior "dommes" - 7/22/2007 5:54:30 PM   
PairOfDimes


Posts: 324
Joined: 7/20/2006
Status: offline 		I don't think most people in their late teens or early twenties ought to be running another's life--most don't seem very responsible, honestly, although there are exceptions, just as there are young adults who are sufficiently emotionally mature to be good spouses. But I'm entirely okay with the idea of the average nineteen-year-old tying their boyfriend or girlfriend up and doing some spanking, (or, you know, whatever sensation play you want--spanking and bondage aren't special) and with doing d/s roleplay in scenes, and even what I think of as "fun control" outside of scenes (i.e. directing one's partner to wear particular undergarments).

(in reply to skareamoos)
Profile   Post #: 23
RE: Junior "dommes" - 7/22/2007 10:51:17 PM   
aidan


Posts: 904
Joined: 5/28/2005
Status: offline 		Yeah, I think a full D/s "Master and slave" relationship between two late teens/early twenties would end...badly. Like getting married, you're taking on a huge responsiblity, and most likely too quickly. With school/work/whatever to focus on too, it's probably a bad idea to dive that deep into the pool.


_____________________________

Do what now?

"I aim to misbehave."
-Mal Reynolds

(in reply to PairOfDimes)
Profile   Post #: 24
RE: Junior "dommes" - 7/22/2007 11:10:35 PM   
aidan


Posts: 904
Joined: 5/28/2005
Status: offline 		Arrgh, double-post. 

< Message edited by aidan -- 7/22/2007 11:17:05 PM >

_____________________________

Do what now?

"I aim to misbehave."
-Mal Reynolds

(in reply to PairOfDimes)
Profile   Post #: 25
RE: Junior "dommes" - 7/23/2007 2:58:24 AM   
undergroundsea


Posts: 2400
Joined: 6/27/2004
From: Austin, TX
Status: offline 		I agree that maturity and sensibility usually increase with age. That said, I have seen enough mature and sensible young folks (subs and dommes) both in the forums (in this thread for that matter) and in person to not draw conclusions with the age alone. It is the remainder of the interaction or profile that leads me to think one way or the other.

Cheers,

Sea

(in reply to aidan)
Profile   Post #: 26
RE: Junior "dommes" - 7/30/2007 2:07:59 PM   
ade59


Posts: 8
Joined: 1/27/2006
Status: offline 		nothing makes me horny like a young domme, especially one who isnt all about money!

(in reply to undergroundsea)
Profile   Post #: 27
RE: Junior "dommes" - 7/30/2007 3:40:57 PM   
NovelApproach


Posts: 150
Joined: 3/25/2007
Status: offline 		I'd like to step forward in defence of my age-group as well.  I realize that there are a lot of people my age who are immature and unready for the kinds of responsibility it takes to be a good dominant.   However, I know people over the age of thirty who are just as immature, and I've met teenagers as mature and self-aware as the average adult. 

I'm not here on CM to play games or make money, and I'm not looking for wankers to boost my ego.  I've known who I am and what I want since I was sixteen. Now, I'm a bit over twenty, and my sub is two years older than me.  I feel confident in my dominance, and would like to think that I'm doing a good job as Kitty's Mistress.  I'm aware that I still have a lot to learn, and that I'm not mature enough to handle, say... a 24/7 M/s relationship, but I do feel that I could competently handle an older, more experienced sub in a scene if the situation presented itself.


_____________________________

Don't talk at me about the joystick and buttons... tell me about the game.

Sure, I'll Dungeon Master for you. Do you like Eberron? ...oh. That kind of dungeon.

Is it just me or do Theatre Majors make excellent play partners?

(in reply to ade59)
Profile   Post #: 28
RE: Junior "dommes" - 7/31/2007 7:58:12 AM   
bschwimmer


Posts: 630
Joined: 6/30/2005
Status: offline 		i dont loike dommes younger than my daughter  big turn off . i like my dommes between 35 nd 75

(in reply to NovelApproach)
Profile   Post #: 29
RE: Junior "dommes" - 7/31/2007 7:03:27 PM   
iammachine


Posts: 1549
Joined: 1/25/2006
Status: offline 		I think the reason you are seeing many "new members" in that age bracket is multifold.

For one, from 18-22 people are learning a lot about themselves, about life, and about their preferences. They're curious and generally don't have many of the inhibititions that older people may have about experimenting (both a positive and negative aspect).

In the day and age of the interweb and fairly sexy media, more people are being exposed to the idea of kink, and are able to find resources to go about pursuing it more readily. This includes younger people.

And, of course, as has been said, many are opportunistic. They might be young and pretty and have become aware that there a lot of men on the internet that are willing to go to great lengths to interact with a pretty girl. Long before I had fully come to understand my role in the lifestyle, hell long before I was even legal, I got many a random soliciations from men online via chat rooms. I knew the potential for capitalizing on that, though I never had the inclination. Others clearly do.

In another vein of opportunism: wankers. The amount of attention a female that gives the impression of actively seeking anything is downright maddening. Pose as a young woman, you'll have more attention than you know what to do with in rather short order, and a good number of primarily men that will play right along with the fantasy.

As a woman that's barely outside of the aforementioned age bracket, I'd like to think that we're not inherantly clueless. Just because someone is novice doesn't mean that they are clueless. Surely, if they found their way here, its a pretty good indication that they're making some strides in educating themselves one way or another. No one is born the perfect Domme or the perfect sub, these are things we learn.

(in reply to skareamoos)
Profile   Post #: 30
RE: Junior "dommes" - 7/31/2007 8:11:44 PM   
aidan


Posts: 904
Joined: 5/28/2005
Status: offline 		I don't mean to make a blanket statement about all the young'uns. It's just that I think a handful of shining examples - and we're out there, I know, I am one (can you hear the horn tooting?) - does not negate that most of us are twits, I think. I hate to sound harsh, but it's only because I care. Shallow, narcisstic, stupid teens grow into shallw, narccistic, stupid adults.


_____________________________

Do what now?

"I aim to misbehave."
-Mal Reynolds

(in reply to iammachine)
Profile   Post #: 31
RE: Junior "dommes" - 8/1/2007 5:36:26 AM   
bschwimmer


Posts: 630
Joined: 6/30/2005
Status: offline 		true I started visiting the s/m clubs in NY @ 17 God I miss the Hellfire club and Paddles

(in reply to aidan)
Profile   Post #: 32
RE: Junior "dommes" - 8/1/2007 12:33:37 PM   
iammachine


Posts: 1549
Joined: 1/25/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: aidan

I don't mean to make a blanket statement about all the young'uns. It's just that I think a handful of shining examples - and we're out there, I know, I am one (can you hear the horn tooting?) - does not negate that most of us are twits, I think. I hate to sound harsh, but it's only because I care. Shallow, narcisstic, stupid teens grow into shallw, narccistic, stupid adults.



I'm of the opinion, that many people, regardless of age, experience, or lack therefore: make for fantastic asshats.

As such, I am free to assume, since the majority of the populace is probably going to disappoint regardless, that I can judge everyone as an individual, without prejudice. ;)

I'm an equal opportunity misanthrope.

< Message edited by iammachine -- 8/1/2007 12:34:06 PM >

(in reply to aidan)
Profile   Post #: 33
RE: Junior "dommes" - 8/1/2007 12:40:38 PM   
aidan


Posts: 904
Joined: 5/28/2005
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: iammachine

quote:

ORIGINAL: aidan

I don't mean to make a blanket statement about all the young'uns. It's just that I think a handful of shining examples - and we're out there, I know, I am one (can you hear the horn tooting?) - does not negate that most of us are twits, I think. I hate to sound harsh, but it's only because I care. Shallow, narcisstic, stupid teens grow into shallw, narccistic, stupid adults.



I'm of the opinion, that many people, regardless of age, experience, or lack therefore: make for fantastic asshats.

As such, I am free to assume, since the majority of the populace is probably going to disappoint regardless, that I can judge everyone as an individual, without prejudice. ;)

I'm an equal opportunity misanthrope.

"Is it really bigotry if you don't like everyone?" ;)

I'm in total agreement with that statement, I was just focusing specifically on the topic of younger people.

To quote Dr. Cox: "People are bastards. Their bastard-coated bastards with bastard filling."

I hope I can grow up to be just as cynical and scary and Irish someday. :D


_____________________________

Do what now?

"I aim to misbehave."
-Mal Reynolds

(in reply to iammachine)
Profile   Post #: 34
RE: Junior "dommes" - 8/1/2007 1:33:37 PM   
iammachine


Posts: 1549
Joined: 1/25/2006
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: aidan

quote:

ORIGINAL: iammachine

quote:

ORIGINAL: aidan

I don't mean to make a blanket statement about all the young'uns. It's just that I think a handful of shining examples - and we're out there, I know, I am one (can you hear the horn tooting?) - does not negate that most of us are twits, I think. I hate to sound harsh, but it's only because I care. Shallow, narcisstic, stupid teens grow into shallw, narccistic, stupid adults.



I'm of the opinion, that many people, regardless of age, experience, or lack therefore: make for fantastic asshats.

As such, I am free to assume, since the majority of the populace is probably going to disappoint regardless, that I can judge everyone as an individual, without prejudice. ;)

I'm an equal opportunity misanthrope.

"Is it really bigotry if you don't like everyone?" ;)

I'm in total agreement with that statement, I was just focusing specifically on the topic of younger people.

To quote Dr. Cox: "People are bastards. Their bastard-coated bastards with bastard filling."

I hope I can grow up to be just as cynical and scary and Irish someday. :D



I'm half irish, does that mean I'm halfway there?

... The other half is colombian, does that mean I get there at lightspeed? :P

(in reply to aidan)
Profile   Post #: 35
RE: Junior "dommes" - 8/1/2007 6:57:57 PM   
undergroundsea


Posts: 2400
Joined: 6/27/2004
From: Austin, TX
Status: offline
quote:

ORIGINAL: iammachine
I think the reason you are seeing many "new members" in that age bracket is multifold.


I agree. I think one fundamental reason we see more diversity with respect to age in the BDSM communities today is that the threshhold to overcome to engage in BDSM with others is lower today than it was in times past. BDSM is not as taboo as it was in the past. The social stigma or inner conflict to resolve within self is not as great as it might have been in the past. Also, the internet makes it easier to find BDSM communities. Before the internet was around, the amount of effort needed to find BDSM communities was much greater. How much energy one is willing to expend towards BDSM is related to where BDSM lies in one's social priorities. For most people, BDSM interests start to invite greater importance within one's social priorities with age and time.

My two cents.

Cheers,

Sea

(in reply to iammachine)
Profile   Post #: 36
Page:   <<   < prev  1 [2]
All Forums >> [Community Discussions] >> Ask a Mistress >> RE: Junior "dommes" Page: <<   < prev  1 [2]
Jump to:





New Messages No New Messages
Hot Topic w/ New Messages Hot Topic w/o New Messages
Locked w/ New Messages Locked w/o New Messages
 Post New Thread
 Reply to Message
 Post New Poll
 Submit Vote
 Delete My Own Post
 Delete My Own Thread
 Rate Posts




Collarchat.com © 2025
Terms of Service Privacy Policy Spam Policy

0.109